Frank Gannucci
02-17-2023, 08:23 AM
A Honeymooners President’s Day:
(Ralph & Ed are getting ready for the Raccoon Presidents Day convention. They both got their Raccoon uniforms on.)
Ed: “Ralph, I can’t wait until we see all of our fellow brother Raccoons in uniform in Washington. Did Cassidy lent you the car?”
Ralph: “Yes, he did and with me driving some of the boys, I got the perfect route. Alice is going with the Raccoon Lodge Ladies Auxiliary and we argued about our routes last night. She said that my route is a bad idea. I said that I know better in the family and if I’m wrong, I am the bigger person.”
(A pause.)
Ralph (yells): “DON’T YOU DARE!”
(Alice cones out. She is ready too.)
Alice: “Ralph, be sensible. Take my route.”
Ralph: “Alice, for the last time, I am taking MY route and I will prove you wrong just like I do every time.”
(Alice laughs.)
Ralph: “I will show you. This will be a President’s Day that I will remember. All of our former presidents like George Washington will be proud of me.”
(Alice goes into the bedroom in disgust.)
(In Washington D.C. All of the members of the Raccoon Lodge Ladies auxiliary are there for the ceremony and only some of the male Raccoons. The reason? Ralph is late.)
(Ralph and some angry members arrive late. They approach the Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler.)
Ed: “We would have been here earlier had not Ralph used Alice’s route and if Ralph checked the gas gauge and didn’t ignore the system when it said: Check Tire Pressure. Well, are we to late for the eats? I know Ralph may be upset if we are.”
Ralph (yells): “OKAY NORTON! PUT ‘EM UP!”
(Ralph wants to fight Ed. They get separated.)
Alice: “Ralph, what do you have to say for yourself?”
Ralph: “Ok. I’m sorry. I should’ve listened to you. I’m sorry everyone. If I listened to Alice, I would be so much better. Baby, you’re the greatest!”
(They hug and kiss.)
(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)
Jackie: “Thank you. The Miami Beach crowds are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!”
(Crowd cheers.)
(Ralph & Ed are getting ready for the Raccoon Presidents Day convention. They both got their Raccoon uniforms on.)
Ed: “Ralph, I can’t wait until we see all of our fellow brother Raccoons in uniform in Washington. Did Cassidy lent you the car?”
Ralph: “Yes, he did and with me driving some of the boys, I got the perfect route. Alice is going with the Raccoon Lodge Ladies Auxiliary and we argued about our routes last night. She said that my route is a bad idea. I said that I know better in the family and if I’m wrong, I am the bigger person.”
(A pause.)
Ralph (yells): “DON’T YOU DARE!”
(Alice cones out. She is ready too.)
Alice: “Ralph, be sensible. Take my route.”
Ralph: “Alice, for the last time, I am taking MY route and I will prove you wrong just like I do every time.”
(Alice laughs.)
Ralph: “I will show you. This will be a President’s Day that I will remember. All of our former presidents like George Washington will be proud of me.”
(Alice goes into the bedroom in disgust.)
(In Washington D.C. All of the members of the Raccoon Lodge Ladies auxiliary are there for the ceremony and only some of the male Raccoons. The reason? Ralph is late.)
(Ralph and some angry members arrive late. They approach the Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler.)
Ed: “We would have been here earlier had not Ralph used Alice’s route and if Ralph checked the gas gauge and didn’t ignore the system when it said: Check Tire Pressure. Well, are we to late for the eats? I know Ralph may be upset if we are.”
Ralph (yells): “OKAY NORTON! PUT ‘EM UP!”
(Ralph wants to fight Ed. They get separated.)
Alice: “Ralph, what do you have to say for yourself?”
Ralph: “Ok. I’m sorry. I should’ve listened to you. I’m sorry everyone. If I listened to Alice, I would be so much better. Baby, you’re the greatest!”
(They hug and kiss.)
(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)
Jackie: “Thank you. The Miami Beach crowds are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!”
(Crowd cheers.)