Frank Gannucci
09-29-2008, 09:26 AM
"Mod Couple" (aka "Honeymooners In England"):
(All four of them are rehearsing for the commercial.)
Trixie: "I don't think I am the maid type."
Ed: "She's right. Ralph, do you have a part that will be her type, like a bulldog?"
"Be It Ever So Humble":
Alice: "Ralph, waht do you want with your pancakes?"
Ralph (from other room): "What do you have?"
Alice: "Bacon, ham and sausage."
Ralph (from other room): "Okay."
Alice: "What's okay?"
Ralph (from other room): "Bacon, ham and sausage."
"Dial J For Janitor":
(Ed, who has been complaing to Ralph, the janitor about the lack of water in his apartment because of Ralph's neglience as janitor, comes in looking like he's sick.)
Ralph: "Can I get you anything?"
Ed: "Yes. Water! Water! Water! I want water!"
"Dial J For Janitor":
Ed: "When I was in the Navy, I went to see the doctor because my head hurt. The doctor said that it was a tumor and that he would remove it. He did. When I came back from the doctor, all the men asked me: 'What did the doctor remove, the tumor or the brain?'"
Ralph: "You don't have to ask me. I know what he removed."
"The Safety Award":
Ralph: "A group of men are picked to do a job. Trained in the same fashion as each other. There's always one man in the group that stands far in front of the others."
Ed: "Yeah, I guess you are right there Ralph. If you stood any more out in front, you wouldn't be able to get behind the wheel of a bus."
"Man In The Blue Suit":
Ralph: "I want you to know Alice that it was pretty lonely around here without you."
Trixie: "Aw Ed, why don't you ever talk to me like that?"
Ed: "I would be very happy too if you only go away once in a while."
"Hero Part 1":
Ed: "When we are playing stickball, why am I always chosen first to be on somebody's team?"
Ralph: "Because you are the only one that will get the ball when it goes down the sewer."
"Hero Part 1":
Tommy: "Did you know Mr. Kramden when he was a football star?"
Ed: "No Tommy. I was in Prep School at the time."
"In Twenty-Five Words Or Less":
Ed: "Why not call the dog Ralph."
Ralph: "Ralph?"
Ed: "Yeah, not only can people call him, dogs can call him too. Ralph! Ruff! Ralph! Ruff!"
Ralph (yells): "GET OUT!"
(All four of them are rehearsing for the commercial.)
Trixie: "I don't think I am the maid type."
Ed: "She's right. Ralph, do you have a part that will be her type, like a bulldog?"
"Be It Ever So Humble":
Alice: "Ralph, waht do you want with your pancakes?"
Ralph (from other room): "What do you have?"
Alice: "Bacon, ham and sausage."
Ralph (from other room): "Okay."
Alice: "What's okay?"
Ralph (from other room): "Bacon, ham and sausage."
"Dial J For Janitor":
(Ed, who has been complaing to Ralph, the janitor about the lack of water in his apartment because of Ralph's neglience as janitor, comes in looking like he's sick.)
Ralph: "Can I get you anything?"
Ed: "Yes. Water! Water! Water! I want water!"
"Dial J For Janitor":
Ed: "When I was in the Navy, I went to see the doctor because my head hurt. The doctor said that it was a tumor and that he would remove it. He did. When I came back from the doctor, all the men asked me: 'What did the doctor remove, the tumor or the brain?'"
Ralph: "You don't have to ask me. I know what he removed."
"The Safety Award":
Ralph: "A group of men are picked to do a job. Trained in the same fashion as each other. There's always one man in the group that stands far in front of the others."
Ed: "Yeah, I guess you are right there Ralph. If you stood any more out in front, you wouldn't be able to get behind the wheel of a bus."
"Man In The Blue Suit":
Ralph: "I want you to know Alice that it was pretty lonely around here without you."
Trixie: "Aw Ed, why don't you ever talk to me like that?"
Ed: "I would be very happy too if you only go away once in a while."
"Hero Part 1":
Ed: "When we are playing stickball, why am I always chosen first to be on somebody's team?"
Ralph: "Because you are the only one that will get the ball when it goes down the sewer."
"Hero Part 1":
Tommy: "Did you know Mr. Kramden when he was a football star?"
Ed: "No Tommy. I was in Prep School at the time."
"In Twenty-Five Words Or Less":
Ed: "Why not call the dog Ralph."
Ralph: "Ralph?"
Ed: "Yeah, not only can people call him, dogs can call him too. Ralph! Ruff! Ralph! Ruff!"
Ralph (yells): "GET OUT!"