Supermarket asks 42-year-old for ID

[waichingliu81]

Monday, August 17 2009, 16:22 BST

By Daniel Kilkelly, Entertainment Reporter

A 42-year-old woman has expressed anger after being asked to provide ID at a supermarket checkout.

Mother-of-three Wendy Arrowsmith was shopping at Sainsbury's in Brixham, Devon with her 9-year-old daughter Charlotte when she was asked to prove her age to buy alcohol.

According to the Daily Express, the worker in question refused to serve wine and brandy to Arrowsmith when she admitted that she had no identification with her. It is believed that a supervisor then backed the decision.

Speaking to the newspaper, Arrowsmith complained: "I thought it was a joke at first. I may look a bit younger than my true age but it was ridiculous. I'm all for company policy but it's also important for people to use their common sense.

"I found the whole episode really insulting. I feel they were over-zealous. The senior staff are paid enough to make a common-sense decision."

A Sainsbury's spokesperson refused to apologise for the row, explaining: "We have taken extensive advice to prevent children under the age of 18 buying alcohol.

"We operate a 'Think 25' policy where colleagues are trained to ask for ID from anyone they think looks younger than 25. This reduces the chances of alcohol mistakenly being sold to someone under the age of 18."

http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/odd/a172025/supermarket-asks-42-year-old-for-id.html

[Chocoholic]

I can sort of understand where she's coming from. I'm 28, but often get mistaken for a lot younger. However, I do think she's overreacting a little bit. She should take it as a compliment and move on. At least they didn't ask her if she wanted the senior discount ;)

[MickeyMac]

I get carded from time to time when I buy alcohol. One time I asked why and I was told so they could ring it up on the cash register. I am assuming thats true because I look like I am over 21.

[waichingliu81]

I can sort of understand where she's coming from. I'm 28, but often get mistaken for a lot younger. However, I do think she's overreacting a little bit. She should take it as a compliment and move on. At least they didn't ask her if she wanted the senior discount ;)

:lol: i think that what she should've done is instead of complaining to go to another store. there are people who look younger but are in the 30s, 40s, 50s and vice versa with those in their 20s.

sometimes, you cannot tell how old someone is and so often you would ask for ID as proof. if i was in a similar situation, i would calmly go about it in a civil manner and not cause a scene and produce my passport.

[browneyes106]

I get carded from time to time when I buy alcohol. One time I asked why and I was told so they could ring it up on the cash register. I am assuming thats true because I look like I am over 21.

I'm 24 but I look younger than my age and it always get carded. One of my friends had a weekend job at a convenient store last year and he said some business have register systems that need to have a birth date entered in on items like alcohol, cigarettes and R rated movies.

[browneyes106]

I think the woman is overreacting a bit. Employees sometimes want to do their best at their jobs and not mess up so I can understand carding. Last year New Mexico enacted a law that prohibits minors from buying spray paint at stores. My mom and aunt went to buy spray paint at a store and my mom was carded the cashier explained the new law to her. My mom thought it was weird that she was carded but she wasn't upset about it.

[Marvo301]

Having worked in customer service for years I can tell you it's a no win situation when it comes to asking for I.D.. Especially with female customers. If you don't ask then they're offended that you didn't think they were young enough looking to ask. If you do ask then they over react like this lady. That being said, the consequences of selling alcohol, tobacco, etc. to minors can be quite severe to both the employee and the business which is why they rely on official documentation and not common sense. It's a matter of protecting their own interests.

[phoebe7165]

First of all, she should've had her ID. Don't know about there, but here in the states, you're required by law to have your ID on you at all times.

Second, she just didn't overreact a little bit, she overreacted alot!!:crazy:

I'm also in my 40's and I get told I look younger than I am quite often. I also get carded occasionally, and that makes my day!!:D

[waichingliu81]

Having worked in customer service for years I can tell you it's a no win situation when it comes to asking for I.D.. Especially with female customers. If you don't ask then they're offended that you didn't think they were young enough looking to ask. If you do ask then they over react like this lady. That being said, the consequences of selling alcohol, tobacco, etc. to minors can be quite severe to both the employee and the business which is why they rely on official documentation and not common sense. It's a matter of protecting their own interests.

which is why it is the law for stores not to sell alcohol, tobacco to anyone who is under 18 or who looks underage. i think her reaction is silly, given as she should be aware of the 'think 25' policy that we have in the uk. i think therefore that sainburys made the correct decision. if she had some form of ID on her and produced it when asked, then the situation wouldn't have got ugly later on.

[Janice]

First of all, she should've had her ID. Don't know about there, but here in the states, you're required by law to have your ID on you at all times.
Is that true? I always go out without an ID.

Regarding the supermarket, I think they're complete morons. The woman probably looks 32, at the youngest. For a store to put a customer through that...and lose the sale and most likely the customer too is very short-sighted and rude on their part.

[Marvo301]

Is that true? I always go out without an ID.

Regarding the supermarket, I think they're complete morons. The woman probably looks 32, at the youngest. For a store to put a customer through that...and lose the sale and most likely the customer too is very short-sighted and rude on their part.
Speaking as a former customer service worker I'd rather lose a sale than lose my job! (which is one of the potential penalties for selling alcohol or tobacco to a minor)

[Janice]

Speaking as a former customer service worker I'd rather lose a sale than lose my job!
I'm sure this woman didn't look anywhere near 17 or even 25. Any store that would fire an employee for not selling liquor to a person in their 30s (40s?) is insane. I was a bartender for years. I knew who to card. If I ever refused service to someone in their 30s, that would have cost me my job. This stupidmarket fails to realize that they're a dime a dozen. People simply take their business elsewhere. In this economy, just stupid, beyond stupid.

[Stuck In The '70's]

We have a blockbuster here in town. I used to always walk up there and buy movies all the time. Well about 5 or 6 years ago the salesperson wouldn't sell me a movie because I didn't have ID. I left it home. It was very embarrassing and I've never been back sense. I've been in other stores and bought movies and I've never been carded. Hell I was probably 20 years older than that salesperson. It was ridiculous. I wasn't going to walk home which would have been about a 20 minute walk and then go back up there for that. They lost a customer. I probably spent over a hundred dollars a month in that store too. Some of the other employees there knew me but they said it was the new rules. Everyone gets carded. Hell one of the movies I had was a PG-13 movie and I couldn't even get that out.

[catlover79]

I used to work in the ticket booth at a movie theater and had to card people all the time. Not just for R-rated movies, but for all credit card purchases. I actually did card a woman for an R-rated movie once who was over 40 - she didn't look it a bit!! I was so embarrassed (:o ) but she really was happy!! She was thrilled that she got carded and looked so young. Needless to say, I was very relieved. :lol:

[Janice]

We have a blockbuster here in town. I used to always walk up there and buy movies all the time. Well about 5 or 6 years ago the salesperson wouldn't sell me a movie because I didn't have ID. I left it home. It was very embarrassing and I've never been back sense. I've been in other stores and bought movies and I've never been carded. Hell I was probably 20 years older than that salesperson. It was ridiculous. I wasn't going to walk home which would have been about a 20 minute walk and then go back up there for that. They lost a customer. I probably spent over a hundred dollars a month in that store too. Some of the other employees there knew me but they said it was the new rules. Everyone gets carded. Hell one of the movies I had was a PG-13 movie and I couldn't even get that out.
I don't blame you for taking your business elsehwere. I've managed two restaurants, and what was important was the bottom line. We never, ever served minors, and carded whenever there was any doubt about anyone's age. Still, had an employee carded someone who looked to be in at least their 30s, I would apologize to the patron, give them a free dessert and tell the Barney Fife worker to take it down a notch or ten.

[Liza]

The worker thinks you look under 25, take it as a compliment!

I think she's really upset because she didn't have her id on her. Unless she walked to the grocery store, she should have had it on her. In other words, her own dang fault.

[Liza]

First of all, she should've had her ID. Don't know about there, but here in the states, you're required by law to have your ID on you at all times.

Now I'm sorry, but that's simply not true. In the states, you're required to have your drivers liscense on you while driving. Otherwise, it is certainly not required.

[Doodyville10019]

For the record, I am 49 years old (or will be in October). If that were me they asked for an I.D. from, I'd show it, then kiss the clerk, the bagger AND the manager! Nice to know I could still pass for 25 someplace :lol: :eek: :p

[Janice]

The worker thinks you look under 25, take it as a compliment!

I think she's really upset because she didn't have her id on her. Unless she walked to the grocery store, she should have had it on her. In other words, her own dang fault.
This isn't about compliments. I also doubt she's upset that she didn't have her ID on her. I shop all the time without my ID on me. My husband is often waiting outside, or he drops me off and picks me up. This customer didn't do one dang thing wrong, and it's not her fault. She did nothing wrong but try to buy alcohol at the age of 42. Way to shift the blame and judge a person for not having their ID on them.

[Liza]

This isn't about compliments. I also doubt she's upset that she didn't have her ID on her. I shop all the time without my ID on me. My husband is often waiting outside, or he drops me off and picks me up. This customer didn't do one dang thing wrong, and it's not her fault. She did nothing wrong but try to buy alcohol at the age of 42. Way to shift the blame and judge a person for not having their ID on them.

My local supermarket has a sign up that says "We card EVERYONE, regardless of age." My 55 year old mother has to show her id to buy alcohol. So yeah, I still say I side with the store, not the customer who blew up over something so trivial.

[Janice]

My local supermarket has a sign up that says "We card EVERYONE, regardless of age." My 55 year old mother has to show her id to buy alcohol. So yeah, I still say I side with the store, not the customer who blew up over something so trivial.
Who said anything about the customer blowing up? That's YOUR store that does that, not the store in the article. They card people who look 25 or younger. I doubt this 42 year old woman looked 25.

[Liza]

Who said anything about the customer blowing up? That's YOUR store that does that, not the store in the article. They card people who look 25 or younger. I doubt this 42 year old woman looked 25.

So what, you think the store asked for her id just to annoy her? I think they weren't sure so they were playing on the safe side.

[Janice]

So what, you think the store asked for her id just to annoy her? I think they weren't sure so they were playing on the safe side.
For Heaven's sake, she's obviously an adult. They were overzealous. Their loss. Like I said, stores are a dime a dozen. The staff in the store is stupid. You never lose a customer over something like this. Any good manager knows this. You chase them out the door apologizing if you have to, but you never, ever lose a customer. The customer is always right, and in this case, the customer really was right.

[Chocoholic]

One day last September, I went into the local liquor store for my mom because she wanted some wine with dinner. She was in her gardening clothes and didn't want to go in. I had my ID (no license because I can't drive) and the guy still didn't believe that I was 27 at the time and told me to leave. I had to go out to the car and send my mom in. Didn't bother us at all because we now know that store definitely won't be selling alcohol to minors.

[Stuck In The '70's]

One day last September, I went into the local liquor store for my mom because she wanted some wine with dinner. She was in her gardening clothes and didn't want to go in. I had my ID (no license because I can't drive) and the guy still didn't believe that I was 27 at the time and told me to leave. I had to go out to the car and send my mom in. Didn't bother us at all because we now know that store definitely won't be selling alcohol to minors.
or to adults. What happens if your Mom wasn't in the car with you?

[Janice]

or to adults. What happens if your Mom wasn't in the car with you?
Not only that, but the guy sounds rude. She had an ID, and he still didn't believe her, and "told her to leave". Sounds rude to me. Not sure I'd want to frequent that store again, if it was me, unless I read the story wrong.

[Marvo301]

The bottom line here is that if this woman would of had I.D. with her she would have been able to purchase alcohol without any problem. It is not the clerks responsibility yo make sure that customers bring I.D. with them and it's not the store's responsibility either. That responsibility is entirely up to the customer.

[Janice]

When a person enters their, let's say even mid-30s, showing an ID shouldn't even be a consideration. This store isn't one that asks for an ID from everyone. Then I would understand, but their policy is for those who look 25 and younger.
The bottom line is the store lost a good customer, who left that store, went to another one and spent big money. Like I said, stupid. Refusing to apologize. Even now, they should be doing everything in their power to bring her back as a customer, but I really think the staff is stupid who don't want to admit they're wrong. She tells her family and friends. Word of mouth counts for a lot too.


http://www.express.co.uk/posts/view/120954/Mum-42-told-Prove-you-re-old-enough-to-buy-alcohol

"After vowing never to return, she went to another supermarket and spent £80 on shopping, including wine and brandy."

[Chocoholic]

Not only that, but the guy sounds rude. She had an ID, and he still didn't believe her, and "told her to leave". Sounds rude to me. Not sure I'd want to frequent that store again, if it was me, unless I read the story wrong.
I really didn't let it bother me. The guy was just trying to do his job. I saw him as someone who really wanted to make sure teens weren't buying alcohol. I don't even drink the stuff myself.

I do find it funny when store managers come up with different policies that they expect the employees to enforce, then when a customer complains about the policy, the managers get upset at the employees for enforcing the rule the managers themselves created in the first place :rolleyes: Happened all the time at the store I worked at. I'm glad I don't work retail anymore. You're damned if you do and damned if you don't.

[sara]

The store I work at 30 is the cut off age for carding, and I am horrible at guessing people's ages. Some things we have to card no matter what age. There certain over the counter drugs that you now have to buy at the service desk and Michigan law says you have to Id them. Even if they are 99, if they don't have an Id they aren't getting it.

[LuLu Rogers]

Every retail store or restaurant I've ever worked for has taught us all the same thing, if they look old enough to be your parents or older, don't card, Anyone younger than that card or get fired.

Honestly, how hard is it to reach into your purse or your pocket and pull out your id? :crazy:

[Brieannas21]

My local supermarket has a sign up that says "We card EVERYONE, regardless of age." My 55 year old mother has to show her id to buy alcohol. So yeah, I still say I side with the store, not the customer who blew up over something so trivial.


That is how it is where I live, it protects the store and the employee.

As others have said the woman overreacted, if it is a law or their store policy get over it, show your ID and move on. I do not see anything wrong with it. You need a license to drive, you should need an ID to buy Alcohol.

[LuLu Rogers]

As others have said the woman overreacted, if it is a law or their store policy get over it, show your ID and move on. I do not see anything wrong with it. You need a license to drive, you should need an ID to buy Alcohol.


Exactly, why is it such a damn inconvenience to pull out your id? They're not asking you to give up your first born. ;)

[Stuck In The '70's]

It's funny how times have changed. When I was 18 and in my early 20's I was never carded. I remember my Mom had me go to the store and get her a pack of cigarettes. I had no problem getting them. I rarely drink so I don't know about alcohol. I know I went into movie theaters and was never carded. Maybe it was too laxed back then but it has gone too far in the other direction now. It's ridiculous to card someone in their 40's. They are not children and they don't look like a teenager. I know I resented being told off by someone who wasn't even born when I was buying those cigarettes. She's lucky I didn't tell her what I thought of her or her store. Some other people in my family would have. They lost a good customer because I got those movies at another store and the funny thing is I wasn't carded there. lol Fact is I haven't been carded since.

[so elektrikkxx]

she should have been flattered that she was mistaken for such a young age and shouldn't have blown the whole thing out of proportion. she didn't have her ID, therefore she didn't get the alcohol. it's not the store's responsibility to ensure that she has her ID.

[Sharop]

Exactly, why is it such a damn inconvenience to pull out your id? They're not asking you to give up your first born. ;)

I believe the woman in the article didn't have any ID with her, so it wasn't that she thought it was an inconvenience to produce it - she didn't actually have it on hand to show it.

In the UK, I don't think people are required to carry ID on them at all times - so some people only carry it when they want to buy age-restricted products.

I can understand both sides. I think that when people reach the age of, say, about 35, most of them likely assume that by now they look older than the legal age to buy alcohol and so I think many probably wouldn't bother to take any ID with them because they think/know that they look old enough and so won't be asked for proof of their age. I think this was the same with this lady - she is now in her early 40s, so she is probably very used to buying alcohol without being asked to show ID and probably doesn't think to take it with her because she doesn't think that she will need it.

However, I do think that if the person on the till really thought that she might be under 25, then by asking for ID they were simply doing what they were told to do. So I don't really blame them. I just see it as a rather unfortunate situation.

[Sharop]

First of all, she should've had her ID. Don't know about there, but here in the states, you're required by law to have your ID on you at all times.

I live in the UK, and I don't think it is a requirement that we have to carry ID with us all the time.

I can see why you think that she should have had it with her, but I personally don't agree that she should have had it, firstly because, in the UK, people aren't required to have it all the time, and also because, like I said in my other post, she probably hasn't been asked for ID for years and likely no longer sees any need to take any with her when buying alcohol. I can understand why a person in their 40s would not take ID to buy alcohol, because by then they likely assume that the person serving them will realise that they are older than the age limit.

However, I still don't really blame the staff either.

[Liza]

For Heaven's sake, she's obviously an adult. They were overzealous. Their loss. Like I said, stores are a dime a dozen. The staff in the store is stupid. You never lose a customer over something like this. Any good manager knows this. You chase them out the door apologizing if you have to, but you never, ever lose a customer. The customer is always right, and in this case, the customer really was right.

Oh I totally disagree that the customer is always right. The customer is usually right, but no store is ever going to sell alcohol to someone they suspect might be underage no matter what. If she had turned out to be a minor they would have lost their liscense to sell alcohol... which would have cost them much more than one woman's groceries.

Besides, people can look much younger than they actually are. One of my friends turned 40 this year, and everyone thinks she's younger than me (I'm 27). The store was covering their butt.

[Liza]

Exactly, why is it such a damn inconvenience to pull out your id? They're not asking you to give up your first born. ;)

People are like that at the bank too. If a new teller asks an existing customer for id, they very often get yelled at. The customer doesn't care that the teller is doing their job, they just think that they should be "above" having to pull out their card :rolleyes:

[catlover79]

The store I work at 30 is the cut off age for carding, and I am horrible at guessing people's ages. Some things we have to card no matter what age. There certain over the counter drugs that you now have to buy at the service desk and Michigan law says you have to Id them. Even if they are 99, if they don't have an Id they aren't getting it.
How are you supposed to tell if someone is 30 without an ID? It's just so hard to tell sometimes.

[catlover79]

Exactly, why is it such a damn inconvenience to pull out your id? They're not asking you to give up your first born. ;)
Exactly!! In fact, I hand the cashier my license before I hand over my debit card/check.

[Dragonflies]

I say who cares if someone asks for ID. IMO a person should have it on them at all times. You need it to cash checks, or when you write checks. There is NO reason for someone not to have it on them.

[Sharop]

There is NO reason for someone not to have it on them.

I don't think that's true in all cases - unless I buy alcohol I don't take ID around with me because I generally don't need it. I don't have any cheques to cash and I don't write them. So I see no reason to take any ID with me.

[phoebe7165]

Is that true?

I was told this from an officer.

I always go out without an ID.

You must not use credit cards when you shop because even to use a credit card, I'm asked for my license quite often anymore.

[Sharop]

even to use a credit card, I'm asked for my license quite often anymore.

Wow, I've never heard of that happening. But remember, this incident took place in the UK (where I come from, although I'm half American because my Mum is from the USA) - and it's likely that the rules and regulations for this sort of thing are different in the UK. Rules in the US may not apply in the UK.

[Chocoholic]

even to use a credit card, I'm asked for my license quite often anymore.

Same here. I've also been asked to show ID when i've paid by check. I do hate it when they ask for my phone number though. I don't know why they need that.

I always carry my ID with me as well as important information in case of emergency. Whether it's the law or not, it's still helpful to have that kind of information with you, especially if it's medical. My cousin is an EMT and he says it's so much easier to help a person when they know who and what they're dealing with.

[so elektrikkxx]

Oh I totally disagree that the customer is always right. The customer is usually right, but no store is ever going to sell alcohol to someone they suspect might be underage no matter what. If she had turned out to be a minor they would have lost their liscense to sell alcohol... which would have cost them much more than one woman's groceries.

Besides, people can look much younger than they actually are. One of my friends turned 40 this year, and everyone thinks she's younger than me (I'm 27). The store was covering their butt.

agreed. and about "the customer is always right", that principle works when it comes to the idea that every customer is entitled to friendly, helpful service, but a lot of customers use the knowledge that the store clerks can't argue back as an excuse to be disrespectful and rude.

in this situation, the woman didn't have her ID, she didn't get to buy alcohol. her fault.

[phoebe7165]

Wow, I've never heard of that happening. But remember, this incident took place in the UK (where I come from, although I'm half American because my Mum is from the USA) - and it's likely that the rules and regulations for this sort of thing are different in the UK. Rules in the US may not apply in the UK.

I think it's for "identity theft" reasons. I'm not sure if identity theft is as big a problem in the UK, as it is in the US.

[Stuck In The '70's]

agreed. and about "the customer is always right", that principle works when it comes to the idea that every customer is entitled to friendly, helpful service, but a lot of customers use the knowledge that the store clerks can't argue back as an excuse to be disrespectful and rude.

in this situation, the woman didn't have her ID, she didn't get to buy alcohol. her fault.
It goes both ways. There are a lot of rude salesclerks around here. And if someone's rude to me then I'll be rude right back to them.

As for the ID. Stores are not consistent. Some are all over it and some aren't. All the times I have ID I'm never carded and the one time I didn't they made a big deal of it. Their loss. I don't miss that store at all.

[Scoobiedoo30]

if The guy was 42 why would the store asked for the ID

[Doodyville10019]

Let me put in my two cents:

Age restrictions have always been an issue with me, especially today in light of the way kids are now being treated like "young adults" - in the judicial system, in competition to get into most really good high schools and colleges, even in adults putting trememdous pressure on kids to do well in school, athletics, etc. (not to mention all the peer pressure out there). Even when I was in high school, we were never treated that way - there was never any pressure on us (as an age group) to succeed. But I also realize the environment where kids grow up has changed a lot, too.

Thee's one simple solution to all of this - drop the age restriction (or at least lower it to 16, like in some countries). The parents know their kid better than any government ever will, and if you drive your car drunk at 16, 17 and crash it, I don't feel sorry for you or your friends - you (and they) should have known better.

[Chocoholic]

It goes both ways. There are a lot of rude salesclerks around here. And if someone's rude to me then I'll be rude right back to them.


I've been on both sides of the counter and I do agree respect is a two-way street. Like someone else said, all too often the customer will use the "customer is always right" excuse to be rude, demanding, and even verbally abusive to the employees or to try to scam the business out of money or merchandise. (An example of the latter would be the people who expected Best Buy to honor the $9.99 mistake.) A good manager wouldn't allow that kind of behavior, but unfortunately too many give in to the customer just so they won't lose their business. The customer does not have the right to treat the employees like garbage. There were many times I'd come home from working at the store in tears because someone was horrible to me just for doing my job.

[Stuck In The '70's]

I've been on both sides of the counter and I do agree respect is a two-way street. Like someone else said, all too often the customer will use the "customer is always right" excuse to be rude, demanding, and even verbally abusive to the employees or to try to scam the business out of money or merchandise. (An example of the latter would be the people who expected Best Buy to honor the $9.99 mistake.) A good manager wouldn't allow that kind of behavior, but unfortunately too many give in to the customer just so they won't lose their business. The customer does not have the right to treat the employees like garbage. There were many times I'd come home from working at the store in tears because someone was horrible to me just for doing my job.
And I'm sorry that happened to you . I'm always polite when I go to the checkout line and I treat the cashiers with respect. Some though are rude and some don't even pay attention to what they are doing. One time a cashier wasn't even paying attention to what she was doing because she was busy talking to the bagboys. I didn't complain but I didn't like it. I can go on and on about some others especially at Walmart. To be fair though there are a lot of good ones too.

[Chocoholic]

That bothers me too when they don't pay the slightest bit of attention, but i usually just let it go. I find most retail workers are nice and helpful.

[Sharop]

if The guy was 42 why would the store asked for the ID

The store in question has a "25 and under" policy (meaning they will ask for ID from anyone they think looks under 25.) Even though the woman was over 40, it seems the cashier must have thought she looked younger than 25, so they asked for ID.

[Janice]

Oh I totally disagree that the customer is always right. The customer is usually right, but no store is ever going to sell alcohol to someone they suspect might be underage no matter what. If she had turned out to be a minor they would have lost their liscense to sell alcohol... which would have cost them much more than one woman's groceries.

Besides, people can look much younger than they actually are. One of my friends turned 40 this year, and everyone thinks she's younger than me (I'm 27). The store was covering their butt.
I'd bet my last dollar that nobody in this store suspected she was a minor. An overzealous clerk carded a person who was obviously an adult. They didn't want to back down, and senior staff backed them up. If she turned out to be a minor...there's no way this woman was turning out to be a minor, and the store knew it. I don't get all of this, "She SHOULD have had her ID on her". Why should she? Maybe she lived down the street or had someone outside the store waiting for her. Who knows her story. I travel without ID all the time. The store doesn't have a policy saying that everyone must produce an ID, regardless of age. At age 42, she felt comfortable enough to go to a grocery store and pick up some alcohol without being carded. She probably does it all the time. I'm certainly sure the woman didn't look 25 years old. As the woman said in the article, she expected some common sense from these people. She didn't get it.

I'm also getting a kick out of all these remarks that she should be flattered. What's so flattering about being in a grocery story, with your 9-year old daughter, and having to leave without your groceries, at the age of 42? The store is the big loser as she went elsewhere and spent about 150 bucks at another store. She'll continue to take her business elsewhere too. This all could have been avoided if, when the store manager was called over and realized that this 42-year old woman does not look 17 (or 25), apologized and instructed the cashier to ring up the order. A manager never allows an adult to walk out the door, leaving unpurchased items behind, for no good reason. You work it out. A good manager works things out.

[Janice]

I really didn't let it bother me. The guy was just trying to do his job. I saw him as someone who really wanted to make sure teens weren't buying alcohol. I don't even drink the stuff myself.
Did I misunderstand the story? You produced a valid ID, proving your age and the clerk still didn't believe you and told you to leave the store. Is that what happened? I'd be irate if I was treated that way, if that's what happened.

[Chocoholic]

Did I misunderstand the story? You produced a valid ID, proving your age and the clerk still didn't believe you and told you to leave the store. Is that what happened? I'd be irate if I was treated that way, if that's what happened.
Yes, that is what happened and no, I was not angry. My mom and I were laughing about it after. If this happened a few years ago, I definitely would have been pissed, but I've decided that I can't help it if people mistake me for much younger and it's just not worth getting upset about. It happens to me a lot.

If I actually did drink alcohol, I probably would have been angry, but I don't even like the stuff.

[Sharop]

Yes, that is what happened and no, I was not angry. My mom and I were laughing about it after. If this happened a few years ago, I definitely would have been pissed, but I've decided that I can't help it if people mistake me for much younger and it's just not worth getting upset about. It happens to me a lot.

If I actually did drink alcohol, I probably would have been angry, but I don't even like the stuff.

Did he explain why he didn't believe you? I mean, if your ID was valid, then what reason could he have had not to?

I appreciate that he was doing his job and being responsible, it just seems strange to me that he refused to believe you when you had valid proof of your age that you showed him.

[Janice]

Yes, that is what happened and no, I was not angry. My mom and I were laughing about it after. If this happened a few years ago, I definitely would have been pissed, but I've decided that I can't help it if people mistake me for much younger and it's just not worth getting upset about. It happens to me a lot.

If I actually did drink alcohol, I probably would have been angry, but I don't even like the stuff.
I'm sorry, but I feel that I'm missing something here. You produced a valid ID, yet you were still unable to purchase alchohol? I can't imagine anyone finding that funny. And being asked to leave a store...that's a lousy thing to say to a customer who is doing nothing wrong. You sure are easy going.

[Chocoholic]

He thought it wasn't my ID and that I looked way too young to be 27. This particular store got in trouble before for selling alcohol to minors, so I knew he was just trying to be real careful. He wasn't even rude, just firm.

[Janice]

He thought it wasn't my ID and that I looked way too young to be 27. This particular store got in trouble before for selling alcohol to minors, so I knew he was just trying to be real careful. He wasn't even rude, just firm.
It doesn't matter how much trouble the store had in the past, not accepting a valid ID and asking a person to leave a store is rude, even if you think it's not. It's more than rude. He was calling you a liar, by way of not believing your ID was valid. Like I said, you must be an easy going person.

[Sharop]

He thought it wasn't my ID and that I looked way too young to be 27. This particular store got in trouble before for selling alcohol to minors, so I knew he was just trying to be real careful. He wasn't even rude, just firm.

Ah - I'm assuming your ID did not contain a photograph of yourself, then? As surely if there had been a picture there then he would have had to have realised it was you.

I can understand his actions, although, as Janice pointed out, he was effectively accusing you of being a liar - if it had happened to me, I would have probably left without making a scene, but privately I would have felt insulted that I was thought to be a liar.

[Stuck In The '70's]

He thought it wasn't my ID and that I looked way too young to be 27. This particular store got in trouble before for selling alcohol to minors, so I knew he was just trying to be real careful. He wasn't even rude, just firm.
You are a real nice person and you didn't deserve that to happen to you. It doesn't matter if the store was robbed before. You showed him a valid ID and he refused you service. Maybe you didn't care about the alcohol but this could have happened anywhere. You are 27 and they didn't show you respect. I would have been furious if this would have happened to me.

[Stuck In The '70's]

I'd bet my last dollar that nobody in this store suspected she was a minor. An overzealous clerk carded a person who was obviously an adult. They didn't want to back down, and senior staff backed them up. If she turned out to be a minor...there's no way this woman was turning out to be a minor, and the store knew it. I don't get all of this, "She SHOULD have had her ID on her". Why should she? Maybe she lived down the street or had someone outside the store waiting for her. Who knows her story. I travel without ID all the time. The store doesn't have a policy saying that everyone must produce an ID, regardless of age. At age 42, she felt comfortable enough to go to a grocery store and pick up some alcohol without being carded. She probably does it all the time. I'm certainly sure the woman didn't look 25 years old. As the woman said in the article, she expected some common sense from these people. She didn't get it.

I'm also getting a kick out of all these remarks that she should be flattered. What's so flattering about being in a grocery story, with your 9-year old daughter, and having to leave without your groceries, at the age of 42? The store is the big loser as she went elsewhere and spent about 150 bucks at another store. She'll continue to take her business elsewhere too. This all could have been avoided if, when the store manager was called over and realized that this 42-year old woman does not look 17 (or 25), apologized and instructed the cashier to ring up the order. A manager never allows an adult to walk out the door, leaving unpurchased items behind, for no good reason. You work it out. A good manager works things out.
They backed the salesperson is all. They knew she was an older woman. I've never met anybody in their 40's that I thought was in their teens or early 20's. They treated this lady just like a kid and here she is in a store with her own kid. It's embarrassing is what it was. Nothing to be flattered about. Common sense isn't relevant in today's America I guess.

[Sharop]

Common sense isn't relevant in today's America I guess.

This event took place in the UK, not the US. :)

[Stuck In The '70's]

This event took place in the UK, not the US. :)
Yea that's right. :lol: I guess there isn't no common sense over there either. :lol:

[catlover79]

Yea that's right. :lol: I guess there isn't no common sense over there either. :lol:
Yeah, who says we have nothing in common? :lol:

[so elektrikkxx]

I've been on both sides of the counter and I do agree respect is a two-way street. Like someone else said, all too often the customer will use the "customer is always right" excuse to be rude, demanding, and even verbally abusive to the employees or to try to scam the business out of money or merchandise. (An example of the latter would be the people who expected Best Buy to honor the $9.99 mistake.) A good manager wouldn't allow that kind of behavior, but unfortunately too many give in to the customer just so they won't lose their business. The customer does not have the right to treat the employees like garbage. There were many times I'd come home from working at the store in tears because someone was horrible to me just for doing my job.

today i offered to bag a customer's groceries at the self-scan register next to the one i was on, and instead of saying no thank you or accepting my help, he insulted my hair and told me it looked like a bird's nest. i was so angry but i kept my mouth shut.

[Schmoopie]

I've been carded lots of times, but it doesn't really bother me. A lot of stores and restaurants in Washington State will card you for alcohol (I don't drink, though), regardless of how old you are. I've seen many places ask for ID with credit cards and so forth as well.

Andrea

[comedyfreak]

I would have taken it as a compliment, at most places they have a sign that says they card under 35.

[waichingliu81]

The store in question has a "25 and under" policy (meaning they will ask for ID from anyone they think looks under 25.) Even though the woman was over 40, it seems the cashier must have thought she looked younger than 25, so they asked for ID.

:clap thank you!

[Sharop]

today i offered to bag a customer's groceries at the self-scan register next to the one i was on, and instead of saying no thank you or accepting my help, he insulted my hair and told me it looked like a bird's nest. i was so angry but i kept my mouth shut.

Wow, that was incredibly rude and uncalled for. Especially after you had offered to help him too. Well done for keeping quiet.

[OH Nuts!]

today i offered to bag a customer's groceries at the self-scan register next to the one i was on, and instead of saying no thank you or accepting my help, he insulted my hair and told me it looked like a bird's nest. i was so angry but i kept my mouth shut.

How terrible. What a rude f*** of a person. If it happened to me I would have been shocked too. Honestly, I'm just flabbergasted by the behavior I see (and hear) at times.

[OH Nuts!]

Sorry I'm signing on late to all of this but sometimes I miss a post or two. I totally agree that if someone CLEARLY looks well over the age limit, I don't see the necessity of carding them. Honestly, you'd think common sense was a felony the way some sales staff and managers behave. I think the lady should have just taken her business elsewhere rather than get stressed out/insulted - but yes - experiencing stupidity can be very draining. With my gray hair and (the start of) wrinkles I don't think I have to worry abt being mistaken for a teen. But, ten yrs from now, God willing I'm still here, I'll be tickled pink to be asked for ID that I'm 62+

[waichingliu81]

today i offered to bag a customer's groceries at the self-scan register next to the one i was on, and instead of saying no thank you or accepting my help, he insulted my hair and told me it looked like a bird's nest. i was so angry but i kept my mouth shut.

that's just terrible. glad to know that you handled the situation well, without going ballistic. there are certain people out there who need to learn some manners and treat everyone- especially the staff with respect.

[Family Ties Forever!]

I don't think it should necessarily come down to whether the woman should have had her id with her or not. I doubt she looked 25 let alone 17. So are you telling me the cashier figured her 9-year-old daughter was her 'younger' sister? :lol: I agree with those who said that a little common sense goes a long way.

Even I find it a little strange that people assume I'm so much younger than I am. I'm 30 and will turn 31 this year. I got back from Florida today. I went to show the lady behind the counter in the airport my id and she told me I didn't have to because I was "under 18". I told her I was over 18. When I showed her my id and told her I was born in 1978 she was shocked. The lady then preceded to tell me that I "would be carded for years to come".

[Chocoholic]

^ That's me too, Jen. I'm 28 and get mistaken for a kid or teen all the time. I'm sure you and I will appreciate it when we're in our 40's :lol:

[Sharop]

It's amazing how people can sometimes look much younger or older than they are. It can both be a help or a hindrance, depending on the situation.

A friend of mine has a younger brother who is 14, and will be 15 in September, but you would never know it to look at him. He looks about 10 or 11. He's still very small and I don't believe his voice has broken yet.

However, he may be one of those that shoots straight up when they finally hit puberty. I suppose he must be what's called a "late bloomer."