View Full Version : The Honeymooners taking a trip to Mexico


Frank Gannucci
03-19-2014, 10:04 PM
(The Kracdens and Nortons are aboard a ship ready to go to Mexico.)

Ralph: "What a great idea I had Norton."

Alice: "You had? I was the one that thought of it Ralph."

Ralph: "Yeah and I AGREED to it."

(The girls roll their eyes.)

Ralph: "First, we are ready to dock for the boat that is unfortunately leaving this great action city, Miami Beach."

(Audience cheers.)

Ed: "First stop we are going os Key West than we go to Mexico."

Ralph: "I came dressed for the occassion."

(Ralph takes out a Mexican sombrero.)

Ralph: "Well, do I look like a gay cabrello?"

Trixie: "Let me see you walk."

(Audience laughs hysterically.)

Ralph: "I don't swing that way Trix. Ha ha."

Ed: "This a great trip. Too be sailing over water that goes into sewer systems."

(They all get on board.)

(Later on, they are in their stateroom which is big.)

Ralph: "No remember Alice. I am the KING of this stateroom. Remember that. I don't care if the Nortons are staying with us. I am big enough to be king...DON'T YOU DARE SAY IT ALICE."

(Ralph looks out the window and starts to get seasick.)

Ed: "Hey Raloh, it looks like your seasick. I got the poem for you to keep your calm. 'When the tides of life turn against you and the current upsets your boat/Don't waste those tears on what might have been/Just lay on your back and float.'"

(Ralph gets sicker than ever. They both sing a song about feeling better. After that song, Ralph feels better.)

Ralph: "Boy, thank you Norton. Now I feel better. Now, I am going to look out of the port hole."

(Ralph does. A pause.)

Ed: "Ralph, how is the view?"

(Ralph throwing up food is heard.)

Man (yells): "HEY! LOOK AT THAT DUDE OVER THERE. HE MUST HAVE HURLED 300 POUNDS OF FOOD."

(Ed laughs.)

Ralph (yells): "PUT 'EM UP NORTON! PUT 'EM UP NORTON!"

(The girls separate the two. They go on to enjoy their trip.)

(Jackie Gleason walks on stage. Audience applauds.)

Jackie: "Thank you. The Miami Beach audiences are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!"

(Audience cheers.)