(Ralph & Ed are watching an Army veteran raise the flag on a flag pole.)

Ralph: "Look at that Army veteran Norton. I heard that he is a veteran of the Afghan war. The longest war in US history."

Ed: "He should be getting special treatment. He is a sweet kid."

Ralph: "Also sadly we may be at war with North Korea soon. A nuclear war. I hope knot. If we do go, I know that we will win. I think all the other war veterans will praise the US troops."

Ed: "Those veterans deserve to be honorary members of the Raccoon Lodge."

Ralph: "I agree. I don't want another war."

Ed: "It also seems to me that Veterans Day is only popular during war time."

Ralph: "It sure is. We should all be thankful for all those war veterans. I am thankful for you too Norton because you were in a war. Mentally and physically, war veterans are the toughest people that we know. I know I would have a hard time being at war."

Ed: "Well, I don't know how tough I am. I was only at war for a few days before I ran home because I missed my favorite cartoons. Also, I would think that judging by your physique Ralph, I don't think you would be able to pass the phys..."

Ralph (yells): "SHUT UP!" (normally): "Well, anyway I am thankful for all the war veterans including you Norton. Without war veterans, we wouldn't be able to live the life that we live today."

Ed (blows his nose because he is so happy): "So true Ralph. You are a sweet kid."

(They both sing a song about war veterans loving the USA.)

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: "Thank you. I just want to wish all the war veterans a Happy Veterans Day. We wouldn't be here without you people."

(Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: "As usual, the Miami Beach crowds are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!"

(Crowd cheers.)