Just curious....

How easy is it to confuse or mix up love with friendship? Like, how would a friendship change if there is sex involved based on "some" love feelings from one (or maybe both) person is physically attracted to the other person? Would there be guilt behind it and possibly harm the friendship?

In my experience and from what I've seen, I think once a friendship goes to the next level, it usually gets blown out of the water. The dynamics change. Someone, usually the woman, ends up wanting a commitment.

There are exceptions. I'm still friends with a someone from my single days, going waaaay back. We were friends, both single, and well...you know. He attended my wedding, and we're still in touch. No, not that kind of "touch". :lol:

Still, I don't see many friendships survive after intimacy.

It worked for Dawson and Joey. However, I think that most of the time it completely changes a friendship into something else. It's bringing a friendship to something that, in my opinion, is reserved for marriage. I don't think it's a smart thing to do if the friendship means much, seeing as it can destroy what was there before.

I think it ruins a friendship.
I was "intimate" with a friend who I had known for years.
We kind of had this on again off again attraction thing going, although I was probably more into it more than she was.
I do think the times we were more than friends definatly put a strain on our friendship, to the point where we drifted apart. Sometimes things were really awkward between us. She used to hang out with me any my roommate all the time years ago, now I rarely see her. Ah well, these things happen.

Hmmm.... interesting, interesting responses....

I wonder how this would affect if one of the persons isn't ready for a fullblown commitment for a romantic relationship (like they are a bit mentally immature at the moment) and then more happens. That would surely make things awkward and guilt-ridden, as someone already said. I mean, if a friendship is there and then more happens, it would make it a bit easier to talk intimately about the feelings, I would think. I could be wrong because it seems to strain the friendship more often than survive it or actually move into a romantic relationship. This is definitely complicated.

It ruined a nice friendship I had.

In my experience and from what I've seen, I think once a friendship goes to the next level, it usually gets blown out of the water. The dynamics change. Someone, usually the woman, ends up wanting a commitment.

There are exceptions. I'm still friends with a someone from my single days, going waaaay back. We were friends, both single, and well...you know. He attended my wedding, and we're still in touch. No, not that kind of "touch". :lol:

Still, I don't see many friendships survive after intimacy.


Janice is right, it never works, it ruined a great friendship for me, and I really regretted it.

It's seems it would be too akward to keep a friendship level after being intimate. I tried to be friends w exes and it didn't work.

I think it depends on what kind of relationship youre going after. If youre just going for a 'friends with benefits' kinda thing, down the line it will ruin things. There are some times though where you wind up marrying your best friend and whatever. I just think it all depends on what you want out of it, and if its wanted equally on both sides.

I wound up marrying her.

I think it depends on what kind of relationship youre going after. If youre just going for a 'friends with benefits' kinda thing, down the line it will ruin things. There are some times though where you wind up marrying your best friend and whatever. I just think it all depends on what you want out of it, and if its wanted equally on both sides.
Yeah, see, I agree. It can't always lead to something bad.

Yeah, I agree with the last two posts. It's all in uniqueness based upon the individuals, their history, their thoughts and feelings, their views, their opinions, beliefs, etc... No one else's but those TWO individuals can decide.

So it will always be different or close to other relationships. I've learned that no matter which advice or how much advice anyone gets, they have go what's best for themselves and what they feel is right for them and the other person. I guess it's usually depends what will have to be given through time and base it on both persons' decisions. Asking for a lot of people's advice, I found, is that you will always get many different views based upon each individual's own experience that may or may not side with you. It's best to just decide and have a feel of what's best for YOU. True, true, true....

hard to say.

ive had some friends who ive been intimate with and stayed close with after, others ive dated and then remained friends.
currently im sort of involved with my best friend and we'll see what happens with that. we've gone awhile not really together, not really just friends, but we'll see.

Something I've observed in my relatively short (1.9 decade) lifespan is that, based on the friends I've known who've entered into a relationship - it's either ended in marriage...or not only do they break up, but the friendship is dissolved.

My personal experience is amazingly limited. All I'll say is this - I was really good friends with somebody for a really long time, and now not so much, due largely to a growing amount of feelings for said friend, and an admitted inability to show emotion on my part. (And yes, you guys, this thread's the reason I've been so damn cranky today...dug up some stuff I was happier trying not to think about)

No, not that kind of "touch". :lol:

Glad you cleared that up.

Eh... I became intimate with one of my best friends and ended up dating him. We're still together, almost eight months.

So really, it depends on the two kinds of people, I guess.

My boyfriend and I were best friends for years before we started dating. We've been dating for almost 8 months :D

Wow! Congrats to Kay Scarpetta and Rock Princess. You have both been lucky.

It does seem that this scenario usually turns out as desipating friendships OR marriages. Interesting...

Wow! Congrats to Kay Scarpetta and Rock Princess. You have both been lucky.
Thanks! :wave:

It ruins the friendship a lot of times - though I have seen a few exceptions- if the next level doesn't work out.

It's great when people take it to the next level and stay together.

What happens when the intimate level doesn't work? How many go back to just being friends?
Not too many that I have seen.

Yeah, it can either be very risky business OR very rewarding. Either way, it's an experience, but still.... Hmm...

My boyfriend and I were best friends for years before we started dating. We've been dating for almost 8 months :D

But, wait, I thought you said (http://www.sitcomsonline.com/boards/showthread.php?t=145757&page=1) you were going on your first date tonight. How does this work?!

what about those who have broken up after a relationship with a friend? were you still able to be friends or was it sabotaged because you couldn't go back to the way it was before after what had happened between you?

Did you ever talk to that person? I still think you should.

But, wait, I thought you said (http://www.sitcomsonline.com/boards/showthread.php?t=145757&page=1) you were going on your first date tonight. How does this work?!
Ok.


I have been dating him for 8 months but because we live so far away,we can't go on dates. And because his birthday is in a few days,His mom is treating us to a date. It's ****ed up,I know :rolleyes:

It's ****ed up,I know :rolleyes:

Sounds like a standard relationship to me...

;)

Sounds like a standard relationship to me...

;)
:lol:

But, wait, I thought you said (http://www.sitcomsonline.com/boards/showthread.php?t=145757&page=1) you were going on your first date tonight. How does this work?!
she probably means dating as in being in a relationship, not actually going on dates.