Frank Gannucci
09-04-2008, 06:17 PM
"The Bensonhurst Bomber":
Little Man: "My pal Harvey is bigger than me."
Ralph: "I got a friend Shirley who is bigger than you."
"Life Upon The Wicked Stage":
Ralph: "The theater has been in me all my life."
Alice: "Yeah, I knew that that wasn't your stomach. It was the balcony."
"Brother-In-Law":
Stan: "Are there any openings at the bus depot?"
Ralph: "No."
Stan: "Then how do you get in the building?"
"Dinner Guest":
Man: "Me and my wife are big TV fans. Where's the TV?"
Ralph (speaking at the same time as Alice): "It's out getting repaired."
Alice (speaking at the same time as Ralph): "We don't have a TV set."
Ralph (speaking at the same time as Alice): "We don't have a TV set."
Alice (speaking at the same time as Ralph): "It's out getting repaired."
Ralph: "What my wife is trying to say is that if we had a TV set, it would be out getting repaired."
"Boys & Girls Together":
Alice: "Well Ralph, I am ready to sit down."
Ralph: "So?"
Alice: "Well, who's going to help me with my chair?"
Ralph: "There's only two of us in the room so unless you have a torn ligament or something, you'll do it."
"Dial J For Janitor":
(Ed is trying to bang his pipes to get water for his apartment. Ralph goes to the window and sticks his head out.)
Ralph (yells): "NORTON, WOULD YOU STOP THAT BANGING? I GOT A HEADACHE."
Ed (from upstairs, yells): "I NEED WATER. I NEED TO TAKE A BATH."
Ralph (yells): "DO ME A FAVOR AND STAY DIRTY JUST FOR THE NIGHT."
"Unconventional Behavior":
(Ed & Ralph are handcuffed on a train. Ed tried saying "Boomph" to get out, like he was instructed but it doesn't work.)
Ralph: "I have had enough of the boomphing. Get the key out and open them up."
Ed: "There ain't no key. You got to boomph your way out."
Ralph (yells): "I AM GOING TO BOOMPH YOU OUT OF THE WHOLE CAR."
"King of The Castle":
(Ed shows his bandage on his head to Ralph.)
Ralph: "What happened to you?"
Ed: "When I said to Trixie that I am the King of The Castle, Trixie crowned me."
"Movies Are Better Than Ever":
Ralph: "Talk is cheap."
Alice: "It must be or you would have never opened your mouth."
Little Man: "My pal Harvey is bigger than me."
Ralph: "I got a friend Shirley who is bigger than you."
"Life Upon The Wicked Stage":
Ralph: "The theater has been in me all my life."
Alice: "Yeah, I knew that that wasn't your stomach. It was the balcony."
"Brother-In-Law":
Stan: "Are there any openings at the bus depot?"
Ralph: "No."
Stan: "Then how do you get in the building?"
"Dinner Guest":
Man: "Me and my wife are big TV fans. Where's the TV?"
Ralph (speaking at the same time as Alice): "It's out getting repaired."
Alice (speaking at the same time as Ralph): "We don't have a TV set."
Ralph (speaking at the same time as Alice): "We don't have a TV set."
Alice (speaking at the same time as Ralph): "It's out getting repaired."
Ralph: "What my wife is trying to say is that if we had a TV set, it would be out getting repaired."
"Boys & Girls Together":
Alice: "Well Ralph, I am ready to sit down."
Ralph: "So?"
Alice: "Well, who's going to help me with my chair?"
Ralph: "There's only two of us in the room so unless you have a torn ligament or something, you'll do it."
"Dial J For Janitor":
(Ed is trying to bang his pipes to get water for his apartment. Ralph goes to the window and sticks his head out.)
Ralph (yells): "NORTON, WOULD YOU STOP THAT BANGING? I GOT A HEADACHE."
Ed (from upstairs, yells): "I NEED WATER. I NEED TO TAKE A BATH."
Ralph (yells): "DO ME A FAVOR AND STAY DIRTY JUST FOR THE NIGHT."
"Unconventional Behavior":
(Ed & Ralph are handcuffed on a train. Ed tried saying "Boomph" to get out, like he was instructed but it doesn't work.)
Ralph: "I have had enough of the boomphing. Get the key out and open them up."
Ed: "There ain't no key. You got to boomph your way out."
Ralph (yells): "I AM GOING TO BOOMPH YOU OUT OF THE WHOLE CAR."
"King of The Castle":
(Ed shows his bandage on his head to Ralph.)
Ralph: "What happened to you?"
Ed: "When I said to Trixie that I am the King of The Castle, Trixie crowned me."
"Movies Are Better Than Ever":
Ralph: "Talk is cheap."
Alice: "It must be or you would have never opened your mouth."