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Frank Gannucci
02-20-2009, 09:19 AM
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":

(Ralph picks up the burnt jacket.)

Ralph: "Is this your idea of a joke Norton?"

Ed: "No, that's my idea of a burn."

"Ralph's Sweet Tooth":

(Ralph has kept the whole building awake because of his toothache.)

Ralph: "If I bite into one of those Choosy-Chews, I will die."

Garrity (from upstairs, yells): "GIVE HIM A CHOOSY-CHEW!"

"Move Uptown":

(A cop comes by as Ralph & Ed are moving things. He thinks that they are burglars.)

Ralph: "Norton, tell him who I am and that I live here."

Ed: "Wait a minute. I want to know if we are being booked on an 802 or 605."

"Battle of The Sexes":

Ralph: "All this food is wearing me down."

Ed: "Yeah, I see that you are wasting away to a blimp."

"The New Bowling Ball":

Ralph: "My bowling ball got stuck on my finger and I can't get it off."

Ed: "Why don't you go on a diet? Maybe, it will drop off."

"The Main Event":

Ralph: "Do you want my salary to leak out?"

Alice: "Your salary couldn't even drip out."

"The Babysitter":

Ralph: "That phone is for you-you-you."

(Phone rings. Alice answers it.)

Alice: "Hello?..."(poking Ralph with the receiver): "It's for you-you-you."

"Curse of The Kramdens":

Man: "Carry Mr. Kramden to the train station."

(The men try to pick up Ralph but to no avail.)

Ed: "I think it would be easier if you went to the train station, picked it up, and carried it back here."

"Better Living Through TV":

Ralph: "You can't put your arms around a memory."

Alice: "I can't even put my arms around you."