Frank Gannucci
10-02-2013, 10:57 PM
Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Audrey Meadows as Alice Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Joyce Randolph as Trixie Norton.
(WCiUDT4) (MeTOO in Chicago)
All times are Central.
Mon. Oct. 7, 2013 10:30p #008 (aka #115) - "Pal O' Mine": A great friendship is strained after a ring t hat Norton had planned to give a co-worker winds up stuck on Ralph's finger. The episode concludes with a classic hospital scene that contains a memorable one-word ad-lib by Norton, who's saying good-bye to a doctor. Teddy Oberman: Ned Glass. Doctor: John Seymour. Nurse: Abbie Lewis.
Tue. Oct. 8, 2013 10:30p (also Sat. Oct. 12, 2013 at 11p Eastern on WPIX & WPIX HD) #009 (aka #116) - "Brother Ralph": A layoff at the bus company prompts Ralph and Alice to add up their total savings from all of their accounts ($12.83). That's reason enough for Alice to get a job, leaving Ralph to take care of the cooking and cleaning. But Ralph becomes really steamed after he discovers that her boss looks like a matinee idol---and that Alice told him that Ralph is her brother.
Wed. Oct. 9, 2013 10:30p #010 (aka #117) - "Hello Mom": Ralph and Alice Kramden (Jackie Gleason, Audrey Meadows) squabble over the impending arrival of Ralph's mother-in-law in this classic, and ultimately touching, episode. The king is told that his castle is soon to be invaded by Alice's mom. Ralph painfully remembers how his mother-in-law said at his wedding, "I'm not losing a daughter, I'm gaining a ton," and refuses to let her visit. But when Alice stands up to him and insists her mother's coming, Ralph decides to move in with the Nortons until the visit's over. Humor and poignancy meet in a conclusion that once again shows Alice, who sees beyond Ralph's insecurities, to be the bigger person.
Thu. Oct. 10, 2013 10:30p #011 (aka #118) - "The Deciding Vote": Ralph's in a tight two-man election for the position of Raccoon convention manager and the deciding vote belongs to Norton. The episode contains a classic sight gag involving Ralph trying to clean a vacuum cleaner after it has failed "the oatmeal test."
Fri. Oct. 11, 2013 10:30p #012 (aka #119) - "Something Fishy": "I catch the fish," Ralph tells Alice, "you cook the fish. The only time we're together is when we eat the fish." Alice, however, has other ideas about Ralph and his lodge brothers worming their way out of taking the wives on the annual fishing trip. Ralph and Norton are desperate, so they angle for a way to leave Alice and Trixie behind.
Mon. Oct. 14, 2013 10:30p #014 (aka #121) - "The Man From Space": Intending to take home first prize at the Raccoon Lodge's costume ball, Ralph---unable to wangle a loan from Norton---puts together his own costume and dubs himself "The Man From Space" in a memorable episode that was originally telecast Dec. 31, 1955. Angry with Norton (who's going as the Frenchman who "built the sewers of Paris") and obsessed with winning, Ralph appropriates an assortment of household items---including a faucet, a pot, a radio tube and the icebox door---to create a costume that will, he says, make Norton's rented outfit look like "a piece of French cheesecloth." The episode contains a classic example of Jackie Gleason's gift for ad-libbing when, unexpectedly; a piece of Ralph's costume falls off. "Let me have that," he improvises to Alice. "That's my denaturizer."
Tue. Oct. 15, 2013 10:30p #015 (aka #122) - "A Matter of Record": In "A Matter of Record" (originally telecast Jan. 7, 1956), Ralph surprises Alice with tickets to a hit Broadway mystery, but with her mother coming "all the way from Bensonhurst" for a visit, she won't go. " Where's Bensonhurst, in New Zealand or something?" Ralph snaps back, upset that Alice is forsaking him for a visit from his nemesis. "She won't be in this apartment three minutes before she starts an argument," Ralph says. With that, Alice's mother arrives and Ralph proceeds to set an alarm clock for three minutes. Sure enough, she quickly insults Ralph about his weight, chides Alice for not marrying "a good provider" and, as the final straw, spills the beans about the ending of the play. Just as the alarm clock rings, Ralph erupts ("You are a blabbermouth!") and throws his mother-in-law out. But Alice leaves with her, prompting Ralph to take Norton's suggestion and record an apology to Alice in hopes of winning her forgiveness.
Wed. Oct. 16, 2013 10:30p #016 (aka #123) - "Oh My Aching Back": After telling Alice he was too tired to leave the apartment, Ralph---on the eve of his company physical---goes bowling, throws his back out and comes home hunched over, and looking, Norton says, like "the leaning tower of pizza."
Thu. Oct. 17, 2013 10:30p #017 (aka #124) - "The Baby-sitter": Ralph signals his displeasure when he learns that Alice had a telephone installed in the apartment. Then later, when he calms down, he overhears a telephone conversation and thinks that she is having an affair.
Fri. Oct. 18, 2013 10:30p 018 (aka #125) - "The $99,000 Answer": Ralph Kramden's get-rich-quick schemes were a Honeymooners staple, but the pipe dream in "The $99,000 Answer"---which originally aired Jan. 28, 1956---may be the funniest. Convinced that he'll triumph on a quiz show, popular-music expert Ralph (Jackie Gleason) intensely prepares at home, aided by piano-playing pal Norton (Art Carney), who warms up for each song with a few bars of a familiar Stephen Foster melody. Of course, the second he's on live TV, Ralph's bravado vanishes. Going into the classic Kramden meltdown---the eyes bugging, the lips quivering, the tongue stuttering "hummina-hummina"---he's asked, for his first question, to identify the composer of "Swanee River." DON'T MISS - - Norton's introduction to every song on the piano.
(MeTV)
This schedule is for some MeTV affiliates due to the fact that some local stations in some markets may also broadcast the Honeymooners and they may take exception to MeTV wanting to show the show as well as the fact that they may want to show other shows.
All times are Eastern.
Sun. Oct. 5, 2013 2a #031 (aka #138) - "On Stage": "Polo ponies." "On Stage" (originally telecast April 28, 1956) actually began, says co-writer Leonard Stern, "with that one word...and we built a whole sketch around it." And it's that single word---pronounced by Norton (Art Carney) to rhyme with monopolies---that has almost single-handedly made this a favorite among Honeymooners fans. The episode begins with Ralph getting a juicy part in a play being mounted by the Raccoon Lodge's Women's Auxiliary. Suddenly Ralph is strutting around like the Barrymore of Bensonhurst and entertaining dreams that a Hollywood producer in the audience will offer him a contract. But before the actual performance, there's a rehearsal with Norton---and that word---to contend with.
2:30a #034 (aka #141) - "A Man's Pride": Ralph is too proud to tell a seemingly successful old friend that he drives a bus, so he says he "runs things" at the company in the last Honeymooners episode of the "classic 39," which originally ran from 1955 to '56. CLASSIC KRAMDEN- Ralph's reaction to the dinner check.
Sun. Oct. 13, 2013 2a #037 (aka #144) - "The Safety Award": Ralph is honored with an award for being "the safest bus driver in the city" and plans to take Alice and the Nortons to the ceremony at City Hall. But his big day is plagued with problems, culminating with Ralph having an accident in his friend's car. Ever the optimist, Norton offers a distressed Ralph some sewer-worker words of wisdom: "When the tides of life turn against you, and the current upsets your boat, don't waste those tears on what might have been, just lay on your back and float." Mr. Martin: Frank Marth.
2:30a #039 (aka #146) - "Alice & The Blonde": Audrey Meadows said that she "loved" the episode titled "Alice and the Blonde" (originally telecast June 2, 1956), and it's easy to see why. For once, it's Alice who's fuming. It's all because of what happens at the home of one of Ralph's co-workers. Trying to ingratiate himself with Bert Weedemeyer (who Ralph thinks may become the bus company's new general manager), Ralph---with Norton by his side, naturally-heaps compliments on the man's wife, a ditsy platinum blonde who calls her husband "Twinkles." Ralph's fawning and flattery isn't amusing Alice, who'll have her revenge. Rita Weedemeyer: Freda Rosen. Bert: Frank Behrens.
(WPIX) & (WPIX HD (aka CWHD))
(CC?)
Note: The Honeymooners is not in HD in syndiication. So WPIX puts a black picture frame around the show.
Sat. Oct. 4, 2013 11p #020 (aka #127) - "Young At Heart": Ralph wants to prove to Alice that he's still young at heart by learning dances like the Big Apple and the Suzie Q., which prompts Norton to ask: "How can anyone so round be so square?" But he's still determined, so the Kramdens and the Nortons decide to make a night of it by going roller-skating. Ralph on wheels at the rink makes for one of the series' classic scenes. Another has Norton teaching Ralph how to do the Hucklebuck.
11:30p #021 (aka #128) - "A Dog's Life": Ralph gets another one of his half-baked ideas after he samples a tasty dish he found in his ice box in "A Dog's Life," which was originally telecast Feb. 18, 1956. Convinced that the unusual cracker-spread will satisfy the public's appetite for a snack that's new and different, Ralph asks his boss, Mr. Marshall, to taste the dish in the hope that he'll bankroll production. Ralph's even cooked up a name for the culinary delight: "KramMar's Delicious Mystery Appetizer." Marshall tries it and likes it, and asks Ralph if the recipe is exclusively his wife's or if Alice's mother helped out. "Anything she'd cook I wouldn't give to a dog," Ralph replies. But Marshall wants some other opinions, so he calls in his assistants for another taste test. After two of the assistants reveal the food to be dog food, Ralph is convinced that Alice got a dog and tries to put it back in the pound...only to fall in love with it and take possession of the other dogs who were over their respective limits and were going to be killed.
Sun. Oct. 5, 2013 11p #022 (aka #129) - "Here Comes The Bride": On the eve of his lodge brother Stanle y's marriage to Alice's sister, Ralph---the self-proclaimed "king of [his] castle"---gives his future brother-in-law marital advice. Furious that Stanley has agreed to live with Alice's parents, Ralph instructs him to put his foot down. "I don't want to argue," he tells Ralph, prompting Norton to reply: "If you don't want to argue, what are you getting married for?"
11:30p #023 (aka #130) - "Mama Loves Mambo": A dance teacher moves into the building and has all the husbands kicking up a fuss. Ralph and Norton had the idea that Carlos Sanchez was an old man who might like to relax with a game of checkers. He's not---bachelor Carlos is suave and handsome, and worse, is giving their wives mambo lessons in the Kramdens' apartment. Sanchez: Charles Korvin.
11:30p #024 (aka #131) - "Please Leave The Premises": Ralph refuses to pay a rent increase of $5 a month and, to avoid eviction, barricades himself, Alice and Norton in the apartment. Its war, says Ralph, and he's the general of their army. But after a few days without heat, and the food supply reduced to only celery, General Kramden hatches a plan to get fresh grub from the neighborhood delicatessen. Mr. Johnson: Luis Van Rooten.
Sun. Oct. 13, 2013 11p #025 (aka #132) - "House Beautiful" (aka "Pardon My Glove"): Alice accepts a department store's offer to redecorate their apartment for free. She wants to surprise Ralph, so she arranges to secretly meet with the decorator---who then makes the mistake of leaving one of his gloves in the flat. When Ralph finds the glove, he suspects Alice of having an affair. Andre: Alexander Clark.
11:30p #026 (aka #133) - "Young Man With A Horn": The discovery of his old cornet and an unexpected visit by a self-made millionaire prompt Ralph to wonder why he hasn't achieved more success and hit the "high note" in his life. As a result, he decides to make a list of his good points and do something to correct his bad ones.
*: This episode has been edited HEAVIILY.
Credit goes to zap2it.com, the Honeymooners Lost Episodes DVD Box Set, the honeymooners.net, tvland.com & John K's Book To The Moon.
(WCiUDT4) (MeTOO in Chicago)
All times are Central.
Mon. Oct. 7, 2013 10:30p #008 (aka #115) - "Pal O' Mine": A great friendship is strained after a ring t hat Norton had planned to give a co-worker winds up stuck on Ralph's finger. The episode concludes with a classic hospital scene that contains a memorable one-word ad-lib by Norton, who's saying good-bye to a doctor. Teddy Oberman: Ned Glass. Doctor: John Seymour. Nurse: Abbie Lewis.
Tue. Oct. 8, 2013 10:30p (also Sat. Oct. 12, 2013 at 11p Eastern on WPIX & WPIX HD) #009 (aka #116) - "Brother Ralph": A layoff at the bus company prompts Ralph and Alice to add up their total savings from all of their accounts ($12.83). That's reason enough for Alice to get a job, leaving Ralph to take care of the cooking and cleaning. But Ralph becomes really steamed after he discovers that her boss looks like a matinee idol---and that Alice told him that Ralph is her brother.
Wed. Oct. 9, 2013 10:30p #010 (aka #117) - "Hello Mom": Ralph and Alice Kramden (Jackie Gleason, Audrey Meadows) squabble over the impending arrival of Ralph's mother-in-law in this classic, and ultimately touching, episode. The king is told that his castle is soon to be invaded by Alice's mom. Ralph painfully remembers how his mother-in-law said at his wedding, "I'm not losing a daughter, I'm gaining a ton," and refuses to let her visit. But when Alice stands up to him and insists her mother's coming, Ralph decides to move in with the Nortons until the visit's over. Humor and poignancy meet in a conclusion that once again shows Alice, who sees beyond Ralph's insecurities, to be the bigger person.
Thu. Oct. 10, 2013 10:30p #011 (aka #118) - "The Deciding Vote": Ralph's in a tight two-man election for the position of Raccoon convention manager and the deciding vote belongs to Norton. The episode contains a classic sight gag involving Ralph trying to clean a vacuum cleaner after it has failed "the oatmeal test."
Fri. Oct. 11, 2013 10:30p #012 (aka #119) - "Something Fishy": "I catch the fish," Ralph tells Alice, "you cook the fish. The only time we're together is when we eat the fish." Alice, however, has other ideas about Ralph and his lodge brothers worming their way out of taking the wives on the annual fishing trip. Ralph and Norton are desperate, so they angle for a way to leave Alice and Trixie behind.
Mon. Oct. 14, 2013 10:30p #014 (aka #121) - "The Man From Space": Intending to take home first prize at the Raccoon Lodge's costume ball, Ralph---unable to wangle a loan from Norton---puts together his own costume and dubs himself "The Man From Space" in a memorable episode that was originally telecast Dec. 31, 1955. Angry with Norton (who's going as the Frenchman who "built the sewers of Paris") and obsessed with winning, Ralph appropriates an assortment of household items---including a faucet, a pot, a radio tube and the icebox door---to create a costume that will, he says, make Norton's rented outfit look like "a piece of French cheesecloth." The episode contains a classic example of Jackie Gleason's gift for ad-libbing when, unexpectedly; a piece of Ralph's costume falls off. "Let me have that," he improvises to Alice. "That's my denaturizer."
Tue. Oct. 15, 2013 10:30p #015 (aka #122) - "A Matter of Record": In "A Matter of Record" (originally telecast Jan. 7, 1956), Ralph surprises Alice with tickets to a hit Broadway mystery, but with her mother coming "all the way from Bensonhurst" for a visit, she won't go. " Where's Bensonhurst, in New Zealand or something?" Ralph snaps back, upset that Alice is forsaking him for a visit from his nemesis. "She won't be in this apartment three minutes before she starts an argument," Ralph says. With that, Alice's mother arrives and Ralph proceeds to set an alarm clock for three minutes. Sure enough, she quickly insults Ralph about his weight, chides Alice for not marrying "a good provider" and, as the final straw, spills the beans about the ending of the play. Just as the alarm clock rings, Ralph erupts ("You are a blabbermouth!") and throws his mother-in-law out. But Alice leaves with her, prompting Ralph to take Norton's suggestion and record an apology to Alice in hopes of winning her forgiveness.
Wed. Oct. 16, 2013 10:30p #016 (aka #123) - "Oh My Aching Back": After telling Alice he was too tired to leave the apartment, Ralph---on the eve of his company physical---goes bowling, throws his back out and comes home hunched over, and looking, Norton says, like "the leaning tower of pizza."
Thu. Oct. 17, 2013 10:30p #017 (aka #124) - "The Baby-sitter": Ralph signals his displeasure when he learns that Alice had a telephone installed in the apartment. Then later, when he calms down, he overhears a telephone conversation and thinks that she is having an affair.
Fri. Oct. 18, 2013 10:30p 018 (aka #125) - "The $99,000 Answer": Ralph Kramden's get-rich-quick schemes were a Honeymooners staple, but the pipe dream in "The $99,000 Answer"---which originally aired Jan. 28, 1956---may be the funniest. Convinced that he'll triumph on a quiz show, popular-music expert Ralph (Jackie Gleason) intensely prepares at home, aided by piano-playing pal Norton (Art Carney), who warms up for each song with a few bars of a familiar Stephen Foster melody. Of course, the second he's on live TV, Ralph's bravado vanishes. Going into the classic Kramden meltdown---the eyes bugging, the lips quivering, the tongue stuttering "hummina-hummina"---he's asked, for his first question, to identify the composer of "Swanee River." DON'T MISS - - Norton's introduction to every song on the piano.
(MeTV)
This schedule is for some MeTV affiliates due to the fact that some local stations in some markets may also broadcast the Honeymooners and they may take exception to MeTV wanting to show the show as well as the fact that they may want to show other shows.
All times are Eastern.
Sun. Oct. 5, 2013 2a #031 (aka #138) - "On Stage": "Polo ponies." "On Stage" (originally telecast April 28, 1956) actually began, says co-writer Leonard Stern, "with that one word...and we built a whole sketch around it." And it's that single word---pronounced by Norton (Art Carney) to rhyme with monopolies---that has almost single-handedly made this a favorite among Honeymooners fans. The episode begins with Ralph getting a juicy part in a play being mounted by the Raccoon Lodge's Women's Auxiliary. Suddenly Ralph is strutting around like the Barrymore of Bensonhurst and entertaining dreams that a Hollywood producer in the audience will offer him a contract. But before the actual performance, there's a rehearsal with Norton---and that word---to contend with.
2:30a #034 (aka #141) - "A Man's Pride": Ralph is too proud to tell a seemingly successful old friend that he drives a bus, so he says he "runs things" at the company in the last Honeymooners episode of the "classic 39," which originally ran from 1955 to '56. CLASSIC KRAMDEN- Ralph's reaction to the dinner check.
Sun. Oct. 13, 2013 2a #037 (aka #144) - "The Safety Award": Ralph is honored with an award for being "the safest bus driver in the city" and plans to take Alice and the Nortons to the ceremony at City Hall. But his big day is plagued with problems, culminating with Ralph having an accident in his friend's car. Ever the optimist, Norton offers a distressed Ralph some sewer-worker words of wisdom: "When the tides of life turn against you, and the current upsets your boat, don't waste those tears on what might have been, just lay on your back and float." Mr. Martin: Frank Marth.
2:30a #039 (aka #146) - "Alice & The Blonde": Audrey Meadows said that she "loved" the episode titled "Alice and the Blonde" (originally telecast June 2, 1956), and it's easy to see why. For once, it's Alice who's fuming. It's all because of what happens at the home of one of Ralph's co-workers. Trying to ingratiate himself with Bert Weedemeyer (who Ralph thinks may become the bus company's new general manager), Ralph---with Norton by his side, naturally-heaps compliments on the man's wife, a ditsy platinum blonde who calls her husband "Twinkles." Ralph's fawning and flattery isn't amusing Alice, who'll have her revenge. Rita Weedemeyer: Freda Rosen. Bert: Frank Behrens.
(WPIX) & (WPIX HD (aka CWHD))
(CC?)
Note: The Honeymooners is not in HD in syndiication. So WPIX puts a black picture frame around the show.
Sat. Oct. 4, 2013 11p #020 (aka #127) - "Young At Heart": Ralph wants to prove to Alice that he's still young at heart by learning dances like the Big Apple and the Suzie Q., which prompts Norton to ask: "How can anyone so round be so square?" But he's still determined, so the Kramdens and the Nortons decide to make a night of it by going roller-skating. Ralph on wheels at the rink makes for one of the series' classic scenes. Another has Norton teaching Ralph how to do the Hucklebuck.
11:30p #021 (aka #128) - "A Dog's Life": Ralph gets another one of his half-baked ideas after he samples a tasty dish he found in his ice box in "A Dog's Life," which was originally telecast Feb. 18, 1956. Convinced that the unusual cracker-spread will satisfy the public's appetite for a snack that's new and different, Ralph asks his boss, Mr. Marshall, to taste the dish in the hope that he'll bankroll production. Ralph's even cooked up a name for the culinary delight: "KramMar's Delicious Mystery Appetizer." Marshall tries it and likes it, and asks Ralph if the recipe is exclusively his wife's or if Alice's mother helped out. "Anything she'd cook I wouldn't give to a dog," Ralph replies. But Marshall wants some other opinions, so he calls in his assistants for another taste test. After two of the assistants reveal the food to be dog food, Ralph is convinced that Alice got a dog and tries to put it back in the pound...only to fall in love with it and take possession of the other dogs who were over their respective limits and were going to be killed.
Sun. Oct. 5, 2013 11p #022 (aka #129) - "Here Comes The Bride": On the eve of his lodge brother Stanle y's marriage to Alice's sister, Ralph---the self-proclaimed "king of [his] castle"---gives his future brother-in-law marital advice. Furious that Stanley has agreed to live with Alice's parents, Ralph instructs him to put his foot down. "I don't want to argue," he tells Ralph, prompting Norton to reply: "If you don't want to argue, what are you getting married for?"
11:30p #023 (aka #130) - "Mama Loves Mambo": A dance teacher moves into the building and has all the husbands kicking up a fuss. Ralph and Norton had the idea that Carlos Sanchez was an old man who might like to relax with a game of checkers. He's not---bachelor Carlos is suave and handsome, and worse, is giving their wives mambo lessons in the Kramdens' apartment. Sanchez: Charles Korvin.
11:30p #024 (aka #131) - "Please Leave The Premises": Ralph refuses to pay a rent increase of $5 a month and, to avoid eviction, barricades himself, Alice and Norton in the apartment. Its war, says Ralph, and he's the general of their army. But after a few days without heat, and the food supply reduced to only celery, General Kramden hatches a plan to get fresh grub from the neighborhood delicatessen. Mr. Johnson: Luis Van Rooten.
Sun. Oct. 13, 2013 11p #025 (aka #132) - "House Beautiful" (aka "Pardon My Glove"): Alice accepts a department store's offer to redecorate their apartment for free. She wants to surprise Ralph, so she arranges to secretly meet with the decorator---who then makes the mistake of leaving one of his gloves in the flat. When Ralph finds the glove, he suspects Alice of having an affair. Andre: Alexander Clark.
11:30p #026 (aka #133) - "Young Man With A Horn": The discovery of his old cornet and an unexpected visit by a self-made millionaire prompt Ralph to wonder why he hasn't achieved more success and hit the "high note" in his life. As a result, he decides to make a list of his good points and do something to correct his bad ones.
*: This episode has been edited HEAVIILY.
Credit goes to zap2it.com, the Honeymooners Lost Episodes DVD Box Set, the honeymooners.net, tvland.com & John K's Book To The Moon.