''70's Show,' 'Undeclared' Creators Trade Bitter E-mail [Archive] - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Brad

12-27-2001, 03:35 AM

Brazill is an enraged, bitter **** who has a chip on his shoulder the size of Texas. Here's the exchange:

>*********************************
>Mark,
>
>I am writing you because I left a message but did not hear back. I
>understand from Gail Berman that you were upset about me not calling you to
>ask if Topher could do our show. Since Fox executives were talking to
>Topher about it I thought it was cool with you. Also, since I hadn't
>written it yet, I wasn't at the point of asking if it was possible to have
>him do it. I would have called your show then. I mentioned the names of
>several people who were interested in doing cameos on our show to the
>Variety guy. They decided to only mention Topher. Maybe I shouldn't have
>mentioned it. I didn't realize it would create a problem. I never wished
>to offend you. If there is some protocol to people on Fox doing guest shots
>on other Fox shows, I didn't know what it was. Regardless, I'm sorry that
>this resulted in such a mess. If you are mad at me about this or something
>else from our past, please tell me. I only remember us having fun in the
>early nineties and it troubles me that it seems like you have a beef with
>me.
>Best regards,
>Judd Apatow
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>--------------------------------
>Judd,
>
>Yeah, we were friends in the early nineties. And if you don't recall what
>happened, I'll remind you. I had a pilot at MTV called "Yard Dogs" about a
>rock band living in Hollywood. I told you about it and you proceeded to
>completely rip it off, storyline and all, for the Ben Stiller show. You
>called it "Grungies." MTV and UTA were working on an overall deal (MTV's
>idea) with me, based on that pilot. When it turned up on your show
>everything went away overnight. I had just had my son Jack and I had no
>job, no money, nothing. There's a saying, "I forgive but I don't forget.
>And I don't forgive." So, now you know. Although I kind of think that you
>already did.
>-Mark
>
>------------------------------------------------------------
>
>Mark,
>I truly don't remember anything you are talking about. Jeff Kahn wrote The
>Grungies sketch, a parody where we did Seattle bands as The Monkey's. I
>don't remember you ever calling me after that saying you were mad. Ben and
>I would get fifty sketches a week from the writers and then we'd pick the
>one's that we thought were funny. I never connected the two. Even now they
>don't seem similar. Ours was a goofy over the top parody, not a situation
>comedy about musicians in LA. Nobody watched our show so I don't see how
>that could be the reason your pilot died. That sketch aired once up against
>60 Minutes, so it didn't have any impact in town. I am sorry you are upset.
>I am not a thief of ideas. I'm sorry you believe differently.
>Judd Apatow
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>--------------------------------
>Judd,
>The show I wrote was also over the top and it let down the fourth wall.
>Since it's registered at the WGA, you could compare the two. And as an Exec
>Producer, we both know you have input into every sketch. As for no one
>seeing the show everyone knows everything in Hollywood. There are no
>secrets. Personally, I feel you've made a career out of being a sycophant
to
>Carrey or Shandling or Roseanne and when you weren't kissing ass, you were
>stealing from lesser known comics or leeching off other people's ideas
>(Celtic Pride, Cable Guy). I noticed how outraged you were to not get a
>writing credit on Cable Guy until it came out and was panned. You dropped
>that cause like the showbiz weasel you are. You may not think you're a
thief
>but most comics know otherwise. And again, you know that too. Have you ever
>read "What Makes Sammy Run"? I think you'd like it. Get cancer.
>Love,
>Mark
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>-------------------------------
>Mark,
>Come on, we all wrote for comics at the beginning of our careers. I wrote
>for Roseanne, you wrote for Dennis Miller. If that makes me a sycophant,
>then I guess I am. And so are the writers for Caesar's Hour. I dropped my
>Cable Guy law suit not because the film got bad reviews, but because I
spent
>eighty grand on it and my lawyer told me I was going to lose. You would be
>upset if you re-wrote the vast majority of a script and received no credit.
>I wish you had called me about this years ago. I'm sure we could have
>worked it out. Try not to be so angry. Not everyone is as bad as you
>think. You should call Jeff Kahn and ask him how that sketch originated.
>If it turned out that I didn't steal your idea would you still want me to
>get cancer? I swear to God that I didn't know you were mad about this.
>Until six weeks ago I was still referring to you as an old friend. Maybe
>one day I'll be able to say that again.
>Judd Apatow
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>--------------------------------
>
>Mark,
> It's come to my attention that you are upset with Judd Apatow about the
>sketch, "The Grungies." I completely understand why you would have been
>pissed off about seeing something similar to what you were working on at
the
>time. However, the idea for, "The Grungies," and all the initial writing
>and rewriting came from me. I also cast it, acted in it and edited it. I
>was and still am influenced by pop music and I thought it would be funny to
>satirize the seriousness of the Seattle grunge music scene with the
>ridiculous superficiality of "The Monkees" 1960s show. I hope that this
>clears up any misunderstanding.
>By the way, I am a huge fan of "That 70's Show." Congratulations on its
>well deserved success. I also think it's cool you set it in Wisconsin. I
>went to the University of Wisconsin at Madison and loved it.
>If you have any other questions don't hesitate to E-mail me.
>Jeff Kahn
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>--------------------------------
>
>-----------------
>
>
>Mark,
>I have no interest in talking with you on the phone any more. I know you
>are very successful and think that gives you the right to judge people and
>berate them regardless of the facts, but I have had enough of you for one
>day. I know it's hard to believe that your rock band TV idea, which every
>writer in this town has thought of at one point, was not on my mind half a
>year after you told it to me. Yes, you thought of breaking the fourth wall.
>Groucho and George Burns stole it from you. Maybe you should sue Bernie
>Mac. Why don't you sue the guys who have that new show "How To Be A Rock
>Star" on the WB. I must have told them your idea. Nobody has ever goofed
>on rock bands, not Spinal Tap or The Rutles or 800 Saturday Night Live
>sketches. I should have told everyone on the show, no rock band sketches,
>that's Brazil's area. So hold on to your hate and rage, even though it
>makes no sense. I'll go back to my life of thievery and leaching. As for
>the cancer, I'll wait till you get it and then steal it from you. By the
>way, that joke was one of my writer's, Rodney Rothman (see I credited him).
>See, I have no original thoughts. Sorry I bothered to figure this out.
>Judd
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>--------------------------------
>Judd
>How appropriate that you had to use someone else's joke to take a swipe at
>me. I told you my idea. You did it two weeks later, VERBATIM. Spew
>revisionist **** all you want. Everyone knows you're a hack. Also, everyone
>knows how you ****ed over Paul Feig on the new show. All your press
mentions
>"your" brilliant Freaks and Geeks, as if Feig didn't even do the series. It
>must have killed you when the true genius behind it got nominated for an
>Emmy. Is your wife still livid about someone in the neighborhood building a
>house just like hers? Tell her I know how she feels. The reason I called
>was to tell you to piss off. We'll never be "friends", regardless of the
>***** whining from your last e-mail. I respect you zero.
>See ya at the upfronts, bitch!
>Well...unless you get canceled before that.
>Until then, die in a fiery accident and taste your own blood.
>(Is that too angry?)
>Love, Brazill
>
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>--------------------------------
>Mark,
>
>I hope your anger is a joke, because if it isn't...wow. Here's a line by
>line reply. I have starred (*) the replies if you are confused by my
>format.
>
>How appropriate that you had to use someone else's joke to take a swipe at
>me.
>
>***That was the joke. How interesting that you couldn't understand that.
>You would think someone with the lineage of "Yard Dogs" would have the
>intellectual acumen to pick up on that. I feel for the writers that have to
>pitch to you. Never doubt how much they hate you.
>
>I told you my idea. You did it two weeks later, VERBATIM. Spew
>revisionist **** all you want.
>
>***How could I hear your idea, steal it, and then have it air two weeks
>later? It was a filmed sketch show . Sketches were written months before
>they aired. They were filmed six weeks before they aired. I thought you
>were a producer. Shouldn't you understand how these shows are made? Do you
>start writing episodes two weeks before they air? Maybe you stole "Yard
>Dogs" from me.
>
>Everyone knows you're a hack.
>
>***That's why I kiss the ass. Let me know who thinks I am a hack so I can
>kiss their ass as well. I also suck dick lately. That's how I got my
>Dreamworks deal.
>
>Also, everyone
>knows how you ****ed over Paul Feig on the new show. All your press
mentions
>"your" brilliant Freaks and Geeks, as if Feig didn't even do the series. It
>must have killed you when the true genius behind it got nominated for an
>Emmy.
>
>***I'm sure it's hard for you to believe, but I do not control the national
>media. That is only true in your paranoid mind. If I create a show they
>often mention the last show. If you create a new show by yourself, I doubt
>they will spend a lot of time talking about the Turners. When they write
>about "That 80's Show" I am sure they won't ever mention "That 70's Show."
>I wrote an entire article in the LA Times, a cover story in the calendar,
>that credited Paul for his work. He went from a struggling actor to an
>established writer/producer over the course of a year. He is still my
>friend and I am very happy that he was nominated for two Emmy's. He
>deserved it. I wasn't upset about his Emmy nominations, I already have
>enough. The certificates are so big you can only hang so many before it
>starts looking tacky.
>
>
>Is your wife still livid about someone in the neighborhood building a
>house just like hers?
>
>*** Yes.
>
>Tell her I know how she feels.
>
>***I'm on it.
>
>The reason I called
>was to tell you to piss off. We'll never be "friends," regardless of the
>***** whining from your last e-mail.
>
>***The funniest part of these e mails is how bad your sense of humor is.
>You neither get nor can tell a joke. After you said "get cancer" did you
>really think I was looking to heal our relationship? Usually the cancer
>insult is a closer. I'm sure everyone who has suffered with that
>appreciates your sharp wit.
>
>I respect you zero.
>
>***Oh no.
>
>See ya at the upfronts, bitch!
>Well...unless you get canceled before that.
>
>***If you think cancellation hurts me at this point, you haven't been
>following my career as closely as I thought. I guess you are too busy
>tracking my real estate problems.
>
>Until then, die in a fiery accident and taste your own blood.
>
>***That's a Sam Kinison line you stupid ****!!!! Hypocrite!!!!
>J'accuse!!!!
>
>(Is that too angry?)
>Love, Brazill
>
>
>***Mark, I have enjoyed this. It's good to see the tragedies of the past
>few months haven't watered down your passion. I guess if Mark Brazill
>doesn't go insane over stuff that makes no sense, the terrorists win.
>Good luck with "That 80's Show." And I look forward to "That 90's Show."
>
>Judd Apatow
>
>