This topic has been bugging me for quite some time and I would like your guy's feedback/ and opinions on it. Anyways, here's the story: One of my friends thinks he's gay and he has read that Gay/Lesbian people are born gay naturally. But in other stuff he has read it says Gay/lesbian people DO have to the choice of being gay. What do you think? It is a matter of choice or at birth?

I think it's a matter of choice.

You're born with certain feelings. It's just a chioce if you want to admit those feelings and come out with it. Or at least I think so. So please don't bash me if I'm wrong.

I think it's what a person is, and they cant change...even tho I dont think it's necessarily a BORN thing...like, I dont think babies are gay or straight when they are born, but they will become that way when they are older, but I dont think people can choose to be that....if that made any sence at all....;)

Originally posted by Ricky Ricardo
You're born with certain feelings. It's just a chioce if you want to admit those feelings and come out with it. Or at least I think so. So please don't bash me if I'm wrong.

Chris, I'm not going to bash you. This topic is just a learning thing.
Besides, you have a right to your opinion/statement. I'm not going to violate it. But thanks for posting your statement on this topic! You can post more if you want.

mistake post....foget this

accidental post again...:)

Originally posted by Ricky Ricardo
You're born with certain feelings. It's just a chioce if you want to admit those feelings and come out with it. Or at least I think so. So please don't bash me if I'm wrong.

Ya d00d...I agree wif ya.

Originally posted by Ricky Ricardo
You're born with certain feelings. It's just a chioce if you want to admit those feelings and come out with it. Or at least I think so. So please don't bash me if I'm wrong.

That's what I think also.

Originally posted by Ricky Ricardo
You're born with certain feelings. It's just a chioce if you want to admit those feelings and come out with it. Or at least I think so. So please don't bash me if I'm wrong.

exactly what i think...

but someone told me if you're gay you're born with more estrogen than testosterone...is this true?

How old are the books your friend has been reading if there real old of course that's what there gonna say people thought like that back then, people who weren't even experts. I personally think that people are born that way and some people get that way if they are raped, molested stuff like that. From what I've heard people who are molested and are gay are the kind of people who sleep around and that's not just people who are gay if a girl is molested she may end up sleeping with alot of guys. But if you are just born that way like me you are the kind of person who wants a loving and caring realationship and doesn't sleep around. (that's just what I heard)

Plus look at the facts why in the world would someone choose to be gay just so there family can disown them and society tell them they are sick. I think here in America we are so simple minded and are not up for change. In many countries being gay is not as a big deal as here in the US.

Well, it's basic human instinct to be attracted(actually MATE with) to the opposite sex. But then again, how a person is affected by his or her environment through life can shape their sexual preferences. Honestly, I can't really exactly say what makes a person gay, since I simply don't know.
Although I really doubt a person chooses to be gay.

There have been some studies on this subject, and many scientists and behavior speciallists are saying homsexuality is something you are born with.
I don't seee how it can be something you "learn," like any other trait or skill we pick up as we go through life.

It's definately not a choice. A person does not choose to be gay although, like Ricky Ricardo said, it is a persons choice whether he or she acts on their feelings.
I don't think being gay is determined from birth. In my experience, you really only start to realise that you are gay when you become a teenager and, you know, you start thinking about sex and stuff.
But it definately isn't a choice. Being gay has a lot of stigma attached to it and - despite what some people seem to think - society is really not that accepting of gay people yet. If it was possible to choose between being "normal" or being teased and singled-out all the time, I'd go for the first option anyday!

Originally posted by Ricky Ricardo
You're born with certain feelings. It's just a chioce if you want to admit those feelings and come out with it. Or at least I think so. So please don't bash me if I'm wrong.

Ditto-wise

I think it's not really a born thing because you don't see a baby talking about sexuality, but it's like whatever the person finds attractive I guess.

It is MOST DEFINITELY not a choice.

Originally posted by Will and Grace Fanatic
I think here in America we are so simple minded and are not up for change. In many countries being gay is not as a big deal as here in the US.

I know exactly what you are saying. At school some of my friends were passing around a petition to have some kind of club for people that get teased a lot to join this certain club and just talk about their feelings. It was for the benefit for this one guy. He was gay and he was basically treated like ****. The guy couldn't even walk down the hall without people throwing junk at him or hassling him. I didn't have any classes with the guy, so I didn't really know him all that well. The sad thing is he was a freshman, so you can imagine the pure hell he will be put through during his high school years.

I don't know really. If it is something already instilled in a person when they are born then why does God claim that being gay is a sin, etc in the Bible? Why would God make a person that way if he claims to not accept it? That's what doesn't make any sense to me. Just my two cents on it . . .

Originally posted by Jenny
He was gay and he was basically treated like ****. The guy couldn't even walk down the hall without people throwing junk at him or hassling him. The sad thing is he was a freshman, so you can imagine the pure hell he will be put through during his high school years.
Isn't that absolutely terrible? I can feel nothing but utter sympathy for that boy because he didn't choose to be gay. No one with a brain in their head would. Why? So they can suffer the insufferable conditions that this boy, for example, has and without a doubt continues to face? No one wants to be known as an "outcast." And being so young, that boy has so much more life to live and so much more **** that he'll go through. That's almost inevitable. People need to open their minds and open their eyes significantly more than they currently do, otherwise the hatred will intensify and cause much more dammage than ever before.

Originally posted by tootieismyfav
I don't know really. If it is something already instilled in a person when they are born then why does God claim that being gay is a sin, etc in the Bible? Why would God make a person that way if he claims to not accept it? That's what doesn't make any sense to me. Just my two cents on it . . .

Because the Bible is full of stupid contradictions.
But that's a whole different topic.......

Originally posted by Mossopp
Because the Bible is full of stupid contradictions.
But that's a whole different topic.......

That is another thing my friend is confused about. He has heard from his friends, family, church, ect. that being gay is a sin (in the Bible) and that you will burn in hell if you're gay. I really don't know why stuff like this happens to people. It is really hard on them. At times, I feel real bad for my friend.

Originally posted by LucyFan


That is another thing my friend is confused about. He has heard from his friends, family, church, ect. that being gay is a sin (in the Bible) and that you will burn in hell if you're gay. I really don't know why stuff like this happens to people. It is really hard on them. At times, I feel real bad for my friend.

What church? At my church, they teach us that it's okay if you're gay, as long as you don't act on it, but then again it's a sin to sleep with someone who you're not married to even if you're not gay, but like Mossopp, I don't want to get into that on this topic. I already said everything in the religion topic.

Originally posted by Ricky Ricardo

At my church, they teach us that it's okay if you're gay, as long as you don't act on it,

Whats the point then? Thats basically the same as not accepting it except they're saying you can think about being gay and etc.

Originally posted by tootieismyfav


Whats the point then? Thats basically the same as not accepting it except they're saying you can think about being gay and etc.

Good point! That is part of confusion my friend has with the church on this issue. He feels at times the church doesn't make sense whatsoever. But I guess it depends on how the person looks at things.

Originally posted by tootieismyfav


Whats the point then? Thats basically the same as not accepting it except they're saying you can think about being gay and etc.

That's not what I mean. What I mean is sex. They can do whatever normal couples without sex do.

Originally posted by Ricky Ricardo


That's not what I mean. What I mean is sex. They can do whatever normal couples without sex do.

In other words, they could be together but not have sex whatsoever.

Originally posted by LucyFan


In other words, they could be together but not have sex whatsoever.

Yea, but it's the same for any couple, gay or not. If it's a man and woman, they can not have sex until they are married because it is considered a sin. I believe in abstinence. I believe in waiting for that one person you marry to have sex with. The only problem is that in our society does not accept gay marraiges. So basically what my church teaches us is that for any couple, you can not have sex unitl your married. Not just gay couples. The marrige thing is the whole issue that our society doesn't matter. This is what I believe, so please don't go saying I'm wrong. It may be for some people, but for me, it's a belief.

Originally posted by Ricky Ricardo


Yea, but it's the same for any couple, gay or not. If it's a man and woman, they can not have sex until they are married because it is considered a sin. I believe in abstinence. I believe in waiting for that one person you marry to have sex with. The only problem is that in our society does not accept gay marraiges. So basically what my church teaches us is that for any couple, you can not have sex unitl your married. Not just gay couples. The marrige thing is the whole issue that our society doesn't matter. This is what I believe, so please don't go saying I'm wrong. It may be for some people, but for me, it's a belief.

That is what I have been taught too. I don't consider it wrong or right. It should only matter to eye the of beholder (meaning the person) of what they think is right thing to do. I, myself, believe that the person should wait til marriage to have sex. Does it make it right or wrong? . . . NO. It is just a belief.

Originally posted by LucyFan


That is what I have been taught too. I don't consider it wrong or right. It should only matter to eye the of beholder (meaning the person) of what they think is right thing to do. I, myself, believe that the person should wait til marriage to have sex. Does it make it right or wrong? . . . NO. It is just a belief.

For me, marriage before sex is wrong, for either couple, gay or not. But this is just my belief that sex before marriage is considered a sin.

I think homosexuality is something you're born with. I don't understand why the Bible says that it's a sin to be gay. I have been wrestling with that contradiction more than any other found in the Bible. But why on Earth would someone choose to be gay?

It's disgusting the way American sosiety treats homosexuals!

I personally beleive that there are two kinds of gay: There's the kind where the person is only sexually homosexual. Like if a it's a girl, she might be attracted to other girls, but she likes playing dolls, and wearing dresses and other things girls like to do. And if it's a boy, they might be attracted to other boys, but they still play a lot of sports etc. Then there's the kind where the gay person acts like the people of the other sex. I call that mentaly gay. I think that a person must indentify which kind of gay they are. If they are sexually gay, if they want to, they can see if they like the people of the other sex. If they are mentaly gay, they can see if they can do things that their sex usualy does, but it is their choice to do that. If you are gay, there's no reason to think that it is your choice to be it. When your life progresses, you might be around people who you think are attractive. Like if you are a boy, you might see older brothers bare shirted, or you might see them in the shower. And if you are a girl you might see your mother on occasion. Even in your teens, you still have those moments. Boys and girls probably feel attracted to their friends when they take a shower at school. Maybe you might see a person of your sex naked, and you might feel a feeling and think a thought. But IMHO, if that DOES happen, you shouldn't be worried. Being gay isn't like being an alien who looks like ALF and ET combined........so I think that it is a matter of your surroundings and feelings. Now I think I'm Dear Abby...........lemme go look at today's column lol.