This is Celebrity Jeopardy!

Alex: Welcome to this week's episode of Celebrity Jeopardy! We've had an exciting week so far. Big winners for charity this week include Mindy Cohn with minus $500,000 dollars, Gary Coleman with negative $459,000 dollars and Betty White with 7 dollars. I'm not sure anyone can earn 7 dollars, but let's continue with our game. Today we have in the studio game show host Anne Robinson. Welcome Anne Robinson.

Anne Robinson: Thanks Alex, and let me just say that I'm ready to Clobber.

Alex: You're not playing against me, you Killer. Next, we have the athletic champion Andrew Carden.

Andrew Carden: Where's my Yo-Yo?!? Where's my Yo-Yo?!? I'm ready Coach! Put me in!

Alex: Good God, where do we find these people? And finally, we have Oscar winning actress Dana Plato. Welcome Dana Plato.

Dana Plato: Oh it's so nice to be here. OK so I'll start. Bachelor number one, Do you like onion rings?

Alex: No, no this isn't "The Dating Game," you Chipmunk. Look enough OK, let's just get started. Our categories for the first round are: "Comedy Films," "R-Words," "Cute Animals," "Stuff You Ate for Dinner Today" and finally "Game Show Hosts on 'Family Feud'." Anne Robinson, why do you pick the first category?

Anne Robinson: Aha! You've made the unfortunate mistake of letting me choose the first question! You Killer excuse for a Chipmunk!

Alex: Once again, you are not competing against me.

Anne Robinson: Oh, you can only dream Trebek.

Alex: Will you please just pick a category, Anne Robinson!

Anne Robinson: Alright, alright, I'll try "Rwords" for $4,568.

Alex: No that's "R-Words," not "Rwords." Rwords isn't even a real word.

Anne Robinson: That's just part of my strategy, you Purple, Cute Gary Coleman.

Alex: Ok, not you're not even making any sense. You're just using words that were typed in on the last web page at random. All right enough, I'll pick the category. Let's try "Game Show Hosts on 'Family Feud'" for $200. And the answer is, "This person is the host of Family Feud."

Andrew Carden: (buzzes in first) Paul McCartney!

Alex: No, he wasn't even a game show host. Let's try another dollar amount in that category, how about $400. And the answer is, "Come on, this is an easy one, he's the host of Family Feud."

Dana Plato: (buzzes in first) All right, Bachelor #2, if you were a Ice Cream, what flavor would you be?

Alex: I said, this isn't "The Dating Game!" You know what I'll give the money to charity. Any charity you want. Andrew Carden, which charity are you playing for?

Andrew Carden: I'm playing for ABBA and the folks at The Facts Of Life.

Alex: No! Those aren't charities! My God, that's it! Game's over. I'm going home. Nobody wins. Just go! No Damn Final Jeopardy! Go!

Anne Robinson: I guess that means I win! AHAHAHAHA! I'm the champion! I'm the ruler! I'm the king! That means I get to keep the money I win! Damn my charity! It's mine, I tell you, mine!

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Andrew Carden

Ummm.... isn't Dana Plato dead? That would be one creepy episode!

Yeah, callmetootie, you know Dana Plato is dead.

You should already know that she died a long time ago..

callmetootie, you goofed...

I actuall found this in my documents, I must have written it about 2 years ago.

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Andrew Carden

I actuall found this in my documents, I must have written it about 2 years ago. Except, that won't make sense because of Anne...

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Andrew Carden

Well, aside from the Dana Plato mistake, I thought it was hilarious! Those skits are my favorite on SNL. While I was reading your version I was picturing Will Ferrell playing Alex Trebek.

Originally posted by allen:
Well, aside from the Dana Plato mistake, I thought it was hilarious! Those skits are my favorite on SNL. While I was reading your version I was picturing Will Ferrell playing Alex Trebek.

You too?

Great piece, except for the whole Dana Plato thing.

That wasn't a mistake. callmetootie prob. wrote this right before she had an overdose on sleeping pills.