I know that this is one of those threads that I am going to regret in the morning, but here goes. 2009 has been one of the lowest points of my life. Early in the year I broke up with a girl who I loved with all my heart because I could not see a future for the relationship. Getting over her was a long and difficult journey that lasted until late in the summer. During that time, when I would have dreams about her, I would wake up depressed and in tears. Also chossing not to be with her, cost me a friendship...the girl who introduced us.

In spring I lost my job. I had a great deal of money saved up, but it is slowly running out. If I don't have a job by the beginning of next year, I will have to sell my car because I will no longer be able to afford to pay for it. Since I was laid off, I have filled out 80 job applications. I have been turned down for over 50 jobs, and never heard back about the other 30. I had a job interview today, and I don't think I got it. I have a Bachlor's Degree and am being tunred down for jobs that require only a high school education.

I have been seeing a therapist, but it has not been helping. There are mornings that I am so depressed I can't even drag myself out of bed until noon. I've also been having suicidal thougts since last summer because with no work I just don't see a future for me. Now, I would never act on these thoughts, but because I have been having them when I never have had them before, I am scared.

I've lived through many troubled times. During the summer of 1994, the girl who I had been dating for two years died of cancer. She was only 17. It took a long, long time, but I did get over her death. Though I still miss her. In both 1999 and 2005 I went through serious bouts of depression but recovered. In 2007 my dog died, and it was like losing a brother. I'm still not over his death. Even though I adopted another dog who I love very much. This time though, I feel like I not going to make it. That things are never going to get better for me. I just don't know what to do.

From one Christian to another, don't be so hard on yourself. God will get you through this just like He did everything else. Just pray about it and leave it in His hands. Although it may not seem like it now, every cloud has a silver lining and things work out for the best.
Not exactly the best or newest advice in the world, but the only one I could come up with. lol. ;)
Anyway, I'll be praying for you. Give us an update. :)

Hang in there. In my sixty-plus years, I have seen both good and bad times
(like everyone else). It is hard to get through the tough times, but never
stop believing in yourself, and you'll make it. It is easy to become discouraged, especially when one has lost as much as you have. I hope
things take a turn for the better really soon. Keep us posted. You always
have friends here.

I'm so sorry to hear all of this, especially because you're a good person and don't deserve it. No regrets; there's nothing wrong with venting to people who care. I agree with tv star collector...there are good times and bad times, and right now is an extremely difficult time for you. You may feel like things could never get better, but it's only because you're so discouraged because of what has happened to you. Things CAN get better and I'm sure they will. Best of luck to you :hug:

I agree with everybody else here, Mike, that you are going through a pretty rough patch right now, but things are bound to get better sooner or later. I also agree that it's PERFECTLY okay to vent to all your friends here. I don't know where I would be if I weren't able to vent my feelings and frustrations with my own life to my own friends. I am really very sorry to hear that things are going so badly for you right now, though. :( You're in my prayers.

:bighug:

Shine are you able to get unemployment benifits.


I also can relate to the job issue. I have been out of work since January, and have been looking and nothing.


I dont remember the last time I went out on a date


My friends think I am a creep because I am a quite person


I recently had to shell out nearly $2,000 on auto repairs.


2009 has not been one of my better years either, but you have to hang in there, and keep the faith.

Mike, I'm so sorry you're going through such a hard time. You've had A LOT of stressful (sad) things thrown at you all at once and that would overwhelm anyone. What has worked for me is having a good support network - some loyal and wise friends I can share with. I hope you get through all of this and I'm praying for you.

Regarding job hunting, one thing that has worked for me is to have a few different resumes. When I left one job I could do database management (updating databases & running rpts from them) as well as secretarial skills. So I had a resume for each. And when there was a company I really wanted to work for (get my foot into the door) I made a third where I "dumbed down" my experience so I wouldn't look over-qualified. Just like we have more than one pair of shoes we should have more than one resume.

I'm sorry you're feeling like this. :( Maybe you should try to look for different therapist since yours doesn't seem to be helping you. You didn't mention if you were taking any medication for depression, if you aren't it might be something to look in to. I really hope you start to feel better. :)

I won't be sorry to see 2009 go myself - the only real good thing to happen was the birth of Ryan. I know how you feel, Mike. :(

I agree, 2009 has been, one hell of a year. First, a cancer scare, then breaking down with this horrible skin condition, that made looked like I had this horrific disease; then, my dog died. But that is life. You have to roll with the bad times, and you have to roll with the good. Losing jobs, being unemployed, losing the love of your life, etc. It happens to everyone. We are not living in the best of times. It is hard to find a job, period. But, remember, there is hope. Who knoes, 2010, you be the BEST time of your life!!!:D

I am so sorry Mike. I am praying for you and I know many others are as well. Hang in there. :bighug: