I've seen threads like this on other boards (here and elsewhere) so I thought I'd start one for TMTMS and see if it gets any interest. Basically, you try and come up w/ lines that you'd never hear on TMTMS. Try to keep them clean, but funny!

Lou: Ted, I don't want to risk losing you to another station, so I'm giving you a raise!

Ted (Handing someone a $5 bill):Keep the change.

:lol:

We'd never hear Lou say "You're fired" to Mary and really mean it.

Rhoda: I LOVE how I look!

Phyllis: Rhoda, you're my best friend.

Murray: Ted, you an a GREAT anchorman.

Mary: Hiya, Lou!

:lol:

MURRAY: I just won the Pulitzer Prize!!!!
TED: That's wonderful, Murr! How many of them are you getting?

:rolleyes:

Bumping this thread up, b/c I'm bored. LOL

Lou:Sure, Mary, I'd LOVE to come to your party!
Lou:The Happy Homemaker is my favorite show!
Sue Ann:How do I get a restraining order? Lou won't leave me alone!
Murray:Ted, you're one of the smartest people I know. It's such an honor to write for you!

Ted Baxter, you are the new champion of Jeopardy!! :lol:

Ted:I can't go out tonight, Georgette. I'm going to my first MENSA meeting!

:lol:

Rhoda: Mary, you're so fat, you should go on a diet.

Sue Ann: I'm going to become a nun and be celibate.

Murray: Ted, will you teach me everything you know about journalism? I'd like to learn from one of the greats.

Sue Ann: "How the hell would I know how to get coffee stains off a white shirt?"

Ted: "I actually met Einstein shortly before his death in 1955, I politely pointed out the errors in his theory of relativity and he told me that I was absolutely right....but , he never got the chance to change it!"

Georgette: "Ted, i am SO sick of the way you treat me like some kind of toy, I want a divorce, you %#$^%#!!!"


Lou: "No I don't want to go to a hockey game Murray, I have tickets to the ballet!"

Lou: Alcohol? I'd never touch the stuff!!

:rofl:

Mary: "Ted, that impromptu editorial you came up with on Women's Liberation was fair and balanced!"

Lou: "Scotch and I just aren't getting along these days."

Murray: "Good one, Ted!"

Ted: "Hmmm...I really don't get the joke...I'd better keep my mouth shut."

Sue Ann: "I'm driving by this Marine base, but I'm not going to stop."

Rhoda: "This looks better on me than it would look on Mary!"

Phyllis: "Sometimes I'm embarrassed because I think Lars is brighter than me."

Georgette: "I've gotta stop this swearing. It's not ladylike!"

Lou: OK, today's the day I am finally going to pay off my entire tab to Happy Hour Bar!!

:brent

Rhoda: "Hey Mary, what are you chewing?" Mary: "It's gum i scraped off my shoe!"

Lou (singing): "I feel pretyyyyyy, oh so prettyyyyy...."

Murray: "I'll punch out the first one in this newsroom who says anything bad about Sue-Ann, she's a paragon of virtue!"

Murry's wife, Marie: "Oh God, Murray, pick me up like the caveman you are.....you are SO macho!!!"

Sue-Ann: "Make sure the prop cake is ready, you know I can't even make toast, never mind cook something!"

Lou:I want to ask Sue Ann out, but I'm kind of nervous. Would YOU talk to her for me, Mary?

Murray:Lou, I think Ted is really underpaid. You should give him a raise right away!

Mary (At her job interview with Lou): "Well Mr Grant, my last job was acting in stag films."

Ted: "Working at that 50000 watt radio station ruined my life!"

Lou: "Damn it Ted, you're the most talented newscaster I've ever worked with!"

Phyllis: "I'm sorry Lars, I've been having an affair.........with Rhoda!"

lou hey ted i just got a call from walter cronkite he recommend to the news department over there that you replace him during his next vacation instead of roger mudd

Murray: Ted you are a very smart person. :)

Mary to Lou: "How about trying something new and getting your own damn cup of coffee!"