NY Times Article (http://www.nytimes.com/2003/06/04/business/04WIRES-MARTHA.html?ex=1055995200&en=b7b94b310cfbcf7c&ei=5004&partner=UNTD)

MSN Article (http://msnbc.com/news/922014.asp)

I think the biggest shock to me is thats shes 61 years old.

Originally posted by ¤MsConanOBrien¤
NY Times Article (http://www.nytimes.com/2003/06/04/business/04WIRES-MARTHA.html?ex=1055995200&en=b7b94b310cfbcf7c&ei=5004&partner=UNTD)

MSN Article (http://msnbc.com/news/922014.asp)

I think the biggest shock to me is thats shes 61 years old.

I'm glad she got charged. She seems evil. And the fact that she's 61 shocked me too!

Originally posted by MaRtInA_GuRL


I'm glad she got charged. She seems evil. And the fact that she's 61 shocked me too!
:lol: :lol: :lol:

They were talking about it GDL and Dorothy said shes tough (Martha) and will put up a good fight by throwing a bottle of Merlot.

:lol: I'm actually watching the movie now.

And I'm not shocked about her age. I mean she was a teenager while American Bandstand was on the air.

Originally posted by ¤MsConanOBrien¤

:lol: :lol: :lol:

They were talking about it GDL and Dorothy said shes tough (Martha) and will put up a good fight by throwing a bottle of Merlot.

:rotflmao:

Originally posted by ¤MsConanOBrien¤

:lol: :lol: :lol:

They were talking about it GDL and Dorothy said shes tough (Martha) and will put up a good fight by throwing a bottle of Merlot.

Martha: Stay tuned, it’ll be fun.
(And cut)
Martha: Who opened three bottles of wine? Do you know how much a good bottle of wine costs? And for God’s sake, did I not ask for Merlot?!?

Originally posted by Original Prankster
Martha: Stay tuned, it’ll be fun.
(And cut)
Martha: Who opened three bottles of wine? Do you know how much a good bottle of wine costs? And for God’s sake, did I not ask for Merlot?!?
LOL. I loved the movie.
Martha, if you're guilty: "It's not a good thing."

Originally posted by Janice

LOL. I loved the movie.
Martha, if you're guilty: "It's not a good thing."

It was hilarious. I recorded it and am watching it again right now. I'm trying to get some good quotes. When I'm done, I'll post them here. :D

OH CRAP :doh:

I didn't realize there was already a Martha topic...

Oh well mine is a poll so it's a little diff

sorry about that :D

Originally posted by Original Prankster
It was hilarious. I recorded it and am watching it again right now. I'm trying to get some good quotes. When I'm done, I'll post them here. :D
I can only paraphrase, but there's a scene in K-mart when Martha meets the executives in the sheet's aisle, and she says something along the lines of....

"What's this junk? (opens package of sheets), I don't want to touch them, much less sleep on them. Nothing less than 300 count....
I'm here, not to sink to your level, but for you to rise to mine."

I'll be curious how much of that I got right, lol.

Originally posted by Janice
I'm here, not to sink to your level, but for you to raise to mine."
Oh I remember that line. I was like WOAH!:lol:

well like the old saying goes...

"what goes around comes around"

I think Martha deserves to get hers for being such a bit*h all these years...:lol:

http://www.foxnews.com/images/92479/13_3_060403_martha.jpg

Will Martha go to prison? If she does she'll be treated like any celebrity or politician committing crimes: she'll get respect. In the UK a member of the house of lords was imprisoned, he's allowed to wwork at a theatre a few hours a day behind scenes, allowed out a while to go to his fmaily home, without guards I think... evil! Martha seemed too perfect, maybe the snl sketches of martha impersonations will start full speed ahead. Martha to prisoners "Now, make sure to carve right here, in the middle of the guards throat, carefully- it's a good thing"

:lol: she will decorate her cell with things made out strips of her less than 300 count sheets :lol:

Originally posted by MonarC
:lol: she will decorate her cell with things made out strips of her less than 300 count sheets :lol:
My God shell have a breakdown!!:lol:

Martha probably won't see any jail time.

Personally, I think they're going after her because she's a good target.
People love to hate her.

Originally posted by Janice

I can only paraphrase, but there's a scene in K-mart when Martha meets the executives in the sheet's aisle, and she says something along the lines of....

"What's this junk? (opens package of sheets), I don't want to touch them, much less sleep on them. Nothing less than 300 count....
I'm here, not to sink to your level, but for you to rise to mine."

I'll be curious how much of that I got right, lol.

Not bad, not bad at all. :lol: Here's part of the scene.

Man #1: I just hope she’s like Jaclyn Smith.
Man #2: Oh, lovely girl. Never causes any trouble. Martha!
Martha: Hello everyone! I’m so looking forward to working with you all.
Man#2: Well so are we!
Martha: [Looks around.] What’s all this crap?
Man#1: These are some of the products we’ll be introducing under the Martha Stewart name.
Martha: I don’t think so. My name could not be used without my approval, and uh, to put it kindly, this is horrendous. The colors are garish, there’s no philosophy to the design. Sheets…[Rips open a package.]…made of what? What’s the thread count? I hate touching this much less lying on it. I want cotton. I want 300-thread count…minimum. Or this face doesn’t sell these sheets. Just because K-Mart sells inexpensive products, doesn’t mean they can’t be beautiful. That’s why I’m here. Not to sink to your level, but to raise you to mine. [Smiles.]

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

And here's some other quotes I caught.

Martha: Today we have two very special guests. Lily and Natasha are here to help me bake a cake. Did you know that’s how I got my start?
Girl: By baking a cake?
Martha: If you let me finish Lily, I’ll tell you.

Martha: [Runs after woman.] Oh Norma, every good cook deserves a copper pot. [Throws pot.]

Martha: In the mood for a little magic? [Puts on gnome hat and speaks in a real high voice.] I’m a magic little person.

Martha: And that’s how you make them.
Woman: Martha, I tried making the lemon tartlets, and they don’t turn out right.
Martha: Well you have to follow the recipe.
Woman: Well I did follow the recipe…twice. Exactly the way you…
Martha: THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH MY RECIPE. OBVIOUSLY YOU CAN’T COOK!!

Martha: You know, nutcracking isn’t as difficult as it seems. Most people just don’t know how to use a nutcracker. [Picks up nutcracker.] All you do is put it in, squeeze down, and…[Cracks nut.]…crack! It’s that simple. [Smiles.]

Martha: Some people like orchids, but today, we’re going to learn an entirely new recipe with lima beans. [Pauses.] Are you kidding me? Where are the lima beans? I’m sitting here talking about lima beans and there aren’t any? Someone in my staff forgot to put out the lima beans? Excuse me! Why is everyone here so stupid?!?

Originally posted by TJL
People love to hate her.
Exactly, like Leona "Only the little people pay taxes" Helmsley.
Leona's staff's testimony was her ultimate demise. Treat people like dirt, and it comes back to haunt you sometimes.

I hope she ends up in the slammer. Damn nutcase. Takes her 2 hours to make a sandwhich and 2 minutes to eat it.

Originally posted by Original Prankster

Not bad, not bad at all. :lol: Here's part of the scene.

You're killing me over here Chris. :lol: Thanks for the recap. The nutcracker scene was hilarious because Martha is such a nutcracker herself.

Originally posted by Janice

You're killing me over here Chris. :lol: Thanks for the recap. The nutcracker scene was hilarious because Martha is such a nutcracker herself.

And with that litle smile of hers. Kills me everytime.

Originally posted by Original Prankster


Not bad, not bad at all. :lol: Here's part of the scene.

Man #1: I just hope she’s like Jaclyn Smith.
Man #2: Oh, lovely girl. Never causes any trouble. Martha!
Martha: Hello everyone! I’m so looking forward to working with you all.
Man#2: Well so are we!
Martha: [Looks around.] What’s all this crap?
Man#1: These are some of the products we’ll be introducing under the Martha Stewart name.
Martha: I don’t think so. My name could not be used without my approval, and uh, to put it kindly, this is horrendous. The colors are garish, there’s no philosophy to the design. Sheets…[Rips open a package.]…made of what? What’s the thread count? I hate touching this much less lying on it. I want cotton. I want 300-thread count…minimum. Or this face doesn’t sell these sheets. Just because K-Mart sells inexpensive products, doesn’t mean they can’t be beautiful. That’s why I’m here. Not to sink to your level, but to raise you to mine. [Smiles.]


:rotflmao:

Originally posted by Original Prankster


Not bad, not bad at all. :lol: Here's part of the scene.

Man #1: I just hope she’s like Jaclyn Smith.
Man #2: Oh, lovely girl. Never causes any trouble. Martha!
Martha: Hello everyone! I’m so looking forward to working with you all.
Man#2: Well so are we!
Martha: [Looks around.] What’s all this crap?
Man#1: These are some of the products we’ll be introducing under the Martha Stewart name.
Martha: I don’t think so. My name could not be used without my approval, and uh, to put it kindly, this is horrendous. The colors are garish, there’s no philosophy to the design. Sheets…[Rips open a package.]…made of what? What’s the thread count? I hate touching this much less lying on it. I want cotton. I want 300-thread count…minimum. Or this face doesn’t sell these sheets. Just because K-Mart sells inexpensive products, doesn’t mean they can’t be beautiful. That’s why I’m here. Not to sink to your level, but to raise you to mine. [Smiles.]

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

And here's some other quotes I caught.

Martha: Today we have two very special guests. Lily and Natasha are here to help me bake a cake. Did you know that’s how I got my start?
Girl: By baking a cake?
Martha: If you let me finish Lily, I’ll tell you.

Martha: [Runs after woman.] Oh Norma, every good cook deserves a copper pot. [Throws pot.]

Martha: In the mood for a little magic? [Puts on gnome hat and speaks in a real high voice.] I’m a magic little person.

Martha: And that’s how you make them.
Woman: Martha, I tried making the lemon tartlets, and they don’t turn out right.
Martha: Well you have to follow the recipe.
Woman: Well I did follow the recipe…twice. Exactly the way you…
Martha: THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH MY RECIPE. OBVIOUSLY YOU CAN’T COOK!!

Martha: You know, nutcracking isn’t as difficult as it seems. Most people just don’t know how to use a nutcracker. [Picks up nutcracker.] All you do is put it in, squeeze down, and…[Cracks nut.]…crack! It’s that simple. [Smiles.]

Martha: Some people like orchids, but today, we’re going to learn an entirely new recipe with lima beans. [Pauses.] Are you kidding me? Where are the lima beans? I’m sitting here talking about lima beans and there aren’t any? Someone in my staff forgot to put out the lima beans? Excuse me! Why is everyone here so stupid?!?
AH i love them. i must put one in my sig
http://www.bobfromaccounting.com/television/martha.jpg

:lol:

theyre gonna hafta put a kitchen in her cell. and grapefruits so she can squeeze em.

Originally posted by Janice
:lol: :lol:lol

here is martha getting ready to shove a turkey up her ass.

Originally posted by Janice
:lol:

:D

http://www.allfunpix.com/humor/pics4/msliving.jpg

Investing 101

Originally posted by Janice
Investing 101

:rotflmao: