In The Silence

[janet42]

Great job on Chapter 7!

[*Pleasant Tomorrow*]

Sorry it took so long this time, guys. Hope you enjoy. I feel like the story is kind of slow and repetitive at this point, but it will pick up.

Chapter 8: Her eyes will say “go”

January 1981

It had been almost two months, but Janet still found herself going over and over that moment when Jack had tried to kiss her, wondering what had possessed him to do that, wondering what he was feeling…and wondering why she had stopped it. She had come to the conclusion a long time ago that Jack didn’t feel the same way about her that she felt about him, and it took all she could to force her feelings away…and then this. The shock of it all had caused her to push away, and now the chance was lost once more with the entrance of a new roommate into the picture.

Cindy was just as sweet, loveable, and naïve as Chrissy was and Janet found herself taking a liking to her almost immediately. At first she had wondered if Cindy had noticed the slight tension between her and Jack, but she concluded that she hadn’t. How could she, when there was no evidence of it? The two were easily able to act as though the incident had never even occurred.

Janet noticed that Jack certainly didn’t have any trouble forgetting the incident. Different women seemed to waltz in and out of his life…and then there was Cheryl, whom he seemed a bit more serious about. It frustrated Janet. It wasn’t that she had expected any more out of Jack, it wasn’t that she had ever really expected him to show particular attention to her; it was that, when he did, if only for a moment, it was so easy for him to ignore it as if it were a dream-a dream that is so wonderful in the moment, but upon waking seems to slip away from memory.

So if he was going to act as though there was nothing there, so was she. Pretending was something that she had found she had a great talent for. Putting on a happy face was second nature.

And so, it was the perfect opportunity to spite Jack by agreeing to go out with his girlfriend’s father, Andrew. She felt that he was a sweet enough man that it would be no trouble at all having a good time with him.

Jack, on the other hand, stood there content with the monster he had created in Andrew; he was proud of the hip, modern guy he had turned his girlfriend’s father into. And then the next moment, Janet became Andrew’s target. As he began to sweet-talk Janet, Jack began to panic. She couldn’t go out on a date with a man Jack had trained to be like himself…he’d destroy the poor girl! If she were going to go out with any fool like Jack, it was going to be Jack. And it wasn’t going to be him, he knew. It wasn’t going to be him because it couldn’t be him.

He winced as he heard Andrew suggest to Janet that they go to “The Blue Grotto,” the restaurant Jack had told him he always took women whom he wanted to get in the mood. He saw Janet’s bright smile and her sparkling eyes as she walked out the door with Andrew, and his date with Cheryl instantly became unimportant. Janet was all he could think about right now. He found any excuse he could to go after her and he did, reluctantly bringing Cheryl along.

But naturally Jack’s paranoia only caused more trouble, and him interfering in Janet and Andrew’s date not only angered Janet, but it angered Cheryl as well. He sulked as he was left alone in The Blue Grotto to ponder what had just happened. Cheryl had dumped him, Janet was angry at him, and he didn’t know whether or not he simply didn’t trust Andrew with Janet, or if he was jealous.

But why should he be jealous? Janet was his friend and she had a right to do whatever she wanted to. Why did the incident cause a rush of anxiety, a compelling urge to get Andrew away from Janet?

He got up only half thinking, nearly tripping on the mess of chairs surrounding him, and began to walk back to the apartment to apologize to Janet. Not necessarily for what had just happened, but for what had almost happened weeks ago. He was convinced that when he had tried to kiss Janet, he wasn’t in his right senses.

The bustle of the city around him made it hard for Jack to think clearly. Passing a young couple that was clearly in love, he wondered why such things weren’t so easy for him. And then he wondered why such a thought was haunting him when he was worrying about Janet. It didn’t make sense to him. He still wouldn’t let it. That moment that night was merely a heat of the moment situation. It didn’t stem from love or passion, he tried to convince himself, but from a sporadic moment of lust. It had to be because it was a much simpler explanation. It would be a quicker resolution. And he wouldn’t have to worry about feeling pain nor causing it.

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Jack stood in the living room embarrassed as water trickled down his shirt. Janet, upset once again, never held back an opportunity to splash something at Jack when she was angry at him. And she was livid. So, naturally, Janet knocked the bowl of soapy water Jack had in his hands all over him.

How could he? First, completely putting that one night behind him, and then proceeding to give Andrew horrible ideas on how to treat women?

Glaring back at him, she tried to convey her feelings with her eyes and he sighed, somewhat understanding her.

“I’ll go get some more soapy water to get that stain out, Mr. Gaynor,” Cindy said amidst the awkward silence, and left the room.

Andrew nodded and then stood there, fidgeting uncomfortably as his eyes focused on the other two left in the room. “I’m really, very sorry about everything. This is entirely my fault.”

“What? No, Andrew, this is not your fault,” Janet said walking over to him and smiling to ease his apparent discomfort with the situation. “It’s one hundred perfect Jack’s fault,” she said, glancing back at Jack with another glare, and then turned back to Andrew.

Jack sighed and nodded with a forlorn expression on his face, acknowledging his own stupidity. “I, um, just gonna go change,” he said and began to head to his room. Janet looked at him, almost feeling a bit bad as he walked toward his room like a sad puppy.

“Jack, wait,” Andrew said, causing Jack to pause in front of him and Janet. Andrew turned toward Janet once more. “No, Janet, this is my fault. It’s my fault because I should have seen it.”

Janet looked at Andrew quizzically and replied, “You should have seen what?”

Andrew smiled at her and then looked over her shoulder to Jack. Without saying another word, he walked back into Janet’s room to retrieve his wine stained pants, which he then took into the kitchen to clean with Cindy. All the while, Jack and Janet stood there in silence trying to understand what Andrew was trying to imply.

But Janet knew. And a part of Jack knew, too. The part of him that wasn’t afraid to deny it. The part of him that wasn’t afraid, period. That part knew why he ran after Janet when she was on her date with Andrew. It knew why he blew off his date with Cheryl for Janet. It knew why he tried to kiss her that night.

Janet looked up at Jack with an apologetic expression, although her anger was still there. As nicely as she could she said, “I still think you’re an idiot.”

Her honesty put a smile on Jack’s face. “Well, at least you’re being honest.”

Still looking up at him and shaking her head, she went on, “I just don’t understand you sometimes, Jack.”

“I don’t understand myself half the time.”

“I’m going to go help Andrew and Cindy,” she said, unsatisfied with his reply.

“Janet, wait.”

She stopped immediately at his words and turned around, hopeful that he would say more. Hopeful that he would say what she wanted to hear.

“I know what’s been on your mind because it’s been on my mind, too,” he said, staring as deeply into her eyes as he could for the distance between them: she near the end of the sofa, and he still near his bedroom door. Janet said nothing and he went on, “I wasn’t thinking, Janet. I’m sorry, I never planned that to happen that night and I’m glad you stopped me. It was wrong of me to do. I know we agreed a long time ago to never”-

“It’s fine,” Janet said nonchalantly, although she was really trying her best to hold back tears. There he was taking it all back. She had expected it and yet she was still taken by surprise. She knew that she was the one that had stopped the kiss from happening, but she didn’t think that Jack would completely regret it; he had initiated it after all. But he had. He had regretted it, and she couldn’t do this anymore. She subconsciously touched her heart and nodded. “It’s fine,” she said again, half talking to herself as well, half talking to her heart. It would be okay, she was thinking. It wouldn’t hurt so much once she pushed Jack Tripper out of her heart.

“I just didn’t want that lingering around us. I saw that it upset you…I just didn’t know what to say.” He stared into her eyes again, seeing pain but not realizing the extent of it. “Sorry.” And he went into his room.

He didn’t mean it, but he wasn’t lying when he said he wasn’t thinking that night. When he had tried to kiss Janet his mind wasn’t in control; his heart was. But he didn’t mean it when he said he was sorry. He never regretted any moment with her.

Jack had ignored the entire situation because he was still afraid. Love was terrifying enough…but falling for a friend, a best friend, was far beyond that.

“Are young people always this foolish?” Andrew half jokingly asked Cindy in the kitchen.

She smiled, but with a concerned expression on her face as she continued to worry about her two roommates. She hadn’t lived there long, but she knew. Chrissy hadn’t bothered to tell her about the strange relationship between Jack and Janet because, by the time she had moved out, she had begun to doubt it again. So Cindy was left to figure it out on her own. She played the fool along with them, but she was no fool. “Not always,” she replied to Andrew.

“So you see it, too?” He asked.

“Yeah. And I know in their hearts, so do they.”

[*Pleasant Tomorrow*]

Chapter 9: It Won’t Bother Me At All

October 1981

Where roommates came and went, Jack and Janet always seemed to remain, firmly planted, just as unmoving in their physical surroundings as they were in their emotions. Looking around her bedroom, Janet checked for anything that might be out of place. Finding nothing wrong, she decided to fluff up the pillows on her new roommate’s bed for the tenth time. Looking around once more, she smiled contentedly, clasping her hands. Terri wouldn’t arrive for another hour and everything was perfect.

But in natural Janet fashion, she was worried…not so much about whether or not Terri would like her or if they’d all get along, but whether or not Terri would find an interest in Jack. Or, worse yet, whether or not Jack would find an interest in Terri. She stopped a moment, realizing the jealousy such thoughts implied. But at this point in her relationship with Jack, it was not something she was as readily able to admit. At this point, she continued to reassure herself there was nothing there. If Jack didn’t want there to be, neither did she.

Wants and hopes, however, weren’t as strong as her feelings for Jack…and ultimately there was little she could do about her subconscious. Jealousy and insecurity were still very alive.

Heading to the living room to straighten up some more, she found Jack lying on the couch completely oblivious.

“Gosh, Jack, do you always have to be so darn lazy?”

“Mmhm,” Jack said not really paying attention as he tossed a chip into his mouth and continued to read the newspaper.

Janet rolled her eyes and began to dust things off, glancing over at Jack every now and then. Did men always have to be so oblivious? Did they always have to completely shut everything out?

But she didn’t care anymore, she told herself. “I don’t care,” she quietly uttered to herself as she mindlessly wiped a part of the table by the kitchen door that she had already wiped.

“What don’t you care about?” Jack asked, looking up from the paper?

Now he pays attention. Janet started to say something, but stopped and put on a fake smile, mimicking pleasantness. “Nothing, nothing.” She sighed, her smile disappearing, feeling as if she were overreacting a bit.

“You sure?” he asked. He knew something was on her mind. There always was…he just didn’t always know what.

“Yeah,” she said with a reassuring smile, and continued her dusting.

Her spiral of worry often seemed to get the best of her, however. The lies she had been telling herself for months were no match; she still had feelings for him deep down. Did he even think about her? Looking at him reading the paper, unaware of any emotions that showed on her face, she concluded that no, he did not.



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After all the trouble he had caused for Terri when he had first met her, Jack hoped he would have some alone time with her so that he could get to know her better and for her to see he wasn’t really a completely horrible person.

But she had that seductive voice! What was she doing to him? What was going on beneath that blonde head of hair of hers? Get to know him better-really know him? What was she trying to pull? He panicked. Her eyes drew him in, but he panicked. And when Jack panicked…he made jokes.

Similar panic surged through Janet as she spelled out the word “trust” on the scrabble board in Mr. Furley’s apartment. She tapped her nails impatiently on the table while Mr. Furley placed his own tiles on the board painfully slow. “Alright, you win!” she shouted and jumped up off of the chair to leave.

“Hold it!” Furley said, glaring at her. “You’re still ahead. Now, I intend to win and I intend to win tonight!”

Janet sat back down, shaking her leg unable to sit still.

The same energy spun through Jack’s mind upstairs, but he was on a roll with his storytelling. He held Terri’s hand, still looking into her eyes though he didn’t quite know why, and explained to her the time when he was seven and his older brother convinced him that he was a lost Munchkin and belonged back in Oz. It was hard to keep a straight face as he told the lie, but the humor eased his discomfort and made the deep glare of Terri’s eyes less potent.

At that moment, Terri was relieved that she was a good actress. She continued to feign interest to make Jack feel better, struggling to keep a straight face herself. If Jack was getting over an old flame, as Larry had suggested, it was her intent as a friend to comfort him.

Janet ran out of Furley’s apartment, nearly tripping in her heels as she ran up the stairs, and burst through the door to find Jack and Terri with their arms around each other. Her blood boiled. She had to talk to Terri.


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“And if you’ve got something going with Jack, it won’t bother me at all.” All through the next day, Terri’s words rung through Janet’s ears. She was more relieved than she would’ve liked to have admitted that Terri really wasn’t coming on to Jack…but those words. What was she saying? A third roommate had never suggested such a thing before. The possibility of anything going on between she and Jack in the past had caused Chrissy to feel uncomfortable. And while Cindy had never said much about the idea, she had never come right out and said that it would be okay, either.

The flower shop was slow that day and Janet found little distraction to replace the worries that flashed inside of her. She leaned on the counter as she waited for Jack to pick her up for lunch, the ritual on Wednesday afternoons. She rested her head in one hand while she twirled a rose that had been lying there in the other. Finally she heard the bell on the door jingle and looked up to find Jack walking in with his usual goofy grin.

“Hey babe, ready to go?”

“Yes, I’m starved!” she said as she headed to the back room to grab her purse.

“I asked Terri to come, but I guess she was too busy at the hospital,” Jack said as Janet returned.

Janet frowned. “The hours that girl puts in,” she sighed. She stopped for a moment as she let out a chuckle.

“What’s so funny?” he asked.

“Nothing it’s just…just something Terri said last night.”

Janet stopped her explanation there with a smile remaining on her face as Jack continued to look at her, waiting for her to continue. Almost laughing at Janet’s amusement himself he said, “Well, what did she say?”

“Oh, nothing,” she said, hoping he wouldn’t inquire any further. “You had to have been there sort of thing,” she said, and let out another chuckle.

“Well now you have to tell me.”

Janet paused at that point, now wishing she hadn’t said anything, but quickly rambled, “Oh, just something silly about if you and I had anything going on she’d be fine with it. Gosh, I’m so hungry I could eat a horse. Where did you want to go?” She said trying to quickly overlap what she had said as she walked out the door with a confused Jack following closely behind.

“Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,” Jack repeated as they began to make their way down the sidewalk and past the bustle of the city, the sounds of horns and the conversations of others trumpeting around them. Almost about to laugh as if Terri’s words were a joke, he went on, “You mean she actually said that?”

“Well yeah, she did. I was a bit shocked myself.”

“I’ll say,” he said a bit stunned. “It doesn’t sound like something a typical woman would say. Most women get stark raving mad when they see another woman touch me.” Jack made a mock smug face and began to walk with a macho effect.

“You are unbelievable!” Janet said, genuinely angered by his words.

“Unbelievably sexy,” he smirked, continuing to walk the same way. “But it is true,” he said, partially referring to Janet’s own actions as a result of jealousy the previous night.

A nearby car honked and startled Janet, only aggravating her more. “Let’s just not discuss this right now, okay?”

“Not discuss what?” Jack said, not realizing the extent of what was going through her mind and still set on his jokes.

“I-I don’t know,” she replied. “Nothing.”

Now Jack was confused. Janet had always been a bit touchy and worrisome, but he had begun to notice it more and more lately.

Why? Because you’re driving me insane! Janet thought as she looked at Jack, reading his questioning expression. It was always a joke with him…jokes that always led to confusion. But she knew that a part of it was her own fault. She was smarter than that, she was stronger than that, to let things get to her. This had all been going on for too long, this inner struggle. She found herself mostly upset that Jack himself seemed to not even acknowledge that any such struggle existed. It was as if he didn’t realize anything was going on. She stared at the street sign until it allowed the pedestrians to walk and then looked down. But who was she kidding? Literally speaking, there was nothing going on after all.

Making their way across the street, Jack grabbed Janet’s hand and held onto it tightly regardless of the tension he sensed. He looked over at her, looking quizzically into her eyes and looking back up when she did not return his gaze. Once they had reached the other side of the street he began, “I just need to get this straight.”

“What?”

“Basically you’re telling me that I could have my way with you and Terri wouldn’t mind?”

Janet was amused at his straightforward ridiculousness, but covered up a forming smile with an angered expression. “Eat your heart out. I never told you that you could have your way with me!”

“But hypothetically…”

“You are ridiculous, Jack!” Janet laughed as they walked hand in hand to the restaurant. No matter how hard she tried, it was impossible to stay mad at him. She hated that effect he had over her.

Jack, too, laughed as they continued making their way down the sidewalk. Once the laughter had subsided his thoughts began to wander. Perhaps it was because Terri wasn’t used to the living arrangement that she suggested she didn’t care about the possibility of a romantic relationship between the other two roommates. Perhaps she really just didn’t care. But if that were the case, if Terri hadn’t even flinched at suggesting the idea, why was Janet so strikingly different in her opinions of such a possibility? Why did it matter so much to her?

He looked over Janet as she let out a sigh, her thoughts appearing to be in the clouds. If only he could get inside her head. If only he knew what she was thinking.

[*Pleasant Tomorrow*]

Chapter 10: May I Have This Dance?

November 1981

Jack felt the wetness of Janet’s tears upon his neck as he held her close, slowly swaying to the music but barely noticing it was even there. Her sobs softened as the song faded to an end, but that didn’t stop them from moving. They said nothing as she rested her head on his shoulder, not wanting to look up.

He knew Janet hated to show her vulnerable side…that she hated not being in control. He knew she hated to cry. He knew that about her, and so he said nothing. Hugging her close, all he could think to do was to softly sing as he provided the words to the song they were dancing to.

“Time we’ve learned to sail above…time won’t change the meaning of one love, ageless and ever, evergreen.”

She was the one to stop. Wiping away her tears, she finally looked up at him. Whether or not she had intended them to, her eyes conveyed such yearning and longing as she looked into his. She had never respected him-never loved him-more than she did at that moment. She knew she had doubted his intentions far too often and yet, in the end, he was always there for her. He was always on her side.

“I’m sorry I didn’t believe you,” she whimpered, barely able to make out the words as the tears began to form again.

“I’m sorry I was right,” he said, still staring into her eyes. He hated to see her in such pain, with her dreams of becoming a dancer crushed by this Michael, this pervert…it had taken every fiber of Jack’s being to spare him when he saw him coming on to Janet. And he knew that the only thing that had stopped him was the need to get to Janet and to comfort her.

Janet backed away not sure what to do next. She turned around and absentmindedly ran her hand across the radio as her thoughts made everything around her disappear. Everything but Jack. He looked at her, concerned but not sure what to say.

Gazing up she saw a sign posted to the wall in front of her. “Not responsible for lost items,” it read. She could have laughed at the irony if she weren’t too busy crying. She had lost her dream. Without turning back around she began, “It’d been my dream since I was a little girl. I remember moving furniture out of the way in our living room, sometimes forcing my brother to dance with me and be Fred Astaire while I was Ginger Rogers. Then my father would see what I did to the furniture and he’d yell and yell…” She finally cracked a smile at the memories, whilst she simultaneously wiped a tear away. “I took so many classes as a kid and then I…I don’t know, I just gave up. My parents always said it wasn’t a realistic goal. But then Michael, he made me feel confident about my passion again. He gave me hope.” She stopped again and then looked over at Jack. “And then he took it right back.”

“You can’t let him take that away from you,” Jack began.

“Oh Jack, why shouldn’t I? After all, I’m not really that great of a dancer anyway.”

“Hey,” he said, walking closer to her. “You’re a wonderful dancer. You tore up that whole stage at the show the other day.”

“Yeah, because I was tripping all over it,” she finally joked.

“Only once or twice.”

“Three times.”

They both managed to smile at her keeping count, unknowingly mimicking what Mr. Furley had said after the show the other day.

“As a kid I wasn’t exactly getting the best parts. I tried my darndest, Jack, but I was never a particularly wonderful dancer. It was Michael that made me feel like I was.”

“But Janet, you don’t need him to feel wonderful. You don’t need anyone but yourself for that.”

She looked up at him. Never before had she heard such wise words spoken from his mouth. The sincerity made her want to lean up and kiss him…kiss him for always being there for her, kiss him for comforting her when she needed it the most, kiss him for the love that she felt radiating from him.

But she didn’t.

Nodding, she acknowledged that he was right. She then stood there, looking down, still unable to urge herself to move from the spot that she was in. Suddenly, she felt him grab her arm and her body move forward as he pulled her closer to him again. The next thing she knew, his lips were on hers, if only for a short moment. Breaking away, their faces still close to one another, his eyes penetrating hers, he whispered, “I love you, Janet. And I’ll always be here for you.”

The words that fell from his lips came as a bit of a surprise to Jack. Of course he loved her, for she was his best friend. Yet the way he had said them, how they had just flowed out without him really thinking, shocked him and caused him to wonder in just what way he meant them.

Janet closed her eyes. She knew Jack, and she knew the love that he was expressing was a love of friendship and of deep concern and respect. But perhaps if she closed her eyes, perhaps if she imagined it differently, it might seem as though he had meant it another way.

Her eyes were still closed as she whispered back, “I love you too, Jack. And thank you.”

[janet42]

Great job on the story!

[*Pleasant Tomorrow*]

^^thanks!

Chapter 11: The Wrong Girl

February 1982

“Damned doorknob,” Terri muttered as she wiggled the loose handle with one hand while balancing a bag of groceries with the other. Finally getting the lock to unlatch, she pushed the door open with her foot and staggered inside, where she found Janet sitting on the sofa attempting to do paperwork for the flower shop, but failing as she stared absentmindedly ahead.

“Hey Janet,” she said. When Janet didn’t respond, Terri set the groceries down on the table and made her way over to the sofa to get a better look at Janet’s face. “Janet?” She snapped her fingers in front of Janet’s face, who proceed to jump and then look up at her friend.

“What’d you do that for?” She asked with a confused expression on her face.

“How else was I going to get you out of your trance?” Terri sighed and sat down next to Janet. “Look, Janet, I’m just as worried about him as you are, but for God sakes you can’t let it consume you!”

“Consume me? I’m not! Look at all of the work I got done,” Janet retorted, looking down at her paper work, which included various doodles and random words. She looked up at Terri and timidly smiled, embarrassed.

Deciding to be easy on Janet, Terri ignored what she saw and went on, “I just wish Jack wasn’t so darn stupid.”

“I don’t think he’s stupid, Terri, so much as he’s…he’s just so blind.”

Terri looked over at Janet, whose face appeared to be consumed by genuine confusion, annoyance, and hurt. Terri herself looked down, trying to contemplate the situation. From the day she’d first met her two roommates, she’d sensed a complicated history. For a time she’d even thought that Jack and Janet were romantically involved. And she hadn’t minded the idea; it seemed to make sense. And even when she found out that there was nothing actually going on between the two, she never doubted for a moment that feelings were there, whether or not each of them realized it.

She looked over at Janet again who had gotten up to put the groceries away. Something told her that Janet realized it more than Jack did. Jack, who was engaged to a woman he’d only known for little over a week- a woman it seemed he could hardly love after she forced him to change his demeanor, his life, and his career. Terri couldn’t stand Denise, and there was no doubt that Janet couldn’t either.

She got up and made her way to the kitchen and began to help. “Janet?”

“Yeah, Ter?”

“Has Jack always been this way?”

“Been what way?”

“Well, you know…the type that goes absolutely gaga for someone they barely know, and falls head over heels for someone who’s absolutely horrible for them?”

Janet stopped. “Well more than anything he’s just always really been your average lady’s man, chasing after any pretty young thing he could find. But to the degree he’s been with Denise…it’s something completely new. It’s not like him, Terri.”

“I didn’t think so…” Pausing for a moment, she began again, “Janet, can I ask you something?”

“Sure Terri, go right ahead.”

“Do you…I mean, have you ever…regarding the way you feel about him…”

“Regarding the way I feel about who? What are you trying to say, Terri?” Janet asked, slightly amused as Terri stumbled through her words.

Terri paused, afraid to continue asking what she really wanted to know; did Janet really have feelings for Jack?

“Terri?” Janet chuckled.

Terri simply smiled blankly at her friend. “Uh…it’d be ‘whom.’”

“What?”

“Regarding the way you feel about ‘whom’, not ‘who.’”

“Terri, will you quit dodging the point? What are you trying to say?”

Just as Terri opened her mouth and was about to speak, Jack burst into the kitchen singing. “And I’ll send all my loving to you,” he droned as he grabbed Terri and spun her around, her expression startled and slightly annoyed. He pointed at Janet as he held Terri. “You’re next Janet.” He then sighed dreamily. “Isn’t Denise wonderful?”

Janet clenched her fists in anger trying to stop herself from screaming and walked out of the kitchen rolling her eyes.

“What’s her problem?” Jack asked Terri.

Pulling away from Jack, she angrily stared him in the eye. “Nothing, Jack. Everything is just fine and dandy,” she replied sarcastically before she too left the kitchen, leaving a confused Jack behind.


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When the girls had decided to talk to Jack about Denise once and for all, Janet had assumed she and Terri would do so together. But Terri had different plans. It wasn’t that Terri was afraid to talk to Jack about the situation-quite the contrary. She loved putting people in their places. But when she saw the nervous look on Janet’s face, she couldn’t resist. She knew that it was Janet that needed to tell him Denise was the wrong girl for him, because she felt that Janet was quite possibly the right one. Instead of walking into Jack’s bedroom with her, she pushed Janet into his room and closed the door, and put her ear up against it to listen.


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Jack was heartbroken when he finally realized what Denise had been doing to him. He had truly believed that she was the one. He made his way over to the sofa, slumped down, and put his head in his hands. He had cancelled the honeymoon, and that meant that it was real-it was over now.

Janet and Terri walked over and sat down on either side of him, Terri hugging him as Janet rubbed his arm to comfort him.

“You sure you’re gonna be okay?” Janet asked.

Looking up, Jack forced a smile. “Yeah,” he said. “I guess I’m mostly just bothered by the fact that I allowed myself to be so blind.”

“Well, we’re glad you can see now,” Terri said, feeling as though she had used the term loosely. He didn’t quite see everything yet. Not quite sure why, but yet wanting to leave Jack and Janet alone, Terri got up and headed toward the kitchen. “I’m going to go make some coffee,” she said and disappeared.

Janet looked up at Jack trying to read him. He didn’t move as she entwined her fingers with his. Looking over at her, this time his smile, though slight, was genuine. And then he laughed.

Startled, Janet asked, “What’s so funny?”

“How could I have been so stupid?” he blurted.

“Oh, it’s not that shocking,” Janet cracked, and then cowered as Jack playfully attempted to hit her with a pillow. “Hey, no hitting! We helped saved your life, remember?”

Pulling back, he replied, “You sure did…I guess I’m just not that good at it.”

“Not that good at what?”

“Love.”

There was a pause. Hearing the word ‘love’ come from his lips while she sat so close to him caused her heart to race a bit. Before the silence grew awkward, he spoke again.

“Janet, I was so sure that I loved her…that I was in love with her, but I was so wrong.” He looked over at her and shrugged. “I guess I’m not that good at figuring out what love really is.”

His words made Janet afraid to say anything for fear that something might slip, just as she had almost let what she felt for him slip earlier in his bedroom as she told him how wrong Denise was for him. She’d been terrified after Terri pushed her into the room to face Jack alone, blurting out how everything was wrong, how he was marrying the wrong girl…and she was almost sure that she would have said more if he didn’t accuse her of being jealous that he was getting married and she wasn’t.

Breaking out of her reverie, she finally spoke. “Jack I, um…I think you got very lucky.”

“I’ll say.”

“Well I mean, look at it as a learning experience. Now when the right girl comes along you’ll know what to look for.” She scolded herself. ‘Comes along?’ her mind shrieked. ‘But I’m right here.’

Jack pulled Janet in for a hug and suddenly realized how guilty he felt for accusing her of being jealous of him. He knew that Janet could be a rather jealous person sometimes, but he also knew that the size of her heart would never allow jealousy to come in the way of a friend’s happiness. And even though she had tried, her criticizing his engagement to Denise was not what opened his eyes about his former fiancé; it was when Denise put down two of the people he cared about most that he finally saw what kind of person she was. As much as he joked about it, to hear somebody seriously accuse him of fooling around with Janet or Terri sickened him-to think that he’d ever treat either of them that way.

He sighed and rested his head on Janet’s, which now rested on his shoulder. The sincerity in her opinion of his engagement now sunk in; she knew more about him than he knew about himself. He only wished it weren’t so hard for him to see love himself and to know when a woman was right for him and when she was not. Perhaps that’s why he chased so many women that truly meant nothing to him; it was easier that way because that way he couldn’t be wrong.

But most of all, he wondered why Denise suddenly changed that way of thinking in him and caused him to want to settle down. He assumed maybe it was her controlling demeanor that wouldn’t allow him to think otherwise. But it didn’t matter to him now, he told himself. Now when the right person came along, he’d be able to see it for himself.

[*Pleasant Tomorrow*]

Chapter 12: I Never Realized How Lovely You Are

May 1982

Recovering from his fall, Jack assured the girls that he was not listening in on their conversation. He told them that he was simply leaning on the door as he stretched his legs. “It’s a nice night for a run. Do either of you girls want to go for a run?” He pathetically inquired.

Still trying to regain her composure after breaking down with laughter, Janet’s glowing eyes looked up at Jack as she tried to stifle another giggle. Only moments before Janet had recalled her “computer date” with Jack to Terri, both girls knowing full well that Jack was listening in on their conversation on the other side of the door. She had jokingly told Terri that she could see herself falling for Jack before Terri opened the door and Jack literally did fall.

“Oh, trying to run off all of that hot steam from our date?” Janet joked, as she and Terri both broke down again. Jack shrugged and forced an awkward smile. Regaining herself once more, Janet went on, “I’m sorry Jack. I’m sorry…we just couldn’t resist.”

“Oh well aren’t you two just a couple of comedians? A regular Lucille Ball and Carol Burnett,” he sarcastically quipped back, even though he couldn’t help but let their laughter rub off on him. Pausing for a moment, he grabbed Terri’s pillow and leaped on the bed, and playfully hit Janet with it. After a startled shriek, she grabbed her own and hit him back. Terri chuckled as she snuck into the living room to grab another from the sofa before she started to hit them both and an all out pillow war ensued.

After a minute or two it subsided, and Jack fell on the floor in defeat as Janet hit him one more time. “I’ll claim that as a victory,” she said, looking down at him as he dramatically played dead.

Terri nudged him with her foot. “Now get up. I want to go to bed.”

Jack opened one eye and smiled slyly. “I thought you’d never ask,” he said, and Terri kicked him even harder before he got up and jokingly moped out of the room, turning around by the door to say ‘goodnight.’

“And Janet? If you let me re-do that kiss maybe I’ll forget about your share of the bill.”

“Oh Jack!” Janet yelled, and threw a pillow at him, which he blocked by shutting the door.

Alone on the other side of the door Jack chuckled as he made his way to his room. But he was afraid to be alone all of a sudden-afraid that certain thoughts would make their way to the surface now that there was no one there to distract him from them. He didn’t understand why that for the past few hours his heart had been beating faster and louder than he had ever remembered. Of course, the falling and hitting didn’t help matters, but even now that the rough play was over, his heart beat didn’t seem to slow down at all. Not one bit…and it scared him.

To think that a machine-a computer with its wires and hard drives and whatever else it was made out of, with its solid logic and lack of a heart-would know anything about love didn’t quite make sense even to him, who knew fairly little himself. But yet it had managed, somehow, to bring someone to him that he never in a million years would have ever thought…and yet standing here alone now, as thoughts, feelings, heart beats raced, he couldn’t help but think that it made at least some sense…for him to be paired with her-with Janet.

He could still hear the girls giggling and talking in the other room as he changed into his pajamas, a faint yet troubled smile still remaining on his face. All his life, after any successful date with a woman, he went home beaming and giddy. He stood there now puzzled and afraid.

Jack was no fool. He was merely stubborn and fearful of anything out of the ordinary. He was aware of what he felt, what he was now sure he had felt for some time, but he was so set in his ways that it hadn’t been hard for him to deny it all to himself. And he did, until it was made so blatantly obvious that he couldn’t any longer.

On that date, he was hypnotized once more by her dark, sparkling eyes. Once again they stole away his petty logic and allowed his heart to reign, if only for the moment that he had told her how lovely she was…

But this time his logic was so utterly damaged that it didn’t bounce back. He couldn’t deny what he felt now, at least not to himself-for suddenly he was able to understand a bit better what true love was. He’d had to have been hit on the head for him to actually realize it, but he did nonetheless. Love wasn’t just a giddy feeling, a beaming smile, or not being able to stop thinking about someone. It wasn’t happy or sad or up and down. There was no cut and dry with love; it was something that reached inside of a person and mixed everything around, caused someone to deny it when it was there and believe in it when it wasn’t, and made everything backwards and forwards at the same time. It tapped someone on the shoulder and hid while the person tried to figure out what had just hit him. It hugged you, embraced you, and smiled at you while it teased you and tormented you at the same time.

His head was spinning. He laid down on his bed, positive he would never be able to fall asleep as every moment of the date repeated in his head. And hours later, as his eyes finally began to get heavy, the last things on his mind before he fell asleep were her eyes.


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Attempting to simultaneously walk and put his pants on, Jack hopped over to the ringing phone, nearly tripping as he made his way over the single step. “Hello?” he huffed into the phone out of breath as he went to button his pants. The sleepless night had caused him to get up a bit later than he had hoped to-one in the afternoon to be exact-and he was doing his best to look presentable before anyone saw him.

“Jack?” He heard on the other end.

“Yeah…who’s this?”

“It’s me, Joan! Joan Ferguson!” The woman said. It was the old friend of Jack and Janet’s that, along with her husband, had suggested computer dating.

“Joanie! It’s nice to hear from you again!”

“Well, Jack, I just had to call. Tom and I were dying to know if you tried out the computer dating service that we suggested.”

Jack paused, afraid to admit that he had after he had put computer dating down the other night. He then went on, “Well as a matter of fact…I did.”

“You did! Oh Jack, how was it? How was she?”

“She, uh, she was something else,” he said with an amused smile on his face, half serious and half referring to his surprise at who his date ended up being.

“Are you going to be seeing her again?”

“Oh, yeah, I think I’ll be seeing quite a bit of her,” Jack joked just as Janet entered the apartment.

“That’s wonderful! Gee, I am just so happy for you Jack. It really is a wonderful thing, this computer dating. Tom and I meant it when we said it gives you exactly what you want.”

Jack grew a bit more serious as the expression on his face changed and he replied, “Yeah. Yeah, it sure does.”

After exchanging their goodbyes, Jack hung up the phone. Janet had since walked into her room, and as soon as Jack hung up she walked out again. “Who was that?” She asked.

“It was Joan. She wanted to know if I went through with the computer dating thing.”

Janet made a face. “Oh, no, you didn’t tell her did you?”

“Well sure I did. What’s the big deal?”

Janet suddenly got a bit fidgety and nervous. She didn’t know what was wrong with herself. For all that she felt for Jack, when she was actually set up on a date with him she had been terrified-terrified enough to be upset the moment she saw that it was Jack who would be her date, terrified enough to assure Jack that the date meant nothing, and terrified enough to laugh it all off with Terri. For all the time that she had hoped for a date with Jack, when it became an actuality, she pushed away. Certainly Janet had always been a logical person…but when it came to matters of the heart, all logic disappeared along with normal heart rates and steady breathing. Finally finding words, she replied to Jack, “I, uh…I guess it’s just a bit embarrassing, that’s all.”

“That’s what I don’t get, Janet. What’s so embarrassing about it? You said the same thing yesterday,” Jack said trying to hide the fact that he was a bit hurt.

“Well it’s just that…” but she was cut off as Terri entered the apartment followed by an inquisitive Mr. Furley. She was relieved, for she wasn’t quite sure how she was going to finish the rest of that sentence anyhow.

“Yeah, Larry told me all about it,” Mr. Furley said with a sly smirk on his face. He turned to Jack and Janet as he let out an airy chuckle. “Have fun on your ‘date’ last night, kids?” He asked.

Janet’s eyes grew wide at the realization that yet another person knew about the date and, of all people, it was Mr. Furley.

“Larry and his big mouth,” Terri sighed looking at the two of them.

Stuttering, Jack began, “H-h-h-h-he told you it was all set up by a computer, didn’t he? I mean of course I had never intended to…with Janet!”

Still sniffling, Mr. Furley replied, “You don’t have to explain anything to me, Jack. I just would have loved to see the look on your face when a woman showed up as your date. You must have been horrified!”

Jack forced an unappreciative smile and then went into “character” as he nudged up to Mr. Furley. “I felt so dirty, Mr. Furley! Comfort me!”

“Oh no you don’t!” Mr. Furley shouted, his silly mood quickly shifting to that of discomfort. “Y-you’re not gonna get any sympathy from me! No sir! Any guy would be lucky to take that woman out on a date! I’ll never understand you, Jack. Two beautiful women and you cry about it!” And with that he went jittering out of the apartment.

The three laughed as Terri shut the door behind him. “You know, that never gets old,” Jack laughed.

“But that Larry! Who does he think he is blabbing these things to Furley? If he weren’t so dense we’d all be out on the streets right now!” Janet said.

“Yeah, what a rotten thing to do,” Jack sighed.

Terri sighed as well. “Problem with Larry is he’s just as dense as Furley is. Sometimes I’d like to smack that man…but instead, I’m going to shower.” And she skipped to the bathroom leaving Jack and Janet alone once more.

Jack’s eyes found Janet’s for a brief moment, but he had lost his words. Forcing the faintest hint of a smile, he said “I think I’m gonna head down to the Beagle.”

“Okay,” was all that Janet could say back, and he walked out of the apartment.

As soon as the door was shut, she closed her eyes and clenched her fists as she let out a sigh. Why was she suddenly so afraid? Everything that had worried her about Jack before was rising to the surface.

Opening her eyes again, she made her way over to the sofa and sat down. She thought she had done such a good job forcing the way she felt about Jack to the back of her mind. There were plenty of dates and she was having fun and everything was fine…and then this. Now that it had been there right in front of her, the whole idea of her and Jack right out in the open, she felt frozen-more terrified of the idea than she had ever been.

The thing was that when she had come close to it, even if it wasn’t serious, she couldn’t help but be reminded of the first time she met Jack and how different he made her feel. It was almost as if he were dangerous to her, and yet so perfect at the same time. His kind, dancing eyes, laid back sense of humor, and charming nature were woven into a goofy, immature playboy.

And the rule. There was that damned rule. That very same rule that she had created herself. Never, under any circumstances, were either of the girls ever to become involved romantically with Jack. It was the same rule that she loathed with all of her heart, that she wanted to throw out the window, drown in a river, and get hit by a truck. It was the very same rule that she knew should be honored out of respect for the third roommate and that she knew she could never break as long as Terri was around. And she wanted Terri around.

But worst of all, the strongest thing against what she felt for Jack was that whether or not he had ever had feelings for her, or did now…she believed that he could never truly love her. She wasn’t truly sure if Jack could ever just settle and love one woman.

But she couldn’t always be right.


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Terri was a bit more shocked that she would have expected when she had overheard Jack and Janet talking about their date the other night. Shocked not because it made her feel uncomfortable, but because she had felt that Jack and Janet didn’t trust her enough to tell her if there was something going on. It was enough to nearly drive her to tears when she had learned that Larry knew before her.

But none of it had mattered anyhow, because each had revealed to her that it was set up, with Janet looking particularly embarrassed.

She walked out of the bathroom as she hand dried her hair with a towel and found Janet sitting on the sofa reading. To see such stubborn and aloof roommates drove her a bit crazy, but as long as neither of them said anything, she vowed that she wouldn’t either.

“Where’d Jack go?” She asked.

“Oh, down to the Beagle,” Janet replied without looking up from her book.

“Oh. Why didn’t you go with him?”

Janet put the book down and shrugged. “I don’t know. He didn’t ask me to. Besides, I’m just not really in the mood for…” Pausing, she sighed. “I guess I’ve just felt a little awkward since that silly date.” She looked embarrassed as she looked over at Terri.

Keeping true to her vow, Terri said nothing about her perceptive knowledge of her roommates’ feelings. Instead, she said, “Oh, you shouldn’t worry about that. It’s just Jack. Besides, it’s all done and over with now.”

Janet nodded. “Yeah, I suppose you’re right. What’s done is done.”

“Exactly. Now why don’t you go down there and have a beer? I was thinking about going myself anyway after I’m done getting ready.”

“Oh, well I can wait…”

“No!” Terri shrieked a bit louder than she had intended to. “I mean, nah, I’ll be a little while,” she said, for she had no intention of actually showing up.

“Okay,” Janet said hesitatingly, a bit suspicious but not sure why. “See you later.”

“Bye!” Terri smiled.

As she walked into the pub, Janet’s eyes fell on Jack who was mingling with a red head. She almost turned to leave but willed herself to take a seat at the bar and order a beer. Slouching with her head in her hands and staring off into space, she finally heard the clicking heels of the red head behind her as she stormed out. She turned around and saw Jack beside her as he asked the bartender for a towel.

“Hey, when did you get here?” Jack asked her.

“Just a minute ago.” She looked at Jack and noticed that beer was running down his hair and onto his shirt. “I knew we should’ve never upgraded you from the sippy cup,” she quipped.

“Ha ha, very funny,” Jack said as he took the towel and began to wipe himself down.

“Girl get angry at you again?” She asked.

“Mmhm. And all because I told her that she had very nice thighs-I mean eyes! There, I did it again.”

“Ugh, Jack,” Janet laughed.

“It’s not funny, this happens at least once a week!”

“Well maybe you should get your mind out of the gutter for once.”

Jack smiled and sat down beside her. “My mind was off in other places, but not the places you’re thinking of, smarty pants.”

“Where then?”

Jack was about to speak when he remembered that any mention of their date in front of other people embarrassed her. He went on, “Let’s leave. We can talk about it on the way home.”

“I was supposed to meet Terri here.”

“I don’t think she’ll mind,” he said, aware that a guy Terri was interested in had just walked in.

As they began walking back, Janet couldn’t help but notice that Jack was a bit on edge. She herself wasn’t feeling completely composed. He said nothing until they reached a bench near the apartment complex and sat down. Staring off in front of him for a bit, Jack finally turned to look at her, her inquisitive eyes waiting for him to say something.

“I, um…I can’t get this whole thing off of my mind, Janet,” he said.

“What thing?” She said, knowing but wanting to hear it from him.

“The date. I wasn’t exactly prepared for something like that.”

“Yeah, I know. Neither was I.”

Jack’s eyes seemed to go back and forth between looking into Janet’s eyes and looking distant, focused inward on his own thoughts, for so many of them flashed through his mind. He wanted to ask her if she felt it too. He wanted to know if this was driving her as crazy as it was him. But to reveal such things was to take a risk he wasn’t ready for.

“I wasn’t that horrible of a date, was I?” He asked with a half-hearted smile on his face, half joking and half serious.

Janet looked into his eyes and smiled. It was just like him, she thought, to worry about such things as how good of a date he was. That was all that he had to say. That was all that was bothering him. She was sure of it.

“Oh, Jack, you weren’t horrible at all. Any girl would be lucky to go on a date with you.”

“Any girl but you?”

“No. No, Jack, I was very lucky to go on a date with you.” Her smile was endearing. She treated his question as if it were merely one to support his ego. But she did mean it, surely more than he could tell.

“Then why does it seem to embarrass you so much? I felt just as silly as you, Janet, but I at least tried to have fun. You were worried the whole time.”

At Jack’s words, Janet started to feel tense and became defensive. How could he say that? She did have fun, she did…as much fun as she could have for being as terrified as she was.

“Oh Jack, don’t say that. I told you I had fun. I had a lot of fun. But you had to expect that I should feel a bit strange. It’s not like we had done anything like that before.”

He backed down. He knew she was right because he had been just as terrified as she was. Never had it been so difficult for him to kiss someone before in his life. Finally he knew what to say to close the issue. Looking over at her, he smiled, “What do you say we re-do that kiss and then put this all behind us?”

Re-do the kiss? What was he thinking? Was he trying to making everything even more uncomfortable? Still prying on her for the check? “Oh Jack, you’re unbelievable! You agreed to pay the bill that night and-

Jack finally laughed, remembering his joke from the other night. “No, Janet,” he said, reaching over to her to make her look at him again. “Just for closure’s sake. Besides, we didn’t quite get the kiss right the first time, did we?”

Janet thought he was insane at that moment, sure that deep down his ultimate goal was to destroy her. Who was he to ask her for a kiss and to make this all the harder for her? But in her whorl-wind of emotions her lips refused to move and her eyes froze on his, only allowing her to lower them to focus on his lips.

“You’re insane,” she finally managed to whisper, barely enough for him to hear for her hearting was beating so strongly with desire that she had little energy to raise her voice any louder.

“I know,” he said equally as quiet, a faint smile forming on his lips as he lifted her chin up and kissed her.

[Number 9 Dream]

Hey, I just wanted to leave a comment on your writing. I've only read the first few chapters so far (but will read more when I get home from work!) and I just wanted to say that this is amazing! I love how you portray the characters, and the dialogue is so good; very smart and funny. I also love the little details about Jack's character, like how he's afraid he won't be able to measure up to a smart, strong woman, which is why he continually pursues floozies. That's a really good, creative way to describe Jack's character, one facet I'd never given much thought to but it really makes sense. Good job on a well-written fic. I'll continue with my reading soon!

[*Pleasant Tomorrow*]

Thank you so much! I really appreciate it. I haven't been posting the newer chapters on here because I wasn't sure if anyone was reading it, but I have been updating on fanfiction.net. I'll post the new ones here later.