Frank Gannucci
03-19-2014, 10:12 PM
Honeymooners TV Schedule (3/22-4/4):
Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Audrey Meadows as Alice Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Joyce Randolph as Trixie Norton.
(WPIX) & (WPIX HD (aka CWHD))
(CC?)
Note: The Honeymooners is not in HD in syndication. So WPIX puts a black picture frame around the show.
Sat. March 22, 2014 11p #031 (aka #139) - "On Stage": "Polo ponies." "On Stage" (originally telecast April 28, 1956) actually began, says co-writer Leonard Stern, "with that one word...and we built a whole sketch around it." And it's that single word---pronounced by Norton (Art Carney) to rhyme with monopolies---that has almost single-handedly made this a favorite among Honeymooners fans. The episode begins with Ralph getting a juicy part in a play being mounted by the Raccoon Lodge's Women's Auxiliary. Suddenly Ralph is strutting around like the Barrymore of Bensonhurst and entertaining dreams that a Hollywood producer in the audience will offer him a contract. But before the actual performance, there's a rehearsal with Norton---and that word---to contend with.
11:30p #032 (aka #140) - "Dial J For Janitor": Ralph can't seem to pipe down about the failures of his building's janitor. Then he finds out that the position pays $150 a month with free rent---and decides to take the job himself. Now the most gripes are coming from Norton, who says he hasn't had water in his apartment for so long that he's beginning to "see mirages." Mr. Johnson: Luis Van Rooten. Mrs. Manicotti: Zamah Cunningham.
Sun. March 23, 2014 11p #033 (aka #141) - "Opportunity Knocks, But": When Mr. Marshall asks him for a lesson in shooting pool, Ralph believes that his social visit to his boss's Park Avenue home is the cue for his finally advancing in the company. But it's Norton who racks up points in "Opportunity Knocks But," which originally aired May 5, 1956. The pool lesson just gets under way when Norton---not Ralph---starts offering suggestions about making improvements at the company. Impressed, Marshall offers him a job as "Bus Driver Supervisor." Marshall says he likes a man who can think on his feet, but as an enraged Ralph later tells Alice: "Norton works in the sewer. He has to think on his feet; if he sat down he'd drown." But Norton, who's thinking of accepting the offer, tells his buddy not to worry. "As long as I am an executive at that bus company," he tells Ralph, "you are sure of being a bus driver as long as you live."
11:30p #034 (aka #142) - "A Man's Pride": Ralph is too proud to tell a seemingly successful old friend that he drives a bus, so he says he "runs things" at the company in the last Honeymooners episode of the "classic 39," which originally ran from 1955 to '56. CLASSIC KRAMDEN- Ralph's reaction to the dinner check.
Sat. March 29, 2014 11p #035 (aka #143) - "Unconventional Behavior": Ralph and Norton become joined at the wrists when Norton tries out his "trick handcuffs" in "Unconventional Behavior," which originally aired May 12, 1956. Aboard a train en route to the lodge's convention in Minneapolis, the guys look forward to "five days of hilarity" and try out some of the novelty items that Norton's brought along. But when Norton's handcuffs won't unlock (there is no key), he and Ralph become closer than they'd like. This scenario yields some memorable physical humor, including Norton trying to take his coat off and the guys trying to figure out some way to sleep in upper and lower berths. It also provides one of the series' all-time lines. "Mind if I smoke?" Norton asks a frustrated Ralph. "I don't care if you burn," Ralph fires back.
11:30p #036 (aka #144) - "The Bensonhurst Bomber": An argument in the pool hall and a joke about a man's name figure in "The Bensonhurst Bomber," which originally aired Sept. 8, 1956. Of all the guest characters on The Honeymooners, few names are more recognizable to fans than "Harvey," or, as Ralph pronounces it, "Har-vee!" In fact, it's that exaggerated pronunciation that gets Ralph in hot water when the towering bully Harvey challenges Ralph to a fight at Kelsey's Gym. As the showdown approaches, a nervous Ralph believes a wiser plan might be to leave town, but Norton insists he has to fight Harvey, especially since they're closing the pool hall in Ralph's honor. "If I fight that Harvey," Ralph replies, "they'll be closing it in my memory."
Sun. March 30, 2014 11p #037 (aka #145) - "The Safety Award": Ralph is honored with an award for being "the safest bus driver in the city" and plans to take Alice and the Nortons to the ceremony at City Hall. But his big day is plagued with problems, culminating with Ralph having an accident in his friend's car. Ever the optimist, Norton offers a distressed Ralph some sewer-worker words of wisdom: "When the tides of life turn against you, and the current upsets your boat, don't waste those tears on what might have been, just lay on your back and float." Mr. Martin: Frank Marth.
11:30p #038 (aka #146) - "Ralph's Big Mouth" (aka "Mind Your Own Business"): Norton gets fired from his job in the sewer after taking Ralph's advice about demanding a promotion. Finding something new won't be easy, Norton says, because, after all, a sewer worker is like a brain surgeon---"we're both s pecialists." Still, after a couple of weeks, he finds work selling irons door-to-door. And when he tells his pal that he made $40 his first day on the job, Ralph suddenly contemplates leaving the bus company to become a salesman with Norton's company.
(MeTV):
Note: In some markets, MeTV affiliates may not show the Honeymooners due to the fact that some local stations in those markets may also broadcast the Honeymooners and they may take exception to MeTV wanting to show the show as well as the fact that they may want to show other shows.
Sun. March 23, 2014 2a #010 (aka #118) - "Hello Mom": Ralph and Alice Kramden (Jackie Gleason, Audrey Meadows) squabble over the impending arrival of Ralph's mother-in-law in this classic, and ultimately touching, episode. The king is told that his castle is soon to be invaded by Alice's mom. Ralph painfully remembers how his mother-in-law said at his wedding, "I'm not losing a daughter, I'm gaining a ton," and refuses to let her visit. But when Alice stands up to him and insists her mother's coming, Ralph decides to move in with the Nortons until the visit's over. Humor and poignancy meet in a conclusion that once again shows Alice, who sees beyond Ralph's insecurities, to be the bigger person.
2:30a #011 (aka #119) - "The Deciding Vote": Ralph's in a tight two-man election for the position of Raccoon convention manager and the deciding vote belongs to Norton. The episode contains a classic sight gag involving Ralph trying to clean a vacuum cleaner after it has failed "the oatmeal test."
Sun. March 30, 2014 2a #012 (aka #120) - "Something Fishy": "I catch the fish," Ralph tells Alice, "you cook the fish. The only time we're together is when we eat the fish." Alice, however, has other ideas about Ralph and his lodge brothers worming their way out of taking the wives on the annual fishing trip. Ralph and Norton are desperate, so they angle for a way to leave Alice and Trixie behind.
2:30a #014 (aka #122) - "The Man From Space": Intending to take home first prize at the Raccoon Lodge's costume ball, Ralph---unable to wangle a loan from Norton---puts together his own costume and dubs himself "The Man From Space" in a memorable episode that was originally telecast Dec. 31, 1955. Angry with Norton (who's going as the Frenchman who "built the sewers of Paris") and obsessed with winning, Ralph appropriates an assortment of household items---including a faucet, a pot, a radio tube and the icebox door---to create a costume that will, he says, make Norton's rented outfit look like "a piece of French cheesecloth." The episode contains a classic example of Jackie Gleason's gift for ad-libbing when, unexpectedly; a piece of Ralph's costume falls off. "Let me have that," he improvises to Alice. "That's my denaturizer."
(WCIUDT4) (MeTOO in Chicago)
All times are Central.
Mon. March 24, 2014 10:30p #50 (aka #154) - *“Love Letter” ('56 version): Ralph fears Norton and Alice are having an affair after finding a love letter from Norton he thinks is intended for Alice.
Tue. March 25, 2014 10:30p "No Episode Title": Ralph schemes to improve his lot in life.
Wed. March 26, 2014 10:30p #51 (aka #55/#40) – “‘Guest Speaker’/‘Lost Job’”: (For “Guest Speaker”): Ralph keeps getting interrupted while practicing his speech for the Raccoon Lodge meeting. (For “Lost Job”): Ralph is sure he's been fired when he gets a pink slip in his paycheck.
Thu. March 27, 2014 10:30p #52 (aka #80) – “Goodbye Aunt Ethel (Part One)”: Ralph must sleep on a cot in the kitchen when Alice's Aunt Ethel comes to visit. Ralph pretends he has a bad back to force her out, but Aunt Ethel stays to nurse Ralph back to health.
Fri. March 28, 2014 10:30p #013 (aka #121) - "'Twas The Night Before XMas": The Kramdens exchange presents in a Christmas episode with an O. Henry twist. Ralph is particularly proud of the gift he has for Alice: a hairpin box made of 2000 matchsticks that, he's been told, was smuggled from the palace of the Emperor of Japan. DON'T MISS - This classic retelling of "The Gift of the Magi."
Note: According to zap2it.com, WCIU is only showing part one and not part two. That might be a mistake, so here's the description for part two.
#53 – “Goodbye Aunt Ethel (Part Two)”: Ralph and Ed introduce Aunt Ethel to the neighborhood butcher, hoping the two will get married and Aunt Ethel will leave.
Mon. March 31, 2014 10:30p #54 (aka #63) - *“Letter to the Boss” ('53 version) : Ralph mistakenly thinks a he's been fired and, with Norton's help, writes a nasty letter to his boss. After mailing the letter, Ralph finds out he's been promoted and schemes to get the letter back.
CLASSIC QUOTE -"Homina, homina, homina"
Tue. April 1, 2014 10:30p #55 (aka #100) - *“The Adoption”: Ralph and Alice decide to adopt a baby, but first they have to pass inspection at the adoption agency.
Wed. April 2, 2014 10:30p #56 (aka #85) – “The People's Choice (Part One)”: When Ralph heroically captures a murderer on his bus, he is asked to run for public office.
Thu. April 3, 2014 10:30p #57 – “The People's Choice (Part Two)”: Alice thinks the men who asked Ralph to run for public office are crooks who intend to use Ralph as a stooge, but Ralph doesn't believe her.
Fri. April 4, 2014 10:30p #58 (aka #48/#50) - “‘Norton Moves In’/‘Dinner Guest’”: (For “Norton Moves In”): The Nortons move in with the Kramdens while their apartment is being painted. Trixie and Alice take the bedroom, while Norton and Ralph attempt to sleep on a cot in the kitchen. (For “Dinner Guest”): Ralph invites a man from the bus company to dinner so he can discuss promotion. There's only one problem -every time Ralph attempts to mention the promotion Alice changes the subject.
*: This episode has been edited HEAVILY.
Credit goes to zap2it.com, the Honeymooners Lost Episodes DVD Box Set, the old honeymooners.net, tvland.com & John K's Book To The Moon.
Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Audrey Meadows as Alice Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Joyce Randolph as Trixie Norton.
(WPIX) & (WPIX HD (aka CWHD))
(CC?)
Note: The Honeymooners is not in HD in syndication. So WPIX puts a black picture frame around the show.
Sat. March 22, 2014 11p #031 (aka #139) - "On Stage": "Polo ponies." "On Stage" (originally telecast April 28, 1956) actually began, says co-writer Leonard Stern, "with that one word...and we built a whole sketch around it." And it's that single word---pronounced by Norton (Art Carney) to rhyme with monopolies---that has almost single-handedly made this a favorite among Honeymooners fans. The episode begins with Ralph getting a juicy part in a play being mounted by the Raccoon Lodge's Women's Auxiliary. Suddenly Ralph is strutting around like the Barrymore of Bensonhurst and entertaining dreams that a Hollywood producer in the audience will offer him a contract. But before the actual performance, there's a rehearsal with Norton---and that word---to contend with.
11:30p #032 (aka #140) - "Dial J For Janitor": Ralph can't seem to pipe down about the failures of his building's janitor. Then he finds out that the position pays $150 a month with free rent---and decides to take the job himself. Now the most gripes are coming from Norton, who says he hasn't had water in his apartment for so long that he's beginning to "see mirages." Mr. Johnson: Luis Van Rooten. Mrs. Manicotti: Zamah Cunningham.
Sun. March 23, 2014 11p #033 (aka #141) - "Opportunity Knocks, But": When Mr. Marshall asks him for a lesson in shooting pool, Ralph believes that his social visit to his boss's Park Avenue home is the cue for his finally advancing in the company. But it's Norton who racks up points in "Opportunity Knocks But," which originally aired May 5, 1956. The pool lesson just gets under way when Norton---not Ralph---starts offering suggestions about making improvements at the company. Impressed, Marshall offers him a job as "Bus Driver Supervisor." Marshall says he likes a man who can think on his feet, but as an enraged Ralph later tells Alice: "Norton works in the sewer. He has to think on his feet; if he sat down he'd drown." But Norton, who's thinking of accepting the offer, tells his buddy not to worry. "As long as I am an executive at that bus company," he tells Ralph, "you are sure of being a bus driver as long as you live."
11:30p #034 (aka #142) - "A Man's Pride": Ralph is too proud to tell a seemingly successful old friend that he drives a bus, so he says he "runs things" at the company in the last Honeymooners episode of the "classic 39," which originally ran from 1955 to '56. CLASSIC KRAMDEN- Ralph's reaction to the dinner check.
Sat. March 29, 2014 11p #035 (aka #143) - "Unconventional Behavior": Ralph and Norton become joined at the wrists when Norton tries out his "trick handcuffs" in "Unconventional Behavior," which originally aired May 12, 1956. Aboard a train en route to the lodge's convention in Minneapolis, the guys look forward to "five days of hilarity" and try out some of the novelty items that Norton's brought along. But when Norton's handcuffs won't unlock (there is no key), he and Ralph become closer than they'd like. This scenario yields some memorable physical humor, including Norton trying to take his coat off and the guys trying to figure out some way to sleep in upper and lower berths. It also provides one of the series' all-time lines. "Mind if I smoke?" Norton asks a frustrated Ralph. "I don't care if you burn," Ralph fires back.
11:30p #036 (aka #144) - "The Bensonhurst Bomber": An argument in the pool hall and a joke about a man's name figure in "The Bensonhurst Bomber," which originally aired Sept. 8, 1956. Of all the guest characters on The Honeymooners, few names are more recognizable to fans than "Harvey," or, as Ralph pronounces it, "Har-vee!" In fact, it's that exaggerated pronunciation that gets Ralph in hot water when the towering bully Harvey challenges Ralph to a fight at Kelsey's Gym. As the showdown approaches, a nervous Ralph believes a wiser plan might be to leave town, but Norton insists he has to fight Harvey, especially since they're closing the pool hall in Ralph's honor. "If I fight that Harvey," Ralph replies, "they'll be closing it in my memory."
Sun. March 30, 2014 11p #037 (aka #145) - "The Safety Award": Ralph is honored with an award for being "the safest bus driver in the city" and plans to take Alice and the Nortons to the ceremony at City Hall. But his big day is plagued with problems, culminating with Ralph having an accident in his friend's car. Ever the optimist, Norton offers a distressed Ralph some sewer-worker words of wisdom: "When the tides of life turn against you, and the current upsets your boat, don't waste those tears on what might have been, just lay on your back and float." Mr. Martin: Frank Marth.
11:30p #038 (aka #146) - "Ralph's Big Mouth" (aka "Mind Your Own Business"): Norton gets fired from his job in the sewer after taking Ralph's advice about demanding a promotion. Finding something new won't be easy, Norton says, because, after all, a sewer worker is like a brain surgeon---"we're both s pecialists." Still, after a couple of weeks, he finds work selling irons door-to-door. And when he tells his pal that he made $40 his first day on the job, Ralph suddenly contemplates leaving the bus company to become a salesman with Norton's company.
(MeTV):
Note: In some markets, MeTV affiliates may not show the Honeymooners due to the fact that some local stations in those markets may also broadcast the Honeymooners and they may take exception to MeTV wanting to show the show as well as the fact that they may want to show other shows.
Sun. March 23, 2014 2a #010 (aka #118) - "Hello Mom": Ralph and Alice Kramden (Jackie Gleason, Audrey Meadows) squabble over the impending arrival of Ralph's mother-in-law in this classic, and ultimately touching, episode. The king is told that his castle is soon to be invaded by Alice's mom. Ralph painfully remembers how his mother-in-law said at his wedding, "I'm not losing a daughter, I'm gaining a ton," and refuses to let her visit. But when Alice stands up to him and insists her mother's coming, Ralph decides to move in with the Nortons until the visit's over. Humor and poignancy meet in a conclusion that once again shows Alice, who sees beyond Ralph's insecurities, to be the bigger person.
2:30a #011 (aka #119) - "The Deciding Vote": Ralph's in a tight two-man election for the position of Raccoon convention manager and the deciding vote belongs to Norton. The episode contains a classic sight gag involving Ralph trying to clean a vacuum cleaner after it has failed "the oatmeal test."
Sun. March 30, 2014 2a #012 (aka #120) - "Something Fishy": "I catch the fish," Ralph tells Alice, "you cook the fish. The only time we're together is when we eat the fish." Alice, however, has other ideas about Ralph and his lodge brothers worming their way out of taking the wives on the annual fishing trip. Ralph and Norton are desperate, so they angle for a way to leave Alice and Trixie behind.
2:30a #014 (aka #122) - "The Man From Space": Intending to take home first prize at the Raccoon Lodge's costume ball, Ralph---unable to wangle a loan from Norton---puts together his own costume and dubs himself "The Man From Space" in a memorable episode that was originally telecast Dec. 31, 1955. Angry with Norton (who's going as the Frenchman who "built the sewers of Paris") and obsessed with winning, Ralph appropriates an assortment of household items---including a faucet, a pot, a radio tube and the icebox door---to create a costume that will, he says, make Norton's rented outfit look like "a piece of French cheesecloth." The episode contains a classic example of Jackie Gleason's gift for ad-libbing when, unexpectedly; a piece of Ralph's costume falls off. "Let me have that," he improvises to Alice. "That's my denaturizer."
(WCIUDT4) (MeTOO in Chicago)
All times are Central.
Mon. March 24, 2014 10:30p #50 (aka #154) - *“Love Letter” ('56 version): Ralph fears Norton and Alice are having an affair after finding a love letter from Norton he thinks is intended for Alice.
Tue. March 25, 2014 10:30p "No Episode Title": Ralph schemes to improve his lot in life.
Wed. March 26, 2014 10:30p #51 (aka #55/#40) – “‘Guest Speaker’/‘Lost Job’”: (For “Guest Speaker”): Ralph keeps getting interrupted while practicing his speech for the Raccoon Lodge meeting. (For “Lost Job”): Ralph is sure he's been fired when he gets a pink slip in his paycheck.
Thu. March 27, 2014 10:30p #52 (aka #80) – “Goodbye Aunt Ethel (Part One)”: Ralph must sleep on a cot in the kitchen when Alice's Aunt Ethel comes to visit. Ralph pretends he has a bad back to force her out, but Aunt Ethel stays to nurse Ralph back to health.
Fri. March 28, 2014 10:30p #013 (aka #121) - "'Twas The Night Before XMas": The Kramdens exchange presents in a Christmas episode with an O. Henry twist. Ralph is particularly proud of the gift he has for Alice: a hairpin box made of 2000 matchsticks that, he's been told, was smuggled from the palace of the Emperor of Japan. DON'T MISS - This classic retelling of "The Gift of the Magi."
Note: According to zap2it.com, WCIU is only showing part one and not part two. That might be a mistake, so here's the description for part two.
#53 – “Goodbye Aunt Ethel (Part Two)”: Ralph and Ed introduce Aunt Ethel to the neighborhood butcher, hoping the two will get married and Aunt Ethel will leave.
Mon. March 31, 2014 10:30p #54 (aka #63) - *“Letter to the Boss” ('53 version) : Ralph mistakenly thinks a he's been fired and, with Norton's help, writes a nasty letter to his boss. After mailing the letter, Ralph finds out he's been promoted and schemes to get the letter back.
CLASSIC QUOTE -"Homina, homina, homina"
Tue. April 1, 2014 10:30p #55 (aka #100) - *“The Adoption”: Ralph and Alice decide to adopt a baby, but first they have to pass inspection at the adoption agency.
Wed. April 2, 2014 10:30p #56 (aka #85) – “The People's Choice (Part One)”: When Ralph heroically captures a murderer on his bus, he is asked to run for public office.
Thu. April 3, 2014 10:30p #57 – “The People's Choice (Part Two)”: Alice thinks the men who asked Ralph to run for public office are crooks who intend to use Ralph as a stooge, but Ralph doesn't believe her.
Fri. April 4, 2014 10:30p #58 (aka #48/#50) - “‘Norton Moves In’/‘Dinner Guest’”: (For “Norton Moves In”): The Nortons move in with the Kramdens while their apartment is being painted. Trixie and Alice take the bedroom, while Norton and Ralph attempt to sleep on a cot in the kitchen. (For “Dinner Guest”): Ralph invites a man from the bus company to dinner so he can discuss promotion. There's only one problem -every time Ralph attempts to mention the promotion Alice changes the subject.
*: This episode has been edited HEAVILY.
Credit goes to zap2it.com, the Honeymooners Lost Episodes DVD Box Set, the old honeymooners.net, tvland.com & John K's Book To The Moon.