View Full Version : A Honeymooners Halloween:


Frank Gannucci
10-28-2020, 06:48 AM
(The Kramdens and Nortons are at Target.)

Ralph: "This is a great place to get our customes ready for the Raccoon Halloween contest. I know the only way to win the grand prize which is $1,000 Alice."

Alice: "I hope that Target has what you want Ralph. It's just that I don't think that they have costumes in XXXXXL."

Ralph: "Ooooooh, you are a riot Alice. A real riot."

(The Kramdens and Nortons are in the costume section.)

Alice: "This is a great costume for me."

(Alice picks out a sexy nurse costume.)

Ralph: "Where is the rest of that costume? If you were that, your knees will be showing."

Alice: "My knees have to show."

Ralph: "Not a sexy nurse that is married to me."

(Ralph & Ed see an astronaut costume. It's the last one. They both race to get it.)

Ralph; "Get yoru hands off of that Norton. That is MY costume."

Ed: "Your costume? I saw it first."

Ralph: "I SAW it first."

Ed: "I don't think this costume will fit you. If it does, you wouldn't be an astronaut. You will be a PLANET."

Ralph (yells):: "PREPARE TO GO TO THE MOON NORTON."

Alice: "Why do you two have to act like babies?"

Trixie: "Yeah, this is Halloween. It's almost the start of the XMas season."

Ralph: "I want to win the $1,000. I need it."

Ed: "To buy food for yourself?"

Ralph (yells): "ARRRGHHHH!"

Man (yells): "HEY MAN, IF THEY DON'T HAVE WHAT YOU WANT, I CAN CHECK OTHER TARGET STORES TO SEE IF THEY HAVE THEM. NO FIGHTING."

Ed: "He's right Ralph."

Ralph: "He is right."

(They both accidentally rip the costume in half.)

Ralph (yells): "NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DID."

Ed: (yells): "LOOK AT WHAT I DID? HOW ABOUT YOU? YOU SHOULD HAVE LET GO OF IT."

(They both fight and they have to be separated.)

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: "Thank you. GOOD NIGHT."

(Crowd cheers.)