View Full Version : (A Honeymooners Memorial Day):


Frank Gannucci
05-27-2022, 07:37 AM
(A Honeymooners Memorial Day):

(The Kramdens and Norton’s are headed to Alice’s parents house.)

Ralph: “For once Alice, I am looking forward to being at that blabbermouth Mother’s house.”

Alice: “Yeah but I wish it wasn’t because you challenged her to a cook-off this Memorial Day.”

Ed: “Ralph, just wants to put his money AND food where his mouth is. Hahaha.”

Ralph: “Ooooooooh, you are going to get it Norton. But, I will finally shut your mother’s mouth. She says she learned all her cooking skills from watching Julia Child. I learned my culinary skills by watching a public access cooking show.”

(The girls laugh.)

Alice: “Oh Ralph, you are in for a rude awakening.”

Ralph: “That is what you think. Me and Norton are going to Target to buy another grill after I broke the last one.”

(They go to Target and get the grill.)

Ralph: “Ok Norton. Load the grill into the car that I borrowed from Cassidy.”

Ed: “Ok. After all, you picked out the grill so I can load it. Fair enough.”

(Ed accidentally drops the grill on Ralph’s foot.)

Ralph (yells): “OWWWWWWWWW!”

(Ralph challenges Ed to a fight but the girls break it up and they all load the grill. Than they arrive at Alice’s parents house.)

Alice’s Mom: “Hello everyone. Hey Ralph, get ready to lose and I hope you don’t eat all the food this Memorial Day.”

Ralph: “You will lose I guarantee it.”

(They set up the grills side by side. Alice & Ed are trying to talk sense into Ralph.)

Alice: “Ralph, I am telling you. You don’t cook hot dogs like that.”

Ralph: “Listen Alice, I AM THE KING. You are nothing. I know what I am doing and I am not going to start a fire.”

(They all bicker. Meanwhile, lots of burnt smoke emanates from Ralph’s grill because he isn’t cooking correctly.)

(Later on, Ralph needs more lighter fluid.)

Ralph: “I am going to put more lighter fluid into the grill. I will show you all the proper way to do it. I KNOW ALL ABOUT IT.”

(He does and he starts a fire. The fire department comes.)

Fireman: “Good thing we’re not too late.”

Alice’s Mom: “You are too late to see my big fat son-in-law make a fool of himself.”

Ed: “I guess that means you lost.”

Ralph (yells): “PUT ‘EM UP YOU TWO.”

Ed (yells): “I’LL ADMIT YOU GOT US OUTWEIGHED BUT WE WILL FIGHT YOU ANYWAY.”

(Everyone breaks it up.)

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: “Thank you. I just want to say to everyone especially the war veterans in the front row, a Hapoy Memorial Day.”

(Everyone cheers.)