Ok...don't jump on me or anything but I remember reading on here that Desi got a reconciliation on the first divorce because he was Catholic and it is all against the Catholic church to get a divorce...but isn't it against the Catholic church to commit adultry because I remember that being one of the ten commandments? I was just curious because this doesn't make sense to me that he believed in the Catholic church enough to get a reconciliation but not enough to stay faithful?? This is just out of curiosity and trying to get all the questions answered with other opinions so don't get mad...

I'm not Catholic and I sure don't know anything about it, but from my experience, many Catholics (and people of other religions as well) are only Catholic when they feel like it or it will benefit them. I really doubt Desi was a faithful Catholic.

Divorce is not 'allowed' on the Catholic faith as adultery is not either but I think that he went more for his family traditions of hanging out with prostitues than his faith on that case. He followed both his earthly beliefs and his faith to an extent. Probably Lucy wouldn't do certain things so he had to depend on someone else to get it done?

Probably Lucy wouldn't do certain things so he had to depend on someone else to get it done?

Such as Cesar Romero?! :lol:

Sorry. That was below the belt. :)

And that didn't really come out the way it was planned either...

Look at it this way. The Mafia claim to be Catholics, and donate a lot of money to the Church - but I seem to remember it being pretty much forbidden to kill people! Everybody (well, most people anyway) follows their Faith in a lot of different ways, basically interpreting things to best suit themselves. Adultery, according to the Islamic faith, is one of the worst sins you can commit, but Catholics don't seem to have worried about it all that much in years. It's one of those things that's just officially frowned on, like divorce.

Practically everybody in Hollywood seems to claim to be Catholic - and yet practically everybody in Hollywood seems to be committing adultery with each other. The Pope can't excommunicate all of them!

Or maybe he can, I don't know. :)

The Pope needs to "ex" himself if we go there too. Just because he's Catholic and he's the POPE doesnt mean he's a saint

Those were great Mickey, doing stand up anywhere? LOL! And Karen, i doubt that there was anything Lucy would NOT do, Hollywood actors are a versatile bunch, he was just looking for variety and youth i guess.

Looking for something different was already on him because he was following his father's example to an extent

Originally posted by I'maDESIlover
I think that he went more for his family traditions of hanging out with prostitues than his faith on that case. What kind of family tradition is that???:lol: :lol:

The one that he was taught by his father

I never did get the hang of that one, if a man does it, he's macho, if a woman does it, she's, well, you know, it's just not right and you'd think it would have changed by now!

It's ridiculously outdated, yes, but men like to insist that they need it more! Hence the suggestion that it's more understandable if they stray. How far that works in practice, of course, is an entirely different question! :)

I really meant the societal idea that a woman is a tramp if she's had too many speriences as Ricky would say, yet if a man does that, we look up to him.

I know Desi was a faithful believer in God from what his kids say and his book..but his life doesn't show it.

Hey crazy, did you get the tape yet? It left yesterday you know! And i agree about what you said about Desi, he just could not control his URGES, that's all!

nope haven't got it yet! I'll be waiting for it to arrive! :)

Yeah..leave it to Sex-Engine Desi. lol That's what I call him.

Sometimes I think he was insatiable; that Hot Cuban blood sure was flowing

Originally posted by SPLAIN
I really meant the societal idea that a woman is a tramp if she's had too many speriences as Ricky would say, yet if a man does that, we look up to him.

I don't. Men, women, doesn't matter. You cheat on your spouse, I think you're a worthless sleazebag. :D

Darlin, i didn't mean when married, i meant BEFORE marriage, why is it ok for a guy to do it, experiment i mean, but if a woman does it, she's a you know what?

Originally posted by SPLAIN
Darlin, i didn't mean when married, i meant BEFORE marriage, why is it ok for a guy to do it, experiment i mean, but if a woman does it, she's a you know what?

That I don't know. Men just have the power I guess. :rolleyes:

That reminds me of the song "Can't Hold Us Down" by Christina Agulara (I can't stand her, but she does have a point). Here's part of the lyrics:

If you look back in history
It's a common double standard of society
The guy gets all the glory the more he can score
While the girl can do the same and yet you call her a whore
I don't understand why it's okay
The guy can get away with it & the girl gets named

Guess what? I have a solution for all of this! :D

Really? I'm scared:eek:

lol! *nods* But maybe ya'll will figure it..just takes a little common sense! :D

Originally posted by Amber8611
That reminds me of the song "Can't Hold Us Down" by Christina Agulara (I can't stand her, but she does have a point). Here's part of the lyrics:

If you look back in history
It's a common double standard of society
The guy gets all the glory the more he can score
While the girl can do the same and yet you call her a whore
I don't understand why it's okay
The guy can get away with it & the girl gets named

Good Lyrics.

Originally posted by SPLAIN
Darlin, i didn't mean when married, i meant BEFORE marriage, why is it ok for a guy to do it, experiment i mean, but if a woman does it, she's a you know what?

The fact of the matter is, if you are a true Catholic, as Desi claimed to be, it's not considered to be ok before or after...and as I always try to remind people on threads that seem to focus heavily on all of Desi's flaws, Lucy was no saint either.

But in Desi's case, my theory is that his concerns about getting a divorce because of how it would look to the Catholic Church may have been for the sake of his mother more than anything else. It was probably a big pain for her to get her divorce, and she probably cared more about how it looked to the Church than Desi did. Maybe he didn't want his mother to be disappointed in him because another divorce would tarnish the family name even more in the Church's eyes. Think about it, who was the person who encouraged Lucy and Desi to get re-married in the Catholic Chruch because their quicky wedding wasn't authentic to the Church? Desi's mother. And I remember reading that, after Lucy and Desi split for good, it was inevitable that he would get married again because his mother kept telling him that she wouldn't die happy unless her only child found a woman to take care of him for the rest of his life. (In retrospect, that woman could have been her -- she ended up outliving him!) So she really put a lot of pressure on him and had a lot of influence over him.

So were Lucy and Desi truly religious people? No. But I've always looked at Desi as being more spiritual than Lucy. He was a man who always advised his children to not be afraid to ask the "Man Upstairs" for help if they get into a bind, and would marvel at a sunset saying, "God really out did himself tonight." No person in the world is perfect and sinless, not even the model Catholic who is seemingly immaculate. Maybe Desi had a strong belief in God, but had weaknesses in other areas. I think he was aware of it -- his daughter has said that he was like an open wound. I don't think that makes him a bad person. Flawed yes, but who isn't?

Desi's mother was a little of a pain sometimes. I think she wanted to mold him as the husband she lost and saw DESI as one sometimes. If he was so strong-willed why he coulndn't put his foot down and tell his mother to scram whenever she was doing this. He took care of her all his life and she kept bossing him around; I know that her 'beliefs' were a little stronger than his but she had no reason to intervene in any aspect of the marriage and get a 'blessing' from the Catholic church when to say the least not even a blessing from the POPE himself can save a doomed marriage.

*is glad Desi's mother "bossed" him around concerning the Church* ;)

That didn't meant a great deal; because they divorced anyways. Now ; it was more 'legal' (the divorce)since they were married under catholic laws. probably Lucy also thought that he would stop cheating since they had remarried under his faith and that would keep him straight. That's naive and foolish thinking

That's not what I meant. ;) And I'm glad they got remarried in a CHURCH.

They could've gotten married in the Vatican; he still was not going to change his ways or make it a 'happier' marriage

Lalalala...:p

Sweet Sue...just you:crazy:

Originally posted by I'maDESIlover
They could've gotten married in the Vatican; he still was not going to change his ways or make it a 'happier' marriage

Who knows, maybe Desi did intend to settle down when he asked to renew their vows. He said that he remarried Lucy in part to show her that he wanted to anchor their marriage down in all ways. Lucy herself said that he did settle down for awhile. Friends have said that, especially when little Lucie was born, Desi realized that he should knock off some of the tomcatting and he did. It probably wasn't until a little later that he felt the stress of the business and started succumbing his weaknesses of drinking and playing around a lot more. I'm sure he didn't plan that.

But in some ways you're probably right, he didn't learn from his mistakes -- he displayed the same behavior in the second marriage. Although, his second wife was a lot more accepting of his faults than Lucy was. Lucy and Desi didn't have an "arrangement" as Edie and Desi did. ;)

Can you be more specific about this "arrangment". Do you mean the faithfullness or what?:confused:

Supposedly, they had this understanding that he could come and go as he pleased as long as he kept Edie in the lifestyle that she was accustomed to when she was married to her previous husband. Basically he gave her $5000 a month for gambling, and $5000 a month for everyday expenses. Plus he had a hideaway and had a women living there who kept it up for him, and Edie knew about it, but never went there.

LOL! *shakes finger at Desi* Naughty Boy! I still don't see why ya'll get so worked up about Desi. :lol: It's humorous!

Basically he gave her $5000 a month for gambling, and $5000 a month for everyday expenses.

Bloody hell! No wonder he went bankrupt!

Well, she had grown used to a lifestyle with her ex husband, a multi millionnaire. Desi got 2 and a half million from Lucy in '62 when she bought him out, but if he gave away half in taxes, and then had to live the next 14 years, gambling, rarely working, and then the health woes started for both. So he left houses that were heavily mortgaged. Such a sad end to a business genius who forgot you;re supposed to live on the interest, not the capital.