A Honeymooners New Year's Day:

All (yells): "HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

(All the couples hug and kiss.)

Ralph: "Happy New Year Alice."

Alice's Mom: "I see that Ralph hasn't been drinking a lot yet. He needs to lose that beer belly."

(Ralph is getting more agitated. He starts to drink more and more and more. He now is drunk.)

Ralph (drunkenly, yells): "HAPPY NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW YEAR EVERYONE! I WILL NOW COOK A PIZZA PIE ON THE STOVE."

(Ralph cooks the pizza pie on the record player because he thinks it is the stove. He starts disrobing much to Alice's horror.)

Alice (yells): "RALPH, STOP IT."

Ralph (drunkenly): "WHY ALICE? I AM JUST GIVING THESE PEOPLE A SHOW. THEY WANT TO SEE ME DO THE FULL MONTY. AS A MATTER OF FACT, I WILL DO IT BY LOOKING OUT THAT WINDOW."

(Ralph does. A cop sees him and arrests him. The following day, he gets released from jail at the jail after Alice posts bond.)

Alice: "Ralph, waht do you have to say for yourself?"

Ralph: "Don't steam me up Alice. Bang! Zoom!"

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: "Thank you. I wasn't really naked you know. As you can see, we used smoke and mirrors so to speak druing that 'nude' scene. I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year as we ring in the new decade. The new roaring 20s."

(Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: "Good night everyone."

(Crowd cheers.)