View Full Version : Men vs. Women: Showering


Dutabi84
10-25-2004, 11:34 PM
How To Shower Like a Woman

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups

4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.

5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.

8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

10. Rinse conditioner off hair.

11. Shave armpits and legs.

12. Turn off shower.

13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.

14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hairin super absorbent towel.

15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.

16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


How To Shower Like a Man

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake weiner at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror . Admire the size of your weiner and scratch your ass.

4. Get in the shower.

5. Wash your face

6. Wash your armpits.

7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.

9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs
stuck on the soap..

11. Shampoo your hair.

12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

13. Pee.

14. Rinse off and get out of shower.

15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

16. Admire weiner size in mirror again.

17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake weiner at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.

19. Throw wet towel on bed.

If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this email, there is something so very wrong with you.

;)

TheHappyBurgerMeister
10-25-2004, 11:37 PM
LOL, that's hilarious. I'm a female and I definitely don't do that much in the shower! Some are really true though.

Brent88
10-26-2004, 12:07 AM
:rofl:

¤I Love Clay Aiken¤
10-26-2004, 12:24 AM
Dude I average about 9 minutes a shower.

Kay Scarpetta
10-26-2004, 07:22 AM
I average about 20 minutes a shower. I just stand there when I'm done and let the hot water spray on my face. It's refreshing.

Moonlight Lady
10-26-2004, 10:07 AM
I average about 15-20 minutes in the shower without all the different wash cloths and loofahs and I rarely shampoo twice.

BUSH-2004!!!
10-26-2004, 12:51 PM
Shower??? Isn't this what you do on Saturday nights???:p

Brent88
10-26-2004, 01:05 PM
Originally posted by BUSH-2004!!!
Shower??? Isn't this what you do on Saturday nights???:p

:rofl:!!!!!!!!!

Superstar
10-26-2004, 01:20 PM
:rofl:

Georgia's on my Mind
10-26-2004, 01:21 PM
no...

*Pleasant Tomorrow*
10-26-2004, 03:12 PM
Originally posted by Dutabi84
How To Shower Like a Woman

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups

4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.

5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.

8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

10. Rinse conditioner off hair.

11. Shave armpits and legs.

12. Turn off shower.

13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.

14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hairin super absorbent towel.

15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.

16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


How To Shower Like a Man

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake weiner at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror . Admire the size of your weiner and scratch your ass.

4. Get in the shower.

5. Wash your face

6. Wash your armpits.

7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.

9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs
stuck on the soap..

11. Shampoo your hair.

12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

13. Pee.

14. Rinse off and get out of shower.

15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

16. Admire weiner size in mirror again.

17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake weiner at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.

19. Throw wet towel on bed.

If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this email, there is something so very wrong with you.

;) Damn. :rotflmao:

I'm a girl and I definately do NOT do all of that **** in the shower.

TJL
10-26-2004, 05:12 PM
Oh, I don't do any of that stuff.
Any of the lovely ladies out there who think I'm lying can gladly join me in the shower and see for yourself.

:grineyes:

;)

Rhiannon
10-26-2004, 05:28 PM
that is pretty accurate

dawsongirl
10-26-2004, 10:45 PM
lol...I am so glad I don't share my shower with anyone.

Lady T
10-26-2004, 10:48 PM
11. Women share more than just their arm pits and their legs;)

Cactus Jack
10-27-2004, 08:08 AM
:rotflmao:

~*Belle N'Shawn forever~*
10-27-2004, 08:49 AM
yea i just go in the shower wash my hair, use body wash, then shave my legs and all that and condion my hair rinse it out then i'm out of the shower LOL But that does give me good ideas about ur husband or boyfriend hmmmm:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Dude111
12-29-2024, 01:08 AM
:rofl:


I usually walk naked to the bathroom,get in .. Put stoppers in the overflow so I can fill the tub up ALL THE WAY and I just lay in nice warm water!! (I take baths and not showers)