TIME TO TELL
A “The Division” Fan Fiction
By Kat

CD DeLorenzo thought back to the time when she was fifteen years old, she had gone through hell that year and hadn’t told anyone. Now, 17 years later she still keeps her secret bottled up inside. Now sometimes, she’ll cry herself to sleep at night because of the thoughts that still haunt her.

When CD was 10 years old, her parents got a divorce. When she was fifteen, her mom was dating a guy that she really liked, and CD really wanted it to work out between them. One night, this guy came into her room, and through her down on her bed. Told her not to move, when she tried to scream he put a pillow over her face so no one could hear. She told him to stop, but he took off her pants and removed her underwear, the whole time saying if she didn’t cooperate he’d tell her mom what she did. She had done nothing, but she knew her mother would believe him more than her. That night was by far the worst night of her life. She had been raped at the tender age of 15, and never told anyone.

Now, CD DeLorenzo is 32 years old, and Inspector for the SFPD, has a great partner-Nate Basso, and is trying to rebuild her life. She is divorcing her husband, and trying to show everything’s fine to her friends, Magda Ramirez, Jinny Exstead, Captain McCafferty, and Raina Washington…oh yes, Nate too. But she has problems with that sometimes.

She had just gotten off work and had an OK day. She didn’t have the best case…a rape case. She hates rape cases; they are almost impossible for her to work. She always freaks and thinks of what kind of sick person does this to anyone, no matter what age. Then she thinks back to Ricky, the guy who raped her, and says to herself, 'that kind of sick person…one who makes everyone think he’s nice then goes off making young people’s lives miserable.'

Not to mention how hard this one was for her, the girl who was raped was 15 years old and named Melissa. CD couldn’t get over how young this girl was. At least she told…CD never did, she couldn’t bring herself to do so; she didn’t want her mom to know that it was all her fault Ricky broke up with her.
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I had to get a fan fiction going! It has been sooooo long since I've written one! anyone like this?

great fic!!!!!!!!!!! add more soon:)

CD sat by herself on the bed. She had to tell someone about what happened to her. Sure, it had been 17 years ago, but when would she stop thinking its all her fault? It was hard enough to make it through the day, looking at Melissa Schneider, seeing the fear in her eyes. Did she really trust anyone right now? Was she comfortable talking to CD or Nate right now?

Nate looked at CD several times, in a weird way. CD knew she was uptight around him when he was talking about what had happened to Melissa, he asked her what was wrong several times, but she wouldn’t talk. She was too scared to tell anyone yet. She didn’t think it would help any, people would probably just say, “Oh my gosh, CD I’m so sorry.” Like they could do anything about it. She didn’t want sympathy; she just wanted to tell someone. She needed someone to know.

‘Why do I torture myself?’ she often asks herself, ‘none of this was my fault. I didn’t ask him to rape me. I did nothing wrong. Why do I always think it was?’

CD knew she needed to get some sleep; she had to rest for a while. She had to work tomorrow, and it was nearing midnight. She had to get up early and she couldn’t go in with red eyes, and looking like something was horribly wrong. So she lay down in bed, wishing that she felt more comfortable with her past, or better yet it never happened. She, as she does most every night, cried herself to sleep.

The next morning, CD slept through her alarm. When she woke up a half hour lat she knew she’d be late to work, unless she hurried. She quickly showered and dried her hair and brushed through it. She threw on some clothes that looked decent. It was her baby blue sweater and black pants. She put on her makeup; grabbed her badge and gun. Quickly she grabbed an apple, and was out the door.

On her drive to work she thought about what had happened to her 17 years ago. Now she wishes she had told, Ricky was probably still out there somewhere and she didn’t know where. He could come up to her at any moment and who knows what she’d do. She kept think “What If…” when there are a hundred What Ifs to ask. If she’d have tried harder to fight him off, if she’d screamed louder, if she’d told her mom, if…

CD DeLorenzo arrived right on time to work. She walked over to her desk and sat down right across from Nate, she put her head in her hands and sighed. If only she’d gone to bed sooner, not spent her whole night crying and wondering. She shouldn’t have let this get to her, but how could she not? She was still scared he’d come up to her at any minute and threaten her, or…do something worse, make her worst nightmare come to life…again.
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I know this isn't very good so far...but it'll get better and I've typed quite a bit but I'm revising it right now so I'll post about this much at a time for a while.

Originally posted by hockeybabe528
great fic!!!!!!!!!!! add more soon:)

DITTO MORE PLEASE!

more!

AAAHHH!!!!!!!!!! A CD FANFIC!!!!! YAY! HAVEN'T READ ONE IN A LONG WHILE. YAY! ADD MORE!!! :D

YAY!!!! Ya doing a fic!!!!!!!!!!!! AWESOME!! More! :)

“CD, earth to CD!” Nate was trying to get her attention. She was off in her own little world, thinking back to that one night, the night that made her feel awful, the night that had ruined her life. She often traveled into that world when she was investigating a rape case, she was in that world when she was too stressed from something to concentrate, “CD, are you even alive anymore?” Nate was about to crack up. He’d been calling to her for about five minutes and she wasn’t responding to anything. Finally she heard him and jumped, when she thinks back to that time, she sees every image as vividly as she did then. It’s almost as if she is being raped all over again, as if someone is purposely making her feel this way. When it’s just her tormenting herself.

“Sorry Nate, what’s up?”
“Nothing, I’d just been trying to talk to you for the past five minutes and you wouldn’t respond…are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I just didn’t get any sleep last night.”
”Why?” He asked, wondering why she jumped when she figured out he was talking to her.
“I hate rape cases Nate, they just make me uptight and well make me on edge.” She had a little bit of a ‘don’t you get I don’t want to talk about it?’ sound in her voice.
“CD, if something’s wrong you can tell me, you do know that right?”
“Right…but I don’t want to talk about it, OK? Because it’s just something that you don’t need to know.” She looked at him, he felt kind of hurt, he though she’d trusted him, “Look, Nate, this is just something I kind of want to keep to myself. It’s not something that should be publicly said. OK?”
“Fine CD, I just wanted you to know you could talk to me.” He told her.
“Thanks, Nate, but I just don’t want to talk right now.” She gave him a fake smile and walked away, she needed five minutes to herself. CD got into the bathroom and sat down, not sure what to think. She couldn’t get Ricky’s picture out of her head, she couldn’t stop thinking about that look of fear in Melissa’s eyes.

Just then Jinny and Magda walked in. CD was in her own little world again, reliving the nightmare over and over in her head. She still thought it was her fault. She still believed that she did something to cause him to rape her. Maybe he thought she wanted him to. Magda and Jinny were looking at CD; she looked pale, her skin was so white and she was just staring off into space.
“CD, are you okay?” Magda asked, hoping to get her attention. Magda looked at Jinny, and she just shrugged. Neither of them knew what was wrong with CD. “CD, you can tell us if there’s something wrong. You do know that, right?” Magda asked again, trying to reassure her.
“Yeah, I know that. I’ve got to talk to all of you later, like, I don’t know…I’ve got to talk to Cap.”
“CD, what’s wrong?” Jinny asked.
“You’ll find out soon enough.”

CD got up and left the bathroom, leaving Jinny and Magda there looking at each other. She stepped back into the division, and walked into Captain Kate McCafferty’s without knocking.
“CD, you want to talk?”
“Yeah, I need to talk to everyone, you, Nate, Magda, Jinny, and Raina, as soon as possible.”
“About what? CD is something wrong?” Kate asked her, CD was never very open and now she wanted to talk to everyone, it was absurd.
“Just something I’ve needed to get out in the open for 17 years now and haven’t done.”
“Fine, now would work.” Kate stepped out of her office, “Raina, Nate, Jinny, and Magda, my office now.”

“This must be what she was upset about in the bathroom.” Magda told Jin.
“Yeah.”
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Everyone filed into the room, Jin and Mag being the only ones who sort of knew what this was about. Nate, being the last one in shut the door.

“OK, well now that everyone is in here…I want you all to know something that well, I just need to tell someone. You guys are, well, as close to family as I have right now so I want to talk to you.” CD stopped and looked at them, she needed to tell, but wasn’t sure she could, “When I was ten, my parents got a divorce, then five years later my mom started going out with this guy she really liked.” CD stopped; she was coming to the part that she really didn’t want to tell. But she knew she had to. “Late one night he came to my room. He threw me down on my bed and told me not to move. I tried to scream, but he put a pillow over my face so no one could hear.” She stopped again; her heart was wedged in her throat. She wanted to cry; she didn’t know why she wanted to tell in the first place. “I told him to stop, he didn’t listen. Took off my pajama pants and underwear, and, and, and…he raped me. He told me if I didn’t cooperate he’d tell my mom what I did. But I hadn’t done anything.” CD, who had been standing at the time, had to sit down. She couldn’t stand it; something she’d wanted to get out in the open for so long, and now she wasn’t sure if she’d done the right thing. She was still scared.

Everyone just stared at CD, no one was sure what to say. None of them had ever been told that one of their friends was raped before, and now she had. True it was seventeen years ago, but still it was hard.

Magda was the first to speak up, “CD, are you okay now?”
CD just looked at her, “Uh, sure…it did happen seventeen years ago…but I still have nightmares about it. No, I’m not okay.” CD started crying, she was trying so hard to hold back, but it was just impossible. But no one could hold it against her; Kate stood up and drew the blinds then instead of sitting behind her desk where she was before she sat down next to CD.

“CD, you’ve got to listen to me,” Kate said to her, “Do you need some time off? Do you want to stop the rape case?”
”No,” CD was starting to calm down, “I can handle it. Just getting it out in the open was the hard part.”
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More?

This is AWESOME!!! MORE!

How can u ask if we want more OF COURSE WE WANT MORE!!

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Dis is great!!! There just aren't enough C.D. fics, are there? *shakes head* Oh, well...posting more would cheer me up...haha :D

Everyone looked at CD and one by one told her how sorry they were and made sure she knew she could talk to them any time. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to, but couldn’t say no, so she just said thank you.

When everyone had left and she was still in Kate’s office, CD looked at Captain McCafferty, “Captain, thanks.”
“For what?”
“Letting me get that out. I don’t know, but I’ve had so many problems and with this, I just needed to tell someone. I hadn’t told anyone. You guys are the first to find out.”
”Well, you needed it. I wasn’t just going to let one of my top inspectors wallow in self pity and not tell anyone their problems, am I?”
”No, Cap, you weren’t. I think I need to get to work now. I’ve held everyone up for about 30 minutes already.” CD laughed. She knew that everything would start getting a little better, bit-by-bit. But people would probably walk on eggshells around her.
“Just remember, if you ever need to talk, or if you need time off, come talk to me. We’ll be able to work something out.” Kate told her, “Hey, just take some time to sit down and laugh now that you’ve told. Have some fun. I don’t know what you’ve been through, but you’ve probably been through hell more than once due to this! Have some fun. Go to a movie with someone, but don’t just keep it bottled up inside.”
“Thanks again.” With that CD walked out and over to Nate, “Hey, call Melissa…see if she can talk to us today.”

Nate just looked at her, amazed as to what she’s gone through and still putting up with it all. It had to be hard enough for her already, going through a divorce, but now just coming out about a rape that happened seventeen years ago, “Fine CD, but one thing first.”
“What?”
“Go to a movie with me tonight or tomorrow.”
”As in a date? Or as in just helping me deal with this. Because honestly, if this is a date then no, but….’
“It’s helping you deal, it’ll help to get out. We’ll go to a comedy or something.”
“I can go for that tomorrow, call Melissa.”
“Yes ma’am.” Nate said with a smirk on his face. He then grabbed a piece of paper and called Melissa Schneider. CD just laughed at him, he looked like such an idiot. But in reality she knew she was attracted to him, but not ready to go out.

About fifteen minutes later, Nate was off the phone with Melissa, “So…can she get together with us?”
“Yeah she’s coming by right now.” Nate looked at her, she completely expected it, “Will you be able to talk to her?”
“Nate, I may have been raped 17 years ago, but I think I can keep my cool.”
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