View Full Version : 88 ways to know whether you are Chinese


Sargent Stewie
01-16-2005, 04:51 PM
88 Ways to Know Whether You Are Chinese My responses are between the ()
1. You look like you are 18. (lol, yea right)
2. You like to eat chicken feet. (yeah!!!)

3. You suck on fish heads and fish fins. (My mom does though...ewww
4. You have a Chinese knick-knack hanging on your rear view mirror. (yea)

5. You sing Karaoke. (never)
6. Your house is covered with tile. (nope)
7. Your kitchen is covered by a sticky film of grease. (no)
8. Your stove is covered with aluminum foil. (no)
9. You leave the plastic covers on your remote control. (my grandma does...)
10. You've never kissed your mom or dad. (tru)
11. You've never hugged your mom or dad. (tru)
12. Your unassisted vision is worse than 20/500. (wha?)
13. You wear contacts, to avoid wearing your "coke bottle glasses". (no)
14. You've worn glasses since you were in fifth grade. (i don't wear glasses)
15. Your hair sticks up when you wake up. (my hair always sticks up...)
16. You'll haggle over something that is not negotiable. (yep)
17. You love to use coupons. (nope)
18. You drive around looking for the cheapest petrol. (whats a petrol?)
19. You drive around for hours looking for the best parking space. (my mom does)
20. You take showers at night. (yep yep)
21. You avoid the non-free snacks in hotel rooms. (yeah, they really get you with the paying ones)
22. You don't mind squeezing 20 people into one motel room. (well it depends, :winkey:
23. Most girls have more body hair than you, if you are male. (yeah, whatever
24. You tap the table when someone pours tea for you. (yes)

25. You say "Aiya!" and "Wah!" frequently. (only aie ya)
26. You don't want to wear your seatbelt because it is uncomfortable. (no, that's plain stoopid)
27. You love Las Vegas, slot machines, and blackjack. (if i could gamble...) 28. You unwrap Christmas gifts very carefully, so you can reuse the paper. (no)
29. You only buy Christmas cards after Christmas, when they are 50% off. (not me)
30. You have a vinyl tablecloth on your kitchen table. (nope...)
31. You spit bones and other food scraps on the table. (My mom does

32. You have stuff in the freezer since the beginning of time. (i don't even wanna look in there)
33. You use the dishwasher as a dish rack. (who doesn't?)

34. You have never used your dishwasher. (my mom does once a while)
35. You keep a Thermos of hot water available at all times. (wha?)
36. You eat all meals in the kitchen. (i guess u can say dat...)
37. You save grocery bags, tin foil, and tin containers. (no)
38. You have a piano in your living room (nope nope)
39. You pick your teeth at the dinner table (i use toothpicks)
40. You twirl your pen around your fingers. (hehe)
41. You hate to waste food. (yep)
42. You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one leftover chicken wing. (around 1 plate)
43. You don't own any real Tupperware - only a cupboard full of used but carefully rinsed margarine tubs, takeout containers, and jam jars. (ummm, what?)
44. You also use the jam jars as drinking glasses. (what is a jam jar?)
45. You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottles that you take every time you stay in a hotel. (no, how chinkey though)

46. You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel (travel means any car ride longer than 15 minutes). These snacks are always dried and include dried plums, mango, ginger, and squid. (fruits)
47. You wash your rice at least 2-3 times before cooking it. (who wants to eat drrrrty rice?)
48. Your dad thinks he can fix everything himself. (dunno)
49. The dashboard of your Honda is covered by hundreds of small toys. (shutup! hehe)
50. You don't use measuring cups. (yea, for rice)
51. You beat eggs with chopsticks. (wha?)
52. You have a teacup with a cover on it. (no)
53. You always look phone numbers up in the phone book, since calling information costs 50 cents. (i only did it 3 times cuz i was lazy)

54. You only make long distance calls after 11pm. (actaully, after 7 pm )
55. If you are male, you clap at something funny and if you are female, you giggle whilst placing a hand over your mouth. (I agree on the boy thing)
56. You like Chinese films in their original undubbed versions. (of course)
57. You love Chinese Martial Arts films. (right again!)
58. You've learnt some form of martial arts. (no, i'm too lazy for that discipline crap)
59. Shaolin actually means something to you. (Shaolin Soccer? LOL)
60. You like congee with thousand-year-old eggs. (whatcha talkin bout? those eggs with black spots on em?
62. You never call your parents just to say hi. (why would i?)
63. If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight. (I guess,)

65. You know what yeet hay is. (not in that dialect)
66. You e-mail your Chinese friends at work, even though you only 10 feet apart. [more like instant message, but yah]
67. You use a face cloth. (yup)

68. You starve yourself before going to all you can eat places. (no)
70. You save your old Coke bottle glasses even though you're never going to use them again. (no)
72. Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin. [definitely, i smash them with the side of my toothbrush]
73. You know what moon cakes are. (for the moon festival, duh)

75. Your parents know how to launch nasal projectiles. (umm...ewww)
76. You iron your own shirts.[mom does it for me]
77. You play a musical instrument. (used to)
79. You've eaten a red bean popsicle. (hell no)

81. You fight over who pays the dinner bill. (damn straight, well, at least my aunts and my mom does :P)
83. You live with your parents and you are 30 years old (and they prefer it that way). Or if you're married and 30 years old, you live in the apartment next door to your parents, or at least in the same neighborhood. (neither of the above)
84. You don't tip more than 0% at a restaurant, and if you do, you tip Chinese delivery guys/waiters more. (that's just plain mean, everyone deserves a 14% tip, unless they are a real ass)
85. You have acquired a taste for bitter melon.[uh no]
86. You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last piece of food on the table. (i eat the last everything)
87. You know why there are 88 reasons. (of course, ba ba)
88. You see the truth in this and then send it to all your Chinese friends. (screw u, :P)

Hollow
01-16-2005, 05:24 PM
how about... you have ancestors from china? :grr:

theanswerman
01-16-2005, 05:30 PM
why are the boards so slow?

Chelsea
01-16-2005, 05:45 PM
I'm holding out for a pay raise (up from the current $0.00...I'm looking for a 50% increase), and am making the site slow on purpose.

Seriously, I don't know. The load on the server appears normal...Really not sure what it could be.

The pay raise thing's a joke. 50% increase from nothing's still nothing kids...

vienna waits
01-16-2005, 06:14 PM
lol @ the karaoke thing. Jasmine's family (though they were philipino.. still Asian) threw that big karaoke party for her when she made it into the top 12.

Warm & Fuzzy
01-16-2005, 08:15 PM
1. You look like you are 18. (Nah, I'm still 16, hehe.)
2. You like to eat chicken feet. (Yeppers.)

3. You suck on fish heads and fish fins. (My grandpa, LOL.)
4. You have a Chinese knick-knack hanging on your rear view mirror. (Nope, no private car.)
5. You sing Karaoke. (Yep)
6. Your house is covered with tile. (Yep)
7. Your kitchen is covered by a sticky film of grease. (haha yeah)
8. Your stove is covered with aluminum foil. (yep)
9. You leave the plastic covers on your remote control. (grandparents)
10. You've never kissed your mom or dad. (yep)
11. You've never hugged your mom or dad. (yep)
12. Your unassisted vision is worse than 20/500. (something like that LOL)
13. You wear contacts, to avoid wearing your "coke bottle glasses". (no)
14. You've worn glasses since you were in fifth grade. (nope)
15. Your hair sticks up when you wake up. (nah. my hair's fine.
16. You'll haggle over something that is not negotiable. (say what??)
17. You love to use coupons. (hehe cheap is my middle name!)
18. You drive around looking for the cheapest petrol. (whats a petrol?)
19. You drive around for hours looking for the best parking space. (dad. I dont drive.)
20. You take showers at night. (uh huh.)
21. You avoid the non-free snacks in hotel rooms. (LOL hell yeah. Cheap-- like I said.)
22. You don't mind squeezing 20 people into one motel room. (Of course I do, LOL.)
23. Most girls have more body hair than you, if you are male. (No comment. :D)
24. You tap the table when someone pours tea for you. (Nope. But my grandparents do.)
25. You say "Aiya!" and "Wah!" frequently. (both!)
26. You don't want to wear your seatbelt because it is uncomfortable. (Yeah LOL)
27. You love Las Vegas, slot machines, and blackjack. (Nope)
28. You unwrap Christmas gifts very carefully, so you can reuse the paper. (heheheeeeee. yeah. :blush: )
29. You only buy Christmas cards after Christmas, when they are 50% off. (Guilty as charged, LOL... but sometimes I buy them before xmas, as well.)
30. You have a vinyl tablecloth on your kitchen table. (I havent any dinning table??)
31. You spit bones and other food scraps on the table. (Heheeeee...)
32. You have stuff in the freezer since the beginning of time. (LOL probably)
33. You use the dishwasher as a dish rack. (Dont have one)
34. You have never used your dishwasher. (dont have one)
35. You keep a Thermos of hot water available at all times. (Nope. But my grandparents do.)
36. You eat all meals in the kitchen. (Nope)
37. You save grocery bags, tin foil, and tin containers. (yes, LOL)
38. You have a piano in your living room (nope)
39. You pick your teeth at the dinner table (naaah)
40. You twirl your pen around your fingers. (yep)
41. You hate to waste food. (yep)
42. You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one leftover chicken wing. (LOL. Yup)
43. You don't own any real Tupperware - only a cupboard full of used but carefully rinsed margarine tubs, takeout containers, and jam jars. (LOL!!!!! Yes.)
44. You also use the jam jars as drinking glasses. (My grandparents and mother does!)
45. You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottles that you take every time you stay in a hotel. (Yeah, LOL)
46. You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel (travel means any car ride longer than 15 minutes). These snacks are always dried and include dried plums, mango, ginger, and squid. (Yep!)
47. You wash your rice at least 2-3 times before cooking it. (Yep!)
48. Your dad thinks he can fix everything himself. (Nope. He cant fix anything.)
49. The dashboard of your Honda is covered by hundreds of small toys. (No private car.)
50. You don't use measuring cups. (True)
51. You beat eggs with chopsticks. (true)
52. You have a teacup with a cover on it. (yes)
53. You always look phone numbers up in the phone book, since calling information costs 50 cents. (true. I didnt know anyone USED info???)
54. You only make long distance calls after 11pm. (we dont make long distance calls )
55. If you are male, you clap at something funny and if you are female, you giggle whilst placing a hand over your mouth. (True.)
56. You like Chinese films in their original undubbed versions. (Nope. dont watch 'em.)
57. You love Chinese Martial Arts films. (they're okay.)
58. You've learnt some form of martial arts. (no)
59. Shaolin actually means something to you. (Nope??)
60. You like congee with thousand-year-old eggs. (LOVE EM!!!)
62. You never call your parents just to say hi. (true)
63. If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight. (I still live at home)
65. You know what yeet hay is. (of course, LOL!)
66. You e-mail your Chinese friends at work, even though you only 10 feet apart. (unemployed)
67. You use a face cloth. (nope)
68. You starve yourself before going to all you can eat places. (LOL yes.)
70. You save your old Coke bottle glasses even though you're never going to use them again. (yep!)
72. Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin. [YES!!!]
73. You know what moon cakes are. (yep!)
75. Your parents know how to launch nasal projectiles. (LOL!!!! What??)
76. You iron your own shirts.(never iron)
77. You play a musical instrument. (never)
79. You've eaten a red bean popsicle. (LOVE EM!!!)
81. You fight over who pays the dinner bill. (Yep!)
83. You live with your parents and you are 30 years old (and they prefer it that way). Or if you're married and 30 years old, you live in the apartment next door to your parents, or at least in the same neighborhood. (My grandparents live a block away from my parents.)
84. You don't tip more than 0% at a restaurant, and if you do, you tip Chinese delivery guys/waiters more. (Always ALWAYS tip)
85. You have acquired a taste for bitter melon.(What are those?)
86. You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last piece of food on the table. (I dont eat rice unless it's fried, or w/ sushi... in which case, yea, I eat every last grain, LOL.)
87. You know why there are 88 reasons. (LOL yep.)
88. You see the truth in this and then send it to all your Chinese friends. (Later I might. :D)

dawsongirl
01-17-2005, 02:24 AM
88 Ways to Know Whether You Are Chinese
1. You look like you are 18.


Dude! I'm Chinese! :crazy:

Sargent Stewie
01-17-2005, 02:33 AM
Dude! I'm Chinese! :crazy:


OMG, so am I. :)

dawsongirl
01-17-2005, 03:06 AM
OMG, so am I. :)

I'm the whitest white girl in the world, I just look like I'm 18, so I said I was Chinese.

Hollow
01-17-2005, 03:50 AM
1. You look like you are 18.
5. You sing Karaoke.
17. You love to use coupons.
26. You don't want to wear your seatbelt because it is uncomfortable.
27. You love Las Vegas, slot machines, and blackjack.
36. You eat all meals in the kitchen.
37. You save grocery bags, tin foil, and tin containers.
40. You twirl your pen around your fingers.
53. You always look phone numbers up in the phone book, since calling information costs 50 cents.
62. You never call your parents just to say hi.
72. Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin. [definitely, i smash them with the side of my toothbrush]
85. You have acquired a taste for bitter melon.[uh no]
86. You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last piece of food on the table.

YAAAAAY im chinese:grr:

dawsongirl
01-17-2005, 04:03 AM
btw, petrol is gasoline.

and coupons rule.

Warm & Fuzzy
01-17-2005, 10:02 PM
I'm the whitest white girl in the world, I just look like I'm 18, so I said I was Chinese.:rotflmao: HAHAAAAAAAA...

But uh, I'm Chinese! No, really, LOL.

Sargent Stewie
01-17-2005, 11:22 PM
:rotflmao: HAHAAAAAAAA...

But uh, I'm Chinese! No, really, LOL.



So Am I. :)

Warm & Fuzzy
01-18-2005, 12:07 AM
So Am I. :)Which dialect do you speak, if any?

Dude111
10-28-2022, 12:07 AM
The only ones that apply to me are 14,15 and sometimes 16...