View Full Version : TIME: "The Top 10 Terrible 'Dancing with the Stars' Contestants"


JamesG
11-23-2010, 05:41 AM
Top 10 Terrible "Dancing With The Stars" Contestants
Tuesday - Nov. 23, 2010



1. Kate Gosselin


From the very onset of season 10, it was apparent that reality television mom Kate Gosselin had been cast more for her dramatic and ratings-grabbing personality than for her dancing chops.

Gosselin, who famously berated her ex-husband for breathing too loudly on their show "Jon & Kate Plus 8", brought her critical tone with her to the "DWTS" set, where she immediately clashed with partner Tony Dovolani over his instructional style (he wanted to quit by the second episode).





For all the theatrics off stage, though, Gosselin was unable to bring any life to the dance floor, where judges dubbed her stiff and awkward debut performance to Billy Joel's "She's Always a Woman" a "nightmare."

The duo danced the Paso Doble to Lady Gaga's "Paparazzi" in week three, but not even the pop maven's catchy megahit could pump any energy into the reality star's performance.




Judges slammed her for "going through the motions like a Stepford wife." Gosselin's dismal moves kept her at the bottom of the barrel throughout her time on the series, and by the fifth week, the TV mom was eliminated.

Only then did Gosselin's emotions come through, as she delivered a teary goodbye to the judges and crowd.



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2. Master P


Master P joined the second season of "Dancing With the Stars" and boy, was he bad. Because he was kicked off after just four episodes, the hip-hop star and former hoops player only had a few chances to display his atrocious footwork on national television.



During the first week, he tries the cha-cha, stomping around the stage and trying to follow his dancing partner with the accuracy of a grandma testing out a new "Sweatin' to the Oldies" workout video.

To be somewhat fair, though, Master P was a last-minute replacement for his son Lil' Romeo (at the time old enough to drop the Lil'), who had recently injured himself playing basketball.



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3. Michael Bolton


Poor Michael Bolton.

In the second week of this season's "Dancing with the Stars", he performed a jive dance (at least, that's what it looked like) to "Hound Dog" that was so awful, one judge said it was the worst jive in the show's 11 seasons, before sending him "back to the dog house."

Bolton took offense and demanded an apology.


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4. Monica Seles


Monica Seles is one of the most celebrated female tennis players in history.
A dancer? Not so much.


The nine-time Grand Slam-winning player was kicked off Season 6 of "Dancing With The Stars" in a first-round double elimination after she and partner Jonathan Roberts danced the Mambo.

It seems the athlete had no trouble mastering the technical part of the show, but it was the showmanship side of dancing — especially important when the audience decides who stays and who goes — that was her downfall.



"I just could not sell the performance," she said during an interview on "Jimmy Kimmel Live". "I never missed a step, but yet I couldn't actually sell the story line."



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5. Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino


For a man known for his fist-pumping dance moves on MTV's "Jersey Shore", it came as a surprise that Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino had next to no moves on the ballroom dance floor.

In the third week, The Situation and his partner Karina Smirnoff danced the Fox Trot to the Black Eyed Peas "Boom Boom Pow." As if that wasn't bad enough (in what universe does that song and that dance go together?), the intro took place in a time machine and The Sitch emerged wearing a see-through black button-up shirt.




It wasn't the dance that got them eliminated, but it probably should have.

The following week, no amount of muscle flexing could save Sorrentino from elimination after he and Smirnoff danced the tango (one judge called it "a terrible mess").



Perhaps the problem lies in the fact that the overly image-conscious Situation never seems to let loose. He spends much more time trying to look cool than he does on nailing the dance steps — and fails on both counts.



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6. Tucker Carlson


When a good portion of your dance routine involves sitting in a chair while your partner does all the moves, you probably haven't gotten off on the right foot.

Or really, any foot.




Tucker Carlson's "routine," if you could call it that, was about as lifeless as Carlson's CNN "Crossfire" show was explosive. It basically involved one cardboard-stiff move after another, and even though he seemed to be enjoying himself, the judges pretty much hated him.

Carlson even got a 3 out of 10 from one of them, who said his performance looked like he was sitting on a toilet. Carlson should've at least kept the bow tie on. It would've given the audience something interesting to look at.



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7. Tom DeLay


He was neither the first awkward "celebrity" to appear on "Dancing with the Stars" nor the last, but Tom DeLay delivered performances with an especially disturbing quality about them.

The former House majority leader, whose trial this month came five years after he was indicted on charges of money-laundering (he denies any wrongdoing), went on the show in 2009.




The Hammer performed several routines, including a cha-cha set to "Wild Thing."

It's hard to say what's most disconcerting — the butt-shaking? the winking at the judge? the hip-swiveling? — but we're gonna go with the moment he looks directly into the camera while lip-synching, "Wild thing, I think I love you," and pointing at us unfortunate viewers.

Perhaps he would have gone far: the former Congressman wasn't voted off the show, but rather withdrew because of an injury.



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8. Evander Holyfield


As judge Bruno Tonioli put it after the boxer's quick step performance in the show's inaugural season, "It was a bit like watching Terminator keeping up with Tinkerbell."


What Holyfield lacked in grace, however, he made up in enthusiasm. He was one of the most improved dancers on the show that season even though he was the second to be eliminated.

Just watch his cha cha cha, and you'll see that his heart was definitely in it. The bulky athlete would get rave reviews at any holiday party, that's for sure.


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9. Chuck Liddell


Maybe it's his trademark mohawk.
Maybe it's the tattoo on his head.
Maybe it's the fact that he used to beat other men to a bloody pulp for a living.



Whatever it is, watching UFC light heavyweight champion Chuck Liddell boogie on the dance floor and fling about his partner Anna Trebunskaya was a bit odd.

You just can't help but think he's going to fly into a rage for missing a step and upper cut little Anna.


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10. Jerry Springer


"The Jerry Springer Show" was voted the worst TV show ever by TV Guide. And though the former talk show host and Cincinnati mayor was not the worst dancer to appear on "DWTS", he may have been part of some of the show's hokiest routines ever.



The most absurd involved Jerry pretending to play guitar (which he smashes) while wearing a matador outfit. Then he waves a cape as his dance partner prances around like a bull.

But what Jerry lacked in skills he made up for in genuine enthusiasm, and when he was inevitably eliminated, he was legitimately emotional about leaving the show.

It was almost enough to make you want Jerry to stick around for a few more dances. (Not really.)



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http://www.time.com/time/specials/packages/article/0,28804,2032622_2032645_2032634,00.html

ThomasE
11-28-2010, 01:11 AM
I was hoping Master P would make that list. When I saw him dance, it was terrible. He needed to be there bless his heart. But if he was last minute repleacement, would that have any impact on the dancing skills?