View Full Version : Going Down to Little Stempington (A New Tricks/Suburban Shootout crossover fanfic)


Race's Girl
12-02-2016, 10:35 AM
Chapter 1- A High Speed Car Chase

It was a cool day in Little Stempington and a 1979 Audi Quattro was riding throguh the village. Real Wild Woman by Bad Faith was playing in the background.

"Little Stempington," Jack Halford said as he looked at Gerry Standing who was driving. "Mary would've loved it here and... GERRY, WATCH OUT!"

At that moment, Jack grabbed the wheel and swerved the car out of the way of
an oncoming car.

"There's no one back there," said Gerry as he looked around and saw nothing. "Jack, I sometimes think you've really lost it."

"Sod that, Gerry." smiled Jack.

"Bugger what I said," said Gerry. "I know you've lost it and why are we in a place like this?"

"Brian said there's an unsolved murder in this town, Gerry," said Jack. "Jeremy Hazeldene said Little Stempington needs all the help it can get to overcome this crime wave-"

"Who was the victim?" asked Gerry.

"Danielle Holloway," said Jack. "17 years old, found murdered on Little Stempington Common in 1989. That murder is still unsolved."

"You know, I like that about you!" said Gerry changing the subject.

"What 'that' are we talking about?" asked Gerry.

"That the Fonz in you never died," replied Gerry. "You don't see that thing in today's cops!"

"Glad to see you're in the spirit!" said Jack as Gerry really gunned the engine and the Audi Quattro started to catch up with the maruading car which moved fast down the road.

"Breaking the law in a town like this," said Gerry looking at the car. "How rebelious."

"Kind of strange really," sighed Jack. "Out running whoever's driving that car in a 1979 Audi Quattro just to spite them."

The cars continued until they passed the Tudor Kettle and stopped outside a modern house. Jack and Gerry got out of the car, knocked on the door and stood aside as a woman with shoulder length brown hair and hazel eyes opened the door.

"Jack, Gerry," said the woman. "Glad to see you guys again."

"Hello, Joyce," said Jack. "Me and Gerry came to here to crack the unsolved murder of a 17 year old called Danielle Holloway in 1989."

"Unsolved murder?" asked a rich Yorkshire voice as Superintendant Jeremy Hazeldene rushed to the door. "That sort of thing never happens in... Jack, Gerry."

"Great to see you too, Jez." said Gerry cockily as Joyce and Jack laughed. A few seonds later, the doorbell rang so Joyce went to open it and found Barbara DuPrez, Pam Draper and Margaret Littlefair standing outside.

"Who are your friends, Joyce?" asked Margaret.

"Jack and Gerry, meet Barbara DuPrez, Pam Draper and Margaret Littlefair," said Joyce. "Girls, meet Jack Halford and Gerry Standing."

"Good to see you two, Boys," said Barbara. "You two know Jeremy's really managed to bring this town under control these last 3 years. Besides, you should know we're not all good people. There are 3 women we should look out for."

"Oh, Mrs DuPrez," said Jack blushing. "You sound a lot like our good friend Brian Lane."

"That's very nice of you two to show up," said Pam not taking her eyes off Gerry. "Thank God you're both here. It's so nice to be able to have officers form London to visit. Gerry's accent is from London but where's Jack from, Newcastle?"

"He's for Sunderland, darling." said Gerry never taking his eyes off Pam.

"That's dangerously close to Newcastle, Pam," said Joyce. "I'm sure that they can call you girls by your first names. Do you guys mind that? "

"Well, I certainly hope so." replied Pam.

"Where are Bill and Jewel gone?" asked Joyce. "They should be home by now."

Suddenly, the door opened and a young man with curly brown hair and green eyes entered with a young woman with curly brown hair and hazel eyes and the young man said "Jack, Gerry, glad to see you guys again."

"So, you two must be Jack Halford and Gerry Standing," said Jewel as she pointed at Bill. "Bill's mentioned you two a lot."

Race's Girl
12-03-2016, 07:58 AM
Chapter 2- Singing at Rockin' Roxy's

That night at Rockin' Roxy's bar, the only rock 'n' roll joint in Little Stempington, Jack, Gerry, Joyce, Jeremy, Barbara, Ray, Pam and Margaret entered and were quickly ushered to a booth. As they headed for it, Pam placed a reassuring hand on Joyce's shoulder.

"Don't worry, Joyce," said Pam. "You're a much stronger person now. You'll be fine."

"Thanks." said Joyce smiling at Pam.

At that moment, Rockin' Roxy, the redehaded owner of the place, went onto the stage and said "Okay, everyone! It's Karaoke time!"

"Karaoke?" asked Jack. "Oh, that sounds like fun! C'mon, Gerry. Let's give it a shot!"

"Ready when you are, Jack." said Gerry as he and Jack left the table.

"I never thought I'd be grateful for karaoke," said Barbara. "Wait a minute. Karaoke?"

Suddenly, the lights dimmed. Jack and Gerry appeared on the stage and sang together.

Cat Man's a-coming, you better look out,
Cat Man's a-comin', running about,
Cat Man's a-comin', lookin' for a girl,
Better hide your sister, man!

"C" is for the crazy hairdo that he wears around,
"A" is for the arms that he'll sneak around your waist,
"T" is for the taste of lips belong to you,
Cat Man, CAT MAN!
(Yeah...git it...go!)

"M" is for the mean things that this mean man does,
"A" is for a-lot-of hearts that he has ever broke,
"N" is for the names of the list you may be on,
Cat Man, CAT MAN!
(Rock!)

Cat Man a-lookin' for a woman all day long,
Ah-better watch out 'cause he is in you midst,
Ah-better watch out 'cause or you're gonna be kissed,
Better watch out 'cause he is in you midst,
Cat Man, CAT MAN! (Yeah)

Better watch out 'cause I'm the Cat Man,
CAT MAN!

The audience cheered as Jack and Gerry left the stage and sat back at their table.

"Wow, Jack, Gerry," said Jeremy. "You were both great. Tomorrow, we'll get down to that case Brian sent you here to work on."

"Thanks, Jeremy!!" said Jack and Gerry together.

"So that's another thing why Brian wanted us to come to Little Stempington," Jack told Gerry. "Why didn't he tell us?"

"Beats me," said Gerry. "I think he wanted it to be a surprise, you know!"

"Problems, Hilary?" asked a 5'10" brunette as a 5'7" blonde and a 5'4" blonde watched as Jack, Gerry, Joyce, Jeremy, Barbara, Ray, Pam and Margaret all left Rockin' Roxy's.

"No, just two officers from London," said Hilary Davenport. "We can get rid of them in a few minutes."

"What should we do with those two, ladies?" Camilla Diamond said. "They must be here to investigate the unsolved murder of Danielle Holloway at the hands of Ricky Hanson on July 4th 1989."

"That's true, Camilla," said Lillian Gordon-Moore. "That was amazing. Did you really kill her and blame Ricky Hanson?"

"I never killed anyone until I saw that Darren kid writing on my front room wall in 1999, Lillian!" replied Camilla as she saw Joyce, Barbara and Gerry's cars leave Rockin' Roxy's.

"Lillian, how could you be so sodding stupid?" asked Hilary. "Do you also realise that Ricky Hanson is also after those two newbies?"

"I can't believe this," said Camilla. "We might use them as bait to lure Barbara and Joyce into my biggest trap ever."

"What do we do with them, Camilla?" asked Hilary.

"You know what I always say," replied Camilla. "A couple of hostages never hurt anything. Let's go, girls!"