I thought it would be fun to come up with band names based on Unsolved Mysteries, please play along. :)

Here are some to get us started:
Gelatinous Goo
El Chupacabra and Eviscerated Sheep
Resurrection Mary & The Haunted Graveyards

Chair of Death and Spontaneous Combustion (metal)

Cheaper, but will do (possible Skynyrd cover band)

El Sickos (punk/crust)

Taco Bell Rendezvous

Wicked King Wicker and the Twenty-Two Disciples of Hell. If that's not metal I don't know what is.

Cheaper, but will do (possible Skynyrd cover band)

:lol:


Apparently there really IS a band called Taos Hum as I discovered years ago. I wonder if they've ever seen the segment. :p

The Wackers

Paul Polis and the Clean House Band

Update!

The Wackers

Paul Polis and the Clean House Band

Update!

Oh... or Update! At the Call Center... a Panic! At the Disco cover band!

Oh, and Paul Polis and the Clean House Band should totally be an old fashioned jug band, complete with washtub bass and washboard!

The majority of band names would be most befitting of Scandinavian death metal groups, such as "Omar and My Hell".

For some reason, the title of this thread made me envision a rousing rendition of "Convoy" as sung by C.W. Roddy!

Oh... or Update! At the Call Center... a Panic! At the Disco cover band!

Oh, and Paul Polis and the Clean House Band should totally be an old fashioned jug band, complete with washtub bass and washboard!

:lol: :lol: :lol: Paul on the kazoo.


Update!'s first concert album could be 'Live From the Telecenter.'

John Anderson/Dark Dante, as a David Bowie/Ziggy Stardust kind of deal.

Doc Swango and the Donuts.

The Smirks with Bob Bean.

I think Hotjock would be a good name for a Punk band or something LOL.

On the forbidden site, the Pat Farmer case is listed as "Satanic Grandma", which I always thought would be an awesome name for a metal band.

-Gertrude's Fruitcake

-Beastfinder

-Joseph Clark & The Amazing Technicolor Blackface

-Magic Rock


(in death metal voice) "We are Satanic Grandma!"

Update! At the Call Center..
The Smirks with Bob Bean.
Gertrude's Fruitcake
:lol:

The Entity, Crazy From Detroit, Chubby Behemoth (there's a Polish band with the latter name) and Plummer's Booty.

Just By Coincidence opening for Bar Floozy, with the standard (bad) country lyrics "He knew that I knew that he knew..." and "Susan, you're bein' bad again."

Magic Rock

It has all the elements of music!

The Blair Adams Project
The "Awesome" Boomgarden Duo
Omar and the Arsonists
Zip Guns 'N Roses
Cindy James and the Phantoms

Enormous Bonnie
Dede Sohus and The Secret Mission
Diane Brodbeck and her Prison Pen Pals
The Obia Man
Gripin' 'n Bitchin' (a country duo)

Wadada's Deformity

I thought I was gonna be clever and name a band The Ogo Pogos but:

There already are/were real bands called

ogopogos band

the black dahlias

d.b. cooper

Sohus Secret feat. Christopher Chichester

Howie Drummond and the $1.99 Breakfast Band (formerly Howie D's Elastic Band)

Joseph Prutzinowski reinvents himself as Hasidic hip-hopper 750-K.

In other news, David Stone & Searching for the Beast are doing the soundtrack for the latest sequel to the Halloween franchise.

Missing Time
Jule's Salad Skills
Sammy Wheeler and the Incestuous Chicago Bulls
Fake Countess
One Orange Sock
Look At It Omar
Backyard Bones
That Man Has Jonathan
Dub and Chance
Judy Hymes is Alive (the album title would be She Lives in Omaha)

This is totally my new favorite thread.


Pillars and Posts

Robert Weeks and Snuff It

The Two-Timin' Gang (country supergroup headed by Bo Tanner and accompanied by Jack Lutter and Dr. John Branion)

Juan and the Technicolor Tilma

Satanic Panic

The Evil Baby!

The Mary Morrises

The Mary Poppins Bandits

General Wayne & The Spinning Tubes

The Guardians

Stacks Of Robert

The Laughing Lights

Sweating Foil (sounds more like a song lol)

Clerkshirt (derived from Megadeth shirt store clerk)

Grandpa Bandit could open for Satanic Grandma!

Clerkshirt (derived from Megadeth shirt store clerk)[/QUOTE]


Clerkshirt, lol. I can imagine a band named Clerkshirt in this kind of scenario: "Welcome ladies and gentlemen. We are Clerkshirt and we'll be rocking your socks off from 7 to 10 here tonight at the 5th Street McDonald's. Don't forget there's a buy-one get-one free McFlurry deal."

Tyler and the Amnesiacs

Billy Messer and his Dark Poets

Spot in the Road

Radio Hoax

Alice Flies to England

Haunting Self-Portrait

The Original Night Stalkers
Ghost Blimp
It Was Suicide, No It Was Murder
Forty-Niner Hugs
Special Alert

Marfeo and the Window Watchers

Casie Nicole and the Leaks their first single could be called "I done swam (until there was no swimmin' left in me)" - in all seriousness, this was a sad case

Dark Dante and the Ortegas

Lieutenant Price and the Plane Jumpers

Mr. Fisher and the Explosives (another tragic case-- I tend to believe he will not be caught)


The Pigeon Drops (sounds like a body function, though LOL)

Gretchen and the Paisley Hats

Kemp and the Phone Calls

Michael Scott Martin and the Galacticas

Road Rage (featuring Adam Emery)

Jule Caylor and the Salad Makers (hit single "Life is Pretty Good")

Johnny Lee Wilson and the Homeboy's (featuring his grandmother rapping)

Brian Brophill and the Warm Bloods

Grundhofer and the Winded Abductors (hit single "I'm Carl and You Are Coming With Me")


Franklin Delano Floyd and the Demented

Ed Walters and the Models

Dr. Swango and the Pukes (punk band)

Howie Drummond and the $1.99 Breakfast Band (formerly Howie D's Elastic Band)

Joseph Prutzinowski reinvents himself as Hasidic hip-hopper 750-K.


:rofl:

The Spotlighters

NLO (from the ashes of ELO lol)

The Baumgarden Twins

The Freedon Fighters

Rockefeller's Tramp (see how many of the old purists get this one lol)

Tyler and the Amnesiacs

Billy Messer and his Dark Poets

Spot in the Road

Radio Hoax

Alice Flies to England

Haunting Self-Portrait



Lovin "Radio Hoax" lol. Great one!

L'Enfant

Paul Freshour and the Circleville Letters

Mailbox Guns

Liz Carmichel

Liz Carmichel

Look for Three Wheels of Deception's latest song, "Ain't Gonna Tip Me Over" at a mastectomy boutique near you!

I love this thread!

Tony and the Vagrants doing their big hit "I'm Your Son!"
Call Me Perm with "She Knows What I Want"
Bad Bedside Manner's chart topper "Swango Tango"
The D.B. Cooper Jazz Quartet's haunting "Boarding Pass to Nowhere"
and who can forget Florian Bourch and the Freedon Riders "Rough Seas Ahead"

The Hatboxes debut album "Cacti Don't Cry"

The Secret Mission's debut album "Rocky and Burwinkle"

The duet Pruitt and Camp with their hit song "Whinin' and Bitchin' "

I love this thread!

Tony and the Vagrants doing their big hit "I'm Your Son!"
Call Me Perm with "She Knows What I Want"
Bad Bedside Manner's chart topper "Swango Tango"
The D.B. Cooper Jazz Quartet's haunting "Boarding Pass to Nowhere"
and who can forget Florian Bourch and the Freedon Riders "Rough Seas Ahead"

:lol:

The second single from Call Me Perm's first album: "Balogna and Cheese Blues" with B side "Quit Buggin' Me (I'll Call the Authorities)".

"Ain't Gonna Tip Me Over"

:rofl:

"Pork N' Beans" by the Curly Green String Bean Band. Not a bad song, but it takes a while until it really heats up.

Wicked King Wicker and the Twenty-Two Disciples of Hell. If that's not metal I don't know what is.

I was just thinking this very thing last week - "Wicked King Wicker" would make an awesome name for a band. Especially if the leadman is John Wheaties...

Somebody already beat me to "Cheaper, But Will Do..."

Sessions Presents Lisa Penz: Foolish Hearts, Best Available Choices.

Selected tracks:

"No-Drugs Delight"
"E-N-O-R-M-O-U-S" (12" House Remix)
"Forget My Name (On Your New Resume)"
"Baby, Don't Check My Handbag"

Oh MAN this thread has me cracking up! How about:

You Shouldn't Smoke (Ya Know)

Satanic Panic

Dropped-Off at Wal-Mart

The Fertility Statues

Countess of Cleveland

Jai-Alai

Some Snails Were Sacrificed

UM-Tel Records proudly presents:

Country star Hank Queen with his hillbilly hit, "Honey, Can You Make Me Some Sandwiches?"

Punk rockers Tallman Family and The Haunted Bunk Bed debuts their new single, "Get the Hell Out Of My House."


Sweetheart swindler J.D. Method gives us "You Bring the Women, I'll Bring the Cons."

And finally, pop diva Tracy Wofford and her mega-hit, "Stickshift" (Just Give Me the Keys).

Bob Bean and the Videotapes of Justice

Of course, that could be a book title as well...

Co-in-Ci-Dence

how about some cheers for the cheerleaders while we're at it?

Did you sleep with her?

"Well YEA!"

Co-in-Ci-Dence

how about some cheers for the cheerleaders while we're at it?

Did you sleep with her?

"Well YEA!"

It's a Co-In-Ci-Dence

C-O-I-N-C-I-D-E-N-C-E

Coincidence!

Not guilty!

Yaaaaaaaaaay!

Now someone has to design the outfits. :lol:

It's a Co-In-Ci-Dence

C-O-I-N-C-I-D-E-N-C-E

Coincidence!

Not guilty!

Yaaaaaaaaaay!

Now someone has to design the outfits. :lol:
YAY! I like it :)

hmm,any good outifts on UM?

Now someone has to design the outfits. :lol:

Tony Alamo, of course!

I'm not as good at this as some of you, but I thought of
Wing and the Flanagans
Leapin' Tammy Leppert
Burnt Angel
Isabella Kramer and the Demented Wife
The Women in Black singing, "I must touch him!"

A good song title might be, "Perhaps it's You."

well,I would say I hear the Black Dalia has a nice two-piece outfit going on,but that would be bad...really,really bad,so I just didn't say it.No,you didn't hear it from me,folks.

Just thought of some more:

Fake Danish Accent

Skunk Ape and the Mothmen

The Rolling Bones (a Lenoard Rizzo tribute band) w/ a bonus track, "I fought the wall and the wall won."

Chiprakopra

(sp?)

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Missy and the Mundays - hit single "She Wasn't No Whore."

"I fought the wall and the wall won."

This is my favorite post!!! :lol:

Phil & The Breen Gerets

Dexys Midnight Stefoneks

Dog Food Casserole and the Sand Leashes

There's a new song called "Ragweed Pot" by Dashboard Confessional

Dexys Midnight Stefoneks


Genius. Pure genius. :D

C.O.I.C.I.D.E.N.C.E. with its #1 hit Michael Jordan Too

J.B. Method and "I'll Pay Ya Right Back"

Steve Wilson's "I Love Ya Callie"

John Moony "Beer Can Bust" "Somebody's Jail Term" and "Eviction Blues"

C.O.I.C.I.D.E.N.C.E. with its #1 hit Michael Jordan Too



LOL! and don't forget


subtitle: I play for the Chicago Bears

The Chupokopra's

song track:

1-That Ridge on my Head is Looking Rather Narly

2-Don't It Make my Red Eyes Redder

3-Watch Out or I'll Get Your Goat

4-I Wish Eddie Rabbit Was a Real Rabbit

5-I Love Kennel Ration


comon' guys...this could be a fun one...any more? LOL

The Black Hope Curses

Dr. No and the Sleeping Beauties

Coffin in the Living Room (sung by Tony Alamo)

The DeCloud Family (like the DiFranco Family, and instead of "It's a Heartbeat" they could sing "We're all cult freaks")

The DeCloud Family (like the DiFranco Family, and instead of "It's a Heartbeat" they could sing "We're all cult freaks")

That's funny. Or like the Brady Bunch Variety Hour. I can see the whole family wearing polyester jump suits and smacking tamborines...

How about "You El Sickos" for a band name?

The El Sicko's ..good one :)

tracks:

1-Circleville Letters
2-Strange Signs all Around
3-Please Mr Postman
4-Somebody Stole my Gun
5-Bus Drivin' Blues
6-Anybody Seen the Superintendent?
7-Don't Come to Circleville
8-Guns n Mailboxes
9-Mary Did You Know? (not the gospel version)
10-When We Set 'Em Up
11-They Stay Set Up
12-You Ain't Never Gettin' Outta There
13-Yellow El Caminos (sung to the tune of Yellow Submarine)
14-Signed,Sealed,Delivered,I'm Yours
15-El Sicko's Will Pay

I thought of another one, but I cheated by watching 48 Hours.

Acid Is Groovy and their hit song, "Kill the Pigs."

:lol:

Dr. Mac and the Mescaline Madness

Creepy Arsonist

The Beast, Featuring David Stone

Two Fires and Clarence Roberts

The Night Stalkers

Bob Bean & The 2 Wheelers

Lynyrd Strykland and their top 40 hit, "Manic Munday"

NLO Speedwagon

NLO Speedwagon


I just peed my pants laughing.:happyface

Bob Bean & The 2 Wheelers

Hilarious!!!!!!

Gripin' 'n Bitchin' (a country duo)
:rofl:

I am having a really hard time not laughing out loud at work!

Beastfinder

Totally misread that and wondered momentarily (in my coffee-deprived state) if UM had done a sequel to the aphrodesiac episodes...:p

The Women in Black singing, "I must touch him!"


:rotflmao:

I love this thread! Keep 'em coming, guys!

John Moony "Beer Can Bust" "Somebody's Jail Term" and "Eviction Blues"

I think Elmo Florence should open for him on the tour, even with his one and only single "Imma Hitman!"

The Kentucky Visions and their folk classic "I See My Friend's Name on a Tombstone But It Was Just Writing on the Polaroid".

Jim Burnside and the Large Steaks

Cadmosaurus

Mullets and Big Glasses

Reincarnation Records presents Georgia Rudolph and her cover of Goyte's "Somebody That I Used to Know."

This thread is KILLER!!!!! OMG!!! My fave so far is Missy and The Munday's single "She Ain't No Whore" LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here's one: Bonnie Wilder and The Five Finger Discounts. First single is "You Don't Get Lost in a Crowd (when you are Enormous)", the B-side is a cover of "Baby Got Back".

Blue Oyster Caradoc's Cult

Enormous' version of "The Bigger the Cushion" kicked some serious ass.

The Lake Wales Wackos

Parking Lot Polaroid and their hit single, "Flowers in the Attic"

.38 Pre-Stack Special

Kountry Kemp and the Footprints, with their mournful folk ballad "Lookin' for Lincoln in Wyoming"

The Lake Wales Wackos

Parking Lot Polaroid and their hit single, "Flowers in the Attic"

.38 Pre-Stack Special

Kountry Kemp and the Footprints, with their mournful folk ballad "Lookin' for Lincoln in Wyoming"

:rotflmao:

The Frank Hansen Project were all the rage back in the 70's with their take on Foreigner's "Cold as Ice". Pitifully, they tried to make a comeback a few decades later with a cover of "Hot in Herre" which fell flat on its face. A sudden change in band personnel was purportedly to blame.

Elmo Florence & John Mooney duet - "Somebody Else's Pizza"

Camouflage Jacket, with their hit song "Look at it, Omar."

The Zodiac Unibombers

Bisexual Ghost

The Rob is Guilty String Quartet

Marie Hilley's Medicinal Brew and Compound

I can't believe I just now noticed this thread! Here's a couple that haven't been mentioned offhand:

Guns That Get Up And Walk Off On Their Own
Filthy Looking Bearded Man, with "I Didn't Need To Use the Phone Anyway!"
The Tenny-Shooues (Bud Sprouse, the farmer from the 1988 Texas teen thrill killer segment)
The Red Herrings (I learned what that phrase was from the Roger Dean segment)
Angry Woman in a Mink Coat (Liza Montgomery)

I can't believe I just now noticed this thread! Here's a couple that haven't been mentioned offhand:

Guns That Get Up And Walk Off On Their Own
Filthy Looking Bearded Man, with "I Didn't Need To Use the Phone Anyway!"
The Tenny-Shooues (Bud Sprouse, the farmer from the 1988 Texas teen thrill killer segment)
The Red Herrings (I learned what that phrase was from the Roger Dean segment)
Angry Woman in a Mink Coat (Liza Montgomery)

:lol: Tenny-Shooues!

A good song title might be, "Perhaps it's You."

Old post, but I thought this was a great idea! I thought of Stack singing this to a 70s ballad by Stephen Bishop called "It Might Be You" (well it's '82 but still sounds like 70s singer-songwriter material, actually it's a really pretty song). I came up with this in about ten minutes and squeezed a couple of the rhymes in, so you can forgive me if it's not that good. :lol:

Time. You've been passing time watching cases go by.
All through tonight.
Sittin' by the TV watchin' senseless crimes.
Wishing there would be
That one viewer's tip, you see?

CHORUS:
Something's telling me perhaps it's you.
It's telling me perhaps it's you.
All through tonight.

Thinkin' back as composites go flashing past.
All through tonight.
Wonderin' what went wrong, and where they're last.
If they're at the workplace.
Would you recognize their face?

CHORUS

So many intriguing segments made
Before the stories fade
And we've so many tips to take.

Our telecenter is open all night.
Maybe all you need is time.

CHORUS

We've been saving updates and alibis.
And we've so much more, we've never even aired before!

CHORUS/END