Frank Gannucci
12-20-2025, 08:29 AM
A Honeymooners XMas Eve:
(Ralph & Ed are in the American Dream Mall at the Meadowlands in NJ. It’s XMas Eve.)
Ralph: “What a way to get some last minute gifts.”
Ed: “That’s the spirit Ralph-ie boy!”
(A man walks up to them.)
Man: “Sir and sir, we need someone to play Santa and his elf. Are you interested in making some kids dreams come true?”
Ralph: “What the heck. We will do it.”
Ed: “I will be Santa.”
(Ralph gives Ed a stern look.)
Ed: “Ok. You will be Santa.”
Man: “Good we have got the right costume for you. It’s in XXXXXXL.”
As a token of gratitude, these are yours to keep.”
(Ed laughs.)
Ralph (yells): “SHUT UP!”
Man: “This job is just for tonight. We close at 6p.”
Ralph: “That’s enough time for us to arrive for our XMas Eve party at my apartment.”
Ed: “Inside that head of yours is a thinking machine.”
Ralph: “Oh I know.”
(They get ready for the job. Ralph as Santa sits on his chair. A kid comes on his lap.)
Ralph: “Hohoho! What do you want for XMas?”
Boy: “A space helmet.”
Ed: “Mt type of kid. I want one because I love Captain Video and his Video Rangers.”
(Ralph rolls his eyes.)
Ralph: “If you are a good boy, then you may get your wish. Hohohoho!”
(More kids come by past the closing time. Ralph & Ed still clad in their costumes go to leave. They go into the car Ralph borrowed from Freddie Muller only to be stuck in traffic gridlock.)
Ralph (yells): “WHAT? THIS IS A FINE FIX.”
Ed: “If only we can fly like Santa and his reindeer. If only you can fit through the manhole so we can swim home.”
Ralph (yells): “SHUT UP!”
(To be continued.)
(Ralph & Ed are in the American Dream Mall at the Meadowlands in NJ. It’s XMas Eve.)
Ralph: “What a way to get some last minute gifts.”
Ed: “That’s the spirit Ralph-ie boy!”
(A man walks up to them.)
Man: “Sir and sir, we need someone to play Santa and his elf. Are you interested in making some kids dreams come true?”
Ralph: “What the heck. We will do it.”
Ed: “I will be Santa.”
(Ralph gives Ed a stern look.)
Ed: “Ok. You will be Santa.”
Man: “Good we have got the right costume for you. It’s in XXXXXXL.”
As a token of gratitude, these are yours to keep.”
(Ed laughs.)
Ralph (yells): “SHUT UP!”
Man: “This job is just for tonight. We close at 6p.”
Ralph: “That’s enough time for us to arrive for our XMas Eve party at my apartment.”
Ed: “Inside that head of yours is a thinking machine.”
Ralph: “Oh I know.”
(They get ready for the job. Ralph as Santa sits on his chair. A kid comes on his lap.)
Ralph: “Hohoho! What do you want for XMas?”
Boy: “A space helmet.”
Ed: “Mt type of kid. I want one because I love Captain Video and his Video Rangers.”
(Ralph rolls his eyes.)
Ralph: “If you are a good boy, then you may get your wish. Hohohoho!”
(More kids come by past the closing time. Ralph & Ed still clad in their costumes go to leave. They go into the car Ralph borrowed from Freddie Muller only to be stuck in traffic gridlock.)
Ralph (yells): “WHAT? THIS IS A FINE FIX.”
Ed: “If only we can fly like Santa and his reindeer. If only you can fit through the manhole so we can swim home.”
Ralph (yells): “SHUT UP!”
(To be continued.)