Warm & Fuzzy
01-01-2002, 01:43 AM
LOL! I remember hearing this joke from my cousins..hahaha! :lol:
XoVanillaRain90oX
01-01-2002, 11:32 AM
:lol:!!!!
I gotsa joke, I wanna say it!!
"Oh am I supposed to say something funny?..SOMETHING FUNNY!" lol o0o0o0o0o0ok.
-*Forever*-
01-01-2002, 12:28 PM
Originally posted by Division_Fan_Lisa
:lol:!!!!
I gotsa joke, I wanna say it!!
"Oh am I supposed to say something funny?..SOMETHING FUNNY!" lol o0o0o0o0o0ok.
hahahahaha Our Lips Are Sealed! I've got one from dat movie:
"Why did the crocodile cross the road? Like I care!"
XoVanillaRain90oX
01-01-2002, 12:38 PM
Originally posted by Patricia Heaton Forever
hahahahaha Our Lips Are Sealed! I've got one from dat movie:
"Why did the crocodile cross the road? Like I care!"
LOL! Yup!! hehe :crazy:
Babes_Cat
01-01-2002, 01:03 PM
Oh Man I got tons of jokes.... On my homepage... here they are... lol....
JoKeS!
A Book Never Written:
"Let's Do It" By Ira Fuse.
One day this duck walks into a connivance store and asks the guy at the counter, "Got any gwapes?"
The man replies, "No, we don't have any gwapes" So the duck leaves.
The next day the same duck walks into the store and asks the guy at the counter, "Got any gwapes?"
"No," is the mans reply once again. So then the duck leaves.
The next day the duck comes in and asks the man, "Got any gwapes?"
"NO!," the man yells. "Now, if you come back one more time I'll staple your feet to the floor!" So the duck leaves.....
But the next day, the duck comes back. "Got any staples?" he asks me man.
"No, we don't have staples," says the man.
"Good," says the duck, "Got any gwapes?"
There was once this man who found magic lamp and in the lamp there was a genie. The genie said that he would grant the man the one thing that is heart desired the most. "I want to be the smartest living creature in the world!"
"Happy to oblige," the genie said. And with a wave of his hand the genie turned the man into the smartest creature in the world. The man looked in a mirror and gasped, for the genie had turned him into a women.
One day a policeman catches a man speeding so he took a picture of his license plate.
The next day, the man received a ticket and a photograph of his license plate in the mail. So he sent the police a photo of the money he was supposed to pay for his fine.
Two days later, the man received a picture of a pair of handcuffs.
Doctor: I have some good news and some bad news for you.
Patient: Tell me the good news first.
Doctor: You have 24 hours to live.
Patient: But that's horrible! What could be worse than that?
Doctor: Well, I've been trying to reach you since yesterday.
A blonde called the fire department because her house was on fire.
"How do we get there?" the fireman asked on the phone.
"DUH! The red truck!" answered the blonde.
A man answers a knock @ the door. But when he opens the door all he sees is a snail on his doorstep, so he throws the snail back into the grass.
Four years later, the man answers the door and sees the same snail there. The snail looks @ him and says, "What'd you do that for?"
A girl was crying while digging a hole in her back yard. Her neighbor asked what was wrong.
"My goldfish died," the girl replied.
"So why dig such a big hole for such a small goldfish?" the neighbor asked.
The girl sobbed, "It's in your cat!"
Three men were on a deserted island and they found a magic lamp. The genie inside the lamp granted each man one wish. The first man wished for a helicopter and then he flew away. The second man wished for a boat and then sailed away. The third man was lonely so he wished for his friends to come back.
Son: Dear God, please bless my mother and father and please make Montreal the capital of Canada.
Mother: Why do you want Montreal to be the capital of Canada?
Son: 'Cuz that's what I put for an answer on my test!
Sam played the piano for his friend Paul. "Well, how was I?" Sam asked.
"You should be on the radio," Paul replied.
"You mean I'm that good?" Sam exclaimed.
"No," Paul said, "I mean that if you were on the radio, I could turn you off."
Three guys stranded on an island found a magic lamp. The genie inside said that he would grant each guy one wish. The first guy said, "I want to be 25% smarter." So he swam off.
The second guys said, "I want to be 50% smarter." So he made a raft and paddled off.
The third guy said, "I want to be 100% smarter," So he walked across the bridge.
Billie: What do you call a sorry spaceship?
Willie: What?
Billie: Apollo G.
Dexter: What do you get when you cross your right eye with your left eye?
Dee Dee: What?
Dexter: Dizzy!
Alex: What was Christopher Columbus considered a bad guy?
Andy: Why?
Alex: Because he double-crossed the Atlantic Ocean.
:Camp Note From Son to Parents:
Dear Mom and Dad,
Gue$$ what I need? Plea$e $end $ome $oon.
Love your $on,
$ammy.
:Home Note From Parents to Son:
Dear Sammy,
NOthing new here. Please send aNOther NOte soon. Bye for NOw.
Love,
Mom and Dad.
Two muffins were baking in an oven one said "AAHH were going to be baked alive!" And the other one said "AAHH a muffin is talking!"
Teacher: If you had 50 cents and you asked your father for another 50 cents, how much money would you have?
Student: 50 cents.
Teacher: You obviously don't know how to add.
Student: You obviously don't know my father.
Mom: What was that crash?
Billy: You remember that vase you worried that I'd break?
Mom: Yes, I remember.
Billy: Well, your worries are over.
Bill: What do you get when you cross a pit bull and a collie?
Phil: What?
Bill: A dog that bites you and then runs for help.
A man driving down a deserted road sees a police man and desides to try to out run it but then he realizes that that would be a stupid idea so he pulls over. The police man gets out of the car comes up to this man and says, "OK, I'm at the end of my shift and if you can come up with a stoy I haven't heared I'll let you go."
So the man says, "About a week ago my wife ran off with a police man and I thought you were trying to give her back."
The police man then says, "OK, you can go and have a nice day."
Mike: A woman had four husbands in her lifetime. The First was a millionaire, the Second was a magician, the Third was a preacher and the Fourth was an undertaker. Why did she marry them all?
Ike: Why?
Mike: One for the money, Two for the show, Three to get ready and Four to go!
(Call me crazy forhaving so many!)
DarleneIllyria
01-01-2002, 08:44 PM
Roflmao at that first joke. lol
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