Frank Gannucci
08-31-2008, 10:17 AM
"TV or Not TV":
(Ralph is trying to tell Alice that he has more money in is wallet than Ed.)
Ralph: "I have it here."
(Ralph points to his hip pocket.)
Alice: "You have it here..." (Points to her left hip.) "...you have it here..." (Points to her right hip.) "...and you have it here." (Points to her stomach.)
"Better Living Through TV":
Ralph: "What is the first thing that a person has to do if he wants to sell something?"
Ed: "Well, first they look your name (Ralph's) in the phonebook and then they try to sell it to you."
"Ralph's Big Mouth" (aka "Mind Your Own Business"):
Ralph: "I'm going to get his job back for him Alice. Tomorrow, I am going to go down that sewer tomorrow and speak to Ed's boss. there isn't anything in this world that is going to stop me from going down that sewer tomorrow."
Alice: "Oh no? There isn't a manhole in this city that you can fit through."
"Cottage For Sale Part 1":
Ralph: "What kind of life do you think that I lead in this city driving a bus all day? What do I hear? Taxi horns, police whistles, fire engines, breaks schreeching and people hollering. When I finish my work and come home what do I hear? Babies crying, garbage cans-a-rattlin', peddles-a-yellin'. I ask you. What do I have to do to get a little peace and quiet?"
Alice: "Why don't you shut up?"
"My Fair Landlord":
Ralph: "The person who lent me this place was an ex-GI."
Alice: "Who was he, Benedict Arnold?"
"My Fair Landlord":
Ed: "Can you paint this place during a time when I am not here like on a Sunday?"
Ralph: "Why not now?"
Ed: "I can't stand the smell of paint."
Ralph: "Are you kidding me? You work in the sewer all day and you can't stand the smell of paint?"
"Sees All, Knows All":
Ralph: "Norton, I am not going to die."
Ed: "You mean never?"
"Lawsuit" (Color):
(Ralph is trying to stand on his bad leg while Ed is cracking walnuts.)
Ralph (yells): "I BROKE IT ALICE! I BROKE IT!"
Alice: "That was Ed cracking walnuts."
Ralph (to Ed, yells): "YOU ARE A MENTAL CASE."
"Life Upon The Wicked Stage":
Alice: "Me & Trixie are rehearsing."
Ralph: "For what, the Bellevue Follies?"
(Ralph is trying to tell Alice that he has more money in is wallet than Ed.)
Ralph: "I have it here."
(Ralph points to his hip pocket.)
Alice: "You have it here..." (Points to her left hip.) "...you have it here..." (Points to her right hip.) "...and you have it here." (Points to her stomach.)
"Better Living Through TV":
Ralph: "What is the first thing that a person has to do if he wants to sell something?"
Ed: "Well, first they look your name (Ralph's) in the phonebook and then they try to sell it to you."
"Ralph's Big Mouth" (aka "Mind Your Own Business"):
Ralph: "I'm going to get his job back for him Alice. Tomorrow, I am going to go down that sewer tomorrow and speak to Ed's boss. there isn't anything in this world that is going to stop me from going down that sewer tomorrow."
Alice: "Oh no? There isn't a manhole in this city that you can fit through."
"Cottage For Sale Part 1":
Ralph: "What kind of life do you think that I lead in this city driving a bus all day? What do I hear? Taxi horns, police whistles, fire engines, breaks schreeching and people hollering. When I finish my work and come home what do I hear? Babies crying, garbage cans-a-rattlin', peddles-a-yellin'. I ask you. What do I have to do to get a little peace and quiet?"
Alice: "Why don't you shut up?"
"My Fair Landlord":
Ralph: "The person who lent me this place was an ex-GI."
Alice: "Who was he, Benedict Arnold?"
"My Fair Landlord":
Ed: "Can you paint this place during a time when I am not here like on a Sunday?"
Ralph: "Why not now?"
Ed: "I can't stand the smell of paint."
Ralph: "Are you kidding me? You work in the sewer all day and you can't stand the smell of paint?"
"Sees All, Knows All":
Ralph: "Norton, I am not going to die."
Ed: "You mean never?"
"Lawsuit" (Color):
(Ralph is trying to stand on his bad leg while Ed is cracking walnuts.)
Ralph (yells): "I BROKE IT ALICE! I BROKE IT!"
Alice: "That was Ed cracking walnuts."
Ralph (to Ed, yells): "YOU ARE A MENTAL CASE."
"Life Upon The Wicked Stage":
Alice: "Me & Trixie are rehearsing."
Ralph: "For what, the Bellevue Follies?"