"Stars Over Faltbush":

Ralph: "Let's face it Alice. You are the fat of the land."

Alice: "Let's face it Ralph. You ARE the fat of the land."

"Teamwork Beats The Clock":

Ralph: "As usual, I am carrying the whole laod on my shoulders."

Alice: "You are carrying the laod all right but it's not on your shoulders."

"Young At Heart":

Ed: "As time wore on, I grew older. I matured."

Ralph: "Yeah, now you are a full-grown nut."

"Songwriters":

Ralph: "I wear the pants around this house."

Alice: "Belive me, those pants would fit around this house."

"We Spy":

Ralph: "When you are in a foreign country, you are supposed to act like a tourist and not a native."

Alice: "In Brooklyn, I live like a native."

"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":

Ralph: "How will they know that I am a member of the Hurricanes?"

Alice: "Just open your mouth."

"The $99,000 Answer":

Ralph: "$600. Peanuts, peanuts. What am I going to do with peanuts?"

Alice: "Eat 'em like any other elephant."

"Ralph Kramden Presents":

Ralph: "Jackie Gleason is down at that fun and sun capital of the world."

Ed: "What is he doing down at Perth Amboy?"