Right now, I'm feeling extremely guilty about talking the talk and holding grudges.

I also feel like I'm the most hopeless person I know when it comes to being happy and I have a lot of anxiety about the future even though I know I'm going to be fine.

I'm super scared of dedicating a lot of time to tasks and goals, and getting close to people.

People seem to like me but that doesn't bring happiness.

My parents just got divorced and I'm a wreck living under the same roof as my older brother who I've never gotten along with; he almost got me arrested earlier this year, and I was abused by Orlando Police Department (Known for being extremely untrustworthy by most people who've dealt with them.) thanks to him.

The house I live in is an unsafe place for me to express myself, and I've been trying to get a job for over a year now so I can move out and I've had no success.

My thoughts are contradicting and so much meaning gets assigned to them.

In a nutshell, I'm holding myself responsible for the outcome of how disappointing my life is and I don't know what to do about it.

Now enough about me, how do you feel at the moment?

Best wishes,
Chris Ferguson