is in session.

Karly mentioned that we should have, like, an SO therapy group, so I thought I'm just gonna start an official therapy session thread. Here, we can all air out our battles with depression, anxiety, your never-ending job battles...whatever has been bugging your for a long time. It's not just a, "I hate algebra", bitching kind of thread...that's for the Complaint Department.

Oh, and I don't want anyone in here that is coming in just to make fun or tease or any other immature **** like that. It's rude and not the least bit helpful. But if you wanna post and help out, feel free to post.

Hopefully we can kind of lean on each other for support. :)


*if this should be somewhere else, feel free to move it*

Cool Idea!!

Like Dr. Phil Online !! ;)

Cool Idea!!

Like Dr. Phil Online !! ;)

And with better hair. :lol:

I'm a psychology major so this should be up my alley :)

Horray for SOL Therapy! :)

Ha, I need a diet plan to control my bingeing. :p

Horray for SOL Therapy! :)
SOL therapy. lol it makes sense..

And with better hair. :lol:



THAT ain't hard to do!!!!

Now how's THAT workin' for ya??!!! :lol:

Horray for SOL Therapy! :)

Ha, I need a diet plan to control my bingeing. :p


You need a bonk over the head my friend!! You know yourself what you need to do - nobody needs to tell you - you know it already!! You're the smartest binger I know!! Just won't apply it to the most important person in your life!! :crazy: :p

I'm sick of being so ****ing with drawn and afraid of people I like the most. **** me.

I'm tired of not getting emails back and thinking it's because I'm being ignored.

I'm tired of not getting emails back and thinking it's because I'm being ignored.I need help. I'm not as happy as I use to be. I think this is a really good idea to set up something here for everyone to talk and we should keep this going.

i just want to be able to talk to people without having panic attacks. i don't care about depression anymore. i'm so damn used to feeling this way i don't consciously notice it.

i just want to be able to talk to people without having panic attacks. i don't care about depression anymore. i'm so damn used to feeling this way i don't consciously notice it.

I wish I didn't notice it.

Actually, I also wish that I didn't let the people that cause it to get to me. I'm so lame.

Amanda drives me up a ****ing wall and it seems no matter what I do, its never good enough for her. I was talking to her earlier and this is the gist of it.

- I have plans all weekend for my birthday. Saturday Im going to Jeanines to sleepover and shes talking me out. Monday Im going to a concert about 2 hours away from Amandas place (so about 4.5 hours from me or more, depending on how stupid I am -.-) with a friend Ive never met, but we go to all the same Clay concerts.

- She asked me to sleepover. I told her I dont know what time Ill be back on Monday since its so far away.

- So she asks me to sleep over Sunday into Monday. I said ok, but Ill need to take a shower since I wont be home all weekend.

- She then tells me to come over at 1 on Sunday. I tell her I dont know if Jeanine had any other plans or anything, so Id try.

- She gets pissy and says shes 5 min. down the road from Jeanine and so I tell her I know, but shes said nothing else about other plans so I cant really make any promises.

- So then she gets all... 'nevermind' 'forget about it' blah blah blah.

And she wonders why I never want to come down to visit her.

You need a bonk over the head my friend!! You know yourself what you need to do - nobody needs to tell you - you know it already!! You're the smartest binger I know!! Just won't apply it to the most important person in your life!! :crazy: :pHaha, I'm the smartest binger you know? Awww...Err.....gee....thanks??? LOL! :p

And I'm doing a "tad" bit better, I suppose. The last two days I've had 1960 and 1900 cals, respectively, which is considerly low (as opposed to 6000 cals). But the only reason I haven't been bingeing is because my stomach hurts. The emotional turmoil is still here:(

On the side note, I think I may be going a bit nuts, too. I took a permanent marker yesterday and scribbled messages onto my stomach. "Fat fat fat... idiot... binge no more... look what you've done...etc etc" :eek: :blush: Quite a challenge, might I add considering it's SO darn big and round and stuff! :mad:

Sarah: I get panic attacks a lot, too. But as of late, I've gotten much better. Like with anything, it just takes practice. What I do now is... just GO for it!!! If it helps, just think of yourself as someone else, and then you'll be less scared/anxious. Actors are sometimes known to do the same thing. Does that make any sense?

I don't think I need some threapy, but i could really use a hug right about now...

;)

Ok... I seriously need therapy right now. I had the worse day EVER today. This morning me, my sister, and her friend drove down to Cape May for no apparent reason. For the last few days I've been really upset about everything and I've been feeling like complete crap. So when my sister started blatently insulting me and telling me how much of a loser I was this morning in the car, I couldn't help to just start crying [ugh, I hate being so sensitive]. We made it down to Cape May and ate lunch and stuff and everything was okay [well, I still felt horrible but I had stopped crying]. Then I found out that my parents didn't know that we were going down there. So we got home at like 6:30 and both of my parents were really angry. My dad left for basketball right after we got home. I mentioned to my mother [who is like half drunk right now] that me and my sister had been fighting earlier in the day and that I had gotten really upset. So my very intelligent mother decided that screaming at my sister to stop being such a bitch to me would help difuse the problem. She made things 10x worse trying to defend me.

Now I'm here alone and I can't stop crying. I feel like everyone either hates me or ignores me. I can't talk to anyone about it either because they always just think I had one bad day and I'm being dramatic. I don't know what to do anymore. I have absolutely NO friends, and no one in my family will ever understand. And on top of everything I feel like everyone's just going to read this and think I'm being ridiculous.

Ok... I seriously need therapy right now. I had the worse day EVER today. This morning me, my sister, and her friend drove down to Cape May for no apparent reason. For the last few days I've been really upset about everything and I've been feeling like complete crap. So when my sister started blatently insulting me and telling me how much of a loser I was this morning in the car, I couldn't help to just start crying [ugh, I hate being so sensitive]. We made it down to Cape May and ate lunch and stuff and everything was okay [well, I still felt horrible but I had stopped crying]. Then I found out that my parents didn't know that we were going down there. So we got home at like 6:30 and both of my parents were really angry. My dad left for basketball right after we got home. I mentioned to my mother [who is like half drunk right now] that me and my sister had been fighting earlier in the day and that I had gotten really upset. So my very intelligent mother decided that screaming at my sister to stop being such a bitch to me would help difuse the problem. She made things 10x worse trying to defend me.

Now I'm here alone and I can't stop crying. I feel like everyone either hates me or ignores me. I can't talk to anyone about it either because they always just think I had one bad day and I'm being dramatic. I don't know what to do anymore. I have absolutely NO friends, and no one in my family will ever understand. And on top of everything I feel like everyone's just going to read this and think I'm being ridiculous.
I don't think you're rediculous. What's rediculous is parents instilling fear into their own kids that they can't tell them anything. You think maybe you could at least TRY talking to them? :( I don't know, I know it's really hard. You're the same age I was when it hit me. Things just build up until you can't take it anymore. I missed so much school that year because I'd be too scared to go, scared of teachers, scared of the other kids...all I wanted to do was sit home away from the world. It's gotten better, not the best it can be, but better. I hope the same can go for you. :( :bighug:

I don't think you're rediculous. What's rediculous is parents instilling fear into their own kids that they can't tell them anything. You think maybe you could at least TRY talking to them? :( I don't know, I know it's really hard. You're the same age I was when it hit me. Things just build up until you can't take it anymore. I missed so much school that year because I'd be too scared to go, scared of teachers, scared of the other kids...all I wanted to do was sit home away from the world. It's gotten better, not the best it can be, but better. I hope the same can go for you. :( :bighug:

My parents don't instill fear in me, they just don't understand how I feel. I am so grateful that I have my father. He does so much for me and he had spoiled me so much my entire life. But whenever I try to approach him about this, it always sounds like I'm just whining so he doesn't really take me seriously. I don't know.

My parents don't instill fear in me, they just don't understand how I feel. I am so grateful that I have my father. He does so much for me and he had spoiled me so much my entire life. But whenever I try to approach him about this, it always sounds like I'm just whining so he doesn't really take me seriously. I don't know.
Well that's good that you have someone to talk to. Maybe just keep bringing it up? He'll have to get the idea eventually. It's not fair when that stuff isn't taken seriously.

Sarah: I get panic attacks a lot, too. But as of late, I've gotten much better. Like with anything, it just takes practice. What I do now is... just GO for it!!! If it helps, just think of yourself as someone else, and then you'll be less scared/anxious. Actors are sometimes known to do the same thing. Does that make any sense?
Hmm... that could help. i've tried countless times to pretend the other person is someone i'm close to but it hardly works. i always get the impression that i'm standing out, only my mistakes are being noticed, i'm making an ass of myself by just talking and standing and acting in the manner i use, and i try to remember that they're only looking at me as they would anyone else but it's hard. i don't really care about tightening up and having body spasms as much as i wish my mind wouldn't go totally blank as soon as someone i don't know well approaches.

Hmm... that could help. i've tried countless times to pretend the other person is someone i'm close to but it hardly works. i always get the impression that i'm standing out, only my mistakes are being noticed, i'm making an ass of myself by just talking and standing and acting in the manner i use, and i try to remember that they're only looking at me as they would anyone else but it's hard. i don't really care about tightening up and having body spasms as much as i wish my mind wouldn't go totally blank as soon as someone i don't know well approaches.
God, do I know the feeling. I can't ****ing stand it.

Tired of feeling depressed, I took the ultimate stupid ass route and consumed an entire bottle of Merlot. Then I watched 2 hours worth of music concerts and videos..crying :rolleyes: and there was this one particular song by Queen that really made me cry..it was called These are the Days of Our Lives..the lyrics are incredible!


Sometimes I get the Feelin'
I was back in the old days-long ago
When we were kids when we were young
Things seemed so perfect-you know
THe days were endless we were crazy we were young
The sun was always shinning- we just lived for fun
Sometimes it seems like lately-I just do not know
The rest of my life's been just a show.

Those were the days of our lives
The bad things in life were so few
Those were the days are all gone now but one thing is true
When I look and I find I still love you.


You can't turn back the clock you can't turn back the tide
Ain't that a shame!
I'd like to go back one time on a roller coaster ride
When life was just a game
No use in sitting and thinking on what you did
When you can lay back and enjoy it through your kids
Sometimes it seems like lately-I just do not know
Better sit back and go through the flow.

Cos these are the days of our lives
They've flown in the swiftness of time
These days are all gone now but some things remain
When I look and I find no change


Those are the days of our lives-Yeah
The bad things in life were so few
Those days are gone now but one thing's still true
When I look and I find
I still love you......I still love you

What a powerful song. So true, too. We tend to take good moments for granted as they happen. But as soon as something bad strikes, wewish that they could've lasted forever.

Sarah:
Take things slowly. Start off by approaching some people to just say "hi." And when you're comfortable saying "hi," start constructing some sentences as well... pretty soon you'll be yapping away like there's no tomorrow. :p Of course this can't happen overnight, so be patient. Keep working at it, and you'll succeed in the long run. (It'll be well worth the time, too! ;))

Ha... so much for "doing better." Binged tonight. :(

I don't think I need some threapy, but i could really use a hug right about now...

;)And a mentor, too. :p

:bighug: Here yah go!

What a powerful song. So true, too. We tend to take good moments for granted as they happen. But as soon as something bad strikes, wewish that they could've lasted forever.

Sarah:
Take things slowly. Start off by approaching some people to just say "hi." And when you're comfortable saying "hi," start constructing some sentences as well... pretty soon you'll be yapping away like there's no tomorrow. :p Of course this can't happen overnight, so be patient. Keep working at it, and you'll succeed in the long run. (It'll be well worth the time, too! ;))

Ha... so much for "doing better." Binged tonight. :(
God, that is the truth...Happiness is a gift and should not be taken for granted..because tomorrow you could find yourself in my situation..suffering from depression... :(

I sure could some therapy right now too. I think alot of things have brought
me down lately. Maybe I feel depressed because I don't have a good paying
job right now. I don't mind babysitting,but I just don't want do it all my life.
My niece suggested I start liking a babysitting service or day care center.
I smiled at her but turned down the offer. I've babysitting since I was 15
and I think after this I will only do it occasionally on weekends.
Anyways my visual problems also.I can't drive a vehicle so I must
find means of transportation. Two of my cousins have already agreed
to drive me when I started a job. They live in the same town so they
don't mind and their mother has told me the same thing. They're so
understanding.They never tease about my eyesight or anything.
But the communication right now is with my parents, I'll find a way
to communicate with them. Maybe I need medication like my mom.
She takes Paxil for anxiety. I know my problem is more than that.
My insomnia,tantrums,mood swings and frustration. Maybe my vision
problems are causing me to act that way.I just hope I never have an
outburst of anger in front of my eye doctor. She's nice to me even
though she tends ignore my questions but if I ever had an outburst
in front of her I'd never forgive myself. Last time I got mad at her
and she told me she knew I was angry but I needed to calm down
and cooperate so she could get the examination done.
But I'm ya'll are starting this in order to help us all here at SO.

Ok... I seriously need therapy right now. I had the worse day EVER today. This morning me, my sister, and her friend drove down to Cape May for no apparent reason. For the last few days I've been really upset about everything and I've been feeling like complete crap. So when my sister started blatently insulting me and telling me how much of a loser I was this morning in the car, I couldn't help to just start crying [ugh, I hate being so sensitive]. We made it down to Cape May and ate lunch and stuff and everything was okay [well, I still felt horrible but I had stopped crying]. Then I found out that my parents didn't know that we were going down there. So we got home at like 6:30 and both of my parents were really angry. My dad left for basketball right after we got home. I mentioned to my mother [who is like half drunk right now] that me and my sister had been fighting earlier in the day and that I had gotten really upset. So my very intelligent mother decided that screaming at my sister to stop being such a bitch to me would help difuse the problem. She made things 10x worse trying to defend me.

Now I'm here alone and I can't stop crying. I feel like everyone either hates me or ignores me. I can't talk to anyone about it either because they always just think I had one bad day and I'm being dramatic. I don't know what to do anymore. I have absolutely NO friends, and no one in my family will ever understand. And on top of everything I feel like everyone's just going to read this and think I'm being ridiculous.Wow. I'm so sorry to hear about that. It's like you took the words out of my mouth in the last paragraph! I would never think you are ridiculous!! Sometimes, I can't stop crying. I hate the people in this town. They don't get me. My family is. . . not even close to a family. Just a bunch of people who can't stop fighting and judging one another. I think you're wrong about one thing, you have friends now. :)

I don't think I need some threapy, but i could really use a hug right about now...

;)


*HUG!!!* :D

Horray for SOL Therapy! :)

Ha, I need a diet plan to control my bingeing. :p

Hey,

I'm in the same boat you are...Maybe we can work through this together? :)

I need help. I'm not as happy as I use to be. I think this is a really good idea to set up something here for everyone to talk and we should keep this going.


Hey hon,

I'm hear for you if you want to talk about anything. You can mention what's up on this thread or PM it to me :) I am feeling pretty much the same way so maybe we can find out what's bothering us.

Maybe my vision
problems are causing me to act that way.I just hope I never have an
outburst of anger in front of my eye doctor. I can relate with the eyesight thing. From '99 to '04, I went without 20/20 vision and it was just the most horrible thing in the world. Everytime I tried to read the board in school, I couldn't, and that would frustrate me. I would throw tantrums, too, and spend many nights crying because I was suffering so much from not being able to see, take notes, etc, [and when my parents found out, they didn't get me glasses, either. They just teased me and taunted me for "sitting too close to the TV," "spending too many hrs in front of the computer," blah blah blah. They blamed ME for something I think I had no control over.... I was only 11 then. :(]. So yeah, then five years later, I finally got the "courage" and got glasses MYSELF. It has been about 6 mths since I've gotten them........ and my parents STILL have NO idea. I hide them in my bookbag, and oftentimes I would have "panic attacks" because I fear they might just find them. :( Sorry to writing an essay, LOL, but I just thought I would share. Anyway, bottom line, I think your vision may play a big role in the way you are feeling right now.

Hey,

I'm in the same boat you are...Maybe we can work through this together? :)Really? Do you have an ED, too?

Now I'm here alone and I can't stop crying. I feel like everyone either hates me or ignores me. I can't talk to anyone about it either because they always just think I had one bad day and I'm being dramatic. I don't know what to do anymore. I have absolutely NO friends, and no one in my family will ever understand. And on top of everything I feel like everyone's just going to read this and think I'm being ridiculous.
That PRECISELY sums up how i always feel. i know what it's like. :( when my depression really kicks in, which is EASILY triggered by being hurt socially, i get an incredible feeling of hopelessness, i feel empty, worthless, hated, overdramatic, stupid, i want to die, if i'm pissed off about what someone did to me i want to kill myself to get back at them, which has been attempted once. and the only way i can get rid of most of those feelings right away is by hurting myself.

i was just realizing the other night that part of the reason i feel so alone is because my mom is gone. there's just been something missing since she died. i feel like i'm all on my own in getting through life socially and achieving my aspirations. she helped me with those, unlike my dad. my emotional health has been spiraling out of control. i'm just all by myself now. when i see other girls my age with their moms i want to rage. it's not fair that i'm the only one without one.

and anyone who thinks you're being ridiculous is a dick. i tend to not talk about my suicidal tendencies too much on here, partly because i'd look like an attention whore, not just to other people but to me. but this is the only place i can talk about my feelings, and the people who say i "have all these problems and take them out on people here/try to get attention" are idiots and don't know what in god's name they're talking about. they don't know me and they don't know my emotional needs or availabilities, while i do.

i was just remembering today how when i was six i frequently said "i hate everything and everyone is stupid".

That PRECISELY sums up how i always feel. i know what it's like. :( when my depression really kicks in, which is EASILY triggered by being hurt socially, i get an incredible feeling of hopelessness, i feel empty, worthless, hated, overdramatic, stupid, i want to die, if i'm pissed off about what someone did to me i want to kill myself to get back at them, which has been attempted once. and the only way i can get rid of most of those feelings right away is by hurting myself.

but this is the only place i can talk about my feelings, and the people who say i "have all these problems and take them out on people here/try to get attention" are idiots and don't know what in god's name they're talking about. Exactly! There is a difference between being an attention whore and crying out for help.

And Sarah, you should really try to find another coping mechanism. Instead of hurting your physically (to lower the emotional pains), you should try to confront people [in the physical life, not just online] about your problems. (Look who's talking! :lol: )

But yeah.. More people care about you than you think. Seek help and yee shall find it. :)

Holy cow... this April's Fool's theme is BRIGHT! :eek:

Wow! If that don't wake you up! :cool:

I don't think you're rediculous. What's rediculous is parents instilling fear into their own kids that they can't tell them anything.

I love the fact that I can at least talk to my parents. My dad doesn't understand anything I tell him, but he listens. But I usually just talk to my mom.

I'm just wondering how does your vision affect your behavior? Behavior and vision aren't related. Not being able too see can cause massive amounts of frustrations. Also, having to be dependent on other people can lower self-worth.

I think this whole concept for this thread is an excellent idea :)
My depression is a chemical imbalance, and when I am down..I am down, and the for the last few days I have been terribly depressed, to the point where I thought I would never be happy again, it is like being in a bad dream and you cannot wake up...it was really ****ing bad last night, I had the whole bull**** "happy" facade in front of my family and friends, and once I was alone, I wanted to drive away, literally, I was in my car and I was so ****ing tempted to just drive away...

I sure could some therapy right now too. I think alot of things have brought
me down lately. Maybe I feel depressed because I don't have a good paying
job right now. I don't mind babysitting,but I just don't want do it all my life.
My niece suggested I start liking a babysitting service or day care center.
I smiled at her but turned down the offer. I've babysitting since I was 15
and I think after this I will only do it occasionally on weekends.
Anyways my visual problems also.I can't drive a vehicle so I must
find means of transportation. Two of my cousins have already agreed
to drive me when I started a job. They live in the same town so they
don't mind and their mother has told me the same thing. They're so
understanding.They never tease about my eyesight or anything.
But the communication right now is with my parents, I'll find a way
to communicate with them. Maybe I need medication like my mom.
She takes Paxil for anxiety. I know my problem is more than that.
My insomnia,tantrums,mood swings and frustration. Maybe my vision
problems are causing me to act that way.I just hope I never have an
outburst of anger in front of my eye doctor. She's nice to me even
though she tends ignore my questions but if I ever had an outburst
in front of her I'd never forgive myself. Last time I got mad at her
and she told me she knew I was angry but I needed to calm down
and cooperate so she could get the examination done.
But I'm ya'll are starting this in order to help us all here at SO.

Maybe a combo of medication and talking to a therapist would work best for you. If your mom is already on Paxil, you could have a similar problem. I think these things tend to run in families.

Really? Do you have an ED, too?


I used to make myself throw up. Not so much any more, but yes, I did do it.

Speaking of throw up, what's with this new color scheme?! :happyface

these board colors are going to give me seziures and induce pts

quote: If that don't wake you up!


Believe me I know. I just meant that misbehaving based on eye problems doesn't go hand in hand.Well, I can't argue with that. But sometimes you can't help yourself. ;)

I used to make myself throw up. Not so much any more, but yes, I did do it.Ohh.. how'd you stop? :(

and once I was alone, I wanted to drive away, literally, I was in my car and I was so ****ing tempted to just drive away...

OMG...I wanted to do that today. I wanted to just...escape. Run from the stress I'm putting myself thru wondering why Boy #1 and Boy #2 have disappeared/won't talk to me, whatever. But even if I ran, I'd still be thinking about it.

OMG...I wanted to do that today. I wanted to just...escape. Run from the stress I'm putting myself thru wondering why Boy #1 and Boy #2 have disappeared/won't talk to me, whatever. But even if I ran, I'd still be thinking about it.
I was sooo ****ing close of to drive all the way to Arizona (about a 2 1/2 hour drive from where I live) and drown my sorrows at this border state casino...but instead I a drank an entire of bottle of red wine and cried for hours and hours, which of course was STUPID, but it made me feel worse and also made me sick...The reason why I feel like ****, is because of a chemical imbalance, also my mom's illiness and also an anniversary of someone who I used to love more than anything in this world, death...so right now I feel triple ****ty...

I was sooo ****ing close of to drive all the way to Arizona (about a 2 1/2 hour drive from where I live) and drown my sorrows at this border state casino...but instead I a drank an entire of bottle of red wine and cried for hours and hours, which of course was STUPID, but it made me feel worse and also made me sick...The reason why I feel like ****, is because of a chemical imbalance, also my mom's illiness and also an anniversary of someone who I used to love more than anything in this world, death...so right now I feel triple ****ty...

:( :hug:

I guess the reason it suprises me that some people act up and then relate it to their vision is because I would have never been allowed to get away with that. My mother wouldn't have tolerated that one bit. Regardless of the fact that I've always had bad vision, I was still expected to behave like everyone else. I would have ended up in sooo much trouble if I had tried throwing a temper tantrum and then explaining why I did, 'because I'm frustrationed because I can't see, ....". I guess when you have a more understanding parent it's different.Well, neither of my parents know about my eyesight [anymore]. They have long set it aside and chose not to do anything about it. THEY, as parents, should've brought me to an optician, but they never did. Instead, they spent months taunting me for something I couldn't help. So can you blame me for having been frustrated? I'm still a minor, I shouldn't have had to go to the Opt all by myself. I shouldn't have had to suffer so unnecessarily for 5 years. I shouldn't have had to work to dig up 200 bucks all by myself to buy specs at age 16 when my parents CAN very well afford them.. and not only afford them, but can afford to squander money on luxuries (ie: antiques), too. There's nothing to tolerate here. I can justify my behavior(s)... and I have every right to throw a tantrum. I have been done wrong. Downright neglected. And that maddens me like you would not believe. :mad: And like I said, I now have to hide my glasses. How is this a way to live? Hiding????

:( :hug:
Thanks Luv... :)

Well, neither of my parents know about my eyesight [anymore]. They have long set it aside and chose not to do anything about it. THEY, as parents, should've brought me to an optician, but they never did. Instead, they spent months taunting me for something I couldn't help. So can you blame me for having been frustrated? I'm still a minor, I shouldn't have had to go to the Opt all by myself. I shouldn't have had to suffer so unnecessarily for 5 years. I shouldn't have had to work to dig up 200 bucks all by myself to buy specs at age 16 when my parents CAN very well afford them.. and not only afford them, but can afford to squander money on luxuries (ie: antiques), too. There's nothing to tolerate here. I can justify my behavior(s)... and I have every right to throw a tantrum. I have been done wrong. Downright neglected. And that maddens me like you would not believe. :mad: And like I said, I now have to hide my glasses. How is this a way to live? Hiding????

:( That really sucks that you have to hide glasses of all things. Most people are hiding nudie mags or other crap like that.

:( That really sucks that you have to hide glasses of all things. Most people are hiding nudie mags or other crap like that.Oh, and this isn't the ONLY thing I'm hiding... I'm hiding my binges, my purging, my exercising-- candy wrappers, the whole enchilada. I also hide lotions [because my dad doesn't like them]. I hide shaving products, too... and when I first got my period back when, I hid it from them for 1.5 years. I was forced to tell 'cause we were on vacation & I wasn't prepared. Yeah... bullsh.it, huh? :rolleyes: And no, this isn't an April's Fool joke. LOL.

Ohh.. how'd you stop? :(


I'm not sure really. I was doing it on and off since 6th grade and I gradually acquired more self esteem and learned ways to cope, I suppose. I went to therapy for a while too.

How about yourself? How long have you been doing it?

I'm not sure really. I was doing it on and off since 6th grade and I gradually acquired more self esteem and learned ways to cope, I suppose. I went to therapy for a while too.

How about yourself? How long have you been doing it?I think self-esteem is a big part of the issue here. Sigh. I swear I am the biggest pig alive. :(

I've only recently started purging.... I can't remember when, tho. Summer of '04, I suppose. BUT, I have tried numerous of other times. I seldom purge tho, honest. ;) I'm a binger all the way. I can eat so much like you would not believe. I LOVE food, and am [unfortunately] addicted to it. I think my record was 10,000 cals, haha. But on average, my cal intake is around 3000-6000 cals, which is errrrr.... high. :blush: I've spoken to a teacher about this... she said she would find me someone to speak to. But she isn't really too devoted, to say the least... it's been months... still no progress. I have only gotten worse.

That's wrong. You're parents should have taken you to the doctor and bought you classes, or if they have insurance have the insurance pay for it. You're entitled to how you feel. I've felt like that many times. I just simply meant that I wasn't able to epxession my frustration growing up because I had a strict parent. Even though I had justifible reasons to feel frustrated and such I wasn't able to do anything about it. I guess in a way that's good and bad. Bad that frustration can't be expressed, but good since such behavior can be 'addictive'. I mean that you get used to acting in a certain way and then you continue to do so because no one has told you other wise. I didn't mean that you couldn't be upset. Believe me I absolutely hate have bad vision, but I can't do anything about it. My vision can't be corrected through glasses or any other means so I have no other choice but to just deal with it. I'm glad you were able to get glasses and that they have helped you. It's a shame that you have to hide them from your parents. Maybe one day they'll realize their mistakes.Ahh, I see. Yeah, there can be pro's and cons. I think one major drawback, however, would be that you would have to be forced to keep many of your feelings bottled up inside, you know? And at any waking moment, you can have a "break down" so to speak. And rather than expressing your feelings verbally, you may do so in other, harmful ways. But that's just a sterotype, of course. It doesn't apply to everyone. I'm sorry to hear your vision can't be corrected, but I am happy to know that you've learnt to accept it and deal with it. In any case, my parents aren't very... caring. My dad's abusive, and my mom just doesn't care. But... ah well, I'll live.

I think self-esteem is a big part of the issue here. Sigh. I swear I am the biggest pig alive. :(

I've only recently started purging.... I can't remember when, tho. Summer of '04, I suppose. BUT, I have tried numerous of other times. I seldom purge tho, honest. ;) I'm a binger all the way. I can eat so much like you would not believe. I LOVE food, and am [unfortunately] addicted to it. I think my record was 10,000 cals, haha. But on average, my cal intake is around 3000-6000 cals, which is errrrr.... high. :blush: I've spoken to a teacher about this... she said she would find me someone to speak to. But she isn't really too devoted, to say the least... it's been months... still no progress. I have only gotten worse.


I can totally relate. Self esteem is definately the issue here. We fill ourselves up on food because we don't feel "full" in other aspects of our lives-- we feel empty. The binging thing you mentioned sounds a lot like me. I tend to binge and NOT purge as much, just like yourself(whereas I used to do a whole lot of purging when I was younger). Now, do you feel like it's your weight that's the cause of low self esteem or is it your low self esteem that causes you to overeat?

I can totally relate. Self esteem is definately the issue here. We fill ourselves up on food because we don't feel "full" in other aspects of our lives-- we feel empty. The binging thing you mentioned sounds a lot like me. I tend to binge and NOT purge as much, just like yourself(whereas I used to do a whole lot of purging when I was younger). Now, do you feel like it's your weight that's the cause of low self esteem or is it your low self esteem that causes you to overeat?Hmm... I think my parents pay a big role in my self-esteem. I don't feel comfortable around them, at ALL. My dad... he's well, abusive: physically, emotionally, and err.. se.ually..... so yeah, I don't care too much for my body. I HATE it. I don't believe it will be worth a penny until I can get it down to my goal weight.... and whilst the facts will argue, I continue to believe this. Thin = happiness... as crazy as that sounds.

I think the reason why I dont purge a lot is because I HATE purging. I hate the fact of staying in the bathroom for a hour... purging. :rolleyes: It's just stupid. Plus, I have braces, so my dentist will find out if I do it frequently. ;)

****, I love to eat myself and also have been battling eating disorders all of my adult life; right now I either strave myself or I job 9 miles (which burns 1350 calories) and I do not eat 1350 ****ing calories...but a friend of mine thinks the reason why I am depressed right now because I do not have a lot of body fat ( :confused: )..I am thinking.."What!" this man is blind. I am a ****ing perfectionist, and I always have been exceptionally hard on myself. So I totally understand the whol ****ed up eating disorder thing. I grew up in superfical California, where more than half of the women here have eating disorders...

Hmm... I think my parents pay a big role in my self-esteem. I don't feel comfortable around them, at ALL. My dad... he's well, abusive: physically, emotionally, and err.. se.ually..... so yeah, I don't care too much for my body. I HATE it. I don't believe it will be worth a penny until I can get it down to my goal weight.... and whilst the facts will argue, I continue to believe this. Thin = happiness... as crazy as that sounds.

I think the reason why I dont purge a lot is because I HATE purging. I hate the fact of staying in the bathroom for a hour... purging. :rolleyes: It's just stupid. Plus, I have braces, so my dentist will find out if I do it frequently. ;)


Hehehe, I had braces too and those dentists know a lot of things.....those sneaky bastards ;)

It sounds like a lot of your frustration is from your father...man, I feel like I'm talking to my twin here :lol: I have problems with my dad too but we're just not close. I feel bad that your dad abuses you like that :( How horrible. Considering what you've been through, I can understand how you'd have issues with your weight-- your dad never really made you feel comfortable with yourself and you don't appear to be getting support from the mom. And you're right- I think there's this stigma for being overweight. Like we can't be beautiful or anything :rolleyes: It's hard to love ourselves when we're constantly being thought of as worthless, isn't it?

****, I love to eat myself and also have been battling eating disorders all of my adult life; right now I either strave myself or I job 9 miles (which burns 1350 calories) and I do not eat 1350 ****ing calories...but a friend of mine thinks the reason why I am depressed right now because I do not have a lot of body fat ( :confused: )..I am thinking.."What!" this man is blind. I am a ****ing perfectionist, and I always have been exceptionally hard on myself. So I totally understand the whol ****ed up eating disorder thing. I grew up in superfical California, where more than half of the women here have eating disorders...To seek perfection is a flaw. Wow... I just made up a wise quote. Go me! Ha. But it's true. Nobody can be perfect. Nobody IS. And even if they "are," someone else will always think otherwise.

Anyway, it's 1:23am on my end and I still have stuff to do... like exercise, LOL!
TTYL. :wave:

Anyway, it's 1:23am on my end and I still have stuff to do... like exercise, LOL!
TTYL. :wave:


Have a good night :)

****, I love to eat myself and also have been battling eating disorders all of my adult life; right now I either strave myself or I job 9 miles (which burns 1350 calories) and I do not eat 1350 ****ing calories...but a friend of mine thinks the reason why I am depressed right now because I do not have a lot of body fat ( :confused: )..I am thinking.."What!" this man is blind. I am a ****ing perfectionist, and I always have been exceptionally hard on myself. So I totally understand the whol ****ed up eating disorder thing. I grew up in superfical California, where more than half of the women here have eating disorders...


Yeah, it's so hard not to strive to be perfect when it seems like everyone around us is more beautiful. But, alas, we all have our own flaws and imperfections(some of us more than others :lol: ) and we're all virtually the same inside! I try to remember that when I'm feeling down on myself.

Yeah, it's so hard not to strive to be perfect when it seems like everyone around us is more beautiful. But, alas, we all have our own flaws and imperfections(some of us more than others :lol: ) and we're all virtually the same inside! I try to remember that when I'm feeling down on myself.
Hell, I always had a "cocky and arrogant" facade, where I pretended I had a front like "hey, I am more attractive than you..." but my aloofiness was only a shield of my deep insecurities...

whoaaaaaa jenny. you're being abused sexually? as in molestation?

My crappy rant for the night. I'm beginning to think that maybe...this dude...really is as shallow as I pegged him. I mean, okay, he apologized to me for his behavior and said that it was just a huge coincidence that he didn't get online for like, 2 weeks afterward (leading me to think he was ignoring me). Okay, but now, it's like, he'll sign into IM, and then a minute later leave. And we haven't had a fun convo like we used to ever since that incident. What am I supposed to make of that?? Coincidence my ass. I was insulted about his always talking about wanting to sleep with me and now he's not talking. Sure, he's in grad school, so he could be busy, but nah. It's not that simple and easy. It never is. It's always something I did. I can't pick decent guys to fall for and I can't say anything right. And apparently no one likes me when they get to know the real me.

Of course, my so-called problem looks pretty stupid compared to a lot of you, so I should just stop bitching. It sounds shallow anyway.

If I just wasn't mortified of being alone.

My crappy rant for the night. I'm beginning to think that maybe...this dude...really is as shallow as I pegged him. I mean, okay, he apologized to me for his behavior and said that it was just a huge coincidence that he didn't get online for like, 2 weeks afterward (leading me to think he was ignoring me). Okay, but now, it's like, he'll sign into IM, and then a minute later leave. And we haven't had a fun convo like we used to ever since that incident. What am I supposed to make of that?? Coincidence my ass. I was insulted about his always talking about wanting to sleep with me and now he's not talking. Sure, he's in grad school, so he could be busy, but nah. It's not that simple and easy. It never is. It's always something I did. I can't pick decent guys to fall for and I can't say anything right. And apparently no one likes me when they get to know the real me.

Of course, my so-called problem looks pretty stupid compared to a lot of you, so I should just stop bitching. It sounds shallow anyway.

If I just wasn't mortified of being alone.A problem is a problem, no matter how big or small. What matters is how it makes the person [who's suffering] feel inside. As for that dude, why don't you ask him what's causing him to be this way? Instead of bluntly laying the blame on yourself? It's NOT always something you did.

Hehehe, I had braces too and those dentists know a lot of things.....those sneaky bastards ;)

It sounds like a lot of your frustration is from your father...man, I feel like I'm talking to my twin here :lol: I have problems with my dad too but we're just not close. I feel bad that your dad abuses you like that :( How horrible. Considering what you've been through, I can understand how you'd have issues with your weight-- your dad never really made you feel comfortable with yourself and you don't appear to be getting support from the mom. And you're right- I think there's this stigma for being overweight. Like we can't be beautiful or anything :rolleyes: It's hard to love ourselves when we're constantly being thought of as worthless, isn't it?Yep, and me, like the dentist, will be a sneaky bastard when it comes to my ED, too. :D Can you believe NO ONE has suspected anything? No one even mentioned my weight gain!!! Well, except for my parents. Ha, in which they will make fun of me! (25 lbs in less than a year, btw). And when I told my teacher, she had such a hard time believing me, too. I suppose fat is just associated with glutton. :rolleyes: Terrible misconception in that you have to be 70 pounds to have an eating disorder! :mad: And um.. I'm not overweight..... yet. If I dont stop sooner or later, I will be.. :(

Wow I'm late to this thread.

Anyway, my mother and sister will be out of town this weekend. I get the house to myself, because my father is never home anyway. I love being alone at my house, but then I think of my father always out and stuff, it makes me so mad... angry, pissed, evrything. I wish he could just stay home with his family for once. ONCE.

My crappy rant for the night. I'm beginning to think that maybe...this dude...really is as shallow as I pegged him. I mean, okay, he apologized to me for his behavior and said that it was just a huge coincidence that he didn't get online for like, 2 weeks afterward (leading me to think he was ignoring me). Okay, but now, it's like, he'll sign into IM, and then a minute later leave. And we haven't had a fun convo like we used to ever since that incident. What am I supposed to make of that?? Coincidence my ass. I was insulted about his always talking about wanting to sleep with me and now he's not talking. Sure, he's in grad school, so he could be busy, but nah. It's not that simple and easy. It never is. It's always something I did. I can't pick decent guys to fall for and I can't say anything right. And apparently no one likes me when they get to know the real me.

Of course, my so-called problem looks pretty stupid compared to a lot of you, so I should just stop bitching. It sounds shallow anyway.

If I just wasn't mortified of being alone.
You are not being shallow; he sounds like an ass, move on...I am like you that I always fall for the ******* jerks who are not worth ****! Move on sweety...

A problem is a problem, no matter how big or small. What matters is how it makes the person [who's suffering] feel inside. As for that dude, why don't you ask him what's causing him to be this way? Instead of bluntly laying the blame on yourself? It's NOT always something you did.

Yeah, I guess you're right. And it makes me feel rotten. But it's like, dang, will that girl ever stop bitching about boys?! There's a war going on and starving people in Africa and homeless people and teen suicides...etc. My feeling like a loser date-wise seems pretty insignificant and dumb.

I should, but I'm too shy and scared. I mean,. I kind of did that once and that's what started this whole thing, so I'm gun shy I suppose.

Wow I'm late to this thread.

Anyway, my mother and sister will be out of town this weekend. I get the house to myself, because my father is never home anyway. I love being alone at my house, but then I think of my father always out and stuff, it makes me so mad... angry, pissed, evrything. I wish he could just stay home with his family for once. ONCE.

:( My dad is a hermit. On his days off, unless he has to buy something or he takes my mom to lunch, he stays inside all day watching TV and doing crossword puzzles. Better than going out drinking or whatever I guess.

You are not being shallow; he sounds like an ass, move on...I am like you that I always fall for the ******* jerks who are not worth ****! Move on sweety...

Oh hun, I wish it were that simple. :) I still have a crush on this dude I liked in HS and I haven't seen him in 6 years! I don't seem to let things go very well.

Oh hun, I wish it were that simple. :) I still have a crush on this dude I liked in HS and I haven't seen him in 6 years! I don't seem to let things go very well.
I know it is not simple for just walking away...I am in the same situation I just found out that this ******* whom I am in love with is engaged to marry the ****ing daughter of Pete Townshend of the Who..****, when it comes to love I have zero luck in... :(

I know it is not simple for just walking away...I am in the same situation I just found out that this ******* whom I am in love with is engaged to marry the ****ing daughter of Pete Townshend of the Who..****, when it comes to love I have zero luck in... :(
:( Sound like my luck. Well, without the fame part. :lol:

This guy is a total ***** and so opposite from me. He smokes, drinks, bar hops, etc. I do none of that. But he was always funny and made me laugh and was nice to me, so *crush*. Ugh.

.

I was insulted about his always talking about wanting to sleep with me

I don't want to sound like some sex crazed pervert here (which I think you know I'm not, I hope :) ) but isn't the fact that he was talking about wanting to sleep with you a good thing?

I don't want to sound like some sex crazed pervert here (which I think you know I'm not, I hope :) ) but isn't the fact that he was talking about wanting to sleep with you a good thing?
Uh...hmm. Lemme think about this. :lol:

I suppose it's a split decision.

I don't want to sound like some sex crazed pervert here (which I think you know I'm not, I hope :) ) but isn't the fact that he was talking about wanting to sleep with you a good thing?

Well not if he's only after just getting some ass :crazy:

Well not if he's only after just getting some ass :crazy:

That's true.

I really sincerely feel like an ******* everytime I open my mouth to talk to someone. I think that's how I aquired my social anxiety. I can't ever see myself as a good person.

I really sincerely feel like an ******* everytime I open my mouth to talk to someone. I think that's how I aquired my social anxiety. I can't ever see myself as a good person.
i feel exactly the same way. i feel like i'm habitually being a bitch all the time over little things like misunderstandings. and ESPECIALLY when i reject someone for ANYTHING like if they ask me if i want some of their chips. i absolutely hate it when people invite me over to their houses because I CAN'T STAND BEING AT SOMEONE ELSE'S HOUSE OR HAVING THEM COME HERE. and of course i can't say no. i can't ever make my own decisions.

:( Sound like my luck. Well, without the fame part. :lol:

This guy is a total ***** and so opposite from me. He smokes, drinks, bar hops, etc. I do none of that. But he was always funny and made me laugh and was nice to me, so *crush*. Ugh.
**** girl we had a lot in common, mine smokes as well..and he is an arrogant son of a bitch because he is in a ****ing band (big deal)...I have been cursed since I was in my 20s for only falling in love with Musicians!!! Actually the first thing I do when I check a band is to see if there is any members are cute :rolleyes: (which is pathetic)

i feel exactly the same way. i feel like i'm habitually being a bitch all the time over little things like misunderstandings. and ESPECIALLY when i reject someone for ANYTHING like if they ask me if i want some of their chips. i absolutely hate it when people invite me over to their houses because I CAN'T STAND BEING AT SOMEONE ELSE'S HOUSE OR HAVING THEM COME HERE. and of course i can't say no. i can't ever make my own decisions.If I say no to that stuff I hate myself for not TRYING to make friends...and I often do say no. I'm a sarcastic, too. I'm constantly joking around with people, and teasing them in the most innocent way. I can see why people would take it as mean. To top that off, when people do it back to me I get mad because I'm a ****ing sensative *****. Like today, my two friends were making fun of my shirt or some ****...all in good fun and I'm all yeah, **** you guys. I'm such a bitch. I can understand why people hate me.

Well not if he's only after just getting some ass :crazy:

:yeahthat

I was cursed with always finding friends whom I never know if they're joking or being serious.

I really sincerely feel like an ******* everytime I open my mouth to talk to someone. I think that's how I aquired my social anxiety. I can't ever see myself as a good person.

I hear that. I seem to manage saying or doing the bitchiest or snottiest thing possible very well. Especially around guys.

**** girl we had a lot in common, mine smokes as well..and he is an arrogant son of a bitch because he is in a ****ing band (big deal)...I have been cursed since I was in my 20s for only falling in love with Musicians!!! Actually the first thing I do when I check a band is to see if there is any members are cute :rolleyes: (which is pathetic)

Mine's just arrogant cuz he's a guy. :lol: I seem to fall for the class clown a lot. :crazy: Then you realize he's a jerk. ohno: In HS, it was always the pretty boys who were in choir or band.

I CAN'T STAND BEING AT SOMEONE ELSE'S HOUSE OR HAVING THEM COME HERE.

Me too! I hate people in my house looking at my stuff. And I never feel comfy in other people's houses around their family. Just....ugh. No way.

Me too! I hate people in my house looking at my stuff. And I never feel comfy in other people's houses around their family. Just....ugh. No way.
Especially when one of your friend's brother is the senior valedictorian and gives you this "holier than thou" sense about him. I'm terrified of her house. Geniuses.

Just my opinion:
I don't think this thread is a good idea...by reading other's negative feelings and views really can hinder and worsen one's emotional state. I really think that everyone currently dealing with depression of any sort really needs to check out cognitive optimism...I really am a big fan of the technique and think that it can be applied and manipulated to help many people in drasticaly different situations.

Especially when one of your friend's brother is the senior valedictorian and gives you this "holier than thou" sense about him. I'm terrified of her house. Geniuses.

I really do hate people like that. Especially if they have zero common sense, and yet they still think they're all that.

Just my opinion:
I don't think this thread is a good idea...by reading other's negative feelings and views really can hinder and worsen one's emotional state. I really think that everyone currently dealing with depression of any sort really needs to check out cognitive optimism...I really am a big fan of the technique and think that it can be applied and manipulated to help many people in drasticaly different situations.

K...explain what cognitive optimism is.

Mine's just arrogant cuz he's a guy. :lol: I seem to fall for the class clown a lot. :crazy: Then you realize he's a jerk. ohno: In HS, it was always the pretty boys who were in choir or band.

Hey, I was in band. :lol:

Hey, I was in band. :lol:

:D I had a thing (or have, whatever) for guys who were musically talented.

Just my opinion:
I don't think this thread is a good idea...by reading other's negative feelings and views really can hinder and worsen one's emotional state. I really think that everyone currently dealing with depression of any sort really needs to check out cognitive optimism...I really am a big fan of the technique and think that it can be applied and manipulated to help many people in drasticaly different situations.

I see what you mean, and I agree, but I also think that reading about other people who have just as bad a problem as you do, or in some cases, even worse, may have the effect of cheering somebody up. I do see how it could have the opposite effect, and end up making them feel worse, but sometimes seeing that people have similar probkems to you can make you feel better - make you feel as though you're not alone, and can relate to them - or, if the problems are worse than yours, it can maybe put things into perspective. But it could work both ways; I supposed it depends on what kind of person you are.

I see what you mean, and I agree, but I also think that reading about other people who have just as bad a problem as you do, or in some cases, even worse, may have the effect of cheering somebody up. I do see how it could have the opposite effect, and end of making them feel worse, but sometimes seeing that people have similar probkems to you can make you feel better - make you feel as though you're not alone, and can relate to them - or, if the problems are worse than yours, it can maybe put things into perspective. But it could work both ways; I supposed it depends on what kind of person you are.

I agree.

I mean, no one here is a licensed psychologist; we're just a friend to lean on. And I think talking about things helps. Especially if you find someone who has had a similar experience.

I agree.

I mean, no one here is a licensed psychologist; we're just a friend to lean on. And I think talking about things helps. Especially if you find someone who has had a similar experience.

I am a licensed psychologist!

Just joking. :) It's a shame the Frasier Crane radio show isn't real; we could all call in.

:lol: That would be cool.

Me too! I hate people in my house looking at my stuff. And I never feel comfy in other people's houses around their family. Just....ugh. No way.
omg, i know. at 10 or 11 i really wanted friends and was excited to have someone at my house or vice versa, but i found that i always looked forward to them going home and going back to having time to myself. and being at someone else's house is so uncomfortable and i can never wait to go home.

omg, i know. at 10 or 11 i really wanted friends and was excited to have someone at my house or vice versa, but i found that i always looked forward to them going home and going back to having time to myself. and being at someone else's house is so uncomfortable and i can never wait to go home.

exactly. It's like, go away so I can watch TV without you being here. And stop talking.

Just my opinion:
I don't think this thread is a good idea...by reading other's negative feelings and views really can hinder and worsen one's emotional state. I really think that everyone currently dealing with depression of any sort really needs to check out cognitive optimism...I really am a big fan of the technique and think that it can be applied and manipulated to help many people in drasticaly different situations.
I've tried to be optimistic, I'm just always let down. I've tried to be more talkative, I'm told I'm annoying. If I act like you, no offense really I know what you're trying to do, I'd feel even worse about myself...trying to act better when I know deep down I'm not. I hate myself with an extreme passion. I don't know what to do, but talking about it does make me feel a little better, not storing it inside so it can spring on you some day later on.

I think this thread is a good idea for those who want talk about their problems.Sometimes no one will listen and you need somebody who will.
That's why I come to SO. Everyone has been so understanding.Meanwhile
I try to stay positive about everything even though I'm so upset.
Oh well maybe if I get some sleep I feel better in the morning. :( :sleep: :)

My thinking on "being positive." I've tried it in many situations, but I always find myself thinking this: "How can anyone think this way? It's not logical and makes no sense." Many times I just don't understand how someone could be positive. Something bad could happen, so let's be really upbeat about it and when things don't go my way, I'll be totally devistated. Smiles!

I wish I could express myself more. It feels like almost every decision I made I didn't make on my own. It feels like people are gonna push me around for the rest of my life. It's because I'm so goddamn sensative and afraid people are going to abandon me and I'm going to end up lonely if I actually stick up for myself for once.

My thinking on "being positive." I've tried it in many situations, but I always find myself thinking this: "How can anyone think this way? It's not logical and makes no sense." Many times I just don't understand how someone could be positive. Something bad could happen, so let's be really upbeat about it and when things don't go my way, I'll be totally devistated. Smiles!
I tried to think "positive" too and I know better...When something is too good to be true..guesst what it is...

I'm a psychology major so this should be up my alley :)
Great! It's good to know. Even if I'm not too much of a regular on these threads, I hope I can join in on advice-seeking. ;)

Anyone else Sociology majors, btw?

I feel ****ing cursed, first without sounding like a pompous ass..I happen to be an attractive person..I am physically fit, have long hair, good skin and the boobs, but I cannot find a ****ing man. First I am ****ing picky..I mean I am very very very very very very very selective and picky when it comes to men and having a relationship with them..It sucks..because I am an intelligent, successful, well educated and pretty girl and I do not have a ****ing man in my ****ing life and it sucks!.....(SIGH)...... :(

Lady T: I so hear what you mean. I feel I am also very picky when it comes to weeding out what I want/don't want in a romantic relationship. I'm in my late 20s and really feel like I am nearing my "wanting" to get involved in a romantic relationship. I always thought it would be easy, but it's proving otherwise. By picky, I am feeling like I want this type of relationship to be "perfect," in my eyes. I am afraid to get hurt or to act temperamental against guys. That is my MAJOR flaw about me - my anger. :(

Those Suffering from Social Anxiety: I have read this interesting article that had great points and ways to help be more open towards facing people. I can post it if you are interested. :)

Here's also a great SA forum: http://azure.bbboy.net/sauk if you are interested in learning more.

I am in the same boat as you guys. I'm 25 and have never had a boyfriend. And I am sooooooooo picky! I have no desire to settle for some dude who hands me a pickup line. But this perfect man I've created in my mind probably doesn't even exist. I mean, I'm not fat, but I'm not totally fit and I don't know how pretty I am, but...eh, whatever. It's frustrating. I probably wouldn't worry so much if I weren't so damn scared of being alone in life. And if I didn't think it was such a stigma to be single and 25. That means LOSER in my book and I shouldn't think that way.

Lady T: I so hear what you mean. I feel I am also very picky when it comes to weeding out what I want/don't want in a romantic relationship. I'm in my late 20s and really feel like I am nearing my "wanting" to get involved in a romantic relationship. I always thought it would be easy, but it's proving otherwise. By picky, I am feeling like I want this type of relationship to be "perfect," in my eyes. I am afraid to get hurt or to act temperamental against guys. That is my MAJOR flaw about me - my anger. :(

Those Suffering from Social Anxiety: I have read this interesting article that had great points and ways to help be more open towards facing people. I can post it if you are interested. :)

Here's also a great SA forum: http://azure.bbboy.net/sauk if you are interested in learning more.
For me it is very hard for me to open up emotionally in a relationship. I am 35 years old..and I have been in several long term relationships..I am terribly picky and I do not do relationships very well, at first I thought it was a phase that I would over come by the time I reached my 30s...actually the opposite has happened...I am more selective than ever!
I see these ugly women who have crappy personalities and butts the size of houses and they are married or have someone in their lives..and here I am in great shape, intelligent and attractive and it has been a royal bitch and a half to find anyone decent.

It is really hard for people to open up emotionally.
That is true..but it is also hard for me to get emotionally involved as well.

So, is it hard for you to make any "commitments" in a relationship?
In the long run..yes.

I see these ugly women who have crappy personalities and butts the size of houses and they are married or have someone in their lives..and here I am in great shape, intelligent and attractive and it has been a royal bitch and a half to find anyone decent.

I know that! I just keep telling myself, I wouldn't the guy they got anyway. And most of the time it's true. Let them take the ugly ones. :)

It is really hard for people to open up emotionally.

Especially when you're afraid of being made fun of.

Dawson's Girl & Lady T: I hear you. I am a little older than you, and I still don't have that experience either. *blush, blush* Only until last summer did I feel like I wanted to pursue looking into dating. I remember back in late 2002 there was this student who said he liked me, but I thought he was a little too older for me and turned him down. I felt a bit creeped out at that time, but when last summer rolled around towards this guy I'd been eye-ing, I just fell ga-ga over him. I tend to fall for someone who appears quiet and shy, I guess. Like this current crush that's happening with me proves it once again. :(

I think I am afraid to wait for someone to come to me because I am quite picky in what I want, but if I see/observe guys who I tend to see around, I am more inclined to fall in love with "wanting" to get to know them as a potential date. I don't know. I'm getting sick of being single all of a sudden because of my age (didn't bother me for the longest time!), yet I won't just date anyone. I feel I have to see them for a bit to observe habits and then go up to chit-chat to get to know them. I don't know. It's all too confusing.

Sometimes I feel like I have a bit of social anxiety. Although, it's not with an entire crowd of people but more like individuals I want to impress (whether for friendship, flirting, or just family/friends). It feels quite nerve-wrecking.

I know half of what's going on with this guy I have a crush on is the "In love with being in love" thing. The whole prospect that there might be something in this has me picking out china patterns. :lol: Not literally, but you get my drift.

But yeah, I'm getting antsy because of my age, which at 25, is silly.

But I'm so afraid to open up to people, that it'll take a saint to reel me in.

I can't stand this not knowing what the hell is going on in that jerk's feeble little mind. Are you ignoring me or are you busy? And if you're busy...DON'T ****ING SIGN INTO IM!!!


My latest thing to be pissy over: I think I look like I put on 20 pounds overnight. It's depressing.

What I can't understand right now is why alot of my family members are
getting into drugs.Maybe I shouldn't worry about it but I still do.Some
of those relatives used to the best people to talk too and share good
times with. Now I never see them and I miss them but I know that they
probably are too involved in committing criminal activity and not caring
one less about the family or anything else.I wish they could turn
their lives around for all of us.I hope someday they'll realize their mistake :(

Dawson's Girl: Yeah, that's true....my crush....I'm sooo scared to approach him! I have briefly last Friday to begin a convo, but he wasn't too respondent, so I got spooked off and felt it was like a sign to "back off." It's all too confusing.... :( I *should* see him today - if he shows up because he's been skipping his T/Th Illustrator class. If not, then most definitely on Friday. Have you ever had the feeling of WANTING to approach a crush but at that same moment you're scared of his rejection or possibly not being liked. I keep thinking he could be my first date - hopefully. *embarrassed look* But too much dreaming on my behalf - what if he's not interested in me?? It's scary! I've had the luck of actually asking my last crush out in July 2004, but he turned me down because he was gay. He was really nice about it too and very touched. Let me know how your crush is going.... Wish ya luck! :)

If anyone also has any advice on something else - I have this acquiantance I'd wish to become a friend. Everything was going okay with correspondence in the beginning, but since we didn't see each other too much, he just doesn't respond to personal-type emails. Not hearing/seeing him in person since early January wanted me to visit him, and then his freakin' job goes out of business so he's outta there! *argh* I had a dream last night I finally saw him, and he was purposely avoiding me - NOT a cool dream. *sniff* :( Any advice/suggestions on this one?

Have you ever had the feeling of WANTING to approach a crush but at that same moment you're scared of his rejection or possibly not being liked.

YES! It's like the two halves of you are fighting each other. Terrible confusion.