"Dinner Guest":

(Freddie Muller, Ralph's boss, is visiting along with his wife.)

Ralph (to Alice): "Why did you have to tell that joke? I must have a million better jokes. I don't even know where I got that joke."

Freddie Muller: "I told you that joke the other day."

"Norton Moves In":

Ed (coming in with a folding cot): "Hello folks! I hope we didn't disturb your sleep."

Ralph: "No, you didn't disturb my sleep. I always get up at 3am. That way, I can get a seat on the subway on the way to work."

"A Weighty Problem Part 1":

Ralph: "Norton, how could I lose a couple of inches in height in a few hours?"

Ed: "Maybe all that food you ate made you shorter in height."

"People's Choice" (Color version):

Ralph: "What am I supposed to say?"

Policeman: "'Knuckles, it's you.'"

(The policeman hides out in the bedroom.)

(Knuckles enters through the front door. Ralph greets him.)

Ralph: "Na na na na. Na na na na."

(Ed comes in.)

Ed: "Knuckles, it's you."

"Mama Loves Mambo":

Alice: "You seem to have forgotten that I am a woman."

Ralph: "I forgot that you are a woman? How could I? You are always yappin'."

"Unconventional Behavior":

Ed: "Ralph?"

Ralph: "What?"

Ed: "Mind if I smoke?"

Ralph: "I don't care if you burn."

"Ralph Kramden Inc.":

Ralph: "Are you sure that that suitcase can hold $40,000,000. Why don't you cut pieces of paper into the shape of dollars bills and find out?"

(Ed opens up his case to reveal that he did just that.)

Ed: "Small details."

"Ralph Goes Hollywood":

Bing: "Looks like you run a very democratic household Ralph."

Trixie: "Yeah, you know what happened to them in the last election."

"Sleepy Time Gal":

Ralph: "This furniture is good for me."

Alice: "Sure. But just because you are a Raccoon doesn't mean that I have to live in a hole in the ground."