View Full Version : Women....UGH.
Czas na Zywiec 07-25-2003, 01:23 AM Today was not my night. So I'm in the car with a few friends when I have to go drop them off at home after the drive-in movie we saw. There's one person left in the car and I took her home. She's just a friend, nothing serious at all. It's totally platonic. So I drive up infront of her house and she asks me if I can just talk to her a minute. So, being my usual-carefree self, I said sure and turned off the car, not really expecting anything big. She started off her sentence with "I hope this doesn't ruin our friendship..." I, just sat there staring at her....just glaring at her. So she stopped there and asked me if I was okay. I just replied "Yea." Then she said "You don't like conversation?" I wanted to get out of there as soon as I could, so I just said "No, I really don't. Can I just call you tomorrow. Or you call me...or anything..." I could tell she felt really weird, so just said "Okay, sure." She got out of the car, and just walked home. I didn't even have time to say bye, I just drove out of there as fast as I could. I had to leave as soon as possible because I didn't know what to think. I mean, I like her, but only as a friend. I wouldn't even think of getting into a relationship with her. I mean, I don't mean anything bad at that, but she really isn't my type of girl that I'd want a relationship or get involved with, just someone to talk to occasionaly. Now it's killing me because I don't know what she wanted to say, but I couldn't handle it. I'm horrible at confrontation. Ahhh, why do they do these things?! Why oh why did you have to say anything? Now, whenever I see her, this will be the only thing I'm going to think about, if I even see her at all. I mean, we're both moving away from here, in opposite directions, so I don't even expect to see her for a while, so I totally wasn't expecting something like this.
I'm confused like hell. Sorry if it sounded like I stereotyped women in my post, I really didn't mean it. I'm just trying to blow off some steam. Anyone know if they can maybe guess what she was hinting at? I mean, I think it was about...getting into a relationship, but I could be wrong. I'm bad at interpreting signals. And since there are a lot of ladies around here, maybe you'd understand it and interpret it better than I can. Anything will be appreciated.
¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ 07-25-2003, 01:27 AM Dude, she totally wanted you!!!!!!!!!! You shouldve heard her out though. If I were her, Id think you were a jerk- especially if I really liked you. Id be hurt. What I would do is get another friend to find out about it.
Janice 07-25-2003, 01:33 AM Your radar's working fine Chris. She was putting the moves on you. I feel bad for her because it must have been difficult for her to muster up the courage to approach you. It's too bad you didn't hear her out but I can understand how you got flustered. It was an awkward situation.
Unless you can think of something else that she would want to discuss with you, then it sounds like she was going to tell you that she has feelings for you.
Kay Scarpetta 07-25-2003, 01:36 AM Hmmm... maybe you should try talking to her. Explaining it to her, that you don't like her as anything but a friend, might just be your key to let her down easy.
¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ 07-25-2003, 01:37 AM Originally posted by Janice
Your radar's working fine Chris. She was putting the moves on you. I feel bad for her because it must have been difficult for her to muster up the courage to approach you. It's too bad you didn't hear her out but I can understand how you got flustered. It was an awkward situation.
Unless you can think of something else that she would want to discuss with you, then it sounds like she was going to tell you that she has feelings for you.
Yah. You have no idea how much courage it took for me to finally ask the kid I liked to go to the prom with me. Of course he turned me down and so then I felt like an ass, but I got over it. Wont see me asking anyone out ever again though.
Czas na Zywiec 07-25-2003, 01:39 AM Originally posted by Janice
Your radar's working fine Chris. She was putting the moves on you. I feel bad for her because it must have been difficult for her to muster up the courage to approach you. It's too bad you didn't hear her out but I can understand how you got flustered. It was an awkward situation.
Unless you can think of something else that she would want to discuss with you, then it sounds like she was going to tell you that she has feelings for you.
The thing is that I've never even been in a relationship, not even close to it. So I don't have any past experience, but she's had tons of boyfriends. I wish I had heard what she was going to say, but since it's never happened, I just freaked and my body just took over and tried to get me out of there. I don't even want to get into any relationship until I'm in college. I'm perfectly happy without one at this point in my life.
~*Hannah_Lee*~ 07-25-2003, 03:13 AM Originally posted by Original Prankster
The thing is that I've never even been in a relationship, not even close to it. So I don't have any past experience, but she's had tons of boyfriends. I wish I had heard what she was going to say, but since it's never happened, I just freaked and my body just took over and tried to get me out of there. I don't even want to get into any relationship until I'm in college. I'm perfectly happy without one at this point in my life.
I think sometimes I should have been born a guy...I would have reacted the same way you did if a guy had've done that to me. It seems that she wants more than friendship with you, but I have no relationship history so I can't give advice from first-hand experience.
dawsongirl 07-25-2003, 03:28 AM Oh...I have no idea. And I'm a girl! We're an awfully confusing species.
Ugh...I've been approached with guys who wanted to date me, and I just wasn't interested. So naturally I handled the whole thing wrong and came across as a bitch. It's so hard to say "I'm not interested" and be gentle. Because they always hear "I hate you" or "You're ugly" when that wasn't the case.
But then I'm 23 and never had a boyfriend, so what do I know?
brownsocks 07-25-2003, 01:56 PM Originally posted by Original Prankster
The thing is that I've never even been in a relationship, not even close to it. So I don't have any past experience, but she's had tons of boyfriends. I wish I had heard what she was going to say, but since it's never happened, I just freaked and my body just took over and tried to get me out of there. I don't even want to get into any relationship until I'm in college. I'm perfectly happy without one at this point in my life.
you really need to talk to her. trust me it kills the person who wants to say something more than you could think. when the person is a friend it is worse. i know i've been the person who had something to say and the worst thing is if the other person says nothing at all
You could try to not be so freaked out about it. I can understand your initial panick but now that that's over, just talk to her. See where the conversation goes. You might have misread her all together or you might not have. Either way, there is no shame in saying, "I am not comfortable about being in a relationship right now".That's not an insult to her. It's kind of like that skit on Seinfeld. The one about, "Oh, it's not you, it's me" lOl. Relax and don't allow it to eat at you. Don't be afraid to deal with it.
Max Whittaker 07-25-2003, 05:42 PM Originally posted by Original Prankster
The thing is that I've never even been in a relationship, not even close to it. So I don't have any past experience, but she's had tons of boyfriends. I wish I had heard what she was going to say, but since it's never happened, I just freaked and my body just took over and tried to get me out of there. I don't even want to get into any relationship until I'm in college. I'm perfectly happy without one at this point in my life.
I understand completely! I don't want to date until well into my college years. And I've had one girl totally hit on me! It was frightening and I handled it really badly.
I'll give you my best advice. Go talk to the girl and tell her the truth. It will be awkward but you'll both feel better after all is out. Then, move on. Don't let regret or embarrassment eat away at you.
K, if I was her, this is what I'd want to hear: my friend coming up to me and saying "Sorry I couldn't hear ya out last time, I was just in a really weird mood. What did you want to say?" and then I could either say it or, chicken out with a simple "forget it."
You know, you have perfectly good reasons not to want to be in a relationship - and she should definately understand that, especially since you're already friends. Just don't lose fact of the sight of the fact that she is your friend - for lack of a better word - act friendly. Just say you're there to hear her out. Be calm and casual, it should stop you both from feeling weird about it. Good luck! :)
M82A1 07-25-2003, 08:18 PM Originally posted by Max Whittaker
I'll give you my best advice. Go talk to the girl and tell her the truth. It will be awkward but you'll both feel better after all is out. Then, move on. Don't let regret or embarrassment eat away at you. That was the best piece of advice I've heard all day! I was in a similar situation, and, I too handled it badly.
You should probably talk to her and clear things up.
Things will just get worse if you don't.
Titania 07-25-2003, 10:28 PM Originally posted by Liza
K, if I was her, this is what I'd want to hear: my friend coming up to me and saying "Sorry I couldn't hear ya out last time, I was just in a really weird mood. What did you want to say?" and then I could either say it or, chicken out with a simple "forget it."
I'll second that.
Its hard to know what to do when you're put on the spot like that, and you know whats coming, but if I were her I'd be pretty mad that you didn't hear me out. You've got to talk if you have any hope of keeping your friendship intact.
Czas na Zywiec 07-25-2003, 10:42 PM Well, I called her today as planned, and everything is cool between us. Whew. :) I was expecting a lot worse, but she told me she totally understood what I did. She said she dosn't mind, I mean we are both leaving for college in less than a month. I really don't know what came over me last night, because now that I think of it, it doesn't seem so bad. *sighs* Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid...
Max Whittaker 07-25-2003, 11:04 PM Originally posted by Original Prankster
Well, I called her today as planned, and everything is cool between us. Whew. :) I was expecting a lot worse, but she told me she totally understood what I did. She said she dosn't mind, I mean we are both leaving for college in less than a month. I really don't know what came over me last night, because now that I think of it, it doesn't seem so bad. *sighs* Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid...
:lol: :) ;) Good! Glad you were able to save face and friend! Chalk this up as an important learning experience!
The Obsolete Man 08-09-2003, 03:24 AM And always remember... women will leave you a broken, defeated shell of your former self, that is, if they don't leave you dead.
Alcohol will also leave you a broken, defeated shell of your former self, that is, if it doesn't leave you dead. However, with alcohol, you won't have as much emotional trauma. :D
I kid, I kid. Well, not really... :D
Anyway, it's only right for a fella to be oblivious. Once, I didn't realize some chick was hitting on me until a month later.
Sad but true.
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