Frank Gannucci
04-12-2022, 10:42 AM
An I love Lucy Income Tax Day:
(Lucy & Ricky are at the dining room table.)
Ricky: “Lucy, when are you goin’ to take the Income Tax forms down to R&H Block for them to do?”
Lucy: “Ricky, that’s H&R Block.”
Ricky: “Look I don’t care what type of block it is. When are you going to do it?”
Lucy: “When I feel like it. I’m tired.”
Ricky: “Tired? It’s 8a.”
(The Mertzes come in. Fred is all worried.)
Ethel: “Hi everyone.”
Fred: “Hello Ricky?”
Ricky: “Hello you two. Listen Fred, I got a question. When do you take your taxes down to H&R Block?”
Fred: “Never.”
Ricky: “Never?”
Ethel: “You think that Fred would spend money to get his taxes done? He always orders me to do it alone with our ancient calculators.”
(Ricky laughs.)
Lucy: “Ethel, we got to go downtown. We will be right back.”
Ricky: “What about the taxes?”
Lucy: “I’ll do them later.”
(On April 15th, Lucy is frantically searching for the taxes in the kitchen. Ethel comes in.)
Ethel: “Hi Lucy!”
Lucy: “Don’t get panicky Ethel.”
Ethel: “Lucy, you didn’t get the taxes done yet?”
Lucy: “Don’t get panicky Ethel.”
(Lucy goes into the other room and drawers opening and closing are heard. Lucy comes back in.)
Lucy: “Ethel, get panicky.”
Ethel: “Lucy, you didn’t do your taxes yet? Why did you wait?”
Lucy: “I didn’t have anything to do today so I said sure. Ethel, help me find these forms.”
Ethel: “Ok.”
(They do and after making the house a complete mess it is 11p and they are mentally defeated.)
Lucy: “It’s no use Ethel.” (Starting to cry, yells): “I’M GOING TO JAIL AND ROT IN THERE.”
Ethel: “Oh Lucy.”
(The boys come home.)
Fred: “Hi girls.”
(Lucy cries. Ricky is visably upset at the condition of the house.)
Ricky: “Lucy, I want a splanstion.”
Lucy: “Ok, I will give you a splanation. I didn’t get the taxes done. I’m going to jail.”
(Fred collapses on the couch.)
Ricky: “Sure you din’t. I took them down to get them done a few days ago. I said to you that I would and you thanked me. You were in the phone with the Wednesday Afternoon Fang & Claw Soceity.”
Lucy: “Ewwwwww.”
(All of them advance toward Lucy.)
Lucy: “Now everyone. Everyone…”
(Lucy gets a chair to combat them. The end.)
(Lucy & Ricky are at the dining room table.)
Ricky: “Lucy, when are you goin’ to take the Income Tax forms down to R&H Block for them to do?”
Lucy: “Ricky, that’s H&R Block.”
Ricky: “Look I don’t care what type of block it is. When are you going to do it?”
Lucy: “When I feel like it. I’m tired.”
Ricky: “Tired? It’s 8a.”
(The Mertzes come in. Fred is all worried.)
Ethel: “Hi everyone.”
Fred: “Hello Ricky?”
Ricky: “Hello you two. Listen Fred, I got a question. When do you take your taxes down to H&R Block?”
Fred: “Never.”
Ricky: “Never?”
Ethel: “You think that Fred would spend money to get his taxes done? He always orders me to do it alone with our ancient calculators.”
(Ricky laughs.)
Lucy: “Ethel, we got to go downtown. We will be right back.”
Ricky: “What about the taxes?”
Lucy: “I’ll do them later.”
(On April 15th, Lucy is frantically searching for the taxes in the kitchen. Ethel comes in.)
Ethel: “Hi Lucy!”
Lucy: “Don’t get panicky Ethel.”
Ethel: “Lucy, you didn’t get the taxes done yet?”
Lucy: “Don’t get panicky Ethel.”
(Lucy goes into the other room and drawers opening and closing are heard. Lucy comes back in.)
Lucy: “Ethel, get panicky.”
Ethel: “Lucy, you didn’t do your taxes yet? Why did you wait?”
Lucy: “I didn’t have anything to do today so I said sure. Ethel, help me find these forms.”
Ethel: “Ok.”
(They do and after making the house a complete mess it is 11p and they are mentally defeated.)
Lucy: “It’s no use Ethel.” (Starting to cry, yells): “I’M GOING TO JAIL AND ROT IN THERE.”
Ethel: “Oh Lucy.”
(The boys come home.)
Fred: “Hi girls.”
(Lucy cries. Ricky is visably upset at the condition of the house.)
Ricky: “Lucy, I want a splanstion.”
Lucy: “Ok, I will give you a splanation. I didn’t get the taxes done. I’m going to jail.”
(Fred collapses on the couch.)
Ricky: “Sure you din’t. I took them down to get them done a few days ago. I said to you that I would and you thanked me. You were in the phone with the Wednesday Afternoon Fang & Claw Soceity.”
Lucy: “Ewwwwww.”
(All of them advance toward Lucy.)
Lucy: “Now everyone. Everyone…”
(Lucy gets a chair to combat them. The end.)