The Masked Bagger Novelization (a work in progress)

[Adamantium]

This thread is no longer the Masked Bagger Novelization. I don't know what I'll turn it into, but until I decide, enjoy re-reading the first issue of Masked Bagger!

ISSUE #1. Transfer to 717

Originally Released on February 13th, 2013

The Story Begins…

The Masked Bagger is sitting in a gigantic bird’s nest, high up in the sky above Kroger 717. He looks defeated. He takes out his camcorder and pushes record.

Masked Bagger: I’m The Masked Bagger. Although I guess by the time you’re watching this video, I *was* The Masked Bagger. I don’t see any way out of this situation. I imagine I’ll die up here, but I don’t want to die without telling my story… the story of how I became The Masked Bagger. To start off (pause) I’m not from this Earth. It’s been explained to me that there are five different levels of Earth. I merely come from one of them. Incidentally, it’s the boring one. You see, it all started when I was outside my Kroger store, sweeping the sidewalk. Suddenly, there was a loud crash. I looked over and noticed a briefcase that wasn’t there before. I opened it up. There was a DVD inside.

CUT TO: Adam Hauck is inside his house. He puts the DVD inside the player and sits down. Professor Tincher appears on the screen.

Professor Tincher: If you’re watching this… we need your help. I work for Kroger store 717. It’s um, on a different Earth, so your travel arrangements will be quite unique.

The upcoming dialogue is narrated over scenes of Adam watching the video, packing his things for the move, and hugging his family and friends goodbye. He ends up at Kroger, in the manager’s office, and then vanishes.

Masked Bagger Narration: Professor Tincher seemed very convincing. He explained to me that I would be a superhero on this other Earth. I was skeptical at first, of course, as any normal human being would be. But, you know, it would be an adventure, and I was longing for adventure in my life. Besides, the supernatural evil has already found its way to four of the five different Earth levels. So by my coming here to fight, I would be protecting my Earth from the dangers that come with it. Anyways, back to the story. I returned to my Kroger store - as instructed - to be transported to this Earth level.

CUT TO: Kroger 717 - The Manager’s Office. Professor Tincher is standing in the room, looking straight ahead… at nothing. Suddenly, Adam Hauck appears out of thin air. The two men look at one another.

Professor Tincher: Adam Hauck, I presume.

Adam Hauck: Professor Tincher, hello.

They shake hands.

Professor Tincher: We have a lot of work to do, so let’s go downstairs to the basement of Kroger.

Adam Hauck: You guys have a basement? Neat-o.

They both exit the office.

CUT TO: The basement of Kroger 717. The Professor and his eager student walk down the steps, and end up at a laboratory.

Adam Hauck: I like it. So this is like my Bat-Cave?

Professor Tincher: Yes. Very much so. This is where I spend most of my time. Heck, I reside here. When the employees think I’ve gone home for the night, I actually go down here.

Adam Hauck: I don’t live down here, too? Do I?

Professor Tincher: No, no. I own a house across the street. You’ll live there - rent free.

Adam Hauck: Cool. Thanks.

Professor Tincher: It’s nothing.

Adam Hauck: So in the video, you said I’ll be a superhero. How’s that gonna work? What powers am I going to have?

Professor Tincher: Super strength.

Adam Hauck: Awesome! Because I’ve always been kind of a weakling.

Professor Tincher: Coming from the level of Earth you do, you have 17% more strength than the average person in this world. Hence, the super strength.

Adam Hauck: Wait, that’s it?

Professor Tincher: Yep. Don’t worry. I’ll train you how to fight, and you’ll be equipped with certain gizmos and gadgets to battle the bad guys.

Adam Hauck: Did I come all this way just to be Kroger security?

Professor Tincher: Adam, listen to me. This is the hot spot of evil for this world. That’s why we have this store. To contain it. The customers are the bait that keeps the evil here.

Adam Hauck: I’m sure they’d love to know *that*.

Professor Tincher: That’s why we’re in business. To keep the evil inside this building so it won’t escape, and spread like wildfire, consuming this world. There are a couple of super villains I’ve apprehended and imprisoned down here already, but I just barely survived both times. That’s when I knew I had to contact someone from your Earth level to be our guardian. The customers are just so sick and tired of dying while shopping here.

Adam Hauck: Then why do they shop here?

Professor Tincher: We have some really great sales.

CUT TO: Moments later. The Professor is standing by, waiting for Adam. Adam comes back into the room dressed in full Masked Bagger attire.

Adam Hauck: This is it? Just this little mask over my eyes?

Professor Tincher: That’s it. Pretty cool, huh?

Adam Hauck: My name is The Masked Bagger. I only bag as Adam, so The Masked Bagger isn’t even a bagger, and this is a dinky mask. If it’s in the name, shouldn’t the mask be more prominent?

Professor Tincher: Adam, please. You don’t want some big mask that’ll get you all sweaty. It’s much better this way.

Adam Hauck: But won’t everyone know it’s me?

Professor Tincher: You know how in comic books on your world, no one ever knows that Batman is Bruce Wayne, Peter Parker is Spider-Man, Dick Grayson is Robin, and most of all, no one knows that Clark Kent is Superman? All he does is TAKE OFF HIS GLASSES! People are quite clueless in the comics.

Adam Hauck: Sure, but those are comic books - stories of fiction.

Professor Tincher: The people of this world have the same mentality as the people in comic books on your world. Trust me. No one will know you’re The Masked Bagger unless you tell them.

Adam Hauck: So people in this world are all some percentage dumber than the people of my world?

Professor Tincher: In certain aspects yes. You and I are quite possibly the smartest people here.

Adam Hauck: Well see, now that’s just scary.

CUT TO: The front end of the store. Professor Tincher - known to the employees as “Mr. Tincher,” the store manager - introduces Adam (who is now wearing his regular Kroger clothes) to the two other baggers: Mickey Tork and Katie Collins.

Professor Tincher: Mickey, Katie, this is our newest bagger, Adam Hauck. Mickey, I’d like you to train him.

Mickey Tork: Sure thing, Mr. Tincher.

Tincher leaves.

Mickey Tork: So, Adam, how old are you?

Adam Hauck: I’m 31.

Katie Collins: And you’re a bagger? Shouldn’t you be a cashier, or work in another department… something? I mean DANG! You’re old for a bagger.

Adam Hauck: No, I’m content with this.

Adam notices how stunning Katie is. He’s instantly fallen for her. Which explains why he has trouble looking in her direction, and why he mainly focuses on Mickey. He’s shy.

Adam Hauck: So are you ready to train me?

Mickey Tork: Yes, but don’t get pushy. I was about to take my break, so I think I’ll do that first. Just stay by Katie’s side, and she’ll show you the ropes until I get back in twenty.

Adam Hauck: Aren’t breaks *fifteen* minutes?

He smiles at Katie as if by saying that, he’s impressing her. She’s not.

Mickey Tork: Are you a spy?

Adam Hauck: Huh?

Mickey Tork: Did Mr. Tincher hire you to spy on the baggers?

Adam Hauck: No.

Mickey Tork: Okay. Good. Then like I say, I’ll be back in twenty.

Mickey walks away. Adam turns to Katie. She smiles at him. It’s just a friendly smile, but it melts his heart.

Katie Collins: So Imma ‘bout to go outside and do carts. You can come with.

Adam Hauck: Oh, okay.

Adam stands there smiling at her nervously. She’s weirded out by it.

Katie Collins: Imma need you to stop smiling like a jackass, and get yo butt outside.

Adam Hauck: You talk like you’re from the streets. That’s so cute.

Katie Collins: You’re a weirdo.

CUT TO: Mickey is walking Adam around the store.

Mickey Tork: Listen, I’m sorry if I was kind of rude before. I just get grouchy when I’m hungry, and my break was already so late.

Adam Hauck: It’s okay. So, Mickey, what do you think about Katie Collins?

Mickey Tork: I love her. She’s a buddy of mine.

Adam Hauck: Just a “buddy”?

Mickey Tork: Yep. That’s all. I guess the real question is… what do *you* think about Katie Collins?

Adam Hauck: She’s cute, and seems to be really nice. Does she have a boyfriend?

Mickey Tork: Not at the moment, but I think there’s a guy she’s talking to.

Adam Hauck: Oh, well. I guess I should wait and see if I’m gonna stay here before I start to pursue her.

Mickey Tork: Why wouldn’t you stay here at the store?

Adam Hauck: “The store”? Yeah, that’s what I meant. Stay here… at the store.

Mickey Tork: Dude, are you suicidal?

Adam Hauck: Uh, no. I thought I was, but then I kept *not* killing myself, so I don’t think I could be considered suicidal.

Mickey Tork: Then what are you talking about?

Adam Hauck: Nothing. Now on with the training.

Mickey Tork: Okay, but if I spend today training you and then you just up and kill yourself tomorrow, I’m gonna be ticked. Day wasted.

Adam Hauck: Gotcha. I won’t kill myself - just for you.

Mickey Tork: Thank you. Now on with the training.

CUT TO: Professor Tincher is in his lab. Suddenly, an alarm goes off.

Professor Tincher: Uh-oh. The birds are loose!

CUT TO: Adam and Mickey in the produce department doing a price check. Vince Beckett is standing by the pineapples.

Mickey Tork: Watch out for this guy, Adam. His name is Vince Beckett. He’s the produce head. He’s a tool.

The two baggers approach Beckett.

Mickey Tork: Hey Vince, how much are the pineapples?

Vince Beckett: Who wants to know?

Mickey Tork: A customer. She claims they’re buy one get one free, but they don’t ring up that way.

Vince Beckett: Then, Mr. Tork, the customer is wrong. If you don’t believe that, then you’re saying I don’t know how to do my job and put the correct price in the computer. I know you wouldn’t dare say that, would you?

Mickey Tork: Um, no?

Vince Beckett: Very good.

Vince looks at Adam.

Vince Beckett: Hello, I’m Vince Beckett.

Adam Hauck: Adam Hauck. I’m new.

Vince Beckett: Seeing as I’ve been here seventeen years, and this is the first I’ve seen of you, I assumed you were new. You just wasted your voice by telling me that.

Adam Hauck: (loudly) Wow, you’re right Mickey. This guy IS a tool!

Mickey Tork: (nervous) Adam!

Vince Beckett: Why you little…

Suddenly - and interrupting Vince - gasps and screams from throughout the store are heard in the produce. Adam turns around and sees panicky people. He runs over to the bagger’s closet - where his Masked Bagger outfit is - and changes into the identity of the superhero where he’s about to go to action for the first time! People in the store look at the masked figure standing in front of the bagger’s closet. They’re amazed, even though they don’t know who he is.

Masked Bagger: Don’t panic people of the store. I am The Masked Bagger, Guardian of Kroger 717! I’ll protect you!

Suddenly a giant bird-man flies over to The Masked Bagger, and lands in front of him. Adam has a massive fear of birds, so seeing one as big as himself is naturally terrifying to him.

Masked Bagger: Gotta go!

Masked Bagger runs away as fast as he can, headed for the basement. Not exactly the debut he wanted, but once again, Adam lets fear control his actions.

CUT TO: The basement. Professor Tincher is down there, watching the store on a monitor. He’s expecting Adam. Adam - still in his Masked Bagger outfit - arrives.

Masked Bagger: You didn’t say anything about giant birds!

Professor Tincher: Bird phobia, eh?

Masked Bagger: Yes. Big time.

Professor Tincher: Face your fears. You have a job to do.

Masked Bagger: I can’t fight giant birds.

Professor Tincher: They are very easy to defeat. Just one punch and they’re dead.

Masked Bagger: That’s it? One punch?

Professor Tincher: Yes. They’re more of a nuisance than a threat. They have a giant nest up above the store. So every now and then they make their way inside and scare the customers.

Masked Bagger: So I punch them and suddenly there’s a bunch of dead bird bodies all over the place? That thought creeps me out, too.

Professor Tincher: No. Once they die, they vanish. It’s just that most people are so frightened of them, they don’t think to punch the birds. It’s not like we can have a sign on the door telling people to just punch the giant bird-men attacking them. Plus PETA is highly against even this conversation.

Masked Bagger: Tell me more about supernatural evil.

Professor Tincher: Supernatural evil comes in the form of “freak accidents” that turn regular people into super villains. There’s this legend of a Kroger Devil that causes these accidents. Now, I don’t know the complete origin of these birds, but they are all part of its evil plan. So what do you say? Get back to work?

Masked Bagger: I quit. You can send me home, right?

Professor Tincher: (sighs) I can, if that’s what you really want.

Masked Bagger: I can’t do this. I’m too scared. You don’t know this but I have a lot of fears. Plus I’m lazy. I have no motivation for anything. That’s always been the case. I was hoping it would be different with this, but I just don’t have the motivation I thought I would.

Professor Tincher: I’ll bet if your “Uncle Ben” was murdered, you’d find the motivation to fight crime!

Masked Bagger: Hey, don’t use my love of superhero origin stories to get me to stay!

Professor Tincher: Come on, Adam. The store needs you.

Masked Bagger: The store needs something a whole lot bigger than me.

They both pause for a moment.

Masked Bagger: I’m sorry. I’m just used to setting up jokes where someone hits me with a punch line like “There IS nothing bigger than you, fatty!” I’m outta here.

Adam begins to walk away.

Professor Tincher: If you walk, there is zero hope for this store. There is zero hope for Katie Collins!

Adam stops and turns around. He walks back to the Professor.

Professor Tincher: Yeah, I know you have a crush on her.

Masked Bagger: What can I do? I’m just a coward from another world.

Professor Tincher: If that’s all you were, you wouldn’t be here in the first place. You were chosen for this store for a reason.

Masked Bagger: And what’s the reason?

Professor Tincher: Um, well, the reason is to show how any random person can be a superhero with the proper training. I had a list of all the Kroger employees on your world, closed my eyes, and pointed to a name. I picked you.

Masked Bagger: (sarcastically) Well I’m certainly flattered.

Professor Tincher: You should be.

Masked Bagger: (sighs) I guess I have to try harder before I give up - this time. I always give up too easily. That’s why I never did anything with my life. My childhood dream was to be a superhero, and I’m talking about walking away from it. If I give up on this, there’s no hope for me at all.

Professor Tincher: (jokingly) Good. Make this all about YOU. Selfish.

Masked Bagger: Right, well anyways, I’m back in. Let’s do this. Some men fight their inner demons. I fight… giant bird-men. Somehow, I prefer the inner demons.

Professor Tincher: Alright. “The Masked Bagger”… take two!

CUT TO: The Masked Bagger is walking from the manager’s office - where the basement lab is underneath - headed for the front end of the store. There are plenty of the bird-men walking around the store. Some are even flying. The Masked Bagger approaches a bird-man.

Masked Bagger: Let’s see if the Professor was right.

Masked Bagger punches the evil bird-man in the face. It falls to the floor, and a couple seconds later, vanishes.

Masked Bagger: (he smiles) Son of a bleep. It works.

As The Masked Bagger makes his way to the front end, he punches a few more bird-men, killing them. One bird-man flies over him. As it does so, Masked Bagger jumps up and grabs both wings with each hand, then swings his arms down in front of him, causing the bird-man to hit the floor, head first. A couple seconds pass and it vanishes. Remember, these aren’t normal, everyday birds. These are evil creatures. So don’t feel sorry for them. Anyway, The Masked Bagger makes it to the front end of the store, and sees six bird-men surrounding Katie. She looks terrified. Masked Bagger approaches. He notices two 2-liters of Big K pop on a register, and gets an idea. He grabs both of the 2-liters.

Masked Bagger: Hey feathered freaks! Why don’t you peck on me? (he smiles) Get it? It’s like “pick on me” but because you’re birds, I changed it to “peck on me.” I’m funny.

No one laughs.

Masked Bagger: Okay, note to self… you won’t be a superhero that makes witty remarks.

All six bird-men walk over to Masked Bagger. They surround him: two in front of him, facing him; two behind him, and one bird-man on each side. Masked Bagger throws the pop bottle from his left hand up in the air, followed quickly by the one in his right. As he aims to punch the two bird-men in front of him, his elbows bash into the two bird-men behind him, causing them to fall over and vanish. His fists move forward at a fast pace as he punches the two in front of him. They also fall back and perish. Masked Bagger grabs the bird-man on his left by its shirt, and pulls it close by, where the Big K pop bottle lands on its head, killing it. He then grabs the last bird-man - on his right - and pulls him closer, where the other pop bottle falls and hits it on the head as well, causing its death. All six evil creatures have perished. Katie walks over to the superhero.

Masked Bagger: You’re safe now, Katie.

Katie Collins: How do you know my name? Who are you?

The Masked Bagger looks down for her name tag, so he can say “Your name tag says Katie.” However, she’s not wearing one.

Masked Bagger: Uh, I…

Just then, one of the giant birds swoops down and grabs Masked Bagger, and flies away with him. The bird-man flies outside of the building and drops Masked Bagger in a giant bird nest, high above the Kroger store.

Bird-Man#1: Stay here. When I return with my posse, we will KILL you!

The bird-man flies away.

Masked Bagger: These birds can talk!?! It just got real all up in here!

CUT TO: Back to The Masked Bagger making his farewell video.

Masked Bagger: And here I am. Just waiting to die. It’s funny how I can save others but not myself. It’s also funny how easily I give up. People of Kroger 717 need me and here I am sitting in a bird’s nest, defeated and feeling sorry for myself.

Masked Bagger looks down. It’s a long way down.

Masked Bagger: Either I die up here when the birds come back or I try to get down there and maybe I survive to protect the people of 717 from the evil that is sure to be headed their way. It’s a no-brainer. That’s got a double meaning too, because if I fall, my brain will be laying next to what’s left of my body, and so I’ll have no brain. Hence the term “no-brainer.” Yep, now I’m just stalling. Enough splattered-brain talk. Time to save the day!

Masked Bagger pushes the stop button on his camcorder, and puts it in his pocket. He takes his orange cart strap and hooks it to a secure part of the nest. He takes a deep breath and then jumps off the nest, holding onto the strap (obviously). He swings down to underneath the nest and grabs onto the pole, which the nest is sitting on. Masked Bagger yanks on the cart strap, and it lets go of the nest. He wraps it back around himself and slides down the pole. It’s a long way down but it’s the only option he has at the moment. After a couple minutes of sliding, The Masked Bagger finally makes it to the ground. The pole is right behind the Kroger building, so Masked Bagger runs around to the front of the outside of the store. There are bird-men out there, walking around and terrorizing people. The Masked Bagger gets his cart strap and swings it in the air a few times before aiming at a bird-man and landing a blow with it, causing it to fall over dead. Masked Bagger does that to a couple more bird-men, swinging the cart strap around and hitting them with it. He puts it away, and as if possessed by a Power Ranger, he punches and kicks these bird freaks on his way back into the store. There are still plenty of bird-men inside. The Masked Bagger decides to return to the basement. Not because he’s scared, but rather to see if the Professor has a plan.

CUT TO: The Masked Bagger enters the basement. Professor Tincher sees him.

Professor Tincher: Adam! You’re alive!

Masked Bagger: Don’t sound so surprised, Prof.

Professor Tincher: I’m sorry. I’m just happy.

Masked Bagger: So do you have any ideas? I’ve taken a bunch of these bird freaks out, but there’s still a lot more.

Professor Tincher: I have an idea. It’s time I introduce you to the Bagger-Mobile. It’s a cleaning cart that I’ve turned into a vehicle.

Masked Bagger: And this job just gets cooler as it goes along.

CUT TO: Katie is still on the front end. She looks over, towards the manager’s office, and sees Masked Bagger, driving the Bagger-Mobile, headed in her direction.

Katie Collins: Look everyone! It’s The Masked Bagger! He’s coming back! And he be drivin’!

Suddenly an applause fills the store as all the people clap at the return of their protector. The Bagger-Mobile continues to drive, until the masked hero stops by one of the birds, who is taunting a female customer.

Masked Bagger: Yippie-Ki-Yay, Mother-Feather!

Masked Bagger pushes a button and a giant Kroger bag is ejected from the vehicle. It covers the bird-man as if it was a large body bag, from head to claw. The hero then pulls a lever and a large toilet paper roll shoots out at such a fast speed that when it hits the bagged bird-man, it kills it. The bag drops to the floor. It’s occupant - dead and vanished. Masked Bagger continues driving. He drives around the whole store, ridding the building of these evil bird-men. In one case, a bird-man is flying by, and Masked Bagger ejects another large Kroger bag, capturing it in mid-air. This time, the bag stays attached to the vehicle and at our hero’s command, it starts to spin around. After a few speeding twirls, the bag separates from the Bagger-Mobile, sending the bird at a high speed into a wall, killing it on impact. The Masked Bagger gets to the bakery and looks down through the meat department, all the way to dairy. Bird-men are lined up, angry and waiting to take on the masked hero.

Masked Bagger: This better work.

Masked Bagger begins to speed towards the bird-men. He pushes a button in the vehicle, and a big metal shield covers the front of the Bagger-Mobile. He plows into these creatures, causing them to bounce off the metal shield and die. Masked Bagger has made it to the dairy and spins the vehicle around. He looks ahead at where all those bird-men were, and some are still alive. They avoided certain death somehow. The shield goes back down, and Masked Bagger steps on the gas, headed in their direction. This time he speeds by them shooting out enough Kroger bags to capture each of them. They can’t fly inside the bags, so they just lay on the floor, wriggling around. Masked Bagger stops his vehicle at the bakery department and gets out. He walks towards the evil bagged creatures and kicks each of them, instantly killing them. Once he’s finished, The Masked Bagger walks back to the Bagger-Mobile and drives off, looking for more. Once he gets to the front end, he realizes that they’re all gone. At least for now. He gets out of the car to a crowd, who again, applaud their hero.

Masked Bagger: Thank you. Seriously, thanks, everyone. Strange, evil things will occur in this store, like they have for a while now. But don’t worry. I’m here to protect you all. To the customers: continue to shop here. We have great prices, and I never get a day off, so I’ll always be here for you. To the employees: Keep up the great work. Together, we can make this one of the best grocery stores out there. If any of you ever need me, well, I’ll be around. And please only contact me with the intercom in case of emergency.

He gets back into his vehicle and speeds off, headed for a secret entrance in the photo lab. A couple minutes later, Mickey walks over and spots Katie. He runs up to her.

Mickey Tork: Katie!

Katie Collins: Mickey!

They hug. Adam - in his regular Kroger clothes - walks over and sees the two baggers hugging. He’s jealous that Mickey gets to hug Katie, and decides to go for a hug himself.

Adam Hauck: Katie!

Adam hugs her, but she doesn’t hug back. Her arms are down at her sides.

Katie Collins: Where have you been, Adam? Once the store turned to chaos, I didn’t see you.

Adam Hauck: I, uh, hid in the photo lab. I was scared.

Katie Collins: I figured you were a coward. Looks like I’m right.

Adam Hauck: Yeah, well, it’s been a heck of a first day.

Katie Collins: Yeah, Puddin’. I guess it has been.

Adam smiles at Katie calling him “Puddin’” but figures it doesn’t mean anything.

Adam Hauck: Let’s get back to bagging. Surprising as it is, after such an event, there are already customers in line to pay for their groceries.

Mickey Tork: Haha, yeah. Some have been there the whole time.

Adam Hauck: Kroger customers are the most fearless people out there. Their lives are in danger, but that won’t stop them from buying the cereal they came in for.

Katie Collins: Or the pack of cigarettes.

Mickey Tork: They've gotta have their Tastykakes, too.

Adam, Katie and Mickey all look at each other and start to laugh. Then the three baggers each go to a different register and bag for the customers.

CUT TO: Professor Tincher and Adam Hauck are in the basement lab.

Professor Tincher: You did it, Adam. How does it feel?

Adam Hauck: It feels great. I didn’t give up this time and I actually made a difference. I helped people. My fear of birds hasn’t gone away. In fact, it’s bigger than it was before, but at least I know I’m capable of fighting them when I need to. I think I’ll do fine in my new job.

Professor Tincher: It’s gonna be a long battle to rid this store of evil villains, but there’s no one else I’d rather have wearing that mask than you. I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Adam Hauck: Yep. The only downside to all of this is that when I’m not fighting crime, I have to actually bag.

Professor Tincher: Oh hush, and enjoy your first victory as… The Masked Bagger!

THE END… FOR THIS ISSUE

[Adamantium]

Chapter One: Origins

On a hot July morning in 1883, twenty-three-year-old Barney Kroger was standing outside his newly built grocery store. He was calling it The Great Western Tea Company. What would the future hold for this little place? Kroger didn’t have a clue, but he was hopeful and certainly prepared to work hard to keep it afloat until he could profit from it. His first employee, Henry Preston, walked up to Kroger and patted him on the back.

“Can’t believe it’s really happening, can you?” Preston asked.

“This is certainly a thrill, Henry. Just think, in a few hours, we’ll be open for business. It took my life savings to make this possible but it will be worth it.” Kroger replied.

The two men stood there and gazed at the store. Meanwhile, behind the building, something evil was forming from the dirt. A devil was being born. For supernatural reasons unknown to mankind, this devil was created simply to use this building as its playground. Fully formed, this “Kroger Devil” stood up and had an evil grin on his face.

“I can have some fun with this.” He said.

In the front of the store, Barney had to leave in order to get more things ready for the grand opening. When Kroger returned within an hour, he found Henry dead on the floor and a chubby man with a mask over his eyes standing there.

“Who are you?” Barney asked the mysterious figure.

“I’m the Masked Bagger.”

“How did you get here?” Kroger then asked.

For his answer, we have to travel one-hundred-thirty years into the future. It’s 2013, and thirty-one-year-old Adam Hauck is sweeping the sidewalk of his Kroger store in Earth Level 1.