Chad22
01-11-2003, 06:08 PM
I was just looking on Yahoo and found this. I Thought it was pretty funny
http://www.smiteboy.com/chuck.html
Where Is Chuck?
The Cunningham Conspiracy
I guess the 1950s was an idyllic time in America...a peaceful, gentle time. Sure, there was death, blood, and horror...but it was downright dreamy compared to the decades of torment that were to follow. I still remember my visits to Howard Cunningham's hardware store (before Wal-Mart put him out of business, that is). Mr. C would lock up the store for the day and invite us all over to his house for dinner, where his overworked wife Marion would prepare a hearty feast. Yeah, I remember it like it was yesterday.
Sometimes I'd go visit Fonzie in his garage apartment. I thought it was kind of weird that he had about 128 white t-shirts in his closet and all, but that was his business. What really bugged me is how he claimed to date all these women, but you never really saw any of them. And you never heard the Cunninghams say "Hey, pal...why don't you and your girlfriends cut out the noise?!? What are you, some kind of animal?!?" Nope, never happened. I'm not even cool, but if I had lived in an apartment not 20 feet away from those people, I would have been thrown out on my butt in about 3 hours.
Later, we'd go up to Arnold's and hang out for a while. Fonzie had hit the jukebox so many times it was broken, and now we didn't have to spend any money to play songs. Arnold was always giving away free food to everybody, too. Maybe that's why he went broke and had to sell out to Big Al a few years later. He wasn't much of a businessman anyway. The last time I saw him he told me he'd gone back to teaching karate to teenagers, but I wasn't sure what he meant.
If I had friends like Ralph Malph and Potsie, I'd probably kill myself. They were always hanging around the house and bumming food until Mrs. C got mad and made them go home. I always thought it was kind of odd that they were always together and you never saw them with girls. Hmmm.
Of course, there was that business with Chuck. You know, the oldest Cunningham kid. Don't you remember him? When Richie was in high school, Chuck was in college and still living at home. He was a tall drink of water, that boy. I remember he'd come through the living room, usually dribbling a basketball. Then one day, he was gone. And they never mentioned him again.
I last saw the Cunninghams at the wedding of Joanie and Chachi, and they were all there. I think they even flew Arnold in for the occasion, I can't remember...but no Chuck. Howard even held up a glass of champagne to toast and said how happy he was that both of his children were now married (not to each other, of course). It was then I knew that something must have happened to Chuck...something terrible. Something that no one was willing to talk about...but what?
Was he killed in a knife fight with Fonzie? Abducted by a UFO? Did he become a Jehovah's Witness? Nobody knows. My only clue was a fleeting reference made by a family member about the army. I suspect that he probably entered the military in the late-1950s and was probably killed in Laos or Cambodia, possibly Cuba. That would have caused such deep shame and guilt that his own family never mentioned him again.
Maybe the government only told the Cunninghams that Chuck was dead, and he went even further into intelligence than anyone could have imagined...perhaps even the C.I.A.! Unidentified Chuck-like men were later spotted in Dealy Plaza in 1963, at the Democratic Convention in 1968, and at the Munich Olympic Games in 1972. Coincidence? I think not.
But there's more. It's my belief that Chuck resurfaced in 1976 as the unseen leader of an elite strikeband of fashion models trained to kill. That's right....Charlie's Angels. Sure, he disguised his voice, but you know it was him. If you don't believe me, just ask Boslee (Howard Cunningham's long-lost love child?). It's the truth, I tell you!
:lol:
http://www.smiteboy.com/chuck.html
Where Is Chuck?
The Cunningham Conspiracy
I guess the 1950s was an idyllic time in America...a peaceful, gentle time. Sure, there was death, blood, and horror...but it was downright dreamy compared to the decades of torment that were to follow. I still remember my visits to Howard Cunningham's hardware store (before Wal-Mart put him out of business, that is). Mr. C would lock up the store for the day and invite us all over to his house for dinner, where his overworked wife Marion would prepare a hearty feast. Yeah, I remember it like it was yesterday.
Sometimes I'd go visit Fonzie in his garage apartment. I thought it was kind of weird that he had about 128 white t-shirts in his closet and all, but that was his business. What really bugged me is how he claimed to date all these women, but you never really saw any of them. And you never heard the Cunninghams say "Hey, pal...why don't you and your girlfriends cut out the noise?!? What are you, some kind of animal?!?" Nope, never happened. I'm not even cool, but if I had lived in an apartment not 20 feet away from those people, I would have been thrown out on my butt in about 3 hours.
Later, we'd go up to Arnold's and hang out for a while. Fonzie had hit the jukebox so many times it was broken, and now we didn't have to spend any money to play songs. Arnold was always giving away free food to everybody, too. Maybe that's why he went broke and had to sell out to Big Al a few years later. He wasn't much of a businessman anyway. The last time I saw him he told me he'd gone back to teaching karate to teenagers, but I wasn't sure what he meant.
If I had friends like Ralph Malph and Potsie, I'd probably kill myself. They were always hanging around the house and bumming food until Mrs. C got mad and made them go home. I always thought it was kind of odd that they were always together and you never saw them with girls. Hmmm.
Of course, there was that business with Chuck. You know, the oldest Cunningham kid. Don't you remember him? When Richie was in high school, Chuck was in college and still living at home. He was a tall drink of water, that boy. I remember he'd come through the living room, usually dribbling a basketball. Then one day, he was gone. And they never mentioned him again.
I last saw the Cunninghams at the wedding of Joanie and Chachi, and they were all there. I think they even flew Arnold in for the occasion, I can't remember...but no Chuck. Howard even held up a glass of champagne to toast and said how happy he was that both of his children were now married (not to each other, of course). It was then I knew that something must have happened to Chuck...something terrible. Something that no one was willing to talk about...but what?
Was he killed in a knife fight with Fonzie? Abducted by a UFO? Did he become a Jehovah's Witness? Nobody knows. My only clue was a fleeting reference made by a family member about the army. I suspect that he probably entered the military in the late-1950s and was probably killed in Laos or Cambodia, possibly Cuba. That would have caused such deep shame and guilt that his own family never mentioned him again.
Maybe the government only told the Cunninghams that Chuck was dead, and he went even further into intelligence than anyone could have imagined...perhaps even the C.I.A.! Unidentified Chuck-like men were later spotted in Dealy Plaza in 1963, at the Democratic Convention in 1968, and at the Munich Olympic Games in 1972. Coincidence? I think not.
But there's more. It's my belief that Chuck resurfaced in 1976 as the unseen leader of an elite strikeband of fashion models trained to kill. That's right....Charlie's Angels. Sure, he disguised his voice, but you know it was him. If you don't believe me, just ask Boslee (Howard Cunningham's long-lost love child?). It's the truth, I tell you!
:lol: