Frank Gannucci
06-24-2009, 12:29 PM
"Expectant Father":
(Ralph thinks that he is going to be a father. He wants his new boy to be a fighter.)
Ed: "Why don't you name the kid Percy?"
Ralph: "Percy?"
Ed: "With a name like that, he will be fighting all the time."
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":
Ed: "I got a solution on how we should remove the dresser. The drawers are probably filled with junk."
Ralph: "That's not a bad idea."
(Ed takes the drawers and puts them on top of the dresser.)
Ralph: "Okay, let's go."
"A Dog's Life":
(Ralph is at the dog pound. He just gave back Alice's dog that he hated, but slowly and surely he started not hating it.)
Ralph: "Is my dog going to get a good home?"
Man: "I hope so."
Ralph: "What do you mean by that?"
Man: "We have several dogs who are only supposed to be here for four days. We got several who are over the limit."
Ralph: "What happens to the dogs who are over the limit?"
Man: "They have to be destoryed."
Ralph: "You mean to tell me that the dog I just gave back is going to be destroyed?" (going into the room where all the dogs are, yells): "WAIT A MINUTE!"
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":
Ralph: "Is this your idea of a joke Norton?"
Ed: "No, that's my idea of a burn."
"Hair To A Fortune":
Ed: "Bottle #2: Ho (H2O)"
(Ed dumps the H2O in the bowl in a rather unique way.)
Ralph: "Take it easy with that H20. What do you think it is, water?"
"Songwriters":
Ralph: "Berlin threw away a lot of bad lines."
Alice: "Yeah, if you can only find out where he threw them."
"Flushing Ho":
Ralph: "Do you know what it like Alice to own a home? You can walk outside, pick up some dirt and say: 'This is all mine.'"
Alice: "I can go out in the hallway right now and do the same thing."
"The Sleepwalker":
Ralph: "All right Weisenhemimer. I am now going to put the key in a place which even if you know that it was there, you wouldn't be able to get it. I am going to put it under my pillow. Now, you will have to lift me up bodily in order to get the key."
Ed: "I got to hand it to you Ralph. You came up with something even Dick Tracy couldn't solve."
"Stars Over Flatbush":
(Ralph is trying to scratch an itch on his back by rubbing his back on the ice box. Ed comes in.)
Ed: "What do you say there Taurus?"
Ralph: "I was trying to scratch an itch that I couldn't reach."
Ed: "Oh, for a minute there I thought you were practicing the ol' Shake, Rattle & Roll."
(Ralph thinks that he is going to be a father. He wants his new boy to be a fighter.)
Ed: "Why don't you name the kid Percy?"
Ralph: "Percy?"
Ed: "With a name like that, he will be fighting all the time."
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":
Ed: "I got a solution on how we should remove the dresser. The drawers are probably filled with junk."
Ralph: "That's not a bad idea."
(Ed takes the drawers and puts them on top of the dresser.)
Ralph: "Okay, let's go."
"A Dog's Life":
(Ralph is at the dog pound. He just gave back Alice's dog that he hated, but slowly and surely he started not hating it.)
Ralph: "Is my dog going to get a good home?"
Man: "I hope so."
Ralph: "What do you mean by that?"
Man: "We have several dogs who are only supposed to be here for four days. We got several who are over the limit."
Ralph: "What happens to the dogs who are over the limit?"
Man: "They have to be destoryed."
Ralph: "You mean to tell me that the dog I just gave back is going to be destroyed?" (going into the room where all the dogs are, yells): "WAIT A MINUTE!"
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":
Ralph: "Is this your idea of a joke Norton?"
Ed: "No, that's my idea of a burn."
"Hair To A Fortune":
Ed: "Bottle #2: Ho (H2O)"
(Ed dumps the H2O in the bowl in a rather unique way.)
Ralph: "Take it easy with that H20. What do you think it is, water?"
"Songwriters":
Ralph: "Berlin threw away a lot of bad lines."
Alice: "Yeah, if you can only find out where he threw them."
"Flushing Ho":
Ralph: "Do you know what it like Alice to own a home? You can walk outside, pick up some dirt and say: 'This is all mine.'"
Alice: "I can go out in the hallway right now and do the same thing."
"The Sleepwalker":
Ralph: "All right Weisenhemimer. I am now going to put the key in a place which even if you know that it was there, you wouldn't be able to get it. I am going to put it under my pillow. Now, you will have to lift me up bodily in order to get the key."
Ed: "I got to hand it to you Ralph. You came up with something even Dick Tracy couldn't solve."
"Stars Over Flatbush":
(Ralph is trying to scratch an itch on his back by rubbing his back on the ice box. Ed comes in.)
Ed: "What do you say there Taurus?"
Ralph: "I was trying to scratch an itch that I couldn't reach."
Ed: "Oh, for a minute there I thought you were practicing the ol' Shake, Rattle & Roll."