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Frank Gannucci
03-09-2009, 08:25 AM
"Ralph Kramden, Hero At Large" (aka "Trapped"):

Ralph: "You are the only man that can turn my stomach upside-down."

Ed: "There isn't a man in this city that is strong enough to do that."

"The Sleepwalker":

Ralph: "Do you care if I waste away?"

Alice: "Sure I do Ralph. But you wouldn't waste away if you stayed awake for nine years."

"The Sleepwalker":

Ralph: "All right Wisenheimer. I am going to put the key in a place where even if you know where it is, you wouldn't be able to find it. I am going to put it right under my pillow. Now, you will have to lift me up bodily in order to get the key."

Ed: "I got to hand it to you Ralph. You came up with something even Dick Tracy couldn't solve."

"Finders Keepers":

Ralph: "I know New York from top to bottom."

Ed: "I have been working in the sewer for years. I know New York from bottom to top."

"Two Tickets To The Fight":

Ralph (yells): "I AM NOT MISSING THE BEST FIGHT OF THE YEAR."

Alice (yells): "LISTEN. YOU WALK OUT THAT DOOR AND YOU WILL BE IN THE BEST FIGHT OF THE YEAR."

"A Weighty Problem Part 1":

Fred: "You will have to eat just as much to keep you alive Ralph."

Ed: "Even that will be too much."

"Sun & Fun & The Raccoon Capital":

(Ralph is trying to get into his uniform…his pants are too big. In the storyline, [and Jackie in real life, of course] he lost weight.)

Ralph: "If I go out in these, I will be a laughing stock."

Ed: "If you don't, you will get a few laughs too."

"King of The Castle":

(Ralph explains to Ed that one time Alice wanted him to come home, but Ralph didn't.)

Ralph: "I showed her who's boss."

Ed: "What happened when you came home?"

Ralph: "Never mind about that."

"King of The Castle":

Ed: "You should write in the paper: 'I Ralph Kramden, do not assume the debts of Alice Kramden.'"

Ralph: "It won't work. I tried that the day after we were married."