"Ralph's Sweet Tooth":

Ralph: "You are an idiot."

Ed: "Maybe I am, but I don't have a doorknob hanging out of my mouth."

"Man In The Blue Suit":

Ralph: "While I am gone, try not to give away anything in this apartment."

Alice: "I tried, but they wouldn't accept it."

"A Weighty Problem Part 1":

Ralph: "Look me over. Now describe my build to me."

Ed: "Well, if I were to do that, I would say that you have very well-developed muscles, got good bone structure, very good bone structure. Fine frame...and the whole thing is covered with fat."

"Funny Money":

Ralph: "Youa re to address me in a civil tongue."

Alice's Mom: "Oh, why don't you shut up?"

"The Golfer":

Ralph: "I got enough confidence in me for the both of us."

Alice: "You got enough of EVERYTHING in you for the both of us."

"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":

Alice: "There's an old wives tale Ralph. 'A man works from sun-to-sun, but a woman's work is never done.'"

Ralph: "Good gosh!"

"Be It Ever So Humble":

Ralph: "How do you like your new apartment?"

Trixie: "That's a very dangerous question to ask me when I have a hammer in my hand."

"Out of Sight, Out of Mind":

Ed: "You can't put a square box into a round hole."

Ralph: "Why not? You put your head into your hat, don't you?"

"Out of Sight, Out of Mind":

Ed: "Nobody is going to put you in a straightjacket."

Ralph: "Thank you Norton."

Ed: "Where are they going to find one big enough?"