(AmericanLife TV):

(AmericanLife also has an OnDemand Service. This show might be one of the shows to watch.)

TV-G

All times are Eastern.

Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Shelia MacRae as Alice Kramden. Jean Kean as Trixie Norton.

The first VCR Plus Code is for the first showing. The second one is for the second showing.

Fri. Feb. 22, 2008 10p & Sat. Feb. 23, 2008 12a #42 - “The Honeymoon Is Over”: Mike Douglas guests as the Honeymooners are invited to plug the prize-winning song on Mike's show. And what a show it is: Ralph and Alice have an on-camera tiff that gets everyone into the act. (VCR Plus Codes: 9342/84648.)

Fri. Feb. 29, 2008 10p & Sat. Mar. 1, 2008 12a #43 – “Happiness Is a Rich Uncle”: Joey Heatherton guests as the go-go girl sweetheart of Alice's Uncle Howard (David Burns), an 83 year-old millionaire. Suspicious that she's gone-gone over Howard's gold, the Honeymooners decide to put Emily to the test -- with suave Norton as bait. (VCR Plus Codes: 2368/23994.)

"We're Off To See The Wizard":

(The girls are upset that the boys paid Emma and Clarance $200. Emma & Clarance fooled the boys ino thinking that there was buried treasure and sold them the map that guided them to the place where the "treasure" was for $200.)

Alice: "You two have cost us $200."

Ed: "$208. We paid Clarance $8 to borrow the shovel from him."

"Ralph's Big Mouth" (aka "Mind Your Own Business"):

Ed: "Suppose they don't give me the promotion?"

Ralph: "Then you scare them. Tell them that after 17 years in the sewer, you are finally washing your hands of the whole thing."

"Hair-Raising Tale":

(One of Ralph's failed inventions that was revealed in this episode was Glow in the Dark shoeshine polish.)

Ed: "Mr. Mitchell, would you like to try shoeshine polish that glows in the dark?"

Ralph (yells): "WILL YOU SHUT UP?"

"Funny Money":

Ralph: "This isn't enough room for this place for you and I."

Alice's Mom: "There isn't enough room for you and anybody."

"Funny Money":

Ralph: "One of these days, you are going to push me too far."

Alice's Mom: "The only thing that can push you is a bulldozer."

"Principle of The Thing":

(Ralph showed Alice the gaudy wallpaper.)

Ralph: "Well, what do you think?"

(Alice wraps up the wallpaper, puts it in Ralph's arms, puts Ralph's cap on him and opens the door.)

Alice: "And I don't want you to come back unless the man gives you your money back."

Ralph: "Don't hint Alice."

"Two For The Money":

Ralph: "All I can scrap was $8."

Ed: "Why don't you hock Alice's engagement ring?"

Ralph: "Where do you think I got the $8 from?"

"Out of Sight, Out of Mind":

(Ralph says that the convention is coming up and asks Alice to invite her mother to come by.)

Alice: "You are not getting a dime."

Ralph: "Then that BAT isn't getting in here."

"Hot Dog Stand":

Ralph: "On opening day, when the stand is jam packed with customers and photographers are lining up all over the joint, you won't be in the pictures."

Alice: "From this blow, I may never recover."

Credit goes to Yahoo! Groups You’re A Riot!, honeymooners.net., & tvguide.com.