http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/37727525/ns/today-books/#hybrid_video

‘Little House’ brat reveals childhood abuse
Actress who played Nellie Oleson reveals trauma in book

By Mike Celizic
TODAYshow.com contributor
updated 11:23 a.m. ET, Wed., June 16, 2010

Getting to play one of the nastiest little girls to ever make people want to hurl things at their televisions wasn’t just fun, it was therapy for Alison Arngrim, who channeled the anger and hurt she felt at being physically and sexually abused into playing Nellie Oleson, the villainous rival to Laura Ingalls in the classic series “Little House on the Prairie.”

“When you live with abuse, you have a lot of rage and anger, and I had a place to actually take it and vent it as Nellie,” Arngrim told TODAY’s Ann Curry Wednesday in New York. “It’s done me so much good, I can’t even describe it.”

Arngrim, now 48, kept the abuse at the hands of a family member secret and is only now telling it to a wider audience through her new book, “Confessions of a Prairie Bitch: How I Survived Nellie Oleson and Learned to Love Being Hated.”

Show was ‘childhood I didn’t have’
She said the abuse started when she was 6 and ended before she took on the role of Nellie, but the effects of the abuse stayed with her a long time.

The experience has inspired her to get involved with the National Association to Protect Children, which lobbies for laws to protect children.

“This is something that’s happening to millions of people — sexually abused and physically abused,” Arngrim told Curry. “I get mail all the time from people who say, ‘I did not have a perfect childhood like “Little House on the Prairie,” and that’s why I watched the show because I loved it; it was the childhood that I didn’t have.’ ”

The irony is not lost on Arngrim. “I thought maybe I should tell them, ‘Well, it’s the same for me. I also got things from the show that I wasn’t getting in my life,’” she said.

Role taught her life lessons
An actress and stand-up comic now, Arngrim was 11 when she took on the role of bitchy blonde Nellie in 1974. She continued in the role as her character grew up and got married in 1981.

Nellie, she writes in her book, “was a girl I grew to love. She got me out of my house when I thought there was no escape. She aided and protected me like no other creature, real or imagined. She transformed me from a shy, abused little girl afraid of her own shadow to the in-your-face, outspoken, world-traveling, politically active, big-mouthed bitch I am today. She taught me to fight back, to be bold, daring, and determined, and, yes, to be downright sneaky when I needed to be.”

She said that people are surprised to learn that offscreen, Arngrim and Melissa Gilbert, who played Laura, were best friends. “We’re Twittering and Facebooking and texting each other,” she said. On screen, they were at each other’s throats.

“This seems to blow people away, that the two girls who were mortal enemies, were constantly punching each other, were rolling in the mud, we were best friends. We were at each other’s house every weekend having slumber parties,” Arngrim told Curry.

Playing a villain ‘fantastic’
People who loved the show still blame Arngrim for Nellie’s actions. “I am repeatedly held to account for the actions of a fictitious character as if they were my own. And not just any character. A bitch. A horrible, wretched, scheming, evil, lying, manipulative, selfish brat, whose narcissism and hostility toward others knew no bounds. A girl who millions of people all over the world had grown to hate,” she writes.

“Playing a villain is fantastic. I’ve always loved the villain roles,” she added to Curry. “To be 11 or 12 and have everyone call you a bitch to your face every day of your life is very strange, and to realize that it’s a compliment. That’s why I say, learn to love being hated.”

Arngrim said she knew immediately that she had to embrace her character to survive.

“When I went to school the next day, one girl actually screamed at me. I’ve been spat upon, beaten and pelted with garbage at a Christmas parade. I was beaten up at a personal appearance.” She said she told herself, “I’m going to have to really embrace this and go with this, or I’m not going to survive the show.”

Landon not ‘perfect’ dad
Arngrim still thinks the world of Michael Landon, who directed and played Charles Ingalls, but, she says, he was not the perfect man he played on screen.

“He was very Hollywood. He liked the fast cars, the Ferrari; he was married several times. He was a really Hollywood producer-director type. He smoked, he drank, he told dirty jokes.”

But Landon was also very protective of the children in the cast and insisted that they behave on set and treat adults with respect. Arngrim and other cast members credit Landon for helping make sure that none of the child actors suffered adult meltdowns, as is so common in Hollywood.

Arngrim also spoke with affection of cast member Steve Tracy, who was her husband on the show. Tracy was gay and became Arngrim’s close friend.

He contracted AIDS and before dying of the disease in 1986, came out publically about the disease and his sexuality.

“He was only 32,” Arngrim said. “He went public with his diagnosis at a time when absolutely no one did that.”

I may love to hate Nellie Olsen but I love Alison Arngrim. It's great that being Nellie helped her deal with her own demons and it's also great that she is now helping other people going through the samething with her orginization to protect children.

I have gotten to meet Alison and she's a scream. Plus she has such a huge heart. God bless her and I hope it only gets better from here!! :D

I hope Alison Arngrim comes to Chicago to promote her book.

http://edition.cnn.com/2010/SHOWBIZ/books/06/18/alison.arngrim.book/

(CNN) -- Actress Alison Arngrim is most famous for playing the wicked Nellie Oleson on "Little House on the Prairie." Nellie -- one of the ultimate TV villains of all-time -- did things like imitate a stuttering child and persuade a classmate to steal the answers to a test among many other atrocities.

Arngrim, 48, has been asked so many questions about the beloved television series that she turned her account into a stand-up comedy act featuring a popular Q&A session that became her new memoir, "Confessions of a Prairie Bitch: How I Survived Nellie Oleson and Learned to Love Being Hated."

"Little House has had such an impact on people's psyches over the years," Arngrim told CNN. "And I wanted fans to know that it meant as much to me as it did to everybody else."

Arngrim said she began writing down anecdotes after Michael Landon died in 1991. When actress Melissa Gilbert -- who remains Arngrim's best friend to this day -- penned her own autobiography last year, the two women compared notes so stories wouldn't be redundant.

When asked about Landon, Arngrim calls the late actor a "driven, intense, volatile perfectionist. But then five minutes later he'd be playing some weird practical joke and then laughing maniacally. He was absolutely bonkers. He had the most crazy, twisted, warped sense of humor ever."

Arngrim says Landon instilled a belief among the entire cast and crew that hard work (and a paycheck!) was its own reward. There were no prima donnas allowed on that set.

"Look at what happened to Gary Coleman," said Arngrim. "When he was on 'Diff'rent Strokes' he was really catered to. He could show up on set in his pajamas. That wouldn't have flown on 'Little House'. The kids on 'Diff'rent Strokes' were absolutely fussed over. Every whim was entertained and they were paid enormous amounts of money. They were treated like stars. How'd that work out?"

Angrim added, "On 'Little House' we were expected to just work. Most of us were paid less, but we still have some of the money. No arrests, no convictions."

On the life of a child star, Arngrim said that "the further they make your life from reality, the harder its going to be to come back and the more trouble you're going to have transitioning to the real world."

As a small child, Arngrim and her eccentric family lived in Los Angeles' famed Chateau Marmont hotel. Arngrim's Canadian father was gay and worked as Liberace's manager. Her mother (also Canadian) was a voiceover artist who provided the voices for Gumby, Casper the Friendly Ghost, various friends of Gumby and Casper, Sweet Polly Purebred (Underdog's girlfriend), Davey of Davey and Goliath; and did a host of commercial voice work.

Her parents didn't find out until decades later that Arngrim had suffered brutal abuse at the hands of her brother. As a result, Arngrim has worked tirelessly to ensure other kids don't endure the same. She currently works with various child advocacy causes, including the National Association to Protect Children. Arngrim helped overturn an outdated law that allowed child molesters to avoid jail time if they were related to their victims.

Another personal tragedy inspired Arngrim to do activist work on behalf of people suffering from AIDS and HIV. Arngrim's "Little House on the Prairie" co-star Steve Tracy died of AIDS in 1986. Arngrim was particularly struck by the cruelty Tracy encountered even after his death. "His mother almost couldn't get his body cremated," Arngrim told CNN.

"I've learned to love being hated and I've become grateful for Nellie Oleson and being hated. Being Nellie has enabled me to help abused children and people with AIDS and HIV."

Arngrim keeps in touch with her "Little House" co-stars, and they reunite at least once a year. She often gets asked about the actors who portrayed Nellie's parents. They are "alive and well," Arngrim said. She also noted that the group honestly didn't realize they were "on to something" until about the third season.

"And that it wasn't until DVD sales in recent years that we realized it was a multicultural sociological phenomenon and that we were a part of Americana. We were clueless."

Arngrim's ultimate inspiration is the number of people that continue to come up to her and tell her, "'Little House on the Prairie' saved my life."

Arngrim said, "Whether it was the show's values or the way a character did something, people told me the show gave them the strength to go on. And I thought to myself, 'They don't say this about 'The Brady Bunch,' do they'?"

"I'm using my Nellie-ness for good, not evil, and it has been wonderful. I'm probably the most grateful bitch you ever saw."

I have a friend who is a HUGE Irwin Allen fan, and loves all his shows - especially Land of the Giants (which besides Stefan Arngrim, featured Kevin "Doc Baker" Hagen). I for one will never look at Stefan the same way again and I wonder what my friend will think when I tell him. :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: