View Full Version : Monday's Quotes:


Frank Gannucci
01-28-2008, 09:24 AM
"Cottage For Sale Part 1":

"Mr. Mosby": "I am going to do for you what I did for my mom when she wanted a cottage."

Ed: "You are going to buy one for us?"

"Cottage For Sale Part 1":

Ed: "The door is busted."

Alice: "Ed, don't be ridiculous. This is a dutch door."

Ed: "Boy those dutch people must be very short."

"A Weighty Problem Part 1":

Ed: "Well Ralph, what kind of day has it been today? Has it been a day like all others or one that illuminates our lives?"

Ralph (yells): "SHUT UP!"

"Young At Heart":

Ed: "You are supposed to waddle like a duck."

Ralph: "How can I do that?"

Ed: "It's easy. Just walk like you always do."

"Without Reservations":

(Ralph and Ed are in the run-down hotel.)

Ralph: "Would you stop with the wisecracks Norton? When the girls get here I wanna make a good impression!"

Ed: "If you wanna make a good impression, keep the door shut!"

"Opportunity Knocks, But":

(Ralph's boss made Ed Ralph's supervisor.)

Ralph: "It's not my pride."

Alice: "Well, your job is still the same."

Ralph: "Let's face it Alice. When Norton becomes my boss, I'm quitting."

Alice: "Why?"

Ralph: "I got my pride."

"Hot Tip" (Color version):

Ralph: "Where did you get that jacket?"

Ed: "That is what they are wearing down at the track."

Ralph: "Yeah, the horses. But not the people."

"Box Top Kid Part One":

Trixie: "Ed believes that before you go to Europe, you should see a bit of America first. So we made a list. So far this year, we have scratched off Bayoone, Yonkers & Scranton."

Alice: "What are you going to scratch off this year?"

Trixie: "I would like to scratch off Norton."

"People's Choice Part 1":

Ed: "You should go down to my Uncle's place in New Jersey. 'Bullets' will never find you there."

Ralph: "He won't?"

Ed: "No, I have been going down there for the past three Sundays in a row. I can't even find the place myself."

"One Big Happy Family":

Man (from upstairs, yells): "KNOCK OFF THE NOISE DOWN THERE!"

(Ralph goes to the window and sticks his head out.)

Ralph (yells): "SHUT UP BEFORE I REPORT YOU TO THE SUPERINTENDENT."

Man (from upstairs, yells): "I AM THE SUPERINTENDENT."