View Full Version : THE OFFICE - Best Jokes List


victorambrosio
11-16-2011, 10:56 PM
I'd like to encourage all to list your all-time favorite jokes from "The Office." From that list I'd like to come up with a "Best 20". I will start with a few that my own office companions and I have come up with. Please add more.

1. Season 3, The Merger. Upon meeting Karen, Michael says "My you are exotic looking. was your dad a G.I.?" (our concensus favorite)

2. Season 3, The Convict. When Michael asks for the name of a white man so he could reply with a black man he trusts even more, Karen raises the bar quite high when she says "hey I got one - Jesus." Michael responds: "Apollo Creed."

3. Season 6, The Lover. Donna says "Hey, If I told you we should go to Vero Beach, you would. . . " Michael retorts: "poop my pants?"

4. Season 4, The Deposition. "To be delicate," Michael starts, "They hang off M'Lady's chest."

5. Season 4, Goodbye Toby. Michael sums up Holly: "She's like a lady baker. . . I'm pretty sure she's baked on a professional level. . ."

6. Season 3, Beach Games. "It's simple" Andy screams at Angela while floating down "lake scranton" on his back. "Look at what I'm doing and go tell somebody it."

7. Season 4, The Deposition. Synopsis: Michael's long-winded approach to remembering simple words.

8. Season 4, The Dinner Party. Hunter's song. Enough said (our vote for 2nd best all-time).

9. Season 6, Christmas special. Jim, to Michael as Santa Clause after struggling to get Ryan to sit in his lap: "Ok, you cant pin down an employee on your lap while yelling 'c'mon please, i need this, i need this'!"

10. Season 2, Drug Testing (our vote for 3rd best all-time): Michael to Dwight: "I need clear urine for the lady."

11. Season 2, Casino Night. Michael's talking head: "two ladies on casino night. I'm going to drop a deuce on everybody!"

12. Season 2, Casino Night. Darryl to Michael: "Mike, I'm not having fire eaters in a paper warehouse."

13. Season 7, Garage Sale. After pouring gasoline all over the parking lot in an effort to spell "Marry Me" in fire, Michael says "Pam, I have gasoline all over my hands and clothes. Would you light this match for me?"

to be continued. . .

-STEFFY-
11-28-2011, 12:08 AM
season 8 - Dwight tells Michael that he's a "lame duck" because of his upcoming departure, and Michael then calls Dwight a "******** owl." :lol: