View Full Version : Being ignored by friends


Brad Russ
05-07-2009, 04:40 AM
I'm not speaking of anyone here, because pretty much all of my real close friends here, don't ignore me, it's more my offline friends that sometimes do it. It doesn't make me mad usually, it usually just makes me paranoid, thinking maybe I did something wrong, and that maybe they're upset with me. It is a pretty crappy feeling though to have a friend just stop associating with you for no reason whatsoever. I've had that happen a couple times, and I personally think it's karma coming back to haunt me. I've been guilty many times, and am actually guilty of not giving friends enough of my time as we speak. It's not that I ignore them, it's just that I have so many online friends, that I have a problem keeping up to date with all of them at times. My ADD doesn't help matters either, but I can't use that as an excuse, because oftentimes it's just me being lazy. If I can sit here and write a long ass post like this, then I can certainly write a message to a friend. I think alot of it too has to do with casual friends, and real close friends. Some friends you just have more of a connection with, and I'm usually pretty good at staying in contact with them, but even then I sometimes get lazy. I don't know, I guess in a way this thread is a way for me to apologize to those who I don't have as much contact with as I should, and I just want you all to know that I will continue to try harder to keep in better contact with you all in the future. Anyway, does anyone else have a problem when it comes to staying in regular contact with people, and have you had people stop having regular contact with you? If so, how do you feel when you don't hear from them in awhile?? Do you get angry, or are you more like me, and get paranoid, wondering if you did something to offend them??

Wreckless
05-07-2009, 04:45 AM
Brad, I have had his happen to me before and it sucks- mostly with girls. This chick I became I'd say good friends with for a few weeks, plays games, only talks to me when I text her phone from my AIM sn. From their, she'll text me back, and texts me on my phone for a few days but stops after I stop to see if she cares whatsoever. I'm starting to think she looks down at me, like I'm a f*cking slave or something- lol. Not even a slave..I don't know- like she's rich and I'm poor, so we shouldn't communicate online or associate herself with me, it's really stupid and complicated I guess. Cause I comment on her statuses sometimes or have in the past and leave her comments, yet she won't reply at all, or will reply, but to somebody else's comment in a status- for people like me that Facebook, and heavy- on here. Yet she'll text me non-stop or won't stop texting me if I respond, if I simply IM her once. It's the weirdest thing. But yeah, it sucks and I know what you mean. Craziness.

Brad Russ
05-07-2009, 05:11 AM
Brad, I have had his happen to me before and it sucks- mostly with girls. This chick I became I'd say good friends with for a few weeks, plays games, only talks to me when I text her phone from my AIM sn. From their, she'll text me back, and texts me on my phone for a few days but stops after I stop to see if she cares whatsoever. I'm starting to think she looks down at me, like I'm a f*cking slave or something- lol. Not even a slave..I don't know- like she's rich and I'm poor, so we shouldn't communicate online or associate herself with me, it's really stupid and complicated I guess. Cause I comment on her statuses sometimes or have in the past and leave her comments, yet she won't reply at all, or will reply, but to somebody else's comment in a status- for people like me that Facebook, and heavy- on here. Yet she'll text me non-stop or won't stop texting me if I respond, if I simply IM her once. It's the weirdest thing. But yeah, it sucks and I know what you mean. Craziness.

Man, that's a pretty ****ty situation to deal with. I've never had anyone disrespect me that blatantely before. I'm sorry you're having to deal with that Kyle. To be honest with you, you're one of the people who inspired me to start this thread, because I've been feeling guilty that it's taken me so long to reply to your last pm. You always have so much awesome stuff to say, and I really need to start responding to people quicker. I probably have about 5 people atleast that I really need to contact soon. I don't know why it's so hard for me sometimes, but I just always am so distracted with stupid stuff. I'm going to pm you soon though, and I will try hard not to ever take so long to get back to you in the future. I just need to get less distracted, and get more focused on the things that are most important, and that's my friends!!!

Wreckless
05-07-2009, 05:27 AM
Man, that's a pretty ****ty situation to deal with. I've never had anyone disrespect me that blatantely before. I'm sorry you're having to deal with that Kyle. To be honest with you, you're one of the people who inspired me to start this thread, because I've been feeling guilty that it's taken me so long to reply to your last pm. You always have so much awesome stuff to say, and I really need to start responding to people quicker. I probably have about 5 people atleast that I really need to contact soon. I don't know why it's so hard for me sometimes, but I just always am so distracted with stupid stuff. I'm going to pm you soon though, and I will try hard not to ever take so long to get back to you in the future. I just need to get less distracted, and get more focused on the things that are most important, and that's my friends!!!

Brad- don't worry about it...you are a great guy & friend, and when you respond or whenever we PM each other next time, I'll look at it as "oh awesome, brad sent me a PM, can't wait to read it and hear what he has to say, hopefully he's doin good" NOT, "oh it took him 5 months to respond to my last PM- what's this guy's problem"? cause that won't be going through my head at all, as far as the second quote goes. It will be what I said in the first quote about being excited to hear from you and what you have to say, and that you are doing alright. But thank you for the kind words, appreciated. And about the girl, yeah she's immature. I don't let it bug me at all, but I thought I'd share it while we're on topic. And about writing this topic about me, thank you but don't look at it as- oh i'm ignoring kyle...cause you aren't...you are not ignoring me, and if it takes a while for you to respond, you have a life, so don't worry about it. Plus, I do the SAME THING lol. A lot of times when I respond to PMs on this site or on other sites, I get lazy and instead of just responding back right then and their, I get lazy and put it off like always :lol:, but that's not you- it's just me. The chick is somewhat good looking, and she's cool to talk to- when we ACTUALLY talk and converse, but Kyle has no time for immature people, or immature girls..funny and having a great sense of humor, and maybe having a bad day is perfectly fine with me, but this is different...i don't need childish people that act only like their crazy friends, to me..Anyways...take as long as you want to PM me...but I would love to hear from ya ;) :cool: :crazy: !!!

MickeyMac
05-07-2009, 12:27 PM
This sorta fits into this thread. I have a couple of friends whom I see from time to time who I get along with great and have great conversations with but I have sent them friend requests on Facebook and both have ignored my request. I have one friend in particular whom I sent a facebook request to twice and has ignored. Me and this friend get along great and is someone I've known for over 15 years. This friend worked at a record store and told me about a lot of great music. Like I said we get along great but she has twice igorned my facebook request. I dont get it. :(

Nighthawk76
05-07-2009, 12:49 PM
I've had quite a few friends in my life who just seem to give up on me. Sometimes its my fault, often its not. This has happened with both offline and online friends. And that is why I am often very hesitant to make new friends. I'm afraid that after a while they will just drop me like a bad habit. As I mentioned above, there are a few cases that I deserved what I got. Jenny (Family Ties Foerever) and I, I hope that she doesn't mind me mentioning her, have had a pretty rough time in our relationship for about a year now. And in her case, I would say that the problems are 80% my fault. In the past I have often taken Jenny's friendship for granted. Of course, she got tired of being treated that way. So it reached a point where she really didn't care to talk to me anymore. Who can blame her? Though I like to think that over the last couple of weeks, things have begun to improve a little between her and I.

There have been many cases where people have dropped me as a friend for no reason. I was a member of another board up until last year. I think you all know which site I'm talking about. None of my friends from that site ever talk to me anymore. I never hear from any of them. Now, what did I do to deserve that? The fact that they all dropped me as a friend really hurt me. Especially two members of that board who I thought really cared about me.

PZelda
05-07-2009, 03:00 PM
Story of my life in real life. This guy I used to work with just stopped talking to me for no reason at all. If I *really* wanted to, and I could, I would post every single text he has sent me in the last 2 months to get my revenge on him for him dropping me cold. He claims to be a ~*devout Catholic. Right... Not when we would correspond via texts. :p

It's never my fault anyway.

Waterston_Fan
05-07-2009, 03:02 PM
This sorta fits into this thread. I have a couple of friends whom I see from time to time who I get along with great and have great conversations with but I have sent them friend requests on Facebook and both have ignored my request. I have one friend in particular whom I sent a facebook request to twice and has ignored. Me and this friend get along great and is someone I've known for over 15 years. This friend worked at a record store and told me about a lot of great music. Like I said we get along great but she has twice igorned my facebook request. I dont get it. :(

This isn't anything against you when I say this.

But maybe she's got somethings on her facebook account she don't want you to see.

And maybe she wants to protect you from her other friends who might be meant to you or something like that.

I have two facebook accounts, one for the people my mom knows even though she doesn't really use it and another for me which is my former classmates, co workers and friends. I just didn't want my mom's relatives to be requesting friends of my former classmates or friends cause they post a lot of stuff online because there is nothing to do in Iceland.

Wreckless
05-07-2009, 03:15 PM
oh let me share another story of a bitch who decided to ignore me, for no particular reason AT ALL... i was good friends with a girl named Monica- who I knew and met- she went to the high school in the town I live in, down my Dads. We always would talk on Myspace and sometimes would IM each other, whenever she went on AIM but she became insecure & odd. So about a year ago, it was around the beginning of June, we went to her junior year prom. She had asked me 2 months earlier in 2008 if I would go with her. I was a friend then, I could of said- nah f*ck it, I don't wanna go...but it seemed fun and it was, and I never went to prom senior year of my hs to begin with, plus I wanted to be nice and not hurt her- a good friend as well, feelings neither....so we went- and had a great time, I have pictures from it still but I thoroughly enjoyed myself. So within the 3/4 weeks, to a month after we went to prom, I was texting, hitting her up on Myspace & trying to contact her. I wasn't going nuts and hitting her up a million times a day on some Swim Fan sh*t, but I was reachingout, to see what's up after we chilled at the dance, from a friend to a friend. She didn't respond ONCE..didn't reach out to me....about 2 weeks later after I gave up, she commented me with the most bullsh*t comment on myspace. She said "oh i'm sorry, i've been so busy lately - how are you?" to that degree. I ignored the comment, got it but never responded and I think she felt guilty, cause she commented me again 2 days later, saying she had a pic on her camera with us 2 and my friend Victor in the shot that she had and that I wanted after the picture was taken a month earlier. The bulsh*t part, her TRYING to play me for a f%cking fool- lol, is that she wasn't busy at all. School was out for a month, cause it was July when she hit me up w/ that comment, she wasn't working or didn't have a job yet at the time & she dances & takes dance classes throughout the year, EXCEPT for summer, so I knew she didn't have that, or not as much. She was down the beach every day, blowing me off disrespectively and I had enough of the drama. We haven't spoken since. She deleted me off her Myspace Friends and 2/3 months ago, I finally decided to delete her off my friends- my Facebook friends & that we probably wouldn't be friends again. I remind you, I did ABSOLUTELY nothing to this girl. I was always so nice to her, and could of blown off her asking me to the prom, but I'm cool like that :lol:.

See what I mean- I have to deal with this constant, drama filled BULLSH*T- lol. I've had enough of it and am not a person who surrounds myself with drama whatsoever, so it's out of the question.

littlebelle
05-07-2009, 03:47 PM
Never in my life except for recently (recently as in a couple days ago). My best friend in the whole world that I've been friends with since 7th grade has started to ignore all my texts and phone calls. It's so weird because this has never happened before except for when would get into arguments. We were suppose to hang out this week, we had made plans over the weekend. I tried getting ahold of her on tuesday and wednesday, but no response. It scares me when this happens because I'm afraid that I did something to make her mad- but I don't know what.

steevo
05-08-2009, 12:45 AM
For me personally, it certainly hurts when I get ignored by people who are supposed to be my friends. It makes me feel like I'm not welcome and its not a good feeling, trust me. At my church, I had a few instances where somebody I started a conversation all of a sudden "had to talk to someone else". Now let me just say that it isn't the norm and most people do stop and talk to me, but it does sting a bit when they don't seem to want to give you the time of day.

Wreckless
05-08-2009, 12:56 AM
Never in my life except for recently (recently as in a couple days ago). My best friend in the whole world that I've been friends with since 7th grade has started to ignore all my texts and phone calls. It's so weird because this has never happened before except for when would get into arguments. We were suppose to hang out this week, we had made plans over the weekend. I tried getting ahold of her on tuesday and wednesday, but no response. It scares me when this happens because I'm afraid that I did something to make her mad- but I don't know what.

no, you never know...she's probably busy, and will contact you back when she gets time to read or gets the messages...even if it was already set up for you two to hang out..

dawsongirl
05-08-2009, 01:01 AM
I had some friends do this to me in college. I was living with undiagnosed anxiety and so I was basically being selfish just to feel better. Friends took off. :rolleyes: Stupid bitches. It was over stupid crap too, like not wanting to share a ride to school because I felt better having my car there for an easy "escape."

TVFactFan
05-08-2009, 09:47 PM
I'm not speaking of anyone here, because pretty much all of my real close friends here, don't ignore me, it's more my offline friends that sometimes do it. It doesn't make me mad usually, it usually just makes me paranoid, thinking maybe I did something wrong, and that maybe they're upset with me. It is a pretty crappy feeling though to have a friend just stop associating with you for no reason whatsoever. I've had that happen a couple times, and I personally think it's karma coming back to haunt me. I've been guilty many times, and am actually guilty of not giving friends enough of my time as we speak. It's not that I ignore them, it's just that I have so many online friends, that I have a problem keeping up to date with all of them at times. My ADD doesn't help matters either, but I can't use that as an excuse, because oftentimes it's just me being lazy. If I can sit here and write a long ass post like this, then I can certainly write a message to a friend. I think alot of it too has to do with casual friends, and real close friends. Some friends you just have more of a connection with, and I'm usually pretty good at staying in contact with them, but even then I sometimes get lazy. I don't know, I guess in a way this thread is a way for me to apologize to those who I don't have as much contact with as I should, and I just want you all to know that I will continue to try harder to keep in better contact with you all in the future. Anyway, does anyone else have a problem when it comes to staying in regular contact with people, and have you had people stop having regular contact with you? If so, how do you feel when you don't hear from them in awhile?? Do you get angry, or are you more like me, and get paranoid, wondering if you did something to offend them??


Well that usually what it means Brad, it was something about you or something you did that stopped from talking to you. I know this because I have done this to a female friend of mine, when I got laid in January she would still complain to me on the phone about her job not giving a bonus. Did she really think I gave a sh*t about her not getting a bonus and I was just laid off? So I'm not sure if that's the case but that's usually what it means. Some people rather not be confrontational and rather fade off quietly

Theda Bara
05-08-2009, 09:53 PM
I never had this experience with any of my male friends; but females, all the freaking time; it is to the point now that I do not trust women anymore, and I am very weary of befriending them.

dawsongirl
05-08-2009, 10:00 PM
Not that this guy and I were really friends, but anyway, this dude I went to HS with found me on...classmates or something...and emailed me a couple times. In one email he mentioned being a NASCAR fan and I was, so am I. So he asks me who my favorite driver is...I tell him Jeff Gordon. He sends back some email about how he hates Gordon and never talks to me again. HOW FREAKIN LAME IS THAT? Good thing we were never friends in HS anyway. Weirdo.

Nighthawk76
05-09-2009, 03:04 AM
Not that this guy and I were really friends, but anyway, this dude I went to HS with found me on...classmates or something...and emailed me a couple times. In one email he mentioned being a NASCAR fan and I was, so am I. So he asks me who my favorite driver is...I tell him Jeff Gordon. He sends back some email about how he hates Gordon and never talks to me again. HOW FREAKIN LAME IS THAT? Good thing we were never friends in HS anyway. Weirdo.

That is weird. I can hear you starting up the mac truck already, Cathy. :lol: ;)

Janice
05-09-2009, 03:52 AM
Brad, I feel like I'm ignorng you. It's not intentional. I've got some things going on. I think of you all the time. We'll catch up soon.

Janice
05-09-2009, 03:56 AM
Not that this guy and I were really friends, but anyway, this dude I went to HS with found me on...classmates or something...and emailed me a couple times. In one email he mentioned being a NASCAR fan and I was, so am I. So he asks me who my favorite driver is...I tell him Jeff Gordon. He sends back some email about how he hates Gordon and never talks to me again. HOW FREAKIN LAME IS THAT? Good thing we were never friends in HS anyway. Weirdo.
What a weirdo. With that said, I've found that with some people, sports can be as divisive as politics. Still, that was one strange bird. Good riddance. :rolleyes:

Brad Russ
05-09-2009, 04:11 AM
Brad, I feel like I'm ignorng you. It's not intentional. I've got some things going on. I think of you all the time. We'll catch up soon.

I know you're not ignoring me Janice, so please don't ever feel bad. I know you have alot going on from all the work you do here at S.O., to all you're going through in your personal life. Just so you know though, I never thought you were ignoring me. You're my best friend whether we talk once a day, or once a week, it doesn't matter. Nothing will ever change the way I feel about you!!! :heart: :hug:

beautifuldreamer
05-09-2009, 05:18 AM
Brad, I feel like I'm ignorng you. It's not intentional. I've got some things going on. I think of you all the time. We'll catch up soon.

Janice brings up a really good point, Brad. Even though you didn't feel she was ignoring you, I think a lot of times people sometimes lose track of friends because of simply being busy. I've been guilty of this quite a lot... it so hard for me to keep up with everyone and everything... I can't write to all my online friends everyday, or talk to everyone I know at school or church everyday either... and I always feel guilty. Or, oftentimes, I'll physically be at, say school for example, and just not feel like talking to my friends because I have other things on my mind, and it comes off as being rude.

People have done this to me as well... we'll talk a lot... and then later on.. nothing. I always figure my friends just have a lot on their minds or are going through some busyness or other stuff in their lives and they need space. Maybe I feel so impartial about it because I really don't have too many super-close friends, but endless aquaintances... so I just try to say hello whenever possible. If a buddy is ignoring me, I do always try to make the first move and say hi etc. and usually the first thing out of their mouths is, "I've just been so busy." or, "I'm really tired." It's just normal... that's all. I try not to get too offended about it.:D

MickeyMac
05-09-2009, 12:43 PM
This isn't anything against you when I say this.

But maybe she's got somethings on her facebook account she don't want you to see.

And maybe she wants to protect you from her other friends who might be meant to you or something like that.

I have two facebook accounts, one for the people my mom knows even though she doesn't really use it and another for me which is my former classmates, co workers and friends. I just didn't want my mom's relatives to be requesting friends of my former classmates or friends cause they post a lot of stuff online because there is nothing to do in Iceland.


Could be, but it still bothers me that she wont add me on her friends list, but such is life.

MrCleveland
05-09-2009, 12:52 PM
I felt that way too last week.

Someone who I know on the internet as a blogging friend dropped me from my friends on Facebook because I used some strong words and opinions. Luckily, she doesn't hate me and I said to the person "Maybe we're not ready to be friends on Facebook again".

The person has MySpace too, but I blocked that too so that once we cool down, I'll unblock the person and be their friend again.

TripperFan
05-09-2009, 01:33 PM
I know I'm guilty of this big time. Not so much ignoring me, although I've had that happen, and often I think they get fed up with me thinking I'm ignoring them.

I've found that they'll ask me to go out, but it's easier to stay in and get online with your friends there. It definitely IS laziness and it's a shame. I love going out and I know it would be so good for me. I don't know what it is. In a way, I was like this before the internet too.

And even on the internet. I know right now I owe YOU, Kimberlee, Janice and Lauren all long email updates (although Janice and I try to go with short ones recently). I haven't forgotten you or them, and often will chat with a quick post like this, but when it comes to getting down to the email - I'm bad!!

And the crazy thing is that I'll start out with just "a quick note to update" and next thing I know, it's become this long, huge email that I have sending because I hate getting them. They seem so intimidating to reply too!! LOL

I don't mind the odd one, but I did have one friend who's EVERY single email would be a book. And usually about the same thing - bitchin' about work. Needless to say, she's not on my "active" email list at the moment! :lol:


Bottom line is that true friends always understand. I don't get mad when you're not around - just concerned. And I always hope if I'm not hearing from someone, it's because they're life is going really well and they're out there having a great time! True friends always have you in the back of their mind anyway. :D

Brad Russ
05-09-2009, 11:56 PM
I just noticed that one of my friends on Facebook took me off her friend list, and I can't for the life of me understand why. This is the first time it's happened to me. We had been exchanging pleasant messages on each others pages and everything, and I see no reason why she'd do that. :confused: I ain't shedding any tears over it or anything, but it is frustrating when someone takes you off with no explaination. It's like, atleast have enough respect to tell me why you took me off. I just don't get people sometime. :rolleyes: Oh well, it's her loss.

MickeyMac
05-10-2009, 02:19 PM
I just noticed that one of my friends on Facebook took me off her friend list, and I can't for the life of me understand why. This is the first time it's happened to me. We had been exchanging pleasant messages on each others pages and everything, and I see no reason why she'd do that. :confused: I ain't shedding any tears over it or anything, but it is frustrating when someone takes you off with no explaination. It's like, atleast have enough respect to tell me why you took me off. I just don't get people sometime. :rolleyes: Oh well, it's her loss.



I've had that happen to me a few times on myspace. I am guessing they removed my from their friends list is because we didnt know each other well.