View Full Version : The Honeymooners gang returns home from another wedding:


Frank Gannucci
09-02-2021, 10:30 AM
(The wives arrive at the car that Ralph burrowed from Freddie Muller.)

Alice: “So Trixie, once again our immature husbands acted up and drank too much at a wedding.”

Trixie: “Did you see Ralph dance like Jackie Gleason? I thought he was going to pass out.”

Alice: “Especially since he already drank too much by then. Here they come now.”

(The husbands come by. They are wearing VERY LOUD shirts.)

Ralph: “Ok girls. We admit it. We drank too much at the wedding again. We just hope that that blabbermouth of your mother hasn’t spread it all over social media.”

Ed: “She did Ralph.”

Ralph: “That BUM!”

Ed: “Well, at least I didn’t jump into the pool fully clothed like you did Ralph.”

Alice: “My mother said that when she saw it, she thought all the water would fall out.”

(Ed laughs.)

Ralph (yells): “SHUT UP!”

Alice: “My mom said you looked like a beached whale.”

(Ed laughs.)

Ralph (yells): “YOU WANT A FAT LIP NORTON? YOU WEREN’T PERFECT EITHER. YOU STRIPPED DOWN TO YOUR BOXERS.”

Ed: “At least I only weigh 165 pounds. The last time you weighed that much is when you had your baby pictures taken.”

Ralph (yells): “OKAY! PUT ‘EM UP NORTON!”

(The girls try to separate them.)

Trixie: “You boys have got to act your age.”

Ralph: “All right. Sorry.”

Ed: “Me too.”

Ralph: “At least we had fun.”

(They both sing a song about having fun.)

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: “Thank you. The Miami Beach crowds are the BEST. GOOD NIGHT.”

(Crowd cheers.)