Frank Gannucci
04-10-2008, 12:55 PM
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":
(Ralph picks up the burnt jacket.)
Ralph: "Is this your idea of a joke Norton?"
Ed: "No, that's my idea of a burn."
"Ralph's Sweet Tooth":
(Ralph has kept the whole building awake because of his toothache.)
Ralph: "If I bite into one of those Choosy-Chews, I will die."
Garrity (from upstairs, yells): "GIVE HIM A CHOOSY-CHEW!"
"Move Uptown":
(A cop comes by as Ralph & Ed are moving things. He thinks that they are burglars.)
Ralph: "Norton, tell him who I am and that I live here."
Ed: "Wait a minute. I want to know if we are being booked on an 802 or 605."
"Battle of The Sexes":
Ralph: "All this food is wearing me down."
Ed: "Yeah, I see that you are wasting away to a blimp."
"The New Bowling Ball":
Ralph: "My bowling ball got stuck on my finger and I can't get it off."
Ed: "Why don't you go on a diet? Maybe, it will drop off."
"The Main Event":
Ralph: "Do you want my salary to leak out?"
Alice: "Your salary couldn't even drip out."
"The Babysitter":
Ralph: "That phone is for you-you-you."
(Phone rings. Alice answers it.)
Alice: "Hello?..."(poking Ralph with the receiver): "It's for you-you-you."
"Curse of The Kramdens":
Man: "Carry Mr. Kramden to the train station."
(The men try to pick up Ralph but to no avail.)
Ed: "I think it would be easier if you went to the train station, picked it up, and carried it back here."
"A Dog's Life":
Ralph: "Gee, I remember when I used to weigh 165. Did you see me when I weighed 165?"
Ed: "No Ralph. I never did see your baby pictures."
(Ralph picks up the burnt jacket.)
Ralph: "Is this your idea of a joke Norton?"
Ed: "No, that's my idea of a burn."
"Ralph's Sweet Tooth":
(Ralph has kept the whole building awake because of his toothache.)
Ralph: "If I bite into one of those Choosy-Chews, I will die."
Garrity (from upstairs, yells): "GIVE HIM A CHOOSY-CHEW!"
"Move Uptown":
(A cop comes by as Ralph & Ed are moving things. He thinks that they are burglars.)
Ralph: "Norton, tell him who I am and that I live here."
Ed: "Wait a minute. I want to know if we are being booked on an 802 or 605."
"Battle of The Sexes":
Ralph: "All this food is wearing me down."
Ed: "Yeah, I see that you are wasting away to a blimp."
"The New Bowling Ball":
Ralph: "My bowling ball got stuck on my finger and I can't get it off."
Ed: "Why don't you go on a diet? Maybe, it will drop off."
"The Main Event":
Ralph: "Do you want my salary to leak out?"
Alice: "Your salary couldn't even drip out."
"The Babysitter":
Ralph: "That phone is for you-you-you."
(Phone rings. Alice answers it.)
Alice: "Hello?..."(poking Ralph with the receiver): "It's for you-you-you."
"Curse of The Kramdens":
Man: "Carry Mr. Kramden to the train station."
(The men try to pick up Ralph but to no avail.)
Ed: "I think it would be easier if you went to the train station, picked it up, and carried it back here."
"A Dog's Life":
Ralph: "Gee, I remember when I used to weigh 165. Did you see me when I weighed 165?"
Ed: "No Ralph. I never did see your baby pictures."