A Honeymooners Columbus Day:

(Ralph has the TV set up and gets the popcorn ready just like in “TV or Not TV.” Ed Norton comes down. Crowd cheers.)

Ed: “Ready for an unusual way to celebrate Columbus Day Ralph by watching Home Alone and Home Alone 2?”

Ralph: “I certainly am. Those movies were directed by a guy named Christopher Columbus.”

Ed: “And we are doing this on Columbus Day too.”

Ralph: “We are going to watch this by streaming them.”

Ed: “Great thinking Ralph. When I think of streaming I think of my job.”

(Ralph rolls his eyes.)

(They turn on the movie. There is banging on the door. Ralph answers it.)

(Macaulay Culkin comes in. Crowd cheers.)

Man: “Would you please turn that down sir? I’m trying to sleep.”

Ralph: “Look you. We are celebrating Christopher Columbus by watching Home Alone movies now I will not turn down the volume NO MATTER WHAT!”

(Ralph shuts the door. They watch the movies. After repeated banging on the door, the electricity gets cut off.)

Ralph: “What the?”

Ed: “Looks like a blackout.”

Man (from outside): “Hey man, I cut off your electricity and come get me to turn it back on.” (Sarcastically): “I’m really scared.”

Ralph: “You are coming with me Norton. Let’s not ruin our Columbus Day.”

(They do and walk outside. They slip on micro machines and get blasted with paint. They come back inside.)

Ed: “Ralph, I’m surprised that you didn’t fall through the floor.”

Ralph (yells): “LETS GET HIM!”

(They try but they get more and more dumped onto them. Cops come and they all go to jail.)

Ed: “Another one of your plans went to pot Ralph.”

Ralph: “One of these days Norton, POW right in the kisser.”

(Still with paint on him, Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: “Folks, Art Carney.”

(Crowd cheers as Art comes on stage and shakes Jackie’s hand.)

Jackie: “And Macaulay Culkin.”

(Crowd cheers as Macaulay comes on stage and shakes Jackie’s hand.)

Jackie (to Macaulay): “You were great.” (To the crowd, yells): “GOOD NIGHT EVERYONE!”

(Crowd cheers.)