Ok,there's this guy at work who i REALLLLLLLY like,i know i sound like a 13 year old school girl,but i'm infatuated with him.I'm currently going out with another guy who has tons of female friends who fancy him,and i get really jealous-and its tearing us apart,so if we break up,i'm willing to go out with this 30 year old guy.We get along great and i think we could have a good relationship,but i am kinda worried about the age gap.I dont want people to say he's robbing the cradle,etc.He says age is just a number,so its fine with him,but i thought i'd ask a second opinion.Could anyone give me some advice? Keep in mind that despite the 11 year age gap,we have the same interests,and we have heaps in common.What do you think? Anyone else experienced age differences in relationships?

the first time i read this, i thought it said "he is currently going out with another guy."

do what you think is right ;)

Does he know that you are currently seeing someone else? If so neither of you seem to think that should stand in your way so that is one thing you have in common. He sounds like a pervert, your not even 20 yet! Does he have a history of going for youger gals? You may just be the flavor of the month.

He sounds like a pervert, your not even 20 yet! Does he have a history of going for youger gals? You may just be the flavor of the month.

Yep. I agree with this statement. It would be different if you were 30 and he was 40 because by then you would have more experience in relationships. Most 19 year old girls are impressionable and easy to manipulate and older guys are quick to take advantage of that. There are exceptions to every rule though. I guess going to a movie with him or something wouldn't hurt, just be careful and make sure he isn't just after one thing. :)

Yuck, I'm 24 and the oldest I'd go out with is 31.

I'm also 19 and to me that is way too old. The oldest guy I would go out with would be like 25.

hey, dont worry about what other people think. You need to find happiness in yourself not in everyone elses opinions. If he makes you happy then go ahead.

Its up to you. If you really like this person and think it may have a chance, there is no harm in giving a relationship a try.

Age doesn't matter. If you were younger it would be different. But as for this other guy you are going out with you should just break up with him now. What are you waiting around for if you are obviously not interested?

Ok,there's this guy at work who i REALLLLLLLY like,i know i sound like a 13 year old school girl,but i'm infatuated with him.I'm currently going out with another guy who has tons of female friends who fancy him,and i get really jealous-and its tearing us apart,so if we break up,i'm willing to go out with this 30 year old guy.We get along great and i think we could have a good relationship,but i am kinda worried about the age gap.I dont want people to say he's robbing the cradle,etc.He says age is just a number,so its fine with him,but i thought i'd ask a second opinion.Could anyone give me some advice? Keep in mind that despite the 11 year age gap,we have the same interests,and we have heaps in common.What do you think? Anyone else experienced age differences in relationships?

If you 2 like each other and don't mind, then no one else should care either. You're both adults.

When my husband and I got married I was 18 he was 25. There was a little "generation gap" thing there. He was a 50's guy. I was a 60's girl. Well it worked out just fine after I convinced him that The Beatles were better than Elvis! :lol: Actually that was about the only MAJOR difference that we had. :lol:
Anyway, I personally think that your age gap is way to large considering your young age. But as we all do, we do what we think is best. If you decide to date this guy, I wish you good luck and BE CAREFUL! ;) :wave:

In my opinion, age doesn't mean a thing. If you really love him, you have to learn to ignore what people will say. Trust me, they will say something... people have a comment for everything. But follow your heart. Remember, you're the one dating him, not other people. Good luck :)

it could work, you're both adults. i wouldn't date anymore more than 2 years older than me or so.

Go for it! You never know it might work out great. :)

Depends on the whole...maturity level thing and where each of you are in life.

When I was 19 years I was in love and dating man that was 32 years old. I think age is just a number and if you really like each other I think that you should go for it :)

I'm 19 also. I really don't see a problem with going out with someone that is 30. You're above the legal age. It is quite a few years difference, but relationships aren't based on the age of the people involved. Although, you're going to find it more difficult than a relationship with someone your age.

The only thing you will have to take into consideration if it does work is; are you ready to give up the entire dating scene? You're going to have to grow up and be more mature than you would be with a guy your age. He's 30... He's going to want to get married and have children sooner than you may. (Of course, this is just going by the majority of 19-21 year olds that I know... most are very immature and only have one thing in mind. Partying.)

I don't know. If you end up going for it and dropping the guy you're with I hope you're happy. :)

I'll be 20 this year for the record :) I know it sounds perverted and he shouldn't be going for younger girls,but he's honestly not what you might think.He's never gone out with younger girls,and he's never been a sleaze either.We are really great friends,and we both think it could go further,and he says he likes me because i make him laugh,not because i am so young and he just wants an easy lay (i am NOT that way at all) We get along great and he doesn't have a history of going out with younger girls.He thinks i am a 20 year old with the maturity of a 30 year old.
Thanks to everyone for the encouragement,i think i am going to go for it!

The only thing you will have to take into consideration if it does work is; are you ready to give up the entire dating scene? You're going to have to grow up and be more mature than you would be with a guy your age. He's 30... He's going to want to get married and have children sooner than you may. (Of course, this is just going by the majority of 19-21 year olds that I know... most are very immature and only have one thing in mind. Partying.)

Thats what he means when he says "you're not like most other 19 year old girls",because i dont go out and party and i haven't been with alot of boys.I dont mind giving up the dating scene at all,i really do want to meet someone i could settle down with.I never seem to meet the 'right' people,and there are alot of freaks out there,so the idea of settling down with someone who i can really see a future with is good for me. :)

Thats what he means when he says "you're not like most other 19 year old girls",because i dont go out and party and i haven't been with alot of boys.I dont mind giving up the dating scene at all,i really do want to meet someone i could settle down with.I never seem to meet the 'right' people,and there are alot of freaks out there,so the idea of settling down with someone who i can really see a future with is good for me. :)

See, now you're the kind of person I could talk to. lol I'm just like you in that way. I dont party, I dont drink, I don't smoke... I'm pretty tame for my age I've been told. I'm always getting told I'm 19 going on 35. lol

Well, I'm usually against relationships with large age gaps, but don't mind me, I'm still a young'n myself. :happyface It's great that you're thinking this over and not in a hurry to take the dive. Since you two are mature adults, I say go for it. You're a cool person and he seems like a cool dude...From what I've read you guys are pretty compatible! If you feel like it's the right thing to do, then it's worth the risk. I hope it works out for you. Good luck!

Well i'm 29 and would not have any interest in a female under 20. I prefer a female to be out of college which means my age range is 23 to 31

I agree that age is just a number, but maturity isn't. I'm 31 and my wife is 28. We are close enough in age that we grew up in the same generation and like the same things and have alot in common. That's not to say a 30 year old and a 19 year old wouldn't have anything in common. I just think in my opinion that when you are 19, you want different things than a 30 year old. I think age is a factor here. If you were 29 and he was 40, I think that isn't a big deal. You will be much more mature and would have experienced a little more about life. I just think 19 year olds shouldn't go steady with any 1 person. They should go out to parties, date different people and just enjoy life.

I'll be 20 this year for the record :) I know it sounds perverted and he shouldn't be going for younger girls,but he's honestly not what you might think.He's never gone out with younger girls,and he's never been a sleaze either.We are really great friends,and we both think it could go further,and he says he likes me because i make him laugh,not because i am so young and he just wants an easy lay (i am NOT that way at all) We get along great and he doesn't have a history of going out with younger girls.He thinks i am a 20 year old with the maturity of a 30 year old.
Thanks to everyone for the encouragement,i think i am going to go for it!
Good, this guy seems like a perfectly nice person so I wouldn't worry about the age difference or anything like that. Good luck! :)

It will only work out if he respects you. Don't worry about what others think. But you must know that he respects you. The best way to find that out is to give the relationship a chance... see where it leads.

Good luck!

"Age matters not in the persuit of happiness, and even less in the name of love."


Eh. Go for it.

This is something that bugs me. It doesn't have anything to do with you two. It's just that the girl I'm in love with just turned 20. She's dating someone where we both work who's 37.

Of course, i know someone from work who's in her 50s and is married to a guy in his 80s.

See, now you're the kind of person I could talk to. lol I'm just like you in that way. I dont party, I dont drink, I don't smoke... I'm pretty tame for my age I've been told. I'm always getting told I'm 19 going on 35. lol

Same here. I'm 25 going on like 50. :lol: Get home from work, bitch about the day, fall asleep.

Thats what he means when he says "you're not like most other 19 year old girls",because i dont go out and party and i haven't been with alot of boys.I dont mind giving up the dating scene at all,i really do want to meet someone i could settle down with.I never seem to meet the 'right' people,and there are alot of freaks out there,so the idea of settling down with someone who i can really see a future with is good for me. :)
Wow I just wish most girls who are your age had your mentality :thumbsup:

I think that if you both love eachother, then that's all that matters. I know someone who married a man 19 years older than she. So what???? They love eachother, have two kids, and everything's going swell. :)

My husband is 17 1/2 years older than me, and we'll be married 20 years this September. Age was never an issue, and we have a great marriage. I do find that it bothers me now as we both get older. We never know what life will bring, but chances are, I'll be widowed relatively young.

Eleven years isn't so bad though. See where it takes you.

My husband is 17 1/2 years older than me, and we'll be married 20 years this September. Age was never an issue, and we have a great marriage. I do find that it bothers me now as we both get older. We never know what life will bring, but chances are, I'll be widowed relatively young.

Eleven years isn't so bad though. See where it takes you.
I had relationships with men that were 20 years older than I and I also have dated men that were younger; I think when it comes to love that it should not matter what the age difference is or if you are of different races, etc. because I truly believe that love is blind in many ways :D

Thanks to everyone for the great advice.We've decided to go for it!

Yay! Congrats! :cheers:

Thanks to everyone for the great advice.We've decided to go for it!
Congrats..I wish all the happiness in the world :wave:

Thanks to everyone for the great advice.We've decided to go for it!

Congrats. Good luck. :)